by Moly E. Lee
“Let me get you a new drink,” Randy said, ignoring Fynn’s question.
“Thanks.” I set the half-spilled bottle on the counter.
“Fynn?” Katy placed her perfectly polished fingers on his shoulder and I swallowed hard.
“Right,” he said after finally breaking his stare with mine. “Cosmo?” he asked her and she nodded. He followed Randy to the other side of the kitchen and I immediately darted my eyes around for an escape route, the awkward tension wringing my insides out. A quick scan of the kitchen showed me Hendrix—my only other ally—had vacated the area in search of new people to sucker out of their snacks.
“You were so right about Fynn,” Katy said, leaning against the counter next to me and speaking in a hushed tone like we were old friends. “He actually remembered a fund-raiser I did last year.” She shook her head, her blonde waves tousling in the perfect hair commercial tumble. “I didn’t know there were guys out there like him.”
I snorted but quickly covered up my laugh with my hand. “There aren’t any guys like Fynn. He’s…” The words died in my throat. There was no way to explain all the ways in which he was incredible.
She pursed her pink lips, her eyes darting from me to Fynn across the kitchen. As Katy returned her focus to me, I felt like a bucket of ice water had been dumped over my shoulders. There was a clarity in her eyes I never wanted anyone to see.
“Oh,” she said as if I’d silently answered a question. “You’re totally in love with him,” she whispered.
I forced out a laugh, but this one was so fake compared to the previous one. “Please.”
She tilted her head, pure confusion in her eyes. “Why even try to hook us up?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. “I really have no idea what you’re talking about, Katy. He likes you. He’s my friend. That’s why I told you about him.”
“You’re sure?” she asked. “I don’t want to get in the way of anything.”
Ugh, does she have to be nice? Like couldn’t she be the vapid girl I’d assumed she’d been since middle school? It would be so much easier.
I wanted to say there was nothing to get in the way of, that she was seeing things that weren’t there, but I couldn’t. In truth, I wanted to pull Fynn aside and admit everything I’d ever kept from him.
“You want him to be happy?” she asked when I hadn’t answered.
“Always,” I said just as the guys returned to us.
“Interesting,” she said under her breath.
“What is?” Fynn asked, handing her a red cup.
I took my drink from Randy, fastening a smile to my face.
Katy glanced down at her cell. “Donna needs a powwow,” she said, smiling at me and then Fynn. “I’ll catch you in a little while, cool?”
Fynn nodded, and to her he probably seemed super nonchalant about it, but to me? I could see the anxiousness weaving across his features—the tightening of his fingers around his cup, the slight shift in his stance, the hard swallow before the sigh.
“Don’t go anywhere,” Randy said, touching my shoulder before pointing across the dance floor that was just outside the kitchen. “I see my little brother about to make an ass out of himself. I’ll be right back.” He hurried off and my shoulders dropped. I liked him, but I didn’t want to lead him on either.
It took me all of two seconds to realize I was now alone with Fynn, and there might never be another shot to tell him the truth. My skin tightened, and my hands instantly grew slick. I glanced upward, catching his profile as he stared off in the distance, my heart racing like I had run one of his track meets instead of just standing here.
“Fynn,” I said, reaching out to touch his wrist. Sparks tingled from the touch, my fingertips dying for more contact than just an innocent brush.
He blinked a couple times before quickly facing me, his eyes lighting up. He scooped me in a hug, spinning me around excitedly. “You are so amazing!”
“I am?”
My breath caught in my throat as he set me down, squeezing me one more time before releasing me. What? Elation filtered through my blood, making me practically dizzy—or that could’ve been the spinning he’d just done to us—but still. Did he finally realize I’m the one for him?
“Yes,” he said, smoothing back some of my hair that had gotten rumpled by his bone crushing hug. “No one surpasses you.”
Hope filled my chest so much I thought it might burst out in the form of happy tears or a cheesy song and dance. So this is reciprocated love? Visions of my happily ever after with Fynn raced through my mind—college, road trips, an endless adventure.
