Disappointment Grows
Annabelle awoke with a start. A rooster crowed in the distance and she sighed and rolled over. She closed her eyes and lay back on the pillow. She heard the sound of heavy footsteps approach her door. Her heart pounded and she drew the covers to her chin. She expected the door to open, but the sound faded and she let out a long breath.
The first rays of sunlight peeked into her window. It was earlier than normal for her to be awake. But David was already up and moving and starting the day. Did he expect her to be awake this early every day? She had been exhausted form her journey and they said little to each other after they arrived. He had carried her things to her room and told her good-night, but hadn’t said anything more.
She decided to err on the side of caution. She hopped out of bed and dressed with an eagerness that surprised her. She ambled down the stairs and stopped in the kitchen. David had already lit a fire in the stove and was preparing something. Her stomach rumbled. She was starving.
“Good morning,” David said with a smile. “I don’t cook much, but I do make good porridge. I don’t mind making breakfast in the mornings. If you could prepare a light lunch and have it ready around noon and then a large dinner around five I would appreciate it. The washboard and soap are over there.” He pointed toward the corner. She knew every item there, but she’d rarely, if ever, used them. “And if you could keep up with the basic housekeeping that would be perfect. I apologize for the mess. Tending to the farm here takes so much time I just can’t keep up. I do my best, I guess.”
She listened to his words and the weight of them descended on her. He expected her to take care of all of this? Her mind was spinning. She’d never cleaned a day in her life. She had never prepared a full meal for anyone. Sure, she’d pestered the cooks as a young girl, but she’d never paid attention to what they were doing. What was she supposed to make, and how was she supposed to make it?
David scooped porridge into a bowl and handed it to her. He did the same for himself.
“I already ate,” he said. “I got to get out to get to my chores. I’ll see you around lunch time.” He clapped his hands together and walked out of the house.
Annabelle stared down at the bowl of goop she held in her hands. Good porridge was a contradiction in her mind. She looked around at the mess that surrounded her and that question filled her mind again. What have I gotten myself into?
David’s stomach growled as he made his way home for lunch. The porridge he’d eaten for breakfast hadn’t been enough to sate his hunger. He’d have to get used to making breakfast for two now. Or maybe Annabelle would take that over for him. He hated to ask too much of her right off, but this time of year he really could use all the help he could get.
He ambled up the porch steps and opened the front door. The kitchen was empty and there was no plate or food there waiting for him. He closed his eyes and let out a long breath and wondered where Annabelle was.
He heard light footsteps on the floor upstairs and he shook his head. He bounded up the stairs two at a time. The door to her room was shut and he knew it wouldn’t be right to barge in. He wanted to know what was wrong. Maybe she’d fallen ill. He knocked on her door.
He heard her walk to the door before the door opened a crack and she peered out.
“Is it noon already?”
“It’s past noon.” His curt manner surprised her. She felt her cheeks redden and she tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “I didn’t realize it was so late.”
“I’ll fix something myself,” he grumbled. What was she doing in there anyway? Surely her clothes could have waited a little longer to be put away. Come to think of it, had she done anything while he’d been gone? Clothes still spilled out of his hamper, the floor needed to be swept and he didn’t recall the front room or kitchen being any cleaner than when he left earlier that morning. She stepped into the hallway and he towered over her. “Please have dinner ready by the time I get in from the fields.”
“About that,” she began. “Would you mind if I went to town and hired someone to clean and cook for us?” Her brown eyes met his as she awaited his reply.
“You want me to let you hire someone to do your work for you?”
Annabelle nodded.
“You want to hire somebody? To do your work?”
“Yes.”
“No.”
“No?”
“Yes, I said no.”
“I didn’t expect…” Her voice trailed off and she crossed her arms.
He’d heard a few horror stories about mail order brides. He’d thought Annabelle was different. She hadn’t expected what? To work? She seemed nice enough in her letters, but perhaps he had misjudged her. He knew her situation was desperate, but sometimes people could say anything when they were desperate. Maybe her letters had told him what he’d wanted hear just to get her passage here. She hadn’t seemed deceptive, but then again he’d really only been in her presence less than a day. He walked down the stairs and stopped at the bottom.
“Please have supper ready when I get home tonight,” he instructed in a calm voice as he looked up at her. “I’ll be home when the sun begins to set.” He walked into the kitchen to scrounge up something quick for lunch and then head back out.
Annabelle flopped down on her bed. Now what was she going to do? Asking for a cook, a maid had been a last minute idea. She’d hoped that he would agree. He owned his home and seemed to be successful. Surely he had the money to afford the help.
She went to her bag and shuffled through the letters they’d exchanged the past few months. He had mentioned that he’d need her help around the home, but she hadn’t realized he’d expected her to do everything.
She nibbled on her lower lip. Until they were married he could still send her back. But the only other option was to return to live with her uncle, and she knew that wouldn’t last long with his lecherous partner waiting to take her.
She heard the front door bang closed and she held her breath and listened to make sure he’d gone. She tiptoed down the steps and into the kitchen.
