by Thomas Hall
“What do we do?” Cassie says.
I don’t know what gets into me. Whatever it is, I regret it almost as soon as the words are out of my mouth. “How the hell should I know?” I say. I shout. “Why has it got to be me who decides? Why can’t you think, for once in your life?”
She looks at me and I can’t tell whether she is going to cry or start shouting as well.
I decide not to wait around and find out. I walk away from her, up the stairs, to find somewhere that I can be alone.
I skip the rooms we slept in last night. There are plenty of others to choose from.
I close the door behind me and stand in the middle of the room. I try to calm down, but I can hear the helicopters getting closer. I need to figure out what we are going to do.
I want to give up
Whatever Bushe was planning to do with us, can’t have been as bad as this.
I open my eyes. Sigh. Sit down on the floor.
I wish that I had learned how to meditate.
A gentle tapping on the door. I look up as it opens, expecting to see Michelle. I am relieved that it is actually Harriet.
She closes the door behind her but doesn’t come towards me.
“Are you okay?” she says.
I shake my head. “I don’t know.”
Harriet steps away from the door and walks over to me. She sits down and crosses her legs. She reaches out and I let her take my hands like she did as a baby.
“You’ve gotten us this far,” she says.
“We’re trapped in a house surrounded by the Infected and soldiers,” I remind her.
She nods. “But we’re also safe from Cortez and Bushe. We’re not dead in a helicopter crash. The Infected haven’t eaten us.”
“At least two of those are dumb luck,” I say.
She shrugs.
I know what she’s trying to do, but they say that even if you know it’s a placebo, it can still be effective.
“You’ll do the right thing,” she says. “I know you will. We all do.”
“Even Cassie?”
Harriet looks uncomfortable. I am immediately sorry that I brought her mother into the conversation. They are trying to build a relationship and I should stay out of it.
“I’m sorry,” I say.
“It’s fine. Cassie is… she’s different.”
I want to ask her what she means, but now isn’t the time. If we are going to do something then we need to do it quick. The helicopters will be here soon, along with the soldiers they contain. If we sit around talking about her mum then we won’t have a choice about what happens next.
I take a final deep breath as if I am about to free dive, and then stand up.
I offer Harriet my hand and when she takes it I pull her to her feet.
“Come on,” I say.
“Where are we going?” Harriet asks.
I shake my head. “I don’t know.”
She follows me across the room and out the door. Even if neither of us knows where I am planning to take her.
CHAPTER 5
THE HELICOPTERS HAVE LANDED. PEOPLE IN UNIFORM CLIMB out. They are carrying guns and wearing helmets. It looks as if they are preparing for a siege. Harriet, Michelle and Cassie are standing behind me in the kitchen.
“What can you see?” Cassie says.
I take a final look at our enemy and go back inside.
“We can’t get out that way,” I say.
I walk past them, through the kitchen and into the next room. I’m not sure what to call it. With no furniture it could be a dining room or a living room, or something else. Their shoes make heavy clomping noises as they follow me.
“Wait here,” I say.
None of them argue.
I open the front door and step out.
I stand there for a moment contemplating our options. Trapped between the military and the Infected. Neither of which is something I want to face. If I have to pick one which should it be?
Time is ticking. If I don’t make a decision soon then the soldiers will arrive. No decision is still a decision. If I am not prepared to face the Infected then I may as well wait here for the soldiers to catch us.
I step back into the house.
“Come on,” I say. “Have you got everything you need?”
They nod. They are reluctant to leave, which I understand. But they do as I say and, one by one, they join me.
Michelle hands me my pack. There is nothing in it except food and water.
There is a gap of about a hundred metres between the house and the nearest fence. It is not the way we arrived and on the other side I can only see forest.
I lead the way, Michelle behind me, Harriet and Cassie behind her.
I reach the fence first. There is no gate and we can’t climb over because of the barbed wire. I look both ways, but can’t see a way through.
“Over here,” Michelle says. She is about twenty metres to my left. The nearest Infected is about a hundred metres past her. I can’t tell whether they have noticed us yet, but I have to act as if they have.
I hurry over to Michelle. Harriet and Cassie follow me. We reach the gate but, before we can go through, I hear the soldiers behind us.
“Stop!” The voice comes from a loud speaker and is devoid of emotion. I can’t even tell what gender the speaker is.
The fence rattles. The Infected have heard them as well.
I look back at the house and see more of the soldiers coming through.
“It’s not safe out there,” they say.
“Go” I say to Michelle. “Come on, go!”
Michelle goes through, followed by Harriet and Cassie. I take a final look back at the soldiers before going through last and closing the gate behind me.
The forest covers everything. A thick canopy of leaves obscures the sun, but lets light through in jagged slits that burn my eyes. There is a roughly hewn path of dirt which will be gone in a few years, and somewhere nearby there are the Infected.