“Fynn, I’m so—”
“I don’t know how you do it,” he cut me off, not hearing me start to agree how much I was in love with him. “You seriously rock. Katy and I had a great conversation in the pool, and she’s really starting to open up to me, you know? I’m seeing her for who she is, not who the class and her clique make her out to be.”
A sharp needle burst every balloon in my chest. Pop, pop, pop. The air went out of me as fast as it had come in, and it effin’ hurt. I choked back a sob, feeling like an even bigger idiot for allowing myself for one second to believe he’d finally seen me.
“That’s great,” I lied, clearing my throat to try to keep it from cracking.
He took a drink, smiling at me. “I owe you, big time.”
I nodded a little too quickly and didn’t stop until I realized I probably looked like an insane woman ready to be shipped off to the asylum. “I, ugh,” I said, already walking away. “Have to, um…” Wow, this is the most brilliant you’ve ever been.
“Braylen!” Zoey’s voice had never sounded sweeter. I whirled around, latching onto her concerned face as her eyes jumped between Fynn and me. I hurried over to her, not bothering to say good-bye to Fynn. If I had, I would’ve started bawling.
“Oh what the hell?” she snapped when I reached her, and she wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me into the same room Randy had changed clothes in. She slammed the door shut as I sank onto the bed. “What happened?”
I took a few deep breaths to calm down. Smacking my hands against my thighs, I chuckled darkly. “Exactly what was supposed to happen. I told Katy about Fynn and now they’re falling for each other.”
“No way,” she said, sitting next to me. She rubbed her hand up and down my back. “They are completely different. And…” She sucked her teeth. “You two would be perfect together.”
I shook my head, unable to respond.
“Bray,” she said softly. “You have to tell him. He can’t possibly know how you feel about him. If he did—”
“I was about to,” I cut her off, swinging my hand toward the door. “Right before you saw me, but then he started talking about Katy and how freaking perfect she is and how well they’re connecting.” I swallowed hard. “Zoey, he looked so happy. Like a freaking kid on Christmas.” The knife twisted a little harder in my heart. “And who am I to stop that? Damn it, Katy is even being nice to me.”
“Bitch,” Zoey said and I laughed out loud. She smiled at me.
“Thanks,” I said. I’d totally needed that.
Zoey bolted off the bed. “This is wrong. You deserve to be happy. And he deserves to know the truth.”
I jumped up, tilting my head at her. “Zoey?”
She raised her chin just a fraction. “I’m only doing this because I love you.” She turned toward the door and I reached out, grabbing her arm to stop her.
“Wait, what?” My heart raced against my chest, threatening to crack it. Zoey was the ultimate problem solver—especially when they weren’t problems of her own. When she set her mind to something that needed fixing, she wouldn’t stop until she deemed it solved.
“I’m going to help you, Bray. Take the pressure off. I’ll tell him for you.” She tugged on my hold but I kept my grip firm.
“You can’t do that.” I was out of breath at just the thought.
She sighed. “You’re right
. You should be the one to tell him. It’ll mean more.”
I shook my head. “He wouldn’t believe you, anyway.”
“Want to make a wager on that?” She didn’t break my gaze and I made the switch from unbelieving to downright begging.
“Please don’t do this to me. I can’t…we can’t…he’s happy about Katy. That is his one wish for tonight—for our last high school party.”
“Braylen, don’t you get it? This is your last chance to tell him. You have no idea which college he’ll choose and as your best—girlfriend, I won’t let you go halfway across the country to Northwestern wondering what if?”
I dropped my hold on her, the fight going out of me. “I told you, I tried. I’m done torturing myself, Zoey. I’m just…done.”
“You can’t be done until you’ve done everything in your power to grab your happiness. And you may hate me right now, but you’ll thank me later. You have until midnight tonight,” she said, wrapping me in a hug I didn’t reciprocate. “Find a way to tell him or I will.” She released me, and for half a second I thought about locking her in the guest bathroom for the rest of the party.
