by Amber Stuart
Unhooking a weapon harness, the guard shrugged out of his thick coat.
He handed it to Ledi with obvious reluctance.
Then he shuffled out the door with the rest of them, pausing only to give Nihkil a hostile look, one that may or may not have been about his coat.
As the opening closed behind him and the last of the guards, Ledi tapped the cane, his face showing an open irritation. He looked Nihkil full in the face then, and I saw what might have been an involuntary smile. When words burst out of him, amusement warred with that irritation, almost in equal amounts.
"You crazy piece of Rulikki dung," Ledi said. "Are you trying to age me prematurely?" He threw the coat on the bed, within reach of Nihkil’s hands. "I thought she was to go with the morph delegation. Did you not say that to me? Did you not expressly state that the two of you should not be seen leaving together?"
I stared at Nihkil, then back at Ledi.
"She was to go with them," Nihkil admitted. "But she––"
"Doesn’t listen," I finished for him. I held the covers up, fighting my way to a sitting position. "Great. Was the bomb yours, too?"
Ledi’s eyes widened. "No! Dakota... for the love of the great beyond!"
Nihkil touched my arm. "We knew it was a risk. Contingency."
The apology in his eyes mollified me only slightly.
"So who did do it?" I said. "Morph rebels? Crazy religious fanatics?" I felt my mouth tighten. "Nik said the Malek might be attacking. Was that just more bullshit?"
Ledi waved a ring-adorned hand.
"Not a far-fetched theory, really... but no, we no longer think it was anything so serious. We are not ruling out a testing of our defenses by the Malek, of course... possibly via hired civilian contractors, since they would never use their regular forces for such a thing. We feared the whole thing might be a diversion, which is why our own military went on high alert. At least six different groups have claimed responsibility, including a radical splinter group from Mydora... and, of course, the morph rebel, Zarwin...”
Ledi shifted his gaze back to Nihkil.
"In any case, it is no longer safe for either of you here, that much is clear. I went over all of the lines of security, Nik. They definitely had someone in the guard helping them."
"You still think the Council is involved?" Nihkil said emotionlessly.
Ledi made an affirmative gesture. "And you?"
Nihkil winced, sitting up. He pulled the coat over his shoulders, shoving his arm into a sleeve without looking at Ledi.
"She needs clothes," he said.
Ledi smiled faintly. "I had actually noticed that. Yulen is on her way... ostensibly to take Dakota to your family. I have a ship waiting on civilian side. I told them two hours."
"Is Mai-rhani okay?" Nihkil said.
“She is fine.”
Nodding, Nihkil started pulling himself over the cushions with his feet. When I caught his arm, he tensed, looking at me. “What?”
"What are you doing?" I said.
His expression grew puzzled. “You heard us discuss this just now. Ledi will take me to the docks, via shuttle. You will go to Yulen to meet with Mai-rhani. We will meet at the ship...” He hesitated at my deepening frown. "What?"
"Minimal security?" I said, trying to think.
Nik made a confirming motion with his head, somewhere between a shrug and a nod.
"Yes,” he said. “It must seem like an ordinary transfer."
I nodded, but found I wasn’t really listening to his answer, even though I’d asked the question. Instead, my eyes focused on his bare shoulder. A white, thin-edged scar I'd never noticed started at his neck, disappearing beneath the borrowed coat to make its way down his back. The mark appeared pale with age, stretched from where he’d grown. A fresh bruise lived over it, along with what looked like a burn.
Hesitating a last time, I met his gaze.
"I want to go with you, Nik," I said.
"Dakota." Nihkil’s eyes showed him at a loss. "No. It’s not safe for us