Michelle takes point, leading us away from the house as quick as she can manage. I glance behind, but the winding forest path soon makes it impossible to see where we have come from. The forest has engulfed us.
I can hear the irregular movement of leafs and fallen branches snapping under feet. A low hum that I haven’t heard since the night Bushe and Phillip died. I don’t know whether the soldiers are following, but I am sure the Infected are.
The only way I can keep track of the time is by measuring how exhausted I am.
Michelle is slowing down and I guess she is close to exhaustion as well. Adrenaline has been couring through our veins for so long now that we have gotten used to it. It no longer provides the burst of energy we need for long term fight or flight.
As we continue to slow I push my way to the front of the group until I catch up with Michelle.
“Which way do we go?” she says.
The path has opened up into a clearing. I can see the pale blue sky through the middle of it. This is the kind of place where people make their last stand, but I am not ready for that yet. I am not prepared to die here.
I look around and I can’t see any of the Infected. I can hear them, though, so they are close. The wrong choice now might lead us into their path and we can fight, but not win.
“This way,” I say. We go left because it offers the shortest distance across the clearing. I have nothing else to base my decision on.
Michelle doesn’t question me because she has nothing better to offer. I take the lead and we cross the open ground.
We make it into the forest on the other side, but get no more than twenty metres before I hear a short, sharp scream.
I turn. Cassie and Harriet have stopped.
I look at them, but their wide eyes don’t even seem to see me.
“What is it?” I say, pushing past Michelle to get back to my daughter and ex-wife.
Harriet raises a hand and points.
I look.
An Infected boy is partly hi
dden behind a large bramble bush. He doesn’t look as if he’s moved recently, so I guess that I ran straight past him without noticing. He is about Harriet’s age. He looks at us but doesn’t make a sound.
Without taking my eyes off the boy I reach for Harriet’s hand. She tries to push me away but I am insistent. I start to pull her after me.
When she starts to move the boy opens his mouth. I have seen Infected before. I know that the virus does something to their vocal chords that makes it impossible to speak. I still expect to hear words. Instead he moans, and I know something terrible is going to happen.
A moan answers him.
And then another.
Soon the only thing I can hear is the Infected moaning.
They seem to be coming from all around us and getting closer. The boy has called them to us.
I don’t know which way to go, but I don’t intend to still be here when they arrive. This is not the time to give up hope.
I grab Harriet’s hand and pull her away.
The others follow.
We make it a few feet before the first Infected bursts out at us. An old woman who moves with surprising speed. She might not have been capable of moving so fast when she was alive.
I push her away. She trips over something and falls.
Harriet screams again and when I look back I see a pool of blood beneath the woman’s head. My first thought is that she won’t trouble us any more. My second is to wonder when I became so calous.
We keep moving and more of the Infected come for us. They are all ages and genders. Their clothes are rags, hanging off them and covered in blood. Some of them aren’t even wearing clothes. A man with a fat gut comes running towards us, his junk flapping around and slapping his mouldy skin.
The Infected are quick, but our fear of them makes us quicker. I keep running, dragging Harriet behind me, hoping that the Infected don’t have more stamina than we do.
They growl at us. Calling others to join the hunt. There is not enough of us to go around, but the Infected seem to be enjoying the pursuit.
“Fuck off!” Michelle shouts.
I turn and see her pushing an Infected woman away. The side of her top is missing and I can see her flesh rotting around a nasty wound.
The woman keeps coming and Michelle keeps pushing her away.
I keep hold of Harriet but go back towards Michelle. Together we are able to push the Infected woman away and when she hits the ground this time, she doesn’t get back up.
I take Michelle’s and drag her away. Cassie is on her own, but I’m out of hands and have no choice but to let her fend for herself.
I keep my eyes on the rough path ahead of us.
“Keep moving,” I say. I am not sure whether I am talking to myself or them. We are all exhausted, but stopping now means death and I do not want a pack of cannibals to eat me. I don’t want the to eat my daughter.
The path comes to an end and we push our way into the thick of the forest. On the ground there are things that exist only to get in our way. Tree stumps and surface roots. Broken bottles and tins.
We keep going.
It seems to take hours to reach the end of the forest. When we burst out into the day, I am not sure whether it is to our advantage or not.
We are on a street. The houses are old, a mish-mash of different styles that don’t go together at all. They don’t look safe.
“Come on,” I say. I am doing my best to rouse their enthusiasm but there is no one to raise mine. Would they keep going at all if I wasn’t there to encourage them?
The Infected come out of the forest when we are fifty-metres down the road. I turn to look at them once but find them even more horrifying in the daylight. I pull Harriet and Michelle after me and Cassie brings up the rear.
“You’re limping?” I say as Cassie hobbles past me.
“It’s nothing,” she says. It isn’t like her to be brave about something like this. When we were married she complained unceasingly about the most minor ailment. She couldn’t have a cold without broadcasting it all over the internet.
I shrug and keep going. The Infected are closing the gap between us, which suggests they have better stamina. We can’t turn to fight them, because we have nothing to fight with. Our only choice is to keep running. Or as close as we can get to running.
The thud-thud of helicopters is a timely reminder that it isn’t only the Infected that we have to worry about.
“Over there!” Harriet says.
I turn to where she is pointing and see cars parked by the side of the road. I can see from here that the tires are still inflated. If we can get the engine started, we will be able to drive away.
It is one way of gaining some distance from the Infected. Although I doubt it will do us much good against the helicopters.
We hit the first car running. It shakes and threatens to roll over but remains on all four wheels. We all reach for the doors at the same time and find them locked.
“I’ll break a window,” Michelle says. She already has her arm pulled back ready to strike.
I grab hold of her and she stops. “You’ll cut yourself. We’ll try the other cars first. If they’re locked as well then we’ll use a rock.”
She nods, seems to see the sense in what I’m saying and then we all move onto the next car. It is also locked. The next car we try, a bright blue Ford Focus, opens.
I glance back and see the Infected have gained on us.
“Everybody in,” I say.
They get into the car and I walk around to the drivers door. It opens and I climb in.
Force of habit means I am cautious as I pull out of the narrow space. I check my mirrors and see the Infected coming up the road after us. I doubt they have the sense to get out of the way if I drive at them.
I pull away and after a few seconds the Infected are disappearing in the rear view mirror.
“Watch out!” Michelle screams. She is sitting in the passenger seat. The noise startles me.
I slam on the breaks.
We narrowly avoid hitting the Infected man who is standing in the middle of the road. He is naked from the waste down, mud covers his body but does little to disguise the proud staff between his legs.
He grins at us.
Before he can do anything else, I reverse, turn and drive around him. He doesn’t follow.
CHAPTER 6
WE DRIVE FOR MORE THAN AN HOUR BEFORE any of us feels able to speak. The roads are empty, but I struggle to believe that the Infected won’t attack us the moment I glance away. If not them, then a helicopter will land in front of us and soldiers will appear.
“I’m going to be sick,” Cassie says.
I glance in the rear view mirror. She is sitting behind the drivers seat with her knees pulled up to her chin. She looks pale and there is a thin layer of sweat across her brow. The last thing I need is for her to come down with something.
“Do you want me to pull over?” I say. I am reluctant to do that either, but I should show some compassion.
“No. It’s fine.”
“Are you sure? The last thing we need is your vomit stinking up the car.”
“I said, I’m fine,” she says.
I shrug.
Michelle puts a hand on my leg and I turn to look at her. I can’t work out from her expression whether she’s telling me to lay off Cassie, or something else. I shrug.
We keep going.
The empty roads soon lead to more built up areas. I am reluctant to drive into a city, but I am even more reluctant to go back.
“How are you doing Harriet?” I say.
I turn to look at her and she shrugs, which I’m pretty sure means she’s getting closer to being a teenager than not. It seems like only last week that she and I were alone in the world. Now she has her mother back and… and whatever Michelle is.
“Everything’s going to be okay,” I say. I don’t know it, but the look on her face suggests that she needs reassurance, whether it is real or not.
> She shrugs again.
“Evan?” Michelle says.
I turn to look at her.
“The road,” she says. There is no anger in her voice, not even concern. She sounds as if she’s on the verge of falling asleep.
I look at the road. There are no other cars and no people. We are coming up to the town so the roads are likely to become narrower and more clogged with traffic.
Soon the tall buildings are looming over us. The silence of the place is eerie. It reminds me of London when I first arrived after leaving the evacuation camp. There is no sign of life here, but in London there turned out to be a thriving crime scene.
It might have been better to stay in London. At least there the channel separated us from the mainland.
My intention is to drive straight through the city without stopping. I don’t like the place and have no wish to be stuck here for a minute longer than necessary.
“Stop here!” Cassie says.
Her voice startles me. “What for?” I say. I don’t slow down at all.
“There’s a supermarket. We can get food.”
My stomach rumbles at the mere mention of food.
“Evan stop,” she says.
“It might be dangerous,” I say.
“It’ll be fine,” she says. “We need to eat.”
I glance at Michelle, who shrugs in response. Harriet doesn’t get a say in it.
The military is unlikely to be hiding in an abandoned supermarket, but the Infected might be. It could end up getting us killed. But, if we don’t eat we will definitely die.
I slow the car down and execute a rusty three point turn. Without a word I drive back to the supermarket and stop in front of it.
Michelle and Harriet go to open their doors.
“You two are staying here,” I say.
“Why?” Michelle says.
I nod towards Harriet. “It’s too dangerous. If anything happens, you two can still get away.”
“Without you?”
“Without me.”
I can tell that Michelle doesn’t like it, but she doesn’t argue with me. I’m sure that, if she tried, I would let her do whatever she wanted. But, she takes her hand off the door and leans back in her seat, content to let me make the final decision.
