by Jamie Zakian
“Do I want to know?”
“None,” Otis said, lifting the joint back up to his own lips.
A snort burst free, and Sasha snatched the joint. As if she’d believe that shit. “Yeah, okay.”
“I’m serious.”
“You guys were doing pornos.”
“I know,” Otis said.
“Them twats must’ve been all over Dez.”
“They were, but he didn’t touch a single one of them. And I’m not talking about this last year. He hasn’t looked at another woman since the night we fished you out of the cellar.”
Otis had always been a hard man to read. He seemed different now. His eyes didn’t hold that cruel edge any longer; lies and schemes weren’t circling behind his gaze. Still, she couldn’t trust…anything.
“You don’t know that. Dez could’ve fucked around when you went home.”
“The big house is my home,” Otis said in a sneer. “It has been for the last five, almost six years.” He leaned over, taking the joint Sasha had completely forgotten to hit. “I tried to pull him out of the slump a few years back, but he said it wouldn’t matter how many chicks he fucked. That it wouldn’t do shit, cause none of them were you.”
All the little hairs rose on Sasha’s neck, her arms. Fuck. Her entire body had become a resting place for electric shocks. She shot to her feet, picking her blood-stained pants off the floor.
“Where you going?” Otis asked, stumbling away from the door to keep from being trampled by Sasha.
“To find Dez.”
“What about that crazy bitch?”
For the last five minutes, Sasha had been subjected to the sound of Rosalie’s sweet moans echoing through her motel wall. Once, for about a half of a second, she even heard Vinny grunt. The noises sparked so many uninvited feelings. Rage flared, jealousy burned, but the sensation that scorched the hottest really caught her off guard, lust. She shouldn’t want to bust down Vinny’s door and join him in that party, yet she did.
“Fuck that crazy bitch,” Sasha said, shoving her feet into her boots. The fractions of warmth she could gain from the room next door paled in comparison to what Dez had to offer. His arms filled her body with such strength, recharged her broken will.
Sasha hurried out her motel’s door without bothering to lace her boots.
“Wait!” Otis called out. He grabbed her gun from the bed, reloading the clip he swiped earlier. “Don’t forget to use protection.” He slapped the gun into Sasha’s palm, winking.
***
Dez
Dez walked away from the motel, peering down the sidewalk beside a three-lane road. There were countless yellow cars, buildings that damn near glowed as they reached toward the sky, but no Cash. The dude must be in that room with Vinny and Sasha’s sloppy seconds. This city seemed to bring out the nasty in everyone who set foot in it. He’d be damned if he let that shit creep up on him. He was getting the fuck out of this city before traces of its debauchery could seep beneath his skin.
Tiny chucks of pavement scattered as Dez stomped across the parking lot, toward the semi at the far end of the motel. He’d wait for five minutes. If nobody showed by then, he was splitting.
Dez climbed up the running board and opened the driver’s door. As he dropped his ass into the cushiony seat, a sliver glint caught his eyes. The keys. His dumbass brother left the fucking keys in the ignition, in an unlocked truck, in the middle of New York City. Vinny was going to be one sorry motherfucker because this semi was getting boosted, by him.
The cool metal of the ignition brushed Dez’s fingertips, the keys clinked, and the passenger door flew open. Dez jolted back, reaching for his gun. Just as his fingers wrapped around the butt of a revolver, Sasha poked her head into the cab.
“Hey,” she said, crawling up onto the seat and shutting the door. “Going somewhere?”
“Home,” Dez barked, making both of their bodies flinch with the sharpness of his tone. After a deep breath and a drag from the cigarette he’d snatched from Sasha’s hand, he was ready to form somewhat non-spiteful words. “Since your fucked up family is done using me as bait, I’m getting gone. It looks like Vinny’s pretty happy slopping up your leftovers so I guess you can keep him, but I’m taking Cash with me.”
“Listen—”
“No!” Dez lifted his hand, blocking Sasha’s pout from view. “Don’t you goddamn talk to me. You’re the fucking devil, Sasha. You’ll spout out some lies about love, and I’ll just hand over my heart. Even though we both know the only thing you can feel is sorry for yourself.”
