“I’m not sure I like the idea of trying to hoodwink the demons,” Penn says. “But I can’t say I have a better plan. After spending some serious time looking things over today, I don’t mind telling you all that this feels like a suicide mission. And if we all die, who’ll be around to make it right?”
I smile sadly at him. “You’ve been on Earth too long, my friend. We wouldn’t die. We would either spend an eternity in hell or be erased from existence. Our kind does not die.” When I hear myself say it, it sounds odd. My voice is so soft and soothing; some call it melodic. To use it to say such dark things feels wrong in every possible way.
Penn walks over and puts a hand on my shoulder, reminding me of our trip back through the mists after Kismet’s death. He is a dear friend. I would hate to lose him, particularly as a result of my poor judgment.
“Yes. Thank you, Michaela,” he says in a quiet voice. He’s not saying it to scold me, or because he’s irritated I’ve reminded them of the risk we’re taking. He’s simply telling me that we’re on the same team. I put my hand on his and squeeze.
“So, what do you think?” I ask the group.
Horatia is the first to speak up. “Go into hell cloak-and-dagger style? I’m in.”
Penn nods. Webber looks ill, but to my surprise, he nods too.
“Webber. You’re in? I thought for sure you’d want to stay behind,” I say.
Swallowing hard, he glances at Galenia. “I mean, I’m in if… everyone else is.” I’m not so sure. I can tell he’s not fully committed, and we need everyone to be on board one hundred percent. Hell isn’t a forgiving place, and once we’re in, there’s no turning back.
“Webber, no one will judge you if you want to stay behind. In fact, we might want someone to stay, just in case we don’t come back. You can hold down the fort, explain what happened, and send people after us if need be.” I try to sweeten the deal to give him an out.
But his face hardens at the challenge. “I said I’m going.” His tone is short. I pushed a button, and I’m not sure which one.
I shrug. “Wonderful,” I say, trying to mean it.
Galenia is the only one who hesitates to respond. “I have a bad feeling about this,” she says, and I hold my breath. “We can’t just go barreling into a place like hell without an exit strategy. Especially if we expect to escape with seven human souls.”
Penn turns to me. “Do any of the souls actually belong in hell? If so, it would make our job easier.”
“No. They were all taken from the gates of heaven,” I answer sadly, wishing I knew how or why.
“I hate to say it, but I agree with Galenia. We need a way to get out,” Penn says.
“Okay, well, I came up with our plan of attack. Does anyone else have an idea for a way out?” I say, feeling helpless and derailed.
Penn squeezes my shoulder before walking away and resuming his pacing. “Seven souls.”
“Is there any way we could get them out one at a time? Perhaps swap clothes with them or something? Leave one of us behind and come back for him or her later?” he suggests.
“I don’t know. Is anyone willing to stay behind in hell?” Horatia asks.
“I will,” I offer. Of course I will. I’m the one who found them, and it was my idea to go there in the first place. It seems right for me to stay with the lost souls. I’m a Reaper. Maybe I can offer them some comfort while we wait for rescue.
Galenia smiles sadly at me. “It can’t be you, dear Michaela. You’re our ticket in— and out—of hell.”
I sink down onto the couch behind me. She’s right, and it weighs heavily on me, pressing me deeper into the couch cushions. I can’t help them. I can’t do my duty as a Reaper. It’s a strange, almost out-of-body feeling, and I don’t like it.
The last time I felt this useless was… well, never actually. I wasn’t made specifically to be a Reaper. I was given a choice. I could have been an angel, a Keeper, or a Fate. But reaping is what drew me. The level of compassion the job requires has always come naturally to me. God warned me I wouldn’t fully fit in among the Reapers, but I knew that would be true no matter what vocation I chose. Usually, I don’t question that I made the right decision, but tonight, I need to accept the fact that I won’t be able to do my job the way I’d like.
“I’m happy to do it,” Galenia offers. “I’m not imperative to the mission. Maybe I can offer them some comfort.”
