To Every Love, There is a Season

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To Every Love, There is a Season Page 12

by Marissa St. James


  Ellen left her seat and went to the bed to inspect the clothes. The maid had pulled a few things from a stool. She ran her hand lovingly across a lawn shirt, turned and was about to leave with the bundle. “What do you have there?” Ellen rushed over and grabbed the clothes from the maid. Her actions felt like a childish tantrum, but she could not seem to stop herself. A shirt had a rent in one sleeve. Ellen glanced from the garment to the maid's knowing look. “I am quite capable of repairing my husband's clothing."

  "Well, Housekeeper told me to get them and I do as I am told ... my lady."

  Ellen noted the underlying disdain in the girl's reply. “Who are you?"

  "Catriona."

  Ellen studied the girl for a moment. Her dark brown hair lay in a long thick braid over one shoulder. Hazel eyes, a small upturned nose, and full mouth completed the pretty face. The dress she wore showed off more of her slim figure than Ellen thought appropriate for her station. Ellen felt a twinge of discomfort as the maid defiantly returned her stare. There was a hint of jealousy in Catriona's eyes. Was this girl the reason why David spent so little time with his own wife now? Ellen cared not for the direction of her thoughts and cast them aside.

  "Tell Housekeeper, I will be tending to my own sewing. She need not worry about Lord David's clothing."

  "As you wish.” Catriona gave Ellen a little smirk and arrogant curtsy, then slowly turned on her heel and sauntered out of the room.

  Ellen went to the door and closed it, disturbed by the knowing glance Catriona gave her before disappearing below stairs. Those wayward thoughts returned, creating a seed of doubt for David's fidelity. Perhaps some fresh air would clear her mind. Tossing her cloak about her shoulders, she climbed the steps to the top of the tower and stepped out on to the wall walk. A guard strolled by, giving her little more than a glance, and continued on his way. Ellen ignored him and concentrated on her reasons for being on the wall walk. The air was brisk, and refreshing, carrying the scent of pine on the wind. She wrapped her cloak tightly about her and looked up at the sky, at clouds so low, she imagined them to be just beyond her fingertips. Their steel gray color made her feel cold, like David's growing attitude toward her the last few weeks.

  She did not want to think of David as being unfaithful, did not want to face the fact her marriage might have been a mistake from the start. Ellen had loved David since she was a child, longer than she had realized. Never in all those years did she ever see anything that would lead her to believe he was untrustworthy. Why would coming home change him so much, or had she been so in love with him, she failed to see his true nature? Ellen's thoughts continued to chase one another around in her head until she was ready to cry out in frustration. To face the fact he did not feel the same about her, hurt more than she imagined, but Catriona's attitude seemed to hint something was going on. Ellen had no idea how she would handle the problem. She stiffened slightly as a pair of arms circled her waist and pulled her close.

  "What would bring my favorite lady up here to such a lonely place?” David felt Ellen tug sharply on the edges of her cloak, forcing him to release her. “What bothers you, Sprite? You seem as cold as the day. Has someone done something to anger you?"

  Ellen turned quickly and stepped away from him. She kept her eyes lowered and stared at his broad chest. How could she tell him of the doubts in her mind? Those, she quickly decided, she would keep to herself. “'Tis no more lonely here than it is in the rest of the castle.” Ellen closed her eyes and sighed. She did not want to argue with her husband. “I ... I still have not found a place for myself in your home."

  "Our home, Sprite. ’Tis yours as much as mine."

  "No. Despite the weeks we have been here, I am no more welcome now, than when we first arrived. Your people do not like your English wife, David. They never will. It does not help matters that you have kept your distance of late.” Angry words tumbled out of her mouth before she could stop them. “You enter our bedchamber long after you think I am asleep. No matter the time I wake, you are gone. You barely speak to me during the day. Many days, you say nothing at all. Certain things have been alluded to.” Ellen looked up into her husband's eyes, and caught a glimpse of simmering anger, before it was hidden.

  "What things?"

