by Sandra Kitt
Diane stared at her. Then she looked at Hale. His expression said it all. She’d made a big mistake and a colossal fool of herself.
“Really? Where is he?”
“Iraq. Second tour of duty, but he got promoted to captain. You can see what happened when he was home the last time,” Jenna said wryly as she smiled, besotted, at her son. “He left me with a special package. Thank goodness for Skype, video calls and Hale. Colby got to see his son just hours after he was born. He said it was the best Christmas present ever.”
Diane didn’t dare look at Hale again. He didn’t have to say anything. Jenna had innocently, effectively, absolved him of all the transgressions she’d blindly heaped upon him.
“I’d say so,” Diane murmured.
“When are your parents arriving?” Hale asked Jenna.
“Tomorrow evening. They’ll be here for two weeks so I’ll get a lot done around here with their help. As you can see, Diane, I’m just moving in. I don’t have family in D.C. but this is Colby’s home. I’m so glad I had Hale to help me before Quinn came along.
“My mother is going to enjoy hanging pictures, but mostly I know she and Dad want to spend time with their first grandchild,” she continued.
“What about your in-laws?” Diane asked.
“Colby’s mom will join us next weekend. Only one missing is Colby.”
Diane knew she wasn’t mistaken when she heard the little catch and crack in Jenna’s voice.
“I hope he returns soon,” she said softly. “He’s got so much waiting for him. He’s lucky.”
“Me, too.” Jenna nodded. She turned to reach out a hand to Hale who took it. “Hale is one of Colby’s best friends, and he’s been wonderful to me. But I’m sure you know what a good man he is.”
Diane swallowed. She knew if she tried to say anything she would go up in flames on the spot for not being honest. She glanced at Hale.
He didn’t look any less angry with her.
“I gotta run,” he said, kissing the back of Jenna’s hand. “I have to take Diane back to her car.”
“I’m glad you brought her along.”
“Congratulations to you and your husband.”
Diane stepped outside into the cold December night. She filled her lungs with the crisp air, trying to clear her head. But it was going to take far more than that to snap her out of it. Behind her, Hale and Jenna said their goodbyes, and then Hale was closing the door as he joined her. Without a word he headed back to the parked SUV. Diane followed as if her feet were encased in lead.
Nothing flip or smart came to mind that she could say to dispel the tension between them. What she had already said could not be unsaid. And she knew Hale was not going to forget.
Hale drove into the parking lot outside the shelter and pulled up next to her car. He turned off his engine and a silence fell upon them. They both sat staring out the windshield. Beyond, there was the start of a light fall of snow.
“I’m sorry. It was wrong to assume…what I did,” Diane said simply. But she doubted Hale believed her. She couldn’t blame him.
He sighed, shaking his head.
“What is it with you? You still hold my past against me, don’t you? My family and where I came from. Your father taking an interest in me. You’ve always resented me, Diane. Thought the worst of me. Believed I’m just not good enough.”
“Hale, that’s—”
“Don’t even try to say that’s not true,” he said sharply, turning to stare at her profile. “At least be honest about how you really feel. Let’s put it out there, in the open, and deal with it. Then maybe we can both move on. You hate me.”
She felt cold, the blood seeming to drain from her face. There was little she could say to refute Hale’s accusation. And now that he’d said it out loud, she knew he was right. Mixed with her guilt was also shame. Hale had so managed to trap her with her own behavior.
“It’s…not that black-and-white and you know it,” she said defensively.
“Oh. You mean you had every right to be suspicious of me then. Okay, I’ll give you that. I could have become a bum, but I grew up. I had a great second chance to change my life and I did. But you just don’t see that. Or you don’t want to.”
“Well, I haven’t seen you in years,” she responded, annoyed.
“You made sure that you wouldn’t.”
Diane’s gaze riveted to him. “How do you know that?”
