by Mary Eason
“I realize you may still be in mourning, even if I can’t understand why, but you were lucky enough to find your Mr. Right. Some of us are still out there looking for that perfect man. The rest of the world didn’t stop living just because Cade chose to kill himself, you know. I mean, I have needs, even if you have stopped caring about your own. Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a single man in Denver these days? Especially one who’s both wealthy and attractive. Brody has everything. He’s perfect for me.”
Why Jenna felt it necessary to have Reyna act as matchmaker with Brody in the first place she couldn’t understand. After all, Jenna had never had any problem asking a man out in the past.
Reyna couldn’t tell Jenna that the very thought of seeing her cousin with Brody was enough to make Reyna physically ill. Brody was starting to occupy way too much of Reyna’s thoughts lately, and if she had an ounce of sense left in her head, she would have refused his offer straight out instead of agreeing to it so easily.
“Tell me again why you need me to be involved in this little scheme of yours, Jenna. I mean you’ve never been shy about going after a man -before. Why don’t you just do it yourself?”
The sigh that greeted those words had Reyna searching for a chair. Obviously, this was going to be a long conversation if Jenna’s tone was any indication.
“Reyna, I told you—Brody’s not the kind of guy who likes a woman to go after him. From everything I’ve heard about him, I’d say just the opposite is true.”
As hard as she tried, Reyna couldn’t keep from laughing at the image of Jenna pouring over some folder containing all the little details of Brody’s personal life.
“Laugh if you like, but I know what works with men and what doesn’t, and I know what will work with Brody.”
That was certainly true enough. Jenna had gone through more rich, sophisticated, and eligible men in the past year than Reyna could keep track of. Which was why Reyna couldn’t understand out of all men Jenna had gone through, none had fit the bill as Jenna’s perfect guy?
“Because they were all missing that certain something Brody has.” Jenna went on to answer Reyna’s unspoken question a little too graphically. “You know that sexy, seductive attraction of his. Not to mention that smile…”
Reyna rejected Jenna’s words and the image her cousin had just created without considering it. She couldn’t think of Brody like that. Brody was her friend. That was all he could ever be, because she did not intend to go down that road again.
Just like everyone else who knew her, Jenna believed that Reyna had been hopelessly in love with Cade James. Although there were times, like now, when Jenna suspected something wasn’t quite right.
In the beginning, all of those things had been true. Or so Reyna believed. She’d just been too young and naïve to realize the truth.
There were times when Reyna wasn’t sure whether to laugh or scream at the utter irony of the way things had turned out.
Once she had believed in the fairy tale. When she and Cade met and married in just one week, she believed she was crazy in love with him. That was before she’d discovered the truth about Cade’s addictions. Before she’d learned of his violent behavior brought on by the drugs he abused. Before she learned, there was nothing about the real Cade James that came close to the fairy tale she’d believed in the beginning.
Cade had married her on a whim. One, which he quickly regretted.
Now all of that seemed like a lifetime ago. Another girl. She wasn’t the same hopeful girl who had married Cade.
It was only after the changes in Cade became more frequent and more dangerous that she finally accepted the truth. Their marriage had been a terrible mistake. By that time, Cade was so deep into his destructive behavior that Reyna wondered if anything could have saved him.
Whatever she thought she felt for him disappeared completely the first time he’d hit her. For the remainder of their marriage, Reyna felt nothing more than pity for the man she’d once believed she loved.
She’d tried to talk Cade into getting help, but on those occasions, he’d only become more angry and abusive until finally, Reyna was forced to watch as her husband self-destructed into an existence of living off drugs and alcohol. And then there were the affairs. Too many to remember and too much to care about anymore.
Reyna never really understood why Cade had married her in the first place. He’d told her he loved her at least a dozen times that first week. Even after they had separate bedrooms, he still claimed to love her. In her heart, Reyna believed Cade never really understood love.
He had just been caught up in the physical attraction. He’d simply desired her, so he’d convinced himself that he was in love with her. In his irrational way of thinking, that made sense.
That had been the reality of Cade’s behavior in the months before his death. Irrational. He hadn’t understood that love wasn’t supposed to hurt.
Looking back now after surviving that nightmare, Reyna knew that at twenty-three, she too hadn’t understood love. She’d only been in love with idea of love. The whole fairy tale image it represented. An image Cade had deliberately wanted her to believe existed because he’d desired her physically. Unfortunately, after a while, Cade hadn’t been able to fulfill that desire.
Cade had swept her off her feet. He’d been so charming and attentive, that Reyna ignored all the warning signs that had to be there even before their wedding day.
The truth was she’d never actually been in love with Cade James. It had all been just an illusion. Everything about their life together had been a lie.
The day Cade brought her home to meet his father was one Reyna would never forget. Harvey James hadn’t even put up a pretense of being polite. He’d made it clear to his only son that Reyna would never be a part of their family. He’d insisted they get a divorce immediately, which Cade had refused to do. His father accused Cade of marrying her to get back at him. They’d gotten into a terrible argument and she and Cade had left soon after.