  "Nothing. I should not have said anything. I will find a way to deal with the problem myself."

  "Give them time,” he cajoled. “If anyone can convince them you belong here, I know you can do it."

  Ellen was taken aback by his attitude, as if he were trying to placate a stubborn child. “They do not need time, David. They resent your English born wife. How can I find a way to befriend them, when they are so hostile.” He does not know how they are, what they are doing, or could it be he does not care? It only happens when he is not around. I am caught between my words and his loyalty to his home and people. How do I make him understand what he does not want to see, that I'm not the frenzied new bride in a strange land? Mayhap better to say nothing at all. Ellen sighed softly.

  "How can anyone not love that fiery spirit of yours?” David's voice softened to a near whisper. “I know you, Sprite. You will find a way.” He held her tighter for a brief moment. “Come, it grows dark, and the wind has a bite.” He paused. “It shames me to admit I have been neglectful of you these past weeks. Why not have supper sent to our chamber? We will spend the evening alone, you and I."

  Ellen's heart felt lighter for a moment, at the admission. Could it be she had misread the circumstances, or failed to understand his meaning? Still, she stiffened at the hint of condescension in David's words, as if it were a simple matter to win over these folk. The Scots could be stiff necked when they refused to accept someone. Ellen relaxed again at the idea of not having to share him with his people, at least for a few hours. She shivered, whether from the cold or the thought of his attentions, she was not sure. She let him take her arm and guide her back into the tower. They took their time returning to their chambers, laughing and whispering, with only the stone walls to keep their secrets.

  They stopped in the long corridor, where David issued instructions to a servant, then he caught up with Ellen and escorted her the rest of the way to their rooms. Once through the door, Ellen paused, as David slowly removed her cloak and tossed it with his onto a large chest at the foot of the bed. “Forgive me, Sprite, there is something I must tend to, before we close ourselves away from the world, for the night.” David took a step backward, turned, then left her alone.

  Ellen remained frozen where she stood, then hurried across the room to stand near the blazing hearth. Her fingers were interlaced in a nervous gesture. Why did she feel as if this were her wedding night all over again? Why did his words on the wall walk still bother her? He was hiding something, of that she was certain.

  David had left the door ajar and it was now being slowly pushed open by a servant carrying a heavy tray. Ellen watched the servant silently cross the room and set his burden down on the small table before the hearth. He picked up a corner of the cloth covering the tray, and was about to remove it, but seemed to think better of it. Letting it drop, he barely nodded to Ellen and continued out of the room.

  Ellen waited patiently for David to return. The fire in the hearth burned low. She took the poker and stirred the ashes, rekindling the flame a little while longer. She peeked under the cloth covering the tray, but congealed gravy did nothing to enhance her appetite. She sighed, and climbed onto the bed, accepting the fact she was about to spend another night alone.

  She turned onto her back and slowly opened her eyes. Light cast from the bedside candle created shadows on the face hovering above hers. David's eyes were even darker than usual—if that was possible. A faint smile touched her lips as she lay, still half asleep. She was vaguely aware of his hands as they deftly loosened the ties of her nightdress. His kisses warmed her, as the hearth fire couldn't. Earlier cross words forgotten, Ellen welcomed her husband's embrace.

  * * * *

  Ellen awoke to a still dark
room, and an empty bed. She pressed her hand on the spot where he had slept, and found it cold. David had been gone for a while, or had he been there at all. She could not be sure if his appearance in their bed had been wishful thinking on her part, or a dream, or if he had truly returned, hours later than he'd promised. She held off her disappointment and rolled onto her back, pulling the covers up to her chin. Shoving the covers aside, she shivered in the cold room, then rose from her warm bed, quickly washed and dressed. Although she wasn't looking forward another lonely day, Ellen made up her mind to begin again and not let anyone's miserable attitude spoil her day.

  Ellen hummed a light tune as she entered the great hall to break her fast. Her smile brightened when she saw David, but faded again into a nervous frown when he gave her a curt nod. What had gone wrong between last night and this morning, that he showed no warmth?

