He joined her, following her voice, and when he saw the still life she had arranged, he stopped dead. The sunlight glinted on the car and made the teddy’s dark eyes twinkle, but the toys looked so out of place in the empty room it was hard to look at them. They looked like grave markers.
And they did their job.
Dave held his breath.
The teddy keeled over.
And Dave burst into tears.
Rose had hoped it would work, but his reaction was totally unexpected. He went to the still life in the middle of the room, dropping to his knees. He picked up the teddy to put it right, but it didn’t work.
“His name’s Paul,” Rose said, remembering how important the toys’ names were to her brother.
“What?” Dave turned around, the first black tear appearing beneath his mask. “What did you say?”
“His name’s Paul.”
Dave stared at the cuddly bear in his hands.
Rose moved towards him, feeling cruel to be taking his picture in such a vulnerable situation, but also knowing that this was exactly what they had come for. Dave doubled over, clutching the toy to him.
Whatever she had said, it must have triggered something powerful inside him, just like his words about making him better had. Rose’s heart constricted. She felt horrible knowing that her words had caused him to fall apart like this.
She put the camera down carefully and crouched next to him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. Dave turned towards her instantly, leaning into her. He was shuddering, but his tears came silently. She pressed a kiss to the bit of forehead between the mask and his hairline, rocking gently.
“Thank you,” he said eventually, pulling back from her. “Let’s... let’s do this.”
Rose nodded and picked up his camera as he shrugged out of the robe and gave her Tony’s toys.
The black make-up looked ghostly as it ran down in rivulets from beneath the mask. Dave’s skin looked even paler than it was in the dimness of the room; she had set up one of the reflector panels to make the most of the natural light in the room, just like he had.
He sat on the floor, hugging his knees to him as he hid his face, relaxing a little as he drew a breath. She caught the light playing in his hair when it flopped onto the grain of the floorboard as he curled up on his side, and it was with great effort that she refrained from kissing the spot beneath his ear. She captured his back as he curled up on the floor, and it was only when he stood that she noticed the wetness pooling in her own eyes.
Dave touched the peeling, flaking paint, and the shutter clicked. “Drape the sheet over me,” Dave said, his voice thick. He had stopped crying, but the evidence of his outburst was still there. Rose hurried to get the sheet and did as he said. “Now pour the water over me. I want to see what it looks like, against the wall.”
Again, Rose obliged him. Dave gasped as the cool water soaked the sheet and made it stick to his body like a second skin. He was more naked now than he had been before, and Rose looked away as she saw how the sensation of the wet material affected him. He was growing hard.
He turned his face away, into the shadows.
“Come on,” he said gently, and Rose released the shutter. The wet folds, plastered against his body, were indeed an interesting contrast to the chipped background. She moved and experimented a little, ignoring his arousal until she decided to be brave and captured it as well. This was about Dave, after all.
Then it was over.
“Thank you,” he said, pulling the material away and bunching it up in front of him. Rose passed him the robe. She could see the goosebumps on his skin.
“I have the make-up remover in my bag,” she said. “I’ll get it for you.”
“Rose?”
She stopped but didn’t turn around.
“Thank you.”
Chapter 20
They packed silently, and Dave insisted on giving Rose a lift home when he learned that she’d taken a cab to the house because her car was at the garage. He was reluctant to leave her just yet, and when Rose accepted his offer gladly he knew that she felt the same way. “I’d like to drive, though. You still seem a bit upset and you need some time to compose yourself,” Rose said, holding her hand out for the car keys.
Dave nodded slowly and gave them to her. She was right. He was in no shape to go home, but neither could he go to the studio where he’d be by himself among photos of his family. When he’d seen the toys on the floor, something inside him had snapped, particularly when Rose had told him the teddy’s name. She had, just like he had earlier, found exactly the right words to break down his defences without reaching out to him telepathically.
Rose steered his red Volvo safely through the city to her house, where she pulled into the gravel drive as if it were her own car rather than his family car. He wondered briefly if she needed to worry about nosy neighbours. “I’ll make us some tea,” she said. “In the mean time, you can hop into the shower.”
A shower was a great idea. Although it was a warm day, it had been cold inside the old house, and the water hadn’t exactly helped to improve things. The wetness soaking through the sheet and spreading against his skin had aroused him despite the cruel temperature. “Sounds like a plan,” he said, leaning over the gear box towards her. They kissed briefly.
“Your lips are cold,” Rose said softly as she withdrew, casting her eyes down as sadness darkened her face.
“Sorry.”
The moment of sadness had passed as quickly as it had come, and Dave wondered what memory he had revived this time. “Tea,” she said, smiling.