“I know you. I know how you feel about me. I didn’t want to do anything to create more bad blood between us. So I did just the opposite. I went out of my way to let bygones be bygones. I even wanted to invite you to my graduation. Your father said he didn’t think that was a good idea. Was he wrong?”
Stunned, Diane remained silent. At the time, no.
“Did you know your parents threw me a party when I passed the bar exam?”
Law school.
No. She didn’t know about that either.
“You were never interested in my life or what I could become. I understand why.”
“Why?” she challenged him.
“Because of this…”
And with that, Hale turned partially in his seat, placed a hand behind Diane’s head and forced her to meet his kiss.
It was not a rough crushing of his mouth to hers, or a use of brute strength to subdue her. But her surprise at his sudden movement forced her mouth open as she gasped in protest. Hale took full advantage as he locked his lips to hers, invading the warm cavern with his tongue. He staked a claim and took over.
Diane made a feeble attempt to free herself, her hand pushing against his chest. But then, the stroking and stirring of Hale’s tongue, the sheer mastery of his control and affect, seemed to magically dissolve her resistance. That gave way rather quickly to her full cooperation, allowing him full access and engaging his tongue with her own. Diane began to feel as if every nerve ending in her body was electrified.
Unlike the swift start of the kiss, Hale was very slow and deliberate in how he ended it. His moist lips clung to hers a moment longer until she felt only his warm breath against her.
Hale abruptly released her and sat back in his seat, staring ahead once again.
Diane tried to recoup, tried to feel put-upon. She was furious with herself. He’d caught her unaware and she’d totally embarrassed herself by giving in.
“That’s what you wanted from me when you were seventeen,” Hale said quietly. “Then, when you couldn’t handle it, when you didn’t even know what to do, you got pissed off at me.”
She remained quiet, his words evoking a time and place and feeling that periodically resurfaced and haunted her.
“I guess I should be grateful that you didn’t tell Adam I tried to rape you. My life would have really been over.”
She heard the underlying fear in Hale’s statement and went suddenly cold. Diane recognized, maybe more than she did as a teenager, that she could have ruined him, destroyed his life.
“I didn’t know what was going to happen,” she said.
“Sure you did,” he said wearily. “I was a guinea pig. You were testing your powers. Thank God for me, you failed.”
Diane caught her breath, as if she’d been slapped. She reached for her bag and scarf. “I hope you feel better, now that you’ve insulted me and said what you’ve been wanting to say for years.”
“You’re not insulted. You’re mad because I see right through you.”
That did it. He’d given her a reason to strike back.
“You know, Jenna’s wrong about you. You’re not a good man!”
Hale stared at her, his gaze roaming over her face with studied curiosity. Like she was a stranger. Worse, a bug. His eyes were blank suddenly and indifferent.
“Merry Christmas, Diane.”
It was the very last thing she was expecting him to say. She’d already steeled herself against another cutting remark, a mean observation. Diane opened her mouth to retaliate. But, for what?
Instead, she strugg
led to get out of Hale’s car and slammed the door behind her.
She felt the pressure of his mouth as he coaxed hers open. Her eyes were closed. It felt so thrilling that way, what he was doing. And his tongue, wet and aggressive, felt strange at first but now was making her feel tingly and ticklish down there, between her legs. She didn’t want him to stop. She slid her hands under his shirt, and the feel of his firm bare skin made the sensation swell and grow. Where was it going? How was this going to end? She was breathing hard, feeling her own heart thumping in her chest. His hand was curved around her butt, pulling her tight. He was hard where they pressed together. There was a swirl of something new in her stomach. But it felt…good. Delicious and dangerous. If he kept pushing against her, grinding their hips together…
Diane impatiently threw off the quilt. She felt like she was suffocating. She was sweaty. Then she was hit with the cool air of her bedroom, even though the baseboard radiator was releasing heat. She rolled onto her back and stared overhead. The shadow of the venetian blind at her window was outlined. Tiny little blurry spots seemed to be slowly moving across the ceiling. She closed her eyes tightly, but the dream was gone.