  "Good morning, my lady. Did you sleep well?” David's words were polite, as if he were speaking to a guest.

  "Very well,” she replied, keeping her eyes lowered as she accepted the bread he offered her. She had no idea what was wrong. Had she, in some way, offended him or his people? She could not imagine how.

  "Saddle our horses.” David finished his ale. “I wish to take my lady riding."

  Ellen glanced at Muriel as the maid hurried to her lady's chamber to fetch her warmest cloak. One of the grooms went to the stable. A few moments later, Ellen followed David from the great hall, into the courtyard. A feeling of something unpleasant about to happen kept nagging at her, and she tried to ignore it. She wondered why several men-at-arms who had mounted up, were waiting for David to lead the way.

  Ellen was unnerved by her husband's silence, as they rode across the bridge, down the mainland hillside. If this was meant to be an enjoyable ride, the lack of conversation made it otherwise. They turned off the main trail, to take another through the woods. Branches scratched at her cloak and caught in her skirts. The horses’ hoofs thudded dully on the half frozen ground. This was certainly not her idea of a pleasant ride and she pulled one edge of her cloak across her body to block out the chilled air.

  Eventually they reached the edge of the woods, where it opened out into a browned meadow. Ellen's face brightened at the unexpected, but pleasant sight of her brother, Gordon. A familiar face from home pleased her, but the presence of thirty more soldiers took away her smile. She turned to her husband for an explanation, the stony look on his face made her hesitate. “David?"

  "You will return to Ravencliff with your brother.” His tone was cold and distant.

  "I don't understand, David.” Ellen turned her mount around and faced her husband. “Have I done something wrong? You have only to tell me, and I will do what I can to right the wrong."

  "I am tired of the servants’ complaints about you. You make no effort to know them and their ways. You make no effort to become a member of my clan. You are not the woman I thought you were when we married. I am sending you home to your father. I cannot be bothered with a woman who prefers to be alone. I am tired of you, Ellen. Go home."

  Ellen's mount moved closer to David's, and she lowered her voice. “You can say that after last night?” Her cheeks turned pink with embarrassment, at the thought of the night before. “Did last night mean anything to you? Anything at all?"

  David's stallion sidestepped nervously. “It surprises me you remember anything, but you were available. I had need."

  Ellen's face grew crimson with anger. “Was not your little maid available to satisfy you?"

  "That is not your affair. Be grateful I do not hide you away in another castle and forget you. At the least, you can return home and start over. Perhaps you would be happier with another of your former suitors?"

  Ellen knew which suitor David spoke of, and it made her sick to think he could believe she would prefer Nicholas over her husband. If that was what he wanted, so be it. “I tell you this, David. You may send me home now, but I will ‘never’ forgive you for this.” She glared at her husband a moment longer, turned her mount and set it to a gallop. She would never give David the satisfaction of seeing the pain he caused her, or the tears she fought to hold back.

  "Ellen, wait,” Gordon called out and approached David.

  The Scotsman reached into his cloak and brought out a letter, which he handed to Gordon. “See your father gets this. It will explain matters as they truly stand. Under no circumstances, is Ellen to know the truth, at least not before she returns to Ravencliff."

  "Jonathan! Michael!” The soldiers moved forward in response to Gordon's call.

  "Escort my sister back to Ravencliff and see my father gets this letter.” Gordon watched as Jonathan tucked the missive into a pouch at his belt. He sent both soldiers on their way, then turned to David.

  Gordon mumbled to himself, as he watched his sister and her escort ride away. How does he do it? It is as though he is unaffected by what just happened. He moved closer to David and spoke to his brother-in-law. “That was a difficult thing you did, David. Are you sure it is the only way to deal with this situation?"

  David stared into the distance, watching Ellen ride away, her back straight and stiff. His eyes shown with pain at what he had been forced to do to his beloved Sprite. “You will never know how difficult, but you know your sister. She would have insisted on staying, and I could not allow that. I can only hope that one day, she will understand and forgive me."

