by Tinnean
I poured a scant amount into the snifter and returned to the bed. Geo leaned forward and took the snifter from me, and I sighed. He seemed determined to get bosky. I removed my slippers and dressing gown and got back under the covers, and to my surprise, he handed me my brandy.
He was silent for so long that I wondered if he was going to continue at all. I took a sip of brandy and almost choked when he did begin to speak.
“So my father sailed away, and my mother remained at home, forgoing the beautiful dresses she would see in the shop windows, telling me with forced gaiety that once Papa was home again and able to spend the time with us, then would be the time to purchase them. If he wasn’t there to see her wearing them, she’d wait until he was there. She never said a word against him. Never once. And if anyone else did, she would find excuses for his behavior. He was an important man, whose work was exceptionally important.” He gave a mocking laugh. “So very, very important.”
He swirled the amber liquid in his glass and observed it as if it held the answers to all the questions in the universe.
“Compared to this important man’s important work, my mother and I could not even hope to hold a candle.”
“Geo….” I didn’t know what I could say, but it made no difference; he went on speaking as if I hadn’t tried to interrupt him.
“The first time I saw my mother cry….” He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “There was one particular gown, the color of her eyes. Did I tell you they were the color of violets after a rainstorm?”
“That’s very poetical. You did tell me they were violet.”
“The most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen. If I was the marrying sort, I’d look for a girl with eyes that color. Every day on our way to Hyde Park, we passed the shop where it presided in the window in solitary splendor, and every day she would pause to admire it. On this particular day, two ladies stopped to examine the gown. ‘I think I’ll have it,’ the one said to the other.
“‘But it’s frightfully dear,’ the other said. ‘Won’t your lord be cross?’
“‘I can twist him ’round my little finger.’
“‘Unlike that scrap of an Irish chit whose husband hastens to Surrey whenever he is in England?’ They both laughed, and their laughter was cruel.
“‘Never tell me she has no idea!’
“‘None whatsoever, my dear!’ To this day, I can remember how her voice dripped with condescension.” While Geo’s voice was harsh and bitter.
“‘But it’s common knowledge the man has been in love with Cecily Marchand since her come out!’ They made no effort to lower their voices. What did they care if they were overheard?
“‘And he spent this entire leave at Laytham Hall?’ The first woman tittered, Ash. The bitch tittered, while my mother stood on that goddamned pavement and listened to them tear apart the fabric of her life.”
“Did she… did she truly not know?”
“Perhaps she did; she never spoke of it, but if she was happier pretending that he was in the country on the King’s business, who were they to shred her beliefs?”
“Please, Geo. You needn’t say any more.”
“I’m almost at an end.” He took a final swallow of his brandy and looked about as if for someplace to put the snifter. I took it from him and set it on the bedside table, but he scarcely seemed to notice. “I had to speak, draw their attention to my mother, although that wasn’t my intent. ‘Laytham Hall? Isn’t that where Papa was staying, Mama?’ My mother’s hand tightened on mine.”
He closed his hand about my wrist as if to demonstrate, squeezed, and I felt myself turn pale from the pain. “Geo. Please.” He released me, unaware that he had hurt me, and I rubbed my wrist, knowing there would be bruises on it on the morrow.
“The two women whirled to face us, and they looked mortified. Not because of what they’d said, you understand, but because my mother had had the ill manners to overhear them. They turned and hurried away, the violet gown forgotten. My mother stood like a statue, and when I glanced up at her, I saw the tears streaming down her cheeks.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose, then dropped his hand to his lap, and I covered it with mine, seeking to give him some solace. He stared down at where my hand rested on his, and carefully I drew it back. “In the end, even what love she bore me was not enough to lessen the pain of my father’s careless treatment of her, and she simply faded away.”
“You have never loved anyone?”
“A useless emotion. I will never allow that to happen to me.” He cast aside the bed coverings. “I must go now.”