The hot water felt wonderful on his body and he would have liked to enjoy it cascading down on him for much longer but he didn’t want to take advantage of Rose’s generosity. Her shower was simply gorgeous. It was a proper shower stall with the right fixtures, very unlike his own old-fashioned combination of shower and bathtub with a shower curtain that forever stuck to his bum when he came too near it, which happened often because he had to crouch a little to fit beneath the shower head. Once he had redecorated the kitchen, he decided, the bathroom would be next. Maybe he’d even find space for a second one so they could avoid the chaos every morning, especially now that they had Lottie living with them.
His skin was pink when he stepped out of the steamy shower stall, and he felt much better. He rubbed himself down with the large towel Rose had given him. He’d had to use her flowery shower gel again. He loved that scent. He gave his hair a vicious rub to dry it as best he could and slipped his clothes back on.
A delicious smell greeted him in the kitchen. That was definitely more than just tea. Rose was cooking. For him. For the second time that week.
She turned around when she sensed his presence and he dropped his gaze to his stocking feet, aware that he had been staring at her.
“Feeling better?” she asked.
“Yes, thank you.”
“We haven’t had anything to eat all day,” she explained. “I’m not sure though if you’re in the mood for food. It’s one of my favourites and you love pasta, so I thought comfort food it is.” She stopped herself when she noticed she was babbling.
“You’re amazing, do you know that?” he said, closing the distance between them. He bent to kiss her. To be able to do that was still very strange and he hoped she wouldn’t stiffen at the gesture, but instead she leaned against him and kissed him back.
“”Not really. I’m just hungry and following doctor’s orders. And Mickey’s.”
“The lower-case doctor’s?” he asked. “Sorry.”
Rose laughed. “Yes, the lower-case one’s. It’s much easier with you around, though.”
His eyes went wide. “It is?”
“Most of the time I’m just too lazy to make anything, or I’ll put it off until I’m not hungry any more. But above all meals taste better when you can share them with someone.”
He nodded slowly. “I haven’t eaten by myself in such a long time. Apart from the occasional
meal when I’m working,” he said. It wasn’t always a special meal when he cooked. Most of the time it was a chore that needed to be done, rather than something enjoyable.
“I guess cooking for your family is an entirely different affair,” Rose said.
“Yes, although I try to make it... you know, something important. Mealtime is when we all sit down together to discuss everyday stuff. Otherwise it’s just too chaotic and people feel left out,” he said.
“So, would you like some?” she asked. She bit her lip. “Here I go assuming you have all the time in the world.”
“As a matter of fact, I do have time. I’ve told Lottie not to wait for me because I had no idea how long the shoot would take,” he said. Her delighted grin made his heart melt. “I’ve promised the kids a proper weekend, though.”
Rose nodded in understanding. He could tell it wasn’t easy for her, and that, like him, she wanted to spend more time together. They needed to find a way to make this work. He opened his mouth to tell her that, but she gave him a pleading look that stopped him. “I’d love some,” he said although he wasn’t really hungry. His body was still singing with the rush that the photo shoot had given him.
This time, they sat down to eat at the breakfast bar facing the stove, and they ate their pasta in comfortable silence. It occurred to him that it was just as he’d wished for that evening in the rooftop garden, when all he had wanted was to spend time with her without the need to talk. Although he would have liked to sit facing her, it was probably a good thing that he wasn’t because that would have made him say things he wasn’t ready to say, and she wasn’t ready to hear.
After their meal they went to the lounge where he sank into the welcoming depths of Rose’s gigantic sofa. Much to his delight, she joined him there with two mugs of hot tea. He took in the late afternoon sun’s glow bathing the room as he wrapped his fingers around the warm ceramic. In spite of the shower and the food, he still felt a bit cold. When he looked at Rose after a careful sip, he found her awash in the wonderful light. “You are beautiful,” he couldn’t help saying.
Rose blushed.
He reached out to play with an errant lock of her hair. “I’m sorry,” he said, meeting her eyes, “for making you cry this morning. I hope I’ll never do that again.”
“It was good, actually. I needed it.”
Dave lowered his gaze to the caramel-coloured contents of his mug. He wanted to know what he had said to make her fall apart, but he wasn’t sure if asking her was a good idea.
“The Doctor kept telling me that I made him better,” Rose eventually said.
“Oh.” There he was again, the swashbuckling alien in his magic box. And Rose had known what was on his mind. For a moment he wondered if Rose had subtly sneaked into his mind, or if she had just learned to read him already. He closed his eyes to banish the thought.
“I’m not comparing you to him,” Rose said softly. “It’s a memory that I treasure.”
“It’ll be a while before I’ll get used to me being a reminder of him,” he said, looking up and smiling at her bravely. Memories were all they had now that Rita and the Doctor were gone. It would have been heartless and selfish to expect her never to mention these memories of the Doctor again, because he was sure that he would want to share memories of Rita with her. “I’m glad he thought so highly of you.”