She was hungry. The porridge was horrible and she ate only one spoonful. She looked around the kitchen and saw a dirty plate in the wash basin.
She sighed and walked to the kitchen pantry. Baking might not be so bad. How hard could it be? She found an apron hanging in the pantry, put it on and set to work on dinner. Her dresses were too beautiful to ruin on housework, and they were the only ones she had.
Recovery and Reality
Tears burned in Annabelle’s eyes as she sat at the table and stared at the mess she’d made. She’d found some sort of salted meat in the pantry and whatever it was she made, it smelled horrible and looked even worse. The kitchen was a mess with flour sprinkled across the table and floor, and a smoky haze filled the air. Dishes overflowed the basin and her dress was ruined.
She buried her face in her hands and sobbed. She’d tried, she really had. David would be home any minute and she worried what he would say. Her heart pattered in her chest as she heard voices from outside. He was home.
The door opened and David walked in. He took off his hat and hung it on a hook beside the door. He entered the kitchen and she watched him look around at the mess before him. She held her breath and felt faint.
“Is this… dinner?” His voice was soft.
“Yes.” She took in a deep breath and nodded and wiped the tears from her cheeks.
“What is it?” he asked as he stared down at the blackened blob on the serving plate.
“Casserole?”
“I see.” The corners of his mouth lifted up into a smile. “Its not going to kill me, is it?”
“I hope not.” Annabelle grimaced. She’d used things she knew were edible. The idea seemed good at the time, but maybe she’d used too much or too little of something.
“Well let’s eat,” he said as he took a seat at the table.
Annabelle closed her eyes and let out a breath she hadn’t realized she
’d been holding. She scooped a helping onto his plate and a much smaller one onto hers. She didn’t want to eat it, but there wasn’t anything else. After this disaster maybe he’d reconsider hiring a cook. Surely he wouldn’t let her in the kitchen again.
“Have you cooked before, Annabelle?” David asked as he shoved some food in his mouth. He scrunched up his face but didn’t say anything.
“This was my first time,” she admitted.
“I’ll speak to Mrs. Parker about coming here a few days this week, if she can. She’ll be able to help get you get caught up on the chores and give you some tips on…cooking.” David paused and put another forkful of casserole in his mouth.
“Oh thank goodness. That would be lovely.” Annabelle closed her eyes and smiled.
“But don’t mistake her for a maid, Annabelle,” he warned. “She’s here to help you out and show you a thing or two. I still expect you to take over.”
Annabelle’s mouth popped open. She would still have to do all of this? Fresh tears pooled in her eyes.
“Have you ever done any hard work before?” David inquired as he shoved another bite into his mouth. He swallowed it down without chewing and chased it with a long drink of water.
“No. My family had people who did things for us,” she said with a shake of her head. “I was hoping there was someone you could…hire?”
“No. There isn’t anyone. This isn’t Philadelphia, Annabelle. I thought you understood what you were getting into when you agreed to come. There is no one to hire. Mrs. Parker will have to take time away from her home and her husband to come help you. She has her own chores that need to be done and she can’t do them and work for us both. Nor would I ask her to.” David’s tone was firm but not angry.
“I see.” Her heart sank and she picked up her fork to poke at her food. What if she didn’t catch on? Would he send her home? They each forced down another bite of the casserole.
“Annabelle, I know this is a big adjustment for you,” David continued. “It is for most women, but life here is different and you’ll have to get used to it.”
She expected him to continue with the words “…if you want to be my wife,” but he didn’t and she buried her face in her hands. Could this get any worse? Her clothes would be ruined, her soft hands would develop calluses, and her days would be consumed with hard labor.
“I don’t expect you to do everything immediately but I do expect you to work hard and try, Annabelle.” He scooted his chair back and walked to her side. He put a hand on her shoulder and kneeled next to her. “I’ve worked hard for everything I have here. I did this all on my own. There wasn’t anyone to help me. You’ll see when we go to town how small it is. Everyone has a job to do out here, and that’s a truth you’re going to have to live with.”
Annabelle shook her head and tried to keep his words from sinking in. This isn’t what she signed up for. She and David were supposed to marry and have kids. She’d spend her days raising the babes and reading, not working her life away cleaning and cooking.
“I don’t know if I can.”
David stayed next to her for a long moment before he rose to his feet. “I think you can, Annabelle. In fact I know you can. The question is do you want to?”
Annabelle froze at his words as he walked back to his seat and sat down. She didn’t want to work, but she couldn’t return to her old life.
Annabelle awoke at the sound of clanging and banging coming from downstairs. She sighed and tossed the covers off. It was time to start another day. Hopefully it would be better than yesterday. Her belly growled. She needed something to eat.
David made it clear he intended for her to earn her keep here. She had fallen asleep with the thought that if he had accomplished so much on his own, she could, too. It was time to learn how to do the things he needed, and learning them was going to be difficult. She dressed and hurried downstairs.