“Oh, sure, the Fate who spends her days thinking about how many different ways she can kill them is going to be super comforting,” Horatia teases. “I’ll do it. I’ll stay behind.”
“To be fair, you’re the one who cuts their threads. I just decide how they die,” Galenia says evenly.
Penn laughs at them, bickering like a couple of… well, sisters, and it occurs to me again how long these three have worked together. “I’ll stay behind. Kismet won’t be the first one out. I’d like to stay with her and Andrew.”
“Why wouldn’t you want your precious Kismet to be the first one out?” Webber asks, a hint of surprise in his voice.
“He’s right,” I say. “Nysa will have to be the first one out. She’s in the worst condition. If we want to save her from extinction, she has to be the first.”
“And if whoever brought them there returns while Penn is in her place? Don’t you think that person will notice Nysa isn’t Penn? They don’t really bear a striking resemblance,” Horatia wryly says.
“Nysa is black, Horatia. You don’t look like her either. Quit trying to take my spot,” Penn says.
She pouts, knowing she’s been defeated.
“Horatia, I’ll need you and Galenia both to help me keep watch for demons. I also might need help coaxing Nysa out. I don’t expect her to be terribly aware of her surroundings when we return. She was in rough shape the last time I saw her. She may need… convincing.”
“What will we tell a demon if we see one?” Galenia asks, her eyes filled with fear. I can’t tell if it’s fear of hell or fear for Nysa. Maybe both.
“I think we’ll have to tell them that one of the trainees isn’t quite cut out for reaping yet. That her weak stomach was deeply affected by the things she saw in hell. Just because it’s uncommon doesn’t mean it’s unheard of,” I offer. It’s thin, and I know it. The others exchange uncertain glances.
“It might work,” I say with a shrug.
“It’s the best we have for now. We will have to put this into play tomorrow night,” Penn says. We’ve spent too much time talking to do anything more tonight, especially if we don’t want to get caught midway through our mission. “If we come up with anything better in the meantime, we can execute that.”
I stretch out on the couch, not sure how to face the upcoming workday, or the night that will follow.
“I’m not sure what to do with myself tomorrow,” Penn says, a bit forlorn.
“You could just relax. Get ready for our trek through hell,” Horatia says, and then snorts at her own joke.
“I know what you can do to help,” I say. “We need extra Reaper uniforms. You’re already in this section of the heavens for the day. I was going to grab them on my way back from my shift, but if you’re looking for something to do, go for it.”
“Michaela, how exactly is a Keeper supposed to acquire Reaper clothes?” he asks.
“Use your imagination. The closet where we keep our uniforms is just by the gate. There isn’t too much foot traffic back there once we’re all out on assignment. Wait an hour or two after the workday starts, and go for it. You should be fine.” I sound more confident than I feel. My plan to take all of my dearest friends into hell has left me shaken and unsure of myself. Why is this a good idea again? Oh, right. Because the fate of humanity rests on getting into that prison, rescuing those inside, and finding out exactly what is going on.
We are reluctant to part ways, even though we have several hours before the workday starts. So we spend our time in my room playing games, laughing, and bickering. To be honest, we’
re all a bit sad when it comes time to report for our duties.
“Okay, so I’ll see you all back here tonight, ready to march into hell,” I say, forcing a smile. Their expressions are grim, but they all nod in response.
We part ways silently, each going to our respective workstations, and I turn to look back at the Fates. Horatia and Galenia hold hands while Webber walks in front of them. Penn looks longingly at them, and I know he wants to join them. I notice his fingers are twitching, as if they long to spin the threads of life, but he absently puts his hands behind his back.
Even though I know I’m at risk of being late, I want to comfort him. “There’s work to do, Penn. We need to focus.”
He nods and smiles, but I can tell it’s mostly an attempt to reassure me. “Get to work,” he says. Out of nowhere, he slaps me on the butt. I squeal and he laughs, lightening both of our moods.