Sasha jolted back, as though his words had formed into a hand and slapped her. A heavy silence clung to the cab, thicker than the stale cigarette smoke trapped within. Sasha’s eyes glossed over, but only for a moment. Any second, she’d unload on him. Any second now.
Barbed slurs never erupted. Sasha remained still, quiet. Without her hurling back hate, his harsh words just sounded shitty.
“Tyler needs me.” Dez reached for the ignition, and Sasha grabbed onto his arm.
“I need you!”
Her voice trembled, worse than the hand that clutched onto his wrist.
“Please,” Sasha said in a near whisper, “don’t leave me.”
Dez jerked his arm back. That sounded real. He could almost hear the pain in her voice. “Jesus Christ,” he sputtered. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”
Sasha looked up from her lap, and a tear rolled down her cheek. Dez flinched, holding back a gasp. All the screwed up shit he’d done to her yet she never shed a tear, until now. The pain behind her stare twisted his gut. Sasha had a million reasons to cry. He didn’t want to be one of them.
Before his brain could get a say, he wrapped his arms around her. The instant Sasha’s weight fell against his chest, a wave of heat rushed through him. Although he couldn’t place the sensation, he cherished it. The ripples of warmth filled in all his cracks, somehow making him whole again. Then her lips pressed against his own. Fire drove her kiss, burning stronger than ever before and sweeping in to incinerate every thought in his mind. He squeezed tighter, clutched Sasha harder, yet he couldn’t get as close to her as his heart desired.
“Stay,” Sasha whispered between gentle kisses. “Stay with me, Dez.”
Her soft plea sent chills. He’d stay with her forever, except there was someone even more fragile who needed him.
“Tyler,” Dez said. He pulled away, and Sasha latched onto his shirt.
“He’ll always be in danger,” she said, her fingers shaking as she clung to his collar. “Unless you help me kill the fuckers who want to hurt him.”
As much as Dez hated to admit it, Sasha’s backward logic actually made sense. He’d be damned if his boy had to live with one eye over his shoulder. Dante had fucked with his kin for the last time, and whoever was stupid enough to follow the man deserved a bullet to the head.
“I’ll sta—”
Sasha locked onto Dez’s lips. The force of her body falling against his chest drove him back, between the seats and into the sleeper cabin. Her deep kiss robbed him of breath. He didn’t need to breathe anyway. Her embrace carried the secrets to life. Only while lost in her grasp did every question clear. Without her touch, her lips, her hands running underneath his shirt, nothing made sense.
“We’ll slaughter those bastards,” Sasha whispered, unlatching Dez’s belt. “Then we can go get Tyler, bring him here.” Her breath flowed over his neck as her fingers slipped inside his boxers. “We can all be safe here.” She gripped the one part of him that yearned for her the most, and he almost jumped out of his skin. How her clutch could be so hard yet soft, he’d never understand but forever appreciate. “We can be together.”
Whatever the hell Sasha was saying, it all seemed just fine right about now.
“Yeah,” Dez moaned. He just wanted to put that out there, let her know she was on the right path with the whole kicking off his jeans thing. That other shit could get sorted out later. First things first, h
er pants had to come off.
Dez held Sasha tight, rolling her back to the thin mattress. It wasn’t easy to maneuver in this cramped sleeper cab, on a flimsy piece of foam meant to be a bed, but goddamn he made it look sexy.
“I love you,” Sasha said, in more of a breath than a statement.
That stopped Dez’s tug of Sasha’s pants somewhere around the ankles. He looked up, into her smile. The blaze racing through his veins was just a flicker compared to the one that lit Sasha’s stare. Her pants were in the way. They were always in the way. Dez ripped them off, easing between her legs. His heart jumped into his throat. He was about to have sex with his wife, for the first time since she found out they were married. She had to feel it, the electricity in the air. If not, he’d make her feel it.
Slowly, and with a slight amount of thrust, he slid inside her. “I love you too, baby.”
