by BA Tortuga
“Okay.” Jesse came up to him, pushed in his arms. “Everything feels so odd.”
“It does. It will be better in the morning.” He had to have faith in that.
“I believe you. I do.”
They picked at a small meal, neither speaking really. Finally, after staring at each other and the walls, they simply snuffed the lantern and crawled into the blankets, holding each other as if they were worried children.
He thought he’d never get to sleep, ever, but he did, the world disappearing and opening up into the vast blackness that was Jesse’s gift.
When it came in their dreams these days it was always someone or something familiar. Someone they knew. Usually Em, but there had been a few of Jesse’s Grounder friends, a few of the older Diné.
Jesse looked at him, smiled. “Well, hello love. I thought for sure Em would be here.”
“Me, too.” He glanced around, but all he saw was Jess. “Restless, baby?”
“Yeah. Yeah, you know I’m nervous about tomorrow.”
“Boys? Boys, is that you?”
That voice was as familiar as his own, as Em’s. “Momma?”
She ran up to them, hair dark as night, face unlined and happy. “Oh, Ezrah. I thought I heard you, son. I’ve missed you, so much.”
“Momma. Oh, God. He held her, the smell of wood smoke and roses making tears prick at the backs of his eyes. “I’m so sorry about Emmett.”
“I saw him, only moments ago. He says he’s busy and happy.” Momma squeezed him tight. “Jesse, my God, look at you.”
Jess grinned. “You look great, lady, speaking of.”
“Thank you.” Momma just laughed, which made Ezrah smile. How could he not?
“Are you all right?”
“I’m fine now. So glad to see you again, after so very long, and you look so fine.”
“I know. I thought for sure I’d be right behind Cyrus. He did sell the cattle, yes? He saved the ranch?”
“He did. Valley fever has taken everyone, though, old and young.”
“Did it take Chastain?” He shouldn’t, but he wanted the old man dead. The bastard had killed his whole family.
“Lord, no. He died of meanness more than a decade ago.”
He stared, then looked at Jess. “I haven’t been gone that long, Momma. His men killed Em.”
“Son, I haven’t seen your face in twenty-eight years. I married Cyrus, and we had a daughter, Lily.”
“A daughter?”
Jesse hooted, the sound weird and loud. “You didn’t name her an E name?”
“Cyrus’ mother was a Lily. Lily Rose. She has three children of her own. I sent them away, when the fever hit.” Momma looked at Jesse. “You haven’t seen any children about? Ones with white-blond hair?”
“No, ma’am. Mostly I meet dark-haired folks.”
Ezrah sat there, mouth opening and closing. When he finally found his voice he felt it sounded like a child’s, not a grown man’s. “You mean you. You’re here in the dream. Oh, Christ, Momma. I’m sorry.”
Her laugh was hale and hearty as he ever remembered it. “Whyever for? I’m whole now, and I ain’t got a single pain. You’re here, Em’s here. I reckon I need to find Cyrus and my other babies now.”
“I guess you do. I-You were happy, you and Cy?” Ezrah needed to hear he’d left them to have a good life. A solid one.
“We were. He loved me and built me a new kitchen. I gave him a daughter. I’m happier now that I got to see you again, chat. I get to, when I need to, yes? Emmett said I was welcome.”
Jesse’s voice was gentle. “As flowers in spring, ma’am. You will always be welcome here.”
“You know it.” Ezrah hugged his momma hard, not wanting to believe it, unable to refute what he knew was true. “I love you. I’ll always be happy to see you.”
She squeezed him tight, so strong, so whole. “Good to hear, son. Tell me goodbye, now. I’m fixin’ to have a wander.”
“Good night, Momma.” He wasn’t saying goodbye because he knew she wasn’t gone to him forever, no matter what had happened to her.
She wasn’t lost to him and his Jesse had done that, had given him Em and Momma, both.
Jesse leaned against him. “Ez. Ez, I’m so tired. Can we go home now?”
“We can.” Home to their bed. The pueblo. They wouldn’t have to leave now, he reckoned. “Come on.”
“Oh, good. Good.” Jesse followed him, fingers clinging to his. “So glad you’re with me.”
“Me, too.” His knees shook as he found the silver cord and began to follow it.
“I have you, Ez. I won’t leave you alone.”
“You did promise me. And Em.” He was fiercely grateful for Jesse, for their connection. So many people in his life had been lost and Jesse kept giving them back and bringing him new family.
New friends. New home.
A new west.
About the Author
Texan to the bone and an unrepentant Daddy's Girl, BA Tortuga spends her days with her basset hounds, getting tattooed, texting her sisters, and eating Mexican food. When she's not doing that, she's writing. She spends her days off watching rodeo, knitting and surfing porn sites in the name of research. BA's personal saviors include her partner, Julia Talbot, her best friend, Sean Michael, and coffee. Lots of coffee. Really good coffee.
Having written everything from fist-fighting rednecks to hard-core cowboys to werewolves, BA does her damnedest to tell the stories of her heart, which was raised in Northeast Texas, but is feeling the Colorado mountains calling. With books ranging from hard-hitting GLBT romance, to fiery menages, to the most traditional of love stories, BA refuses to be pigeon-holed by anyone but the voices in her head.
You can find BA at http://www.batortuga.com
The New Reality Series
Now Available at Resplendence Publishing
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The apocalypse has passed. The dead have risen. But what remains…
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Hundreds of years ago, Earth as we know it was laid to waste by the war to end all wars. Hunger and plague followed, and in the gaping wounds of a society thick with terror, greed and corruption took strong root. It split the human race apart. Those clinging to civilization fell to ruin, those who turned from it were left little more than cannibalistic monsters. From the darkness, Enoch has watched as the worst traits of humanity have destroyed the world he once knew. Denied even the mercy of a quick demise, the immortal “Angel” fills his days maintaining the Network, if only to bring some form of connection and order to a broken world, even as he has grown to despise the very beings left upon it.
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Best friends, Jack Penn and Isaac Ryan had each other's backs long before the super solar flare and deadly epidemic sent the world straight to hell seven years before. When Jack falls ill, Isaac is terrified of losing the one constant in his life - the very straight man he's been secretly in love with forever.
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One deadly mission—one last glimmer of hope…
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Also Available from
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Four years ago, a violent and abrupt attack changed Abram’s life forever. Thrust into the world of vampires, he was forced to leave the man he loved behind, determined to shelter him from the horrors and dangers of this new existence.
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Anaboris Clan Series, Book One
Can Jamie and Ethan overcome their hatred for each other before the vampire marriage they are cursed into kills them both?
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