“That’s one for the rumor mill,” he calls to me as I hurry away, rubbing my backside. When I brought him back to the heavens, he joked about the rumors that would spread if anyone saw me bringing a Keeper into my room. Heavenly beings don’t have illicit affairs. We just don’t feel the need for them. And often those who do indulge in a romantic relationship are judged for being too similar to the humans.
Heavenly beings have an irrational fear of ending up like Penn, ruled by their emotions when it comes to life and love. Personally, I don’t see what’s so bad about that. Penn is unique. Except now, he’s just drawn more attention to himself at a time when he’s supposed to do the very opposite. I glance around as I’m walking away, but by sheer dumb luck, no one is around to have witnessed my spanking.
I shake my head, thinking of how much I’ve missed Penn, hoping this workday goes by quickly so we can dive into our real work. In hell.
5
I feel hopeful as I walk to the naming room to get my assignments for the day. Maybe the other Reapers will have settled down after a night of rest and relaxation. Maybe they’ll be less angry and more helpful. Maybe.
But as I weave my way into the group of my fellow Reapers, nodding polite greetings as I go, I can tell my hope is in vain. Everyone is tense, and the mumbling is loud enough to create a faint rumble throughout the room. A hush falls over the space as the head Reaper takes his position on the platform. He’s such a huge presence up there; I can’t imagine defying him. But I feel like some of my colleagues are about to try. I cringe as he opens his mouth.
“All right, thankfully, there are no surprises to announce today. There’s also no news about Nathair. I’m sorry. As soon as I know something, I will pass it along to you. Currently, we are trying to pinpoint his last assignment, which will help guide our work. You all have a fair amount of freedom to go where you please in your downtime, so he could be anywhere.”
He isn’t wrong. Some Reapers choose to spend their downtime in exotic locations on Earth. Humans can’t see us unless it’s their time, so we can go anywhere. I’ve seen some lovely things on Earth. Waterfalls, glaciers, rolling hills, mountain ranges, tropical islands. The ancient buildings and ruins of Europe have their own special charms, reminding me of reapings gone past. Traveling the world is a wonderful way to decompress and re-center.
But from what Ryker’s said, it sounds like Nathair wasn’t actually approved for vacation. He really could be anywhere. I sigh, trying to stave off the hopeless feeling weighing me down. I only need to get through the day.
As our assignments start filtering into our minds, the boss keeps talking. “Here are your assignments for the day. As always, I hope you all have a good and productive day.”
But as he was signing off, a few of the Reapers walked over to a cluster of tables and chairs along the opposite wall of the naming room and sat down. A few others followed, until a group of six is gathered around the tables.
“I will not be working under these conditions,” Heth says. Of course he’s their leader.
“Nor will I,” the others say, one right after the other, until all the dissenters have voiced their grievances.
No, I think. This isn’t happening. It’s not in our nature. Although reaping isn’t normally a dangerous job, we’re simply not built to think of our own well-being first. The humans are our priority. But wishing the problem away is like trying to hold back the ocean with my bare hands.
Ryker’s eyes turn cold and hard. I shrink back from his huge presence and brace myself for what’s coming. I expect him to yell, to force them to work, to punish them, to threaten them, to do something. But he doesn’t. Instead, he stops halfway down the platform and looks down at all of us.
“Your actions do not come without consequence. Remember that.” His voice is low and menacing. I have no idea what he means by that, whether he’s talking about the huge influx of ghosts Earth is bound to see after today’s work, or if there will be an actual punishment for the dissenters. He doesn’t elaborate. But after seeing what happened to Penn for his single spinning mistake, I know justice is swift and harsh here in the heavens. I shudder to think what will happen to them.
“Those who remain will each be given extra names to account for… our losses. Thank you.” He looks directly at me and I nod, then he exchanges looks with a few of the others who are still standing in front of the platform. Without saying anything more, he turns to leave. We watch him silently, our group now divided between working Reapers and dissenters.
