by R. M. Healy
Anton took in a deep breath as he sat on his couch.
His mind was going crazy. He'd never felt so aroused in his entire life. It had been months since he'd had sex, and he'd only masturbated a few times, and his fantasies at that time were purely based on Essie.
Now she was naked in his bath. Her skin was wet, and her breathing ragged as she saw his excitement.
He needed to calm down, and he couldn’t even release himself because Essie was just in the room next door to him.
It was selfish of him to be thinking about such seedy thoughts when she was only there because she wasn’t well. Before her accident, he had plans to keep his distance.
They would be work colleagues and nothing more. He hadn’t planned to pursue her in any way, but after seeing her so vulnerable in that hospital bed, he wanted nothing more than to care for her.
His head fell against the back of the sofa, and he rubbed his forehead with his hand. Once she was better, he would never be in this kind of situation with her again.
Because if they were, Anton knew neither of them would be able to avoid the sexual chemistry that was becoming stronger every time they were around each other.
Essie may not like him, but there was no doubt she wanted to fuck him. He sat there for a short while, trying to ignore the subtle splashing of the water from the bathroom.
His mom had texted him back saying she’d picked up all the food he’d asked for and would be back soon. Using his online banking, he transferred his mom more than enough money to cover the bill and more.
“Anton?” He heard Essie’s soft voice call from the bathroom.
In the short time he’d been in the other room, he’d thankfully managed to control his urges, so he was ready to go back in there. Or so he thought.
When he saw her Esther standing there, the white towel a complete contrast to her wet inky hair, which fell beneath her breasts, all his rational thoughts almost went out of the window.
“Where are the pajamas?” she asked, looking confident despite the fact she wore nothing but a towel. It was no wonder she was, with her long legs and hourglass shape.
He turned around and picked up the pajamas from the chest of drawers outside of the bathroom, and walked toward her.
“Is that all?” He asked, eyebrows raised, so close to her he could see the freckles across her small nose.
“Yes, thank you,” she said, raising her own brows and smiling at him.
“Food should be here soon. You get changed, and I will come back in if you’re still feeling unsteady.”
“It’s ok. I feel a lot better now.”
Anton nodded and walked out of the room, she did look a lot better, but he still didn’t want her to be left alone. He set up the TV and unbuttoned his shirt.
Usually, he’d be comfortable in a pair of underpants or naked, but since Essie was here, he’d find something more appropriate. His mind was elsewhere when he undid his belt, and Essie walked in.
“Oh, I didn’t realize you were changing, sorry,” Essie said awkwardly, standing in the doorway in his clothes which were far too big for her.
As Anton looked at her, he saw what her eyes were looking at. He was an idiot not to cover it. Nobody but the doctor had seen it since the fire. But the last thing he was going to do was hide now she’d already seen it.
Let her think what she wants, he thought.
“Done staring at it?” He turned to look at her head-on, hands on his waist.
“That’s it?” She said, sauntering towards him.
He didn’t move or say a word, waiting to hear her pity.
“You know, if anything, this makes you more attractive.”
Anton was taken aback when her soft fingers slowly traced the lumpy puckered skin from his hip to his pec, all the way to his neck, where he’d kept his face bandaged.
How could she touch it? Even Anton couldn’t bear to touch his scar, and here she was, casually stroking her fingers across it. Anton wouldn’t have believed her words if he didn’t see the way her nipples puckered against his T-shirt, and her tongue flicked across her lips.
The same tightness in his groin returned as she continued to touch him, her hazel eye’s looking up into his own.
“You’re still turned on by me,” Anton stated, knowing she was without needing to ask.
“Yes. These scars,” Essie said, biting her lip as she ran her hand over them again, “make you hotter. I think they make you more manly.”
“Anton?!” He heard his mother's voice from outside of his living room door in the other room, and Essie immediately stepped away.
“Will you answer that while I get changed?” He asked with a harsh voice as he turned to get a t-shirt from his drawer.
“Yeah, sure,” her own voice was shaky, and he knew she felt the same as him. She shut the door behind herself, and he let out a heavy sigh.
This was too much. It was a lot easier to be around Essie when he knew she wasn’t attracted to him. Now, it was clear she wanted him just as much as he wanted her. And the fact she was looking at him like that, despite his burns, was a revelation.
He could his mother chatting away to Essie and knew he’d have to show his face before she barged in the bedroom.
After quickly changing, he grabbed Essie’s tablets and walked into the living room to see his mom messing around with his TV as Essie sat on the sofa, a cushion on her lap.
“Yeah, you must watch this week’s episode. I can’t believe you missed it last week!” His mother said as she put on the reality TV channel she loved, “Anton won’t mind. Anyway, if you need anything, call my cell. This room is too far from mine to hear a thing.”
His mother put the remote on the couch beside Essie before wishing them goodnight and leaving the room.
“Sorry, I didn’t ask her. She just put it on,” Essie said, shrugging her shoulders.
“Leave it on,” he picked up all the paper bag and went and sat beside Essie on the small sofa, “I don’t care what we watch.”
The greasy burgers and fries smelt delicious, and Anton saw Essie’s face light up when he opened the bag and passed her the food she’d been craving. He put the handful of sauces between them and took out his own food.
“Oh my god!” Essie said, opening the wrapper and using ketchup to put on it, “I have been dying for this since this morning.”
Seeing her bite into the burger like some feral animal made Anton burst out laughing. She really did want that burger.
“I never knew you loved junk food so much,” Anton said, laughing.
Essie turned her head and looked at him as if he was crazy.
“Want mine too?” He joked as she took another bite of the burger.
She slapped his arm gently and frowned, continuing to chew the burger. As the show about housewives came on, he began eating his own food, occasionally looking at Essie.
“What? She was the one who went behind her back first!” Essie exclaimed as she sat eating her fries, looking at the TV. No wonder his mother and Essie got along. They both really liked their reality TV programs.
“Here, take these now,” Anton said, passing her the tablets she needed. She barely looked away from the screen as she put them in her mouth and washed them down with her cola.
The longer they sat there, just relaxing and watching TV together, the harder Anton found it to understand his feelings for Essie. At some point, after he was laying back onto the armrest, Essie had begun to drift off. Her head slowly moved onto his shoulder, and Anton ran his fingers through her long hair.
The tablets clearly had a strong effect, so he picked her up and carried her to his bed. As he lay her there and pulled the duvet over her, she didn’t once wake up, and he had a chance to just look at her, really look at her.
She was beautiful, kind, and reliable. And entirely too good for someone like Anton. It would be delusional for Anton to think that the two of them could ever be anything serious.
He walked into the living roo
m and turned the TV off before getting comfortable on the couch where he would be sleeping. Thinking of what would never happen between him and Essie.
Chapter Fourteen
Anton made sure he was out of the bedroom by 6am that morning. His mother was more than happy to sit and read her books, so he could go to work with his father.
His father took on some of Essie’s duties that day with Anton’s help, and Anton was really beginning to see what a big part of the business Essie was.
It seemed she had almost as much power, if not more, than his father. Anton didn’t think he could have any more respect for Essie this morning until he went to work.
Every other restaurant manager seemed genuinely concerned she was off work since it was such a rare occurrence. The business wouldn’t be where it was if it wasn’t for her. That much was evident.
It was almost 4pm by the time he and his father were on the way back home, and his father began to speak to him in Italian.
Since Anton knew he would be going to Italy for at least three months, he really needed to speak the language fluently.
“When will you be returning to Italy to discuss the layout for the plans?” His father said.
“I can go over as soon as possible. In fact, Sebastian has offered to fly out with me Monday to help with the planning and whatnot. He’s got a lot of experience with property redevelopment.”
“Fantastic. I think if the plans get accepted quickly, which I believe they will, then I will manage the work here, and you and Esther can fly out by next month. What do you think?”
Anton looked out of the window at the passing countryside. Would Essie be able to come?
“I think Essie may have other priorities. What do you think is going on with her father?” Anton asked.
His father didn’t answer straight away. Anton could see his father was thinking of the right thing to say.
“I have my suspicions, but that is for Esther to tell us.”
They both remained quiet for the rest of the journey home, what Anton’s father said was right, it was up to Essie to tell them what was going on in her personal life, not for them to speculate.
“Can you let your mother know that I am going to collect Mr. Lee and his family?” His father asked as he pulled around the statue of Isabella.
“Yeah, sure, cya,” Anton got out of the car and waved his father goodbye as he watched the car drive down the drive. He waited outside in the bitter cold, just looking around at the only home he’d ever really known. The last few weeks he’d really began to appreciate living at the old farm.
Just one year ago, the idea of living back here would have horrified him. Now his whole life had changed, and his parents were leaving the country within the year.
He had enough savings to buy the farm outright from his parents when they moved and was seriously considering doing so.
The house was too big for one person, but that didn’t matter. It was where his little sister had died, and despite the fact he wasn’t a spiritual person, it didn’t mean he felt comfortable having anyone else live there. When the front door opened behind him, he was surprised to see Essie standing in the doorway, the heat reaching him from inside the door as he stood in the cold.
“Hey, want a hot chocolate? Maybe tea?” She said, standing with the white gown wrapped around her and a pair of fluffy white socks.
That image of her waiting for him as he got home, with no makeup and smiling at him, it made him sad that it would never happen again.
“No thanks,” he said, walking in closing the door behind him, “how are you feeling today?”
“Much better, thank you,” she said, standing in front of him. He nodded in response, wanting to get away from her.
“Is my mother in the kitchen?” He said, stepping away from her.
She nodded and looked wary of his sharp tone. He felt terrible, but he needed to keep his distance from her if they were ever going to work together professionally.
“Thanks. Oh, and my dad’s picking up your parents now.”
Anton walked through to the kitchen where his mother was making dinner.
“Smells fantastic,” he said to his mom as he wrapped an arm around her to say hello.
“I am glad you think so,” his mother smiled continued to stir the sauce in the pan as she spoke, “Can you get the wine from the cellar?”
“Of course.”
As he opened the old wooden door down to the cellar, he walked past Essie, who was collecting the cutlery from the draw, the bandage still on her head. He had to take his off to show the word his mutated skin. He wondered if he ever would feel comfortable in his own skin again.
Throughout the day, he’d thought of Essie’s reaction and still found it unbelievable that she hadn’t turn around in disgust like he did every time he saw it.
After picking the wine from his parent’s vast collection, he left it at the table and went upstairs to his room. He managed to stay up there taking calls and sending emails, avoiding Essie. Until he saw his father pull up on the drive to the house with Essie’s family.
He had never really got to know her family that well and wondered what her relationship with them was like. When he saw Essie walk out of the house into the cold still in her dressing gown to embrace her mother and sister, he shook his head, so much for resting and taking it easy.
By the time he’d gotten downstairs, the four guests had already made their way to the kitchen beside Esther and the dark-skinned handsome nurse who’d been with her father at the hospital the other day.
“Peter, this is Anton,” she said, introducing him to the man who looked more like a model than a nurse.
“Nice to meet you, Peter,” Anton held his hand out to the man, not willing to show his jealousy.
“You too,” the other man said politely, taking Anton’s hand.
Essie and the other man stayed where they were, and Anton began to feel uncomfortable. Clearly, they had something to talk about alone. He nodded and walked into the other room, angrier than he thought possible. How could he feel so jealous when he had no right to be?
“Anton?” Essie’s mother said, “Esther’s father wondered if you and he could go outside? Until the food ready?”
Anton looked over at Essie’s father, sitting in his wheelchair beside the backdoor, staring at Anton.
“Sure.”
He walked through the kitchen and over to her father, who still sat watching him.
“Mr. Lee, hello, you wanted to talk?” Anton said, unsure of whether he should ask Mr. Lee if he wanted the wheelchair pushing.
“Yes.”
The older man attempted to stand, and Anton automatically held his arm out and helped pull him out of the seat.
“Thank you. I wanted to be on my feet when we spoke. That way, we can talk man to man. Let’s go outside.”
Anton knew it was freezing, but he didn’t want to patronize the man by asking if it was wise to go outside in his condition. He opened the door and led the man out where the snow had begun to fall again over his parent’s patio.
The grounds were beautiful in the summer, with an array of flowers, trees, and even a lake at the back of the property.
“How has my daughter been since she left the hospital?” The man asked, slowly walking down the pathway to where the pond had frozen over.
“She’s recovering well. I think she’s needed a break for a while, if I’m honest. It’s just a shame it took this accident for her to have one.”
“Yes. My Esther has always been a hard worker, always has to be doing something.”
Nodding, Anton heard Mr. Lee let out a whimper of pain. Anton deliberately sat on an old stone bench by the large pond. He didn’t want to make the man walk any further.
“Has she told you that I am dying?” Mr. Lee asked casually, sitting beside Anton, looking around the grounds.
Anton was taken aback at his words and couldn’t believe what the man had just said.
“You know s
he and I just work together? She doesn’t tell me anything.”
The man laughed and shook his head, looking at Anton, a smile on his old face.
“No. I do not know that. When I saw my daughter thanksgiving, I could see that she liked you. I know my daughter very well, and she is rarely nervous. My wife reads a lot of those trashy magazines, some with articles about you in fact.”
If his mother read and believed those magazines, that meant she probably thought of him as some crazy sex addict, drug-taking spoilt millionaire. Those stories were only elements of the truth and never accurate. Especially not anymore.
“I didn’t want to believe those things, so I didn’t judge you or my daughter's clear liking toward you. What I could judge was how you behaved at the hospital. You like my daughter too, don’t you?”
“Yes,” Anton simply said. There was no point lying to the man since it was true.
“This heart failure, it’s going to kill me soon. And my daughter, strong as she may be, is struggling, I see how skinny she is becoming, the bags under her eyes.”
That was something Anton saw too.
“I hate to ask this of you, for it hurts my pride. But I know you care about my Esther. Will you be there for her when the time comes? And your family?”
Anton was at a loss for words. He wanted to keep his distance from Essie, and here her dying father was asking for him to look after her.
“I promise,” Anton replied.
“Thank you. And Anton?” The man said, struggling to stand.
“Yes?” Anton asked.
“If the time comes and I’m not here to say yes, then I give you my permission to ask her to marry you.”
Esther looked at the back door again. They’d been gone for at least ten minutes, and she was beginning to get anxious. What could her father and Anton possibly have to talk about?
“You fancy Anton, don’t you?” Her sister innocently asked as she sat beside her on the long table.
Although her mother was talking to Anthony and Rosa, she knew Peter was listening to the conversation. He’d conveniently sat in front of Esther at the table.
“Anton and I work together. He’s a nice guy,” Esther simply said. She had no idea how she felt about Anton, so she certainly couldn’t begin to explain it to anyone else.