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  Time painfully dragged by and several weeks had passed since David had completed what he considered a despicable deed. He took a bite of the meal set before him, then pushed the trencher back. His appetite was gone, along with his wife. He felt like the most contemptible man in Scotland, for treating Ellen as he did. It did not matter that her safety was foremost in his mind. He doubted she would ever forgive him for sending her away as he had done.

  As if reading his friend's mind, Gordon leaned over and clapped David on the shoulder. “Do not worry about Ellen, brother. When she gets over being angry, she will realize you had good reason for what you did."

  "Will she? I did not want to hurt her, but I could see no other way to make her leave willingly. There are times when a woman's loyalty is a great disadvantage."

  "Never let Ellen hear you say that," Gordon chuckled. “She would believe you want her loyalty only when it is convenient for you."

  David winced at the remark and slumped back in his seat. He glanced up at Gordon, doubt showing in his eyes. “You heard what she said before she rode away. Do you think she would ever forgive me?” David did not appreciate Gordon's chuckle at his own discomfort.

  "Who can tell with my sister?” Gordon paused. “You said the McDougals consider her a prize to be gained at any cost. Do you not feel there may be someone else behind this plot? From what you have told me about this band, they do not have much sense between them. I, for one, do not think they could plan anything on their own. I believe someone else is behind this, but why go after my sister? We both know what would become of Ellen should they get their hands on her. You did the right thing sending her home. In time, she will understand."

  David took half-hearted notice of Gordon's momentary distraction to Catriona's approach. She refilled their goblets, then turned and sauntered away, casting a glance over her shoulder as she left. Gordon grinned and watched the way her hips swayed enticingly. Seeing where Gordon's interest was focused, David had no doubt about what was going on in the English knight's mind, and found little about the situation to be amusing. Gordon might find some time to enjoy himself while he was here, but now was not the time.

  David braced his hands on the table and pushed himself out of his chair. He leaned toward his friend and quietly advised, “That is something you do not want to play with. She is known for cheating on her husband, and once she climbs into your bed, you will have a very difficult time ridding yourself of her.” David was satisfied with Gordon's surprised look, and straightened. “It is time we saw to our defenses."

&n
bsp; * * * *

  David and Gordon stepped into Alexander's private chambers to find the man already there, working on plans to defend their home. David understood why these McDougal men were known to give no quarter. They were a rogue band living deep in the highlands, and while there was no love lost between them and the Rosses, David had to wonder what had stirred up this latest discontent.

  "Father, have you completed your plans?"

  Alex looked up at the two younger men and ignored the question. “Ellen is safe at Ravencliff?"

  "Angry, but safe, yes,” David replied guiltily.

  "Had you been honest with her, there would be no problem between you."

  "Had I been honest with her, father, she never would have left, would, in fact, have insisted on staying. She would never have understood or accepted the danger she was in."

  "I like that young woman. I hope you will make amends when this is over.” Alex glanced up from his map and did not like the downcast look on his son's face. “What is it?"

  "She has vowed never to return. I fear my marriage may be over before it has had a chance to become strong."

  Alex cleared his throat but said nothing more. Only David knew the best way to handle the situation, and facing the pain he caused by forcing Ellen to leave was more than enough to deal with. “There is work to be done. The McDougals are not clever enough to get past our defenses. We would do best if we met them on the field, beyond the bridge, keep them from our front gate. A dozen bowmen will be stationed in the parapets, another dozen in the courtyard. We are only vulnerable at our main entrance. The loch at our backs will prevent anyone from approaching from that direction. The cave entrance leading to the dungeons is underwater most times. We should be able to make short work of this threat.

  "David, you and Gordon will lead the men beyond our walls. I will take charge of the men in the courtyard. Be ready to come to our aid if the McDougals should prove they have more aid than we anticipate.” Alex smiled tightly as the young men nodded their understanding and left to assume their assigned duties.

 

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