“He did love me, Dave,” Rose said. “He just... he had his own set of rules, and I respected them, although I never agreed to some of them. The Never Look Back one, for example.”
“Are you telling me that he doesn’t want to remember you, now that you’re gone?” he asked, incredulous.
“He does, but he won’t admit to it. You see, a man who’s lived that long needs to protect himself. I understand that now.”
Dave wasn’t sure he agreed with her yet. Maybe after a while, when he’d had time to think things over, he’d understand.
“May I ask who Paul is?” Rose asked, sipping her tea.
“He’s my oldest son.”
She nodded. “I...”
“It’s okay, Rose. He’s fine. It was just... you found my Achilles heel. I’m so scared of losing my kids, I...” He interrupted himself, unsure of how much he wanted to tell her, how much more reality their relationship could bear.
“I’m not a Mum,” Rose said, “but I have one who’s terrified of losing my brother and me.” There seemed to be something else she wanted to say, but she stopped herself. She laughed nervously. “We need to discuss this before we can take it any further.”
“Yeah,” he said, drawing out the sound.
“Can we just... can this just be about us? I know each of us comes with a baggage, and I’d love to meet all your kids, I really do, but for now I was hoping we could be selfish. It might not be a good idea, because our baggage makes us who we are, but for now... I’d just like it to be about us,” Rose said, taking a deep breath and a fortifying sip.
“I’m glad you see us like this,” he said, “as people with a past.” He smiled.
“It’s true.”
He was about to reply when he felt his phone vibrate in the pocket of his jeans.
“Take it,” Rose encouraged him when she saw his hand fly to his pocket. She uncurled her leg from beneath her and stood to give him some privacy. She saw his eyes go wide as he checked the caller ID.
“Lucy, sweetheart,” he said, raising the phone to his ear. It had been a week since they’d spoken to each other. Stuart had called to let him know that Lucy was fine, but other than that he hadn’t had any news from Edinburgh. While at first the idea of not knowing how Lucy was had made him deeply uncomfortable, he also understood that she needed the distance. From the corner of his eye he could see Rose leave for the kitchen.
“Hi.” She sounded unsure.
“How are you?” he asked, moving towards the bay window with his mug. From there he could see out over Rose’s unkempt garden.
“I’m great,” Lucy said. “The new school’s great; it’s a fresh start. They don’t keep going on about Mum.”
Dave squeezed his eyes shut and ducked his head. The notion hurt, but he could also understand how difficult the constant attention had been for her. It had become so unbearable that she’d skipped registration and had only gone to her lessons. “That’s good.”
“The orchestra is much better, and Stuart has arranged for private violin lessons. It’s the same teacher Alice has.”
She hadn’t called Stuart Dad. But neither had she called him Dad. Dave wasn’t sure what to make of that. What was important was that she sounded happy and relaxed, as if she could breathe again after the constraints of her situation. He hummed. “That’s great.”
There was a short pause.
“I’ve got to go,” Lucy said eventually.
“We miss you, Lucy. All of us.”
“Yeah. Bye.”
Again there was a pause as though she were unsure what to make of his last statement. She rang off as he said goodbye. With a sigh, he returned his phone to his pocket and finished his tea. It was good to know, of course, that apparently she had adjusted so well to life in the posh Edinburgh town house. Maybe he’d worried too much about how she’d fit in that very different environment. Stuart had so much money, and his whole place, although tasteful, oozed wealth. Everything had been just so, neatly decorated and meticulously clean and tidy. He wouldn’t have been surprised to find it in an edition of Homes and Gardens.
Putting his mug to his lips he found it empty. He sighed and went to find Rose in the kitchen, where he could hear her pottering about. When she noticed him standing in the door, she smiled at him. “Everything all right?”
“Aye.”
“How are things with Lucy? I’m sorry, I heard when you said hello.”
“She’s great, thanks,” he said. Rose smiled at him. “What are you doing?” He wasn’t asking so much what she was doing, which was obvious, washing the dishes, as much as why she was doing it.
�
��I thought I’d tidy the kitchen a bit while you were on the phone to your daughter,” she said, implying that she’d expected the call to take much longer than it had. He would have preferred it to take longer, too. “I’m almost done.”
“Maybe I should go,” he offered.
She looked crestfallen. “Why?”
He sighed. Lucy’s call had roused him from the dream-like state he had been in since that morning and reminded him of his responsibilities in the real world.
“I was hoping we’d... spend some more time together. On the sofa.”
Bigger on the inside: Space, Time Travel, Alien Criminals (A Space Time Travel Mystery Book 1) Page 22