***
Cash
Cash walked across the motel’s parking lot. As he neared his room, a loud moan streamed through the door. He staggered back. Vinny might have stumbled dick-first into a potentially deafening mistake. It sounded like a roomful of cats were fighting behind that door. The dude better be making good use of the box of condoms on the nightstand, because goddamn this place was filthy.
A cool breeze laced in the scent of week-old vomit ran over Cash as he turned toward Sasha’s door. He stared at the faded number on her splintered door for what felt like five minutes. He lifted his arm only a tad then froze midair. No way was he knocking. Sasha scared the shit out of him. She’d probably unload a full clip before she asked who was there.
Cash took a step back, eyeing the semi across the parking lot. Nobody would toss him out of there. He could sit back, roll a bone, and actually smoke the fucker in peace.
The bag of weed was in hand before Cash climbed up the running board. He opened the passenger door, hopping inside. A quick glance into the back and his entire body froze. Except for his jaw, which dropped wide open. Somehow, he had climbed into a semi and stumbled into his wildest imagination. Sasha couldn’t be naked in front of him, riding Dez in the sleeper cab. There was no way her tits looked that perfect in real life. It must be a dream. He would’ve noticed the curves of her hips, the ripples on her stomach before now if it were real.
“Fuck off,” Sasha yelled, throwing a boot into the front.
The bag slipped from Cash’s grasp as he nearly fell, backward, out of the truck. He reached for his buds when another boot sailed past his face.
“Oh fuck!” Cash slammed the door of the semi shut. His legs locked stiff, and his breath barely flowed. He stood in front of the semi’s door, staring at his own shocked eyes in the shiny surface. The sweetest sounds flowed from within the slightly swaying cab. It was nothing like the screeches erupting from Vinny’s room. The noises echoing from the semi were cries of passion, a wordless declaration of love.
Cash shoved his hands in his now empty pockets, turning away. Dez might be the luckiest bastard alive. Archer Brothers Productions was dominating the porn industry, the guy had the coolest kid ever, and then there was Sasha. The goddess of his fantasies had returned, shining far brighter than he remembered. Cash walked through the bits of paper blowing across the parking lot, back toward the line of motel doors. If ever he wanted to live in another’s skin, it was now. He’d trade places with Dez in a heartbeat. To be the man enjoying the hot woman instead of chasing the hot woman’s ghost all over the country was far better.
A throat cleared and Cash looked up, right into Otis’s chest.
“Shit!” Cash stumbled back a few steps, shrinking down at the hard glare beaming at him.
“Did you see where Sasha went?” Otis asked.
“I umm…I don’t, umm…”
Otis pushed Cash aside, looking at the semi. “Was she in the truck?”
“I didn’t see it,” Cash mumbled.
“Was she fucking Dez in the truck?”
A snicker followed Otis’s question, and a prickly heat crept up to sting Cash’s cheeks.
Otis chuckled, backing toward Sasha’s now open motel door. “Her mob buddies are on their way here. Go fetch her, let her know.”
“I’m not going back over there. I’ll get Vinny.”
“You’ll get them both,” Otis said, his smile warping into a glower. He walked into Sasha’s motel room, slamming the door shut behind him.
Cash peeked over his shoulder, cringing at the thought of opening that semi’s door again. This time, Sasha would probably hurl a blade since she was out of boots. He’d get Vinny first. Hell, he might even get thanked. With that train whistle of a woman still piping, his buddy must be deaf by now.
Chapter Twenty-One
Sasha
Sasha leaned back, letting her weight fall against the firm chest behind her. Dez slid his arms around her waist as she twisted a joint from the bag thoughtfully left by a peeping prospect.
“I can’t wait to bring Tyler here,” she said, fishing a lighter from the pants beside her.
“What, like for a visit?”
“No. To live.” Sasha got in two hits before Dez plucked the joint from her lips.
“My son ain’t growing up in no city.”
“We talked about this, like thirty minutes ago. You said yeah.”
“I don’t remember none of that shit,” Dez said between puffs, reaching for his jeans.