Instead, I glared at her. “You’re evil.”
She shook her head. “You’re getting off easy.”
“Oh yeah, sure. Finding a way to admit my love for Fynn in between him sucking face with Katy seems wicked easy.” I rolled my eyes.
“I’m doing this to help you, Braylen.” She sucked in a deep breath, rubbing her palms together. “Now, Gordon, on the other hand?” Her eyes got that calculated look to them.
“What the hell was that about anyway?” I asked, when she didn’t elaborate.
“Well—” A vibrating sound cut her off and she fished out her cell from her pocket. She jolted after reading the text, her wide eyes flashing up to me. “I have to go. The schedule for this is tight. Sorry.” She turned but stopped on the first step. “I’m setting an alarm with your name on it, Bray. Midnight. If I find you and Fynn still doesn’t know? He will ten seconds after then. Understood?”
I shook my head, my mouth grasping for words my brain couldn’t come up with. She gave me a nod and rushed out the door.
Sinking back onto the bed, I raked my fingers through my hair. One second I thought my mission for Fynn was complete, now Zoey had enlisted me in a battle I’d never wanted to fight—one where my heart was at risk, right alongside the only other thing that mattered to me, him.
I took a fast glance at my cell. My stomach dropped and fluttered at the same time.
I had four hours to tell Fynn something thirteen years hadn’t been enough time to tell him. The clock was ticking.
In four hours—either by my own mouth or Zoey’s—Fynn would know the truth.
And just when I’d given up, too.
How in the hell did this become my Friday night?
After taking a good five minutes to shake off the shock of Zoey’s ultimatum, I found my way back to the kitchen. I spotted Fynn easily, as if my body was attuned to his presence—a pulse of heat that happened whenever he was close. He and Katy were back to chatting on a love seat in another sitting room that was off the kitchen.
I hopped onto the counter, taking up my usual perch. I didn’t have a clue how I could meet Zoey’s demand—Katy was at his side for good tonight—and trying to force myself between them seemed more daunting than writing a puff piece during a dead news month. And I honestly wanted him to be happy. Maybe I’d just leave it to Zoey and wash my hands of all of it.
“You two used to date?” Randy asked, drawing my attention to the fact that he stood close enough to put a hand on my knee, which hung over the counter.
“Me and Fynn?” I shook my head and took another drink. “Nope.”
“His loss.” Randy tapped his plastic cup against my bottle. “How was graduation?”
I shrugged. “The salutatorian’s speech was unique.” I chuckled at the inside joke, wondering where Zoey was at that exact moment and almost pitying Gordon and the hell he’d pay soon—if she’d given me the tell Fynn the truth ultimatum out of love, then I couldn’t imagine what she had planned for him out of hate. Though, he had gotten himself into the situation.
I straightened my neck, looking over Randy’s massive frame to see if either of them was in eyesight. I thought I spotted Zoey’s blonde hair through the large window overlooking the makeshift dance floor that separated the kitchen and the room with Fynn and Katy—who I was avoiding looking at on purpose.
“I pranked mine,” Randy said.
I feigned shock. “What did you do? Jump from the rafters during the final speech?”
He laughed, the sound hearty and inviting. “Something like that.”
I arched an eyebrow at him.
“I did a backflip off the stage during the principal’s address of the senior class. After I’d stolen the fedora off his head.”
I chuckled.
“All while wearing a Jason Voorhees mask.”
“You did not!” I covered my mouth again, trying to hold in the obnoxious laugh I’d been born with.
He shrugged, a proud of himself grin on his face. “People still talk about that stunt.”
My eyes widened. “How long ago was it?”
“Two years.” I sighed, glad he wasn’t a decade older in a young looking body.
“And then you went to Sierra Nevada?”
“Yup.” He didn’t sound entirely thrilled about it.
“Do you hate it?”
He chuckled. “It’s not that.”
“What is it, then?” I asked when he hadn’t continued.
“College is more something I do to appease the parents.”