“Of course.” Dawn would be breaking shortly, and much as I wanted him to remain beside me, I knew he was correct. “You had best take the candle.”
“Yes.” He pulled on his nightshirt, which he’d never had the opportunity to don, and limped to his walking stick.
“Your clothing?” It was on the floor, mingled with mine.
“Kincaid will retrieve everything.”
“I think not.” I could not depend on the man to get them away before one of my servants arrived. I rose and went about the room, plucking up each article of clothing and folding it, and when I had them all, I handed them to him.
He had been watching me with his lips curled in a small smile.
“What do you find amusing, sir?” I bent and picked up his shoes, grateful that he could smile after telling me such a sad story.
“Ah, Ash. You’ve your spectacles on and not a stitch of clothing.” Geo’s smile broadened at my blush, and he ran his thumb over my cheekbone, then took his shoes, and opened the door. He didn’t stick his head out and peer cautiously up and down the hallway as John had been wont to do, for he didn’t care tuppence if he was seen or not. “Goodnight, Ashton.”
“Goodnight, Geo.” I held my breath, hoping that he would return to me for a final kiss, but no. With a soft snick, the latch caught as the door closed.
I returned to bed, and curled over onto my side, staring at the curtains that closed out the remainder of the night, but seeing nothing. His words reverberated in my brain. “I will never allow that to happen to me.” Now I truly knew where I stood. Or lay, as the case might be.
However, he found me appealing; he had said as much. He enjoyed the time we spent in bed. And he’d told me about his mother.
I was going to pretend he liked me. I was going to mind my tongue and not rip up at him and perhaps….
Perhaps it might one day even become true.
I HAD little doubt I would find any rest for what was left of the night, for with my lover gone, my bed felt shockingly empty, but I did fall asleep.
However, Geo had woken me frequently and had lov—rogered me thoroughly, leaving me with a satisfying ache deep within my bowels and in no doubt of his possession, and the result was I was late rising.
I washed and dressed with haste and hurried down to the morning room, wondering if Geo might be lingering there.
“Good morning, Aunt.”
Aunt Cecily, the remains of her breakfast before her, was just raising her cup to her lips. “Ashton.” Her lips tightened, her eyes grew wintry, and she set her cup down with a snap.
“Er… I seem to be late. My apologies.”
“Humph.” I’d never heard her make such an unladylike sound. “Bring Sir Ashton his hot chocolate, if you please, Colling.”
“Yes, m’lady. I’ll have Cook prepare a fresh pot.”
As soon as he was out of the room, Aunt Cecily snapped, “Were you aware of Mr. Geo Stephenson’s condition?”
“Condition? What condition? I’m afraid I don’t understand.”
“Do you not?” She glowered at me. “You must have got a good deal of amusement out of all the plans Arabella and I made during the last few days.”
“I don’t believe I ever exhibited the least trace of amusement.” I glowered back at her, becoming very tired of having the weight of the estate on my shoulders and no one with whom to share that burden. “Whate
ver is going on?”
“Apparently that injury Geo received on the Levant has put an end to any possibility of his… his ever having children.”
I gaped at her. “But… but… that would mean….”
“Oh, do please stop looking like a landed fish, and at least try to act as if you had an ounce of intelligence! What it means is that he has—”
Colling entered just then, and she bit back the rest of her words. The butler knew something was going on; good servants always did. He poured my hot chocolate and placed the pot at my elbow.
“That will be all, Colling. I’ll ring if we require anything else.”
“Very good, m’lady.” He left the morning room once more.
“What it means,” Aunt Cecily immediately took up where she had left off, “is that he has lost his manhood! And since he cannot perform the marriage act, he cannot give Arabella children!”
I started to choke on my hot chocolate. “I… I see. That is I think I….” I floundered. If what she was trying to say was that Geo no longer had the use of his organ, then of course she would think that Geo could not perform.
“Do you mean to tell me you two gentlemen did not discuss this?”