This time, Sasha snatched the joint with no plans on giving it back. “Right before we had sex, I said we should bring Tyler here when shit cools down and you said yeah.” She hurried to dress. Dez looked like he was about to bolt, then of course she’d have to give chase or he’d think she didn’t care.
“Fuck, Sasha. I wasn’t paying attention. Your hand was on my dick.”
Knuckles banged on the passenger window, and Sasha almost grabbed her gun. “Dammit Cash—”
“It’s Enzo.”
Sasha froze, only her gaze moving to Dez. It was strange, the sense of wickedness that wormed its way into her gut. Enzo had dragged her from many beds over the last few months, but none had a man in them. For Enzo to see her tangled in the sleeper cab with Dez felt like a betrayal to herself. She couldn’t accept the depravities of her own sexual appetites, which meant no one else would either. This could be the end of her very short reign, but she wouldn’t live in lies again, so she yelled, “It’s open.”
The door squealed open, a shoe tapped against the running board, and Enzo poked his head inside.
“It figures,” Enzo said, climbing into the passenger seat and shutting the door. “All these motel rooms, and you’re holed up in the back of a semi.”
Harsh leers of judgement didn’t rear their ugly head, malice wasn’t filling Enzo’s eyes, only a slight hint of amusement. For the first time, Sasha was pretty damn happy to feel so stupid. The Lazzari family had always accepted her. To expect otherwise was asinine.
“Did you find Dante?” she asked.
Enzo dipped his head toward Dez, narrowing his gaze. “Is he one of your crew?”
Sasha glanced at Dez, catching a chill from his frosty glare. “Actually, this is my husband, Dez.”
“Husband!” Enzo leaned back, staring Dez down even harder. “Since when?”
“Umm…” Sasha dropped her stare. That was a good question. She had no idea how long they’d been married. The date was supposed to mean something. Too bad nobody bothered to tell her what it was.
“Five years,” Dez said, his sharp glare now fastened on Enzo.
“I see.” Enzo tucked his blazer behind his holster, placing his hand on the butt of his gun. “You okay with that, boss?” He was speaking to Sasha, though his eyes never left Dez. “This man, forcing you into marriage while you were in a coma?”
Sasha shrank down. When put that way, it sounded pretty fucking harsh. “It’s not like that. Dez is good people.”
“Fuck this,” Dez said. As if the cab were on fire, he jumped into the front and bolted out the driver’s door.
/> The cab rocked when the door slammed shut, bursting the sanctity created by Dez’s warmth.
“Sorry, boss.”
“Stop calling me that!” Sasha leaned into the front, grabbing a pack of smokes. “So, Dante?”
“I got a lead, but that’s not why I’m here. Word’s out about Tony and Othello. A meeting’s been called with all five families at Fat Tonys. Set for eight o’clock this morning. I wanted to give you some time to prep Othello.”
“Who’s gonna prep me?” Just the thought of sitting at the head of that long table brought on the urge to run screaming. All the weed in Cash’s stolen bag wouldn’t be enough to calm her nerves, and the dude had a lot.
“Please,” Enzo said, opening his door. “You were born for this.”
The cab swayed as the door slammed shut, leaving Sasha alone with the sad truth. She actually was born for this. Enzo hadn’t meant to, but he’d just shone a glaring light over her entire life. She was a construct. Her mother had known this would happen, shaped her to fill the Lazzari seat. The moments of love, which carried her through a lifetime of cruelty, were never real. Her mother just used affection to keep her clinging so the training could continue. For some insane reason, it made Sasha proud to know she’d fulfilled her mother’s expectations, which also made her want to retch.
Sasha jumped into the front seat, damn near bursting from the truck. Another second alone with her sorry self and she really might puke. Regret came quick when her feet hit pavement. Otis glared from the doorway of her motel room, Dez glowering from within. They were both waiting for her. That tiny sleeper, with its ability to conjure jagged memories, wasn’t looking so bad after all.
“He came to call a meeting, didn’t he?” Otis asked before Sasha could pick her boot off the dirty parking lot. “With all five families, right?”
“Yeah. To introduce you as Don and work up a strike plan on Dante and the Mancinis.”