I’d heard people say that before, but I wasn’t one of them. I couldn’t wait to get to Northwestern. “What would you rather be doing?”
“Can’t you guess?” he teased me.
“Professional sky-diving trainer?”
He laughed again. “No, but that doesn’t sound like a bad backup.”
“Nitro Circus?” I guessed again.
He snapped his fingers, pointing at me. “I wish. Maybe if I’d started my stunts a little earlier in life.” He shrugged. “I’ve got a knack for doing stunts on video, making people laugh, that sort of thing.”
“I can see how that would be hard to fit into a major.”
“Right?” He took another drink.
“Maybe you could study filmography or video design or something. At least then you’d have something in your arsenal to apply to what really interests you.”
He tilted his head at me, grinning. “Did you really just graduate? You sound like an advisor.”
I held my hand over my heart. “Swear. Today was graduation. Though I think I’ve been ready to go to college since I was ten. At least that’s what Fynn says.” Mentioning Fynn forced the smile from my face and I took a deep breath to steady the ache in my chest.
Randy took my silence as an opening to launch into what seemed like an endless supply of crazy-stunt stories worthy of their own YouTube channel, and the longer we talked, the more I forgot about Katy and Fynn sitting in my line of sight doing who knew what.
I wouldn’t look that way. I would not torture myself anymore.
Instead, I let myself relax as Randy recanted tale after tale of broken bones, busted noses, and school suspensions all in the name of a rush.
He made me laugh. And it felt good when the night had produced nothing but regrets and anxiety over how to get Fynn alone and hold his attention long enough to tell him how I really felt. Either that or just let it go and give Zoey free reign to out me at the end of the night.
Glancing at Randy, enjoying the easy air he had about him, guilt settled gritty in my stomach. I liked him, but as no more than a friend, and I didn’t want him to be reading me wrong.
“You have something…” Randy reached up and pushed back a stray piece of my hair, showing me a tiny piece of fuzz that he quickly tossed over his shoulder. The motion had brought him cl
oser, almost between my legs on the counter but not quite. I tried to breathe, but he was so close.
I wasn’t used to having any guy this close to me—unless I counted Fynn, but he’d never looked at me the way Randy was looking at me now…like he wanted to take a bite out of me. But it made me feel more awkward than desirable. I was sure in that moment if I kissed Randy, he wouldn’t put up a protest. In fact, I was certain he wanted me to end the space that separated us, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was somehow, again, betraying Fynn by even taking notice. Plus, what kind of person would I be if I used him to get over the years of unreciprocated love I’d suffered from Fynn?
“Randy,” I said, placing my hand on his chest to gently nudge him backward. “I’m sorry, I can’t…”
He sighed, his eyes going over me and landing on Fynn. “It’s him, isn’t it?”
God, am I that transparent?
I spared a glance over my shoulder, Fynn’s blue eyes locking with mine seconds before he focused solely on Katy. “Yeah,” I admitted, turning back to Randy. “I’ve been in love with that boy for longer than I can remember.” With everything that had already happened tonight, and Zoey’s ultimatum, I figured I owed Randy a truthful explanation. Nothing short would explain why a single girl like myself wasn’t swooning over an exceptionally nice guy like him.
“Have you ever told him?”
I shook my head. “I’m not what he wants.”
“How do you know?”
“I just do,” I huffed. Why couldn’t people believe I knew my best friend better than anyone else? If he wanted me, he would’ve shown it, not gone after Katy.
Randy moved closer to me again, and I tilted my head. Had he not understood a word I just said?
“Trust me,” he said. “This is going to drive him crazy.”
I chuckled nervously, my cheeks flushing. “It won’t. I promise.”
“He keeps looking over here every five seconds,” Randy said, his voice completely innocent, but the way he was leaning into me totally not.
“Because he’s my friend. He wants to protect me from big college guys like you.”
He laughed, and the tension left me little by little. “Just trust me,” he said. “I’m officially taking up the position of your wingman.”