“Precisely, Aunt. I mean, it is hardly likely that Geo would talk about something like that with me. We… we are barely acquainted!” I was not about to tell her that his performance with me was more than adequate!
“And yet you seem to be quite fond of him.”
My cheeks heated. “He is a good man, Aunt. Did you not think so yourself? Do you not think so?”
“Yes.” She brought her cup to her lips. “I beg your pardon, Ashton. It just came as such a shock…. I should not have become angry with you. It is not your fault.”
“No, it is not. How has Arabella taken it?”
“Not well, as you may imagine.” I could imagine it, all too well, and I was relieved I hadn’t been present to witness it. “She ran up to her room in tears, poor child. Fortunately, Flowers and Mollie will see to her.”
I felt the blood drain from my cheeks. “Arabella will reveal all this to them.”
Aunt Cecily shrugged. “Flowers is very discreet. As for Mollie, she is turning into quite the competent lady’s maid. We’ll have to trust her to be discreet as well.”
“Will we?” I rose and crossed to the bellpull, giving it a vicious yank.
Flowers would most likely send the girl to the kitchen to have Cook brew a tisane for Arabella. I’d come across Mollie a time or two giggling and blushing with another of the maids, sharing one tidbit or another about the household. What the servants of one house knew, the servants of the entire countryside would know, and I would not have a guest in my house subjected to that.
Colling entered. “You wished something, Sir Ashton?”
“I want all the house servants in my study immediately.”
“Ashton?” Aunt looked puzzled.
“All of them, sir?”
“All of them.”
“Beg pardon, sir, but I’m not sure if Cook—”
“She may set aside whatever is on the hob.” I bit the words off one by one. “Do I make myself plain?”
“Yes, Sir Ashton.”
Colling had barely shut the door behind him when Aunt Cecily spoke. “I don’t understand, Ashton.”
“Don’t you, Aunt?” I snarled. “Do you want the countryside to get wind that our guest—the son of your very good friend—has been unmanned? I have no doubt Mollie will spread the word if given half a chance.”
She shrank back, then paled. “Oh, dear God, I hadn’t thought…. If George should hear…. What will you do?”
“What I can.” I smoothed a hand over my hair and started for the door. “Pray excuse me, Aunt Cecily.”
“Yes, of course. Ashton, for a moment, you… you looked very like your uncle.”
“Do not ever again say such a thing to me!” In spite of myself, I slammed the door behind me, and walked straight into Colling, who was standing there with an unreadable expression on his face.
“I beg your pardon, Sir Ashton.”
“What is it, Colling?”
“Everyone is in your study, sir.”
Hell and the devil! Never before had I confronted any of my staff, and I had wanted to be there when they arrived, seated behind my desk, looking in control; I’d needed that slight advantage.
“Excuse me, sir.” Kincaid approached. “Mr. Stephenson is wishful of you joining him in the—”
“Not now, Kincaid. I have some household matters that need attending.”
“But… yes, sir. I’ll let him know.”
“Do,” I muttered under my breath, knowing that Geo would not be best pleased. Still, there was nothing I could do at the moment but attempt to nip this bit of gossip in the bud. I glanced at my butler. “Very well, Colling.” I could scarcely tell him to come along; after all, the man was at least three times my age. I started toward my study with him a step or two behind me.
I paused in the doorway, somewhat taken aback by the number of servants standing there. They had never been all in one place at the same time, and I’d never realized….
I cleared my throat, drawing their attention to me. “I will keep this brief. Certain information about my guest has become—or soon will become—common knowledge within these walls….” I directed my gaze at Mollie, and she had the grace to blush. “Very personal information. It will stay within these walls. If it comes to my attention that anyone—Lord Hasbrouck, Squire Newbury, Colonel Whittemore, the Marquesa, the Misses Petre, Mr. Colbourne, anyone!—has been made privy to it, I will turn you all off without a character. It will not matter who is to blame, you will all be gone from Laytham Hall!” I forced each one to meet my eyes. I was not liked. I was not respected. But by God, I would be feared! “I trust I’ve made myself clear.”