After he’s gone, and the Reapers are starting to scatter—at least those of us who are still willing to work—I climb up onto the platform and walk behind Ryker’s podium. I have no idea what’s gotten into me, but I have to say something. I have to try to make them understand who they’re hurting. I know I’ll regret it if I don’t make an effort.
“Guys, what are you doing? Don’t you understand how many people will be left behind because of your selfish choices? The humans are the reason for our existence. Our purpose is to care for them. To make sure they get safely to their eternal homes. If you turn your back on that, what will you be? If you are not a Reaper, who are you?” I’m panting by the end of the speech. The stresses of the week are catching up to me, and something that feels like what the humans describe as an adrenaline rush is washing over me. Energized by my anger, I clench my fists at my sides.
“Well, aren’t you a softhearted one?” Heth says. “Michaela, unfortunately, I couldn’t care less what happens to the humans today. I’m more interested in making sure I live another day.”
“Perhaps I’m not being clear,” I snap back. “Think of the child who will be left behind because of your selfishness. Have you ever left a child behind? I did once. It was horrible. The child just wanted to stay with her mother. And she ended up torturing the poor woman for the rest of her life. When I had to take her mother in the end, it was even worse. Now that child wanders the Earth alone.” I shudder at the memory. “If you take this path, there will be thousands of children left behind. Not to mention adults. The Earth will quickly be overrun with restless spirits. The Earth is a sanctuary for the humans, and for us, if you really think about that. And it will be ruined. Because of you.” I look hard at their faces. A few are unsure. So I strike while the iron is hot.
“It doesn’t have to be this way. There’s a terribly simple solution. You could come to work. Bring them home.”
One of the Reapers speaks up. She’s a shy girl who’s been working about half as long as I have. She’s not very social, so her fearfulness is one of the only concrete things I know about her. I’m not surprised she’s standing with Heth.
“But what difference can I make?” Her voice is small and quiet, an exact reflection of her.
I smile and climb down from the platform. Taking her hands in mine, I look into her eyes. “Even if you only take one soul home today, you will have made all the difference in their world. You will have saved that soul from a terrible, lonely existence. One that can’t be reversed.” I smile encouragingly at her, and it’s enough. She nods her acceptance. One other Reaper jo
ins our group, but there are still four on the selfish side. That means that over forty thousand people could be left behind by the end of the workday if the rest of us can’t pick up the slack. I try to focus on my success, not my failure, and I profusely thank the two who have agreed to work. Even if we can’t save everyone, we can do a lot.
As we approach the gate leading out to the mists, I work hard to clear my head and concentrate. I need to think about the people I can help. If I don’t, they will suffer too, and even more people will be fated to linger on Earth as ghosts. I can’t give in to the panic I’m feeling, but this problem seems much more immediate than our trapped souls in hell. One thing at a time, I think.
Taking a deep breath, I step out into the mists to collect my first assignment.
Of course, things don’t quite go the way I hoped. The dead are slow minded all day long. It’s as if they’re extra reluctant to come with us because they know something is off. I barely manage to finish my own list, and there’s no time to help anyone else.
Everyone else had the same problem, and a few didn’t even finish their lists.
All of us returned in defeat at the end of the day. Ryker calls us into the naming room for another meeting, and I worry it’s going to be an unpleasant surprise. The anxiety from the day threatens to boil over, and tears build in the backs of my eyes as I wait to hear what he has to say. After all the people we left behind today, I’m not sure I can take more bad news.
Ryker clears his throat as he makes his way to his usual position on the platform. The dissenters sit in the back of the room while the rest of us stand up near the podium.
He doesn’t waste time with a greeting or any other formalities. “As you can see, every Reaper who went out today returned home safely.” He looks toward the dissenters, who are laughing and joking together. Did they just sit in the naming room goofing off all day while human souls were left wandering untethered? I frown as I watch them throwing a paper ball to each other.
The Children of Wisdom Trilogy Page 21