In Harvey’s mind, Reyna lacked the right pedigree, the correct social connections for such a prestigious family. Coming from a small town outside the city, she was definitely from the wrong side of the tracks, so to speak.
Cade had almost seemed happy with his father’s disappointment. He’d told her that growing up, his father had been cold and unfeeling. In some way, Reyna believed that Cade had wanted to punish his father for all those things. He’d accomplished it quite nicely by marrying Reyna, someone who Harvey James would never approve of and certainly never accept as his son’s wife.
“Come on, Reyna, you owe me and you know it. I was the only one to stand by you after Cade’s death. I mean all those questions by the police…the accusations by Cade’s father. It was quite a scandal for me as well.”
Of course, it would be pointless to argue the truth of that statement. Jenna’s loyalty had come only out of a need to protect her name, in spite of what she would have the world believe. Preserving the family’s reputation was definitely important, as far Jenna was concerned.
Sure, Jenna had stuck by her in the terrible days following Cade’s fatal car accident when her father-in-law was determined to blame Reyna for his son’s death.
It had been Brody who made those days bearable. Brody’s visits kept Reyna from going out of her mind with fear.
“Jenna, just let me think about it for a little while, okay? I’m not even sure if he’s seeing anyone right now. Give me a little more time.”
“But you said you were seeing him tonight, right?” Jenna went on in her usual manner, totally ignoring Reyna’s uncertainties. “He’s helping you move out of the apartment, right? Why not feel him out a little about the possibility?”
As far as Jenna knew, Reyna was moving back into her grandmother’s old house in Silverton. In all the times she’d talked to Jenna about the move, she’d never once been able to tell her cousin that she would be moving in with Brody. Of course, Reyna knew she would have to tell Jenna and
soon before one of her cousin’s rich, nosy friends leaked it out. Unfortunately, Reyna knew exactly what her cousin’s reaction to that news would be.
“Look, I’ll think about it, Jenna—that’s all I can promise. I really have to go now—I still have tons of packing to do.” She replaced the receiver without waiting to hear Jenna’s response. She’d had enough of Jenna and her ridiculous demands for one day.
Reyna glanced around the apartment cluttered with moving boxes. Eight months she’d shared this home with Cade. Eight months of mostly bad memories. Eight months of watching while Cade sank deeper into the life of drugs and deceit until that final night, and the last tragic scene of their marriage. The final argument that had taken place in this very kitchen before Cade had walked out in a fit of rage and never returned.
The drugs found in his car at the time of the crash and later, in Cade’s blood system were ruled the cause of the fatal accident.
All the proof needed as to why Cade had failed to even so much as slow the car’s excessive sped as he neared the intersection.
The officer who came to the apartment that night to tell her about the accident said Cade probably hadn’t even been aware of the light when he’d ran it at more than sixty miles an hour.
There was no indication he’d tried to break, reinforcing the police officer’s belief that Cade’s reflexes had been so impaired by the drugs and alcohol, that he never even realized what was happening until it was too late. The Mercedes slammed into a family of four killing them on impact, along with Cade himself and leaving his father, Harvey James, one of the wealthiest and most powerful men in Denver, alone.
Even today—three weeks after the accident—Reyna still couldn’t bring herself to go near the kitchen. Maybe some things never truly died. The memories of that night certainly hadn’t. There were times when Reyna wondered if she would ever be able to put Cade and that night in the past.
It hadn’t helped that Harvey had been determined to blame her for Cade’s problems. Harvey tried to convince anyone who would listen, including Brody that the drugs, which had caused Cade’s death, belonged to Reyna.
Even though Brody managed to talk Harvey out of pursuing those accusations, Reyna had only wanted to leave Denver and her past behind.
She was planning on moving back to her grandmother’s small house in Silverton but Brody talked her out of running away.
He’d pointed out the obvious. Running away never solved a thing. All she would be doing was adding more fuel to Harvey’s accusations.
“If you run away from this now, Reyna, you’ll be answering it for the rest of your life. Is that really what you want?”
“No, of course not but what am I supposed to do, Brody? The apartment belongs to Harvey. I can’t stay here. I need to find a job and—”
“You can stay with me.” That had been so unexpected, that Reyna couldn’t think of a single logical reason to refuse him.
“Brody, I can’t do that.”
“Why not?” he’d countered, forcing her to search for a valid reason other than, I’m deeply attracted to you and if I move in with you, I don’t know how long I can remain strong.
“You’ve been so good to me since Cade’s death. I need to start looking out for myself. You have your own life to live, and I would only be in the way.”
“Reyna, I have this huge house that I rarely use because I spend most of my time at work. Trust me, you wouldn’t be in the way, and you’d be doing a huge favor. Someone should get some use out of the place. It would be nice having you around—to keep an eye on things.”
To keep an eye on things? Not exactly what she wanted to hear.
The whole idea had been so crazy, that Reyna had refused to discuss it any further. Brody let the subject drop for the moment, but he hadn’t given up. He’d insisted she would be helping him out by moving in. Of course, Reyna didn’t believe a word of what he’d told her but she did owe Brody an awful lot and if he wanted her to stay with him, then how in good conscience, could she refuse?