The men shifted uncomfortably. Colling stared blankly past my shoulder, while David tried his best to emulate him. Cook and Mrs. Walker were stony-faced. Flowers looked put out. I wasn’t particularly troubled about her. The only lady’s maid she considered her equal, and thus worthy of conversing with, was the Marquesa’s, but since the woman had no English, I hadn’t much in the way of concerns. As for the housemaids, they whispered one to another until Mrs. Walker frowned fiercely at them, and then they subsided.
“That is all I have to say. Colling?”
“Yes, sir. Return to your tasks, everyone.” They quickly disbursed. “Was there anything else, Sir Ashton?”
“No, Colling. That will be all.”
He bowed, and I was left alone in the room.
My stomach rumbled, reminding me I’d had no breakfast. I rubbed my palm over it, relieved there was no one to hear the sound.
“Thank you, Ashton.” The sound of Geo’s voice caused me to startle. He was standing in the doorway, an air of faint surprise about him. How long had he been there?
“Why are you thanking me?” I expected rather that he would be taking me to task for not meeting him as he’d requested.
“No one has ever defended my honor before.”
“I did no such thing. And surely you’re mistaken. Your friends….”
“Are buried in nameless graves throughout the Empire.”
Nameless? How odd. And how sad. “Well, it was no more than any would have done.”
“Perhaps, but nonetheless, you were the one who did it, and I thank you. I must confess I don’t know why you did it.”
I didn’t pretend not to understand him. Threatening one’s entire staff with dismissal was generally not done. “It was the only way I could think to ensure their silence.” My stomach rumbled again. “Pray forgive me. I haven’t breakfasted as yet.”
He smiled. “I will join you.”
“I’m afraid everything will be cold,” I warned him.
“Somehow, I’m inclined to doubt that.”
The door to the morning room stood open, and I was astonished to see a number of my servants clearing o
ff the earlier food and others replacing it with steaming platters.
“I beg your pardon, Sir Ashton! Mr. Colling instructed me to have this done before you returned to finish your breakfast.” David poured me a fresh cup of hot chocolate. “Coffee, Mr. Stephenson?”
“Yes, thank you.”
“We shall have everything in readiness momentarily, sir!”
“Yes. Well. Er… yes.” Within moments, the servants had completed their tasks and whisked out of the room. “If you’ll help yourself, Geo?”
“Thank you, I could do with something. Breakfast was a rather truncated affair, I’m afraid.”
“I can imagine!” I filled my plate with eggs and sausages and some slices of buttered toast. “Whatever possessed you to make such an announcement over the breakfast table?”
He leaned toward me and filched a slice of toast from my plate. “I thought it best to get it out of the way as quickly as possible.”
“But to say you had lost your manhood?”
“Actually, I didn’t. I merely said the injury was to an inauspicious spot that rendered me an unfit candidate for husband, and Lady Cecily’s imagination ran away with her as Lap-Dog did with the Derby of ’26.”
“He was descended from Eclipse, wasn’t he?” Distracted, I stared off into space dreamily. “I would sell my soul for a stallion with his bloodlines.”
“Would you, Ashton?”
“Oh, yes. The stud fees would soon see our heads above water.”
“But I’ve towed you from the River Tick.” He put down the toast.
“Yes, and I am exceedingly grateful; although I cannot understand what would persuade you to do so.” I smiled and shook my head. “No matter. Tell me, sir. How may I entertain you today?”
Geo observed me somberly for a moment, then said, “I should like to see your stables.”
“Yes, of course. Your bays. I don’t know how you could bear to leave them behind. They’re very sweet goers! And they aren’t touched in the wind after a mile or so.”
“Oh?”
“They needed to be exercised. I took them out to Farnham every day or so, and once to Guilford.”
“You had no trouble controlling them?”