Diane got out of bed and went to the window. Outside the earlier flakes had turned into a snowfall. There was three to four inches of the white stuff on the street. All the cars were covered. And the world was absolutely silent and still. She wiped at the moisture at her throat and down between her breasts. She felt damp between her thighs, up into the apex of her groin.
It was a little after 3:00 a.m.
She stood staring at the beauty beyond her window and experienced a peculiar and unsettling loneliness. There were mounted Christmas trees on a number of terraces of nearby buildings in Adam Morgan where she lived, and grinning plastic Santa Clauses lit from the inside. Colorful decorations and garlands of lights were set to blink and twinkle off and on all night. There were star-shaped lamps and fake candlesticks in windows. Diane rubbed her bare arms and turned from the sight. Her apartment was very dark. There was no evidence of Christmas anywhere.
It’s so much easier this way, she told herself. Without the constant reminders she could tough out the holidays. But Diane had underestimated the power of the isolation she’d imposed upon herself because…
That was the question. Because of…what?
She wandered into her living room and curled into a corner of the sofa, hugging an accent pillow and staring out of the window and hearing over and over again Hale’s accusations. Each one seemed to seep into her bones, seemed to be planted in her brain. All of it now seemed in direct contradiction to his kiss.
She felt a swirl of response in the pit of her stomach, a gentle skipping of her heartbeat. She closed her eyes and relived the instant Hale’s tongue invaded her month and the reaction that she didn’t seem able to avoid.
The reliving of those moments continued as she sat in a near stupor, letting it wash over her until dawn. Until first light and her neighborhood came awake for the start of another day. She waited until a little after seven, a time she deemed decent, and then placed the call.
“Hello,” a sleepy voice answered.
Diane cringed. “I woke you up. Eva, I’m sorry.”
“Hmmmmmm. What time is it?”
“Too early. Go back to sleep. I’ll call later.”
“Honey, if you’re calling now you must have a good reason. What’s going on?”
“I’ll finish my appointments and rounds today. I’m sure I can change my schedule for tomorrow. There are other doctors to cover my patients.
“I’m coming for Christmas.”
Chapter 4
The hydrofoil cut its engines and coasted into the slip next to the pier. Already passengers were crowding the door of the gangway and were backed all the way up the stairs that led to the open upper deck of the craft. Then there was the luggage. Suitcases and baskets and tote bags and boxes and crates of produce and other foodstuffs, piled and ready to be off-loaded.
It was a routine that Hale had seen and experienced before, during a handful of visits to St. John, one of the three U.S. Virgin Islands. However, this was the first time that he found himself in the position of waiting for someone to arrive, instead of the other way around. He wasn’t looking forward to the encounter but he was prepared.
Several of the crew jumped to the dock landing, pulling on the heavy ropes to bring the vessel alongside and tie off the lines. The door was promptly opened and people began to file off onto the dock. They searched the bags being unloaded, grabbed their own, and walked off to be greeted by friends or family and driven away to near and far points on the small island. Many were carrying coats or still wearing boots. Many more were dressed in keeping with the tropics. Flip-flops, shorts, tank tops, sunglasses and hats, defenses against the intense heat of the sun. Most were visitors from the mainland, down for the holidays. But other than the comical attempt to string lights across Cruz Bay Square, there was no indication that it was Christmas day.
Hale, leaning back against the grill of the Jeep, slowly made his way to the land end of the pier and dock, standing in the shade as he carefully scanned the disembarking travelers. He was wary, intent on his first sight of Diane, especially given the last time they’d seen each other.
That had been a mistake.
Hale kept telling himself that but he wasn’t sure he believed it. It wasn’t as if he’d planned to suddenly kiss Diane like that. But it sure had surprised the hell of out him that she’d let him. And responded. Unbelievable. Then there didn’t seem to be a reason, a rush, to stop it right away. He just went with it, let his mouth ride hers, drawing from the unexpected encouragement. But when their kiss ended, Hale still knew it hadn’t made a bit of difference between them.
Yet he’d been thinking about it ever since.
He restlessly adjusted his black canvas baseball cap, his sunglasses. He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his olive drab cargo shorts, hoping he gave the impression that he didn’t care what Diane’s reaction was going to be to seeing him. It was her problem, not his.
He began to slowly pace. He frowned, wondering if maybe he’d missed her somehow and she’d gotten past him, was already grabbing a taxi to her parent’s house. Then he saw her.
That was when he realized he was wrong. Diane was his problem, too.
He stood watching as she stepped off the ramp from the hydrofoil. She adjusted her oversized and overstuffed tote onto her shoulder. Her suitcase was a not-to-be-missed bright red wheelie. She also had another tote, lumpy and misshapen with its contents, the opening revealing holiday wrappings. And she was carrying a wide-brim straw hat.
Catching her off guard, and unaware that she was being watched, afforded Hale a chance to see Diane with all her defenses down. She looked summery, half of her face lost behind outsized shades. She was wearing jeans with low-heeled boots. Not the skinny kind of designer jeans that did no woman justice, but a pair that flattered Diane’s long legs and shapely rear end. She also wore a white short-sleeved shirt, fitted to her torso, the front unbuttoned to the top of her breasts. Underneath was just a peek of a royal-blue cami. The outfit actually made her look cool in the tropical heat of the Caribbean.
He’d noticed in Baltimore that she’d cut her hair. It was a more becoming and sophisticated style for her somewhat square face. At the moment it was tumbled and windblown, but made Diane seem carefree, relaxed and sexy, Hale thought, raising his brows at the idea. That was also blended with the imagery of her when they’d kissed.
Seeing that she was determined but unable to manage all of her belongings, Hale began walking toward her.
“I’ll take that,” he announced simply, grabbing the handle of the wheelie and picking up the tote, which was a lot heavier than it looked.
Diane opened her mouth to protest and finally recognized him. He couldn’t see her eyes, but her mouth gaped into an O.
“How did…what are you doing here?” she asked, her tone reflecting genuin
e surprise.
“Welcome to St. John,” he said. He indicated her bags. “Is this everything?”
Still staring at him, she silently nodded.
“The car’s over there,” Hale said, and began heading off the pier.
He waited for the indignation and questions to come hurling at his back. There were none. He expected Diane to tell him to put her things down, that she would rather take a cab. That didn’t happen either. When he covertly glanced over his shoulder it was to find that, apparently unable to voice any objections, she had begun following obediently behind him, her expression pensive and closed as she stared at the ground.
Hale opened the passenger door for her, and then began loading her things into the back of the Jeep. He’d rolled the canvas top of the Jeep back and fastened it, making the car convertible. He was still waiting for a verbal assault, some remark from Diane to remind him of his place.
Nothing.
He got behind the wheel, turned over the engine and shifted into Reverse.
“How was your flight?” he found himself asking as he backed out of the parking space.
“Fine.”
“Good.”
He shifted into Drive and headed out of town along the North Shore Road.
Like the old British colonies on other Caribbean islands, the traffic moved on the left. He concentrated on his driving as the road twisted and curved sharply upward and the road rose above Cruz Bay. The air became cooler and there was a breeze. Out of his peripheral vision Hale was aware of how it tousled Diane’s hair, but she didn’t seem to care, actually turning her face into the wind and sunshine. He knew when she glanced his way, casually, several times. He could almost hear her thinking, I can handle this.
“No one told me you were going to be here,” Diane finally said.
She sounded more disappointed than hostile.
“I didn’t have any real plans for the holidays. Your folks invited me at the last minute. They said they didn’t think you were coming. You didn’t last year.”