That had been over a week ago, yet Reyna still couldn’t bring herself to tell Jenna about it. She hadn’t really been sure why until today. After Jenna’s earlier accusations, she knew exactly what her cousin’s reaction would be.
Jenna would take that as positive proof that Reyna was interested in Brody as more than just a friend. Nothing could be further from the truth, could it? Brody was a wonderful guy and a truly good friend, but that was it. Friendship was all that could ever be between them. Reyna wasn’t interested in anything more with Brody, or any other man for that matter. She couldn’t. Not after Cade.
Chapter Three
The second Reyna opened the door and saw Brody standing there, she knew she’d just made the second biggest mistake of her life.
The first clue came when the sight of him practically knocked the breath right out of her, right before it hit her again just how sexy Brody truly was.
“Hi, I’m sorry I’m a little late. Traffic…” When Reyna could only manage to stand there looking up at him, hopefully without her jaw dropping, she saw that smile appear. The one that started slow, at the corners of his mouth and spread into a beautiful grin that crinkled the tiny lines around his eyes and took her remaining breath away.
“Can I come in?” It took another full minute or longer for it to hit her that he’d actually asked her something. It was embarrassing enough to be standing around gawking at her husband’s best friend. Even more, that she hadn’t heard a single word of what he’d just said.
“I’m sorry?” The words came out sounding something along the lines of a really bad Daffy Duck imitation to which she was blessed, or cursed depending on your opinion, by the sound of his laughter.
“Well, I was hoping you were actually going to allow me to come inside, instead of standing out here in the hallway like some teenage suitor.”
To that far-too-close-to-home-for-comfort statement, Reyna backed into the apartment and held the door open.
“Sure…of course, I’m sorry. I don’t know that I was thinking. Come on in, I’m just finishing up.”
“So are you ready for this?” Reyna turned back to look at him, uncertain of what he’d meant. It was as if the sight of him had taken away all coherent thought.
“I’m sorry?” Jeez, were those the only two words she knew how to say?
“I mean are you okay with leaving this?” Brody waved his hand to encompass the apartment and it finally clicked what he was talking about. “I know it must be…hard for you, Reyna. Leaving the home you and Cade shared together. Are you going to be okay?”
“Oh…” Of course, he was only thinking of Cade. “Yes…that is, I will be okay. I just want to get this over with. You know, put it all in the past.”
Probably not what any loving wife would be saying about the life she’d shared with her husband, but it was the best Reyna could attempt in the way of an answer. She couldn’t tell Brody the truth. That in the last eight months of Reyna’s life, the only thing she didn’t want to put in the past was him.
Brody stepped closer making Reyna only that much more aware of him. Of all the little things about him that drew her to him, even while sending warning signals throughout her far-too-aware-of-him body. She fought the urge to back away.
He stood in front her, those incredibly gentle blue eyes searching hers just before one hand reached up to touch her hair.
“I know it’s hard. I know you don’t think you’ll get through this, Reyna, but you will. It just takes time. You’ll see. You have to give yourself time to heal. In time, the pain won’t hurt so badly. Maybe someday, you’ll even be able to love again.”
Those words coming from Brody was enough to guarantee it would never happen. His words made her realize just how impossible that dream would ever be. At least for her. Cade had been a mistake but that realization had come too late. And now, standing close to Brody and feeling the way she did about him, made her that much more aware of all those things. Against her
will, Reyna wondered what it would be like being loved by someone like Brody.
Impossible, that’s what. Hadn’t Cade told her more times than she could even remember anymore just how impossible that was? Brody was not the marrying kind. His life revolved around the company he’d created. Everything else came second to that. Not that there hadn’t been any lack of women wanting to change that, at least according to Cade.
Brody dated some of the most beautiful, glamorous women in all of Denver. What made Reyna think that someone like her, lacking all those qualities, could make Brody change his mind?
“The boxes are through here.” Reyna stepped away from Brody and was finally able to breathe again. Those all-seeing blue eyes hadn’t missed a single thing about her nervous retreat.
If Brody were close to guessing why she’d needed to put space between them now, he chose not to acknowledge it. Why would he? She was nothing more than his best friend’s wife.
“You’re all set then?” Brody asked casually as he followed her to the bedroom she’d used after she and Cade gave up on the intimate part of their marriage. After the first few months, Reyna and Cade had never shared a bed again.
“Are you sure you don’t want to take anything else with you?” Brody asked once again when he surveyed the three boxes neatly stacked on the bed.
He had no way of knowing that the very thought of remembering this place was almost as painful as her marriage had been.
“No. No, Brody, I just want to put it all behind me. I need to focus on the future and finding a job. I don’t want to be a burden to you.”
Reyna saw his reaction immediately. He hated her words. She hurried on before he could deny them. “I know you’ve told me I won’t be in the way, but, Brody, that’s not really the truth. You need your space. I mean, after all, you are single and…” She’d been so close to saying handsome and desirable when she’d caught the words and turned away again.