“Good morning.” A woman greeted her with a smile. “You must be Annabelle. I’m Elaine Parker. My husband works in the field with Mr. Abernathy.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Annabelle said. She peeked into the kitchen. It was clean and tidy. The mess from yesterday had disappeared.
“Mr. Abernathy said you needed some help getting situated,” she said as she went to the stove and stirred something in a large kettle.
“Thank you,” Annabelle whispered.
“It’s a tough life we live here, and it’ll take some getting used to,” Elaine explained. “But it’s a good life, too. Good people and a good life out here.”
Annabelle nodded and felt she didn’t need to say anything. It would take a lot of getting used to. There was no arguing that.
“Where are you from?” Elaine asked.
“Philadelphia.”
“Yes, well,” she was polite and dismissive at the same time. “I’ll show you what to do today, and I have some time tomorrow morning, too. Then you’ll be on your own.”
“There really isn’t anyone to help out?” Annabelle murmured worrying her bottom lip. Maybe David had exaggerated.
“Afraid not,” Elaine sighed. “This life isn’t for the faint of heart. It might not be what you expected, but you’re one of the lucky ones.”
“Lucky?” she whispered. How was she lucky? She had chores and housework that she had to do.
“Yes. Count your blessings, dear. There are some women who come out here and discover a living hell. Men can be cruel, dear. Consider yourself fortunate. Not only is Mr. Abernathy well off, but he is a good man. He will take care of you,” Elaine said. She set a bowl on the kitchen table. “Now let’s get to work shall we.”
Annabelle nodded as she considered Elaine’s words. She supposed she could have it worse. After all she could be in Philadelphia with the pig her uncle intended for her. It was in her best interest to learn what she could from Elaine. Even if she didn’t want to.
The fragrant smell of chicken wafted out into the warm night air. David smiled as he walked up the steps and into his home. His belly rumbled. He was famished. It had been far too long since he’d had a good home cooked meal.
His mother had been a wonderful cook, but she had passed a few years back. His father had followed shortly after. That’s when he’d decided to come west and make a fresh start for himself. It was hard work, but it was paying off. He had a thriving farm and a beautiful future bride.
He shoved the front door open and peered inside. The table was set and steam billowed off the chicken and potatoes.
“Good evening,” he greeted Annabelle.
She looked up from the dish she was scrubbing and gave him a small smile before turning back.
“Come sit down and eat with me,” he invited.
“How was your day?” Annabelle removed her hands from the water and shook them off and wiped them on her apron.
“I got a lot done. How was yours? Did you and Mrs. Parker hit it off?” he asked conversationally.
“She helped me put a few things into perspective,” she answered.
“Oh?” he said as he took a large bite of chicken. It was perfectly moist and cooked to perfection. “She show you how to cook this chicken?”
“She actually cooked it, David,” she said. “But I helped. I have a lot of work to do.” A heavy sigh escaped her as she draped a napkin on her lap.
“There is,” he agreed. “But this is a delicious start, Annabelle.”
“I want to make a life here with you David, but I’m not sure that I can do everything as fast as you expected.” She bit her lower lip and played with a stray strand of hair. “There simply isn’t enough time in the day.” She met his eyes for the first time and let out another long breath.
“I see.” He swallowed hard. “Annabelle, I’m not lying to you. There is no one that can help. These things must be done, by you. I’m sure after some time you’ll find out how to manage your time effectively.”
“I’ve never done any work like this before.” Annabelle’s voice was so quiet he
struggled to hear her. “I don’t—”
“Look, I’ve worked hard every day of my life,” David interrupted. “The only person keeping you from accomplishing what you need to do is you. I don’t expect you to get it all done right away, but I do expect you to try your best.” Annabelle opened her mouth to protest but he shook his head.
“I’m not going to argue with you about this any further. In our letters I spoke about working out here. You knew what you were doing. We both need to uphold our end of things if we are going to have a successful life together. I like you, Annabelle, but please don’t ask me again about hiring someone.”
He took another bite of his chicken and savored the taste and hoped that this would be the last time she asked about this. He meant what he said. They finished their meal in silence and Annabelle excused herself to her room for the night.
Facing Storms
Annabelle stared down at the instructions Elaine had given her. She let out a long sigh. It had seemed so much easier when Elaine was helping. Now it all seemed overwhelming.
David was expecting a warm meal when he returned form the fields and she really didn’t want to let him down. He’d made his point clear last night. His words still rung in her ears. Even after all of her stubbornness he still liked her. He wanted to make this work between them. Her heart swelled a little at the idea. He was a good man and she wanted to do what she could for him, and for her. The only person getting in the way is you, Annabelle. The truth of his words pierced her.
The work was too much still and she had no idea how on earth she was ever going to get everything done, but she was going to try. That’s what he’d asked of her.
They were to be married tomorrow, and nervousness washed over her at the thought. Her dress wasn’t ready. That was the one thing she’d wanted to work on, but she simply hadn’t had the time. Even with Elaine’s help she hadn’t found the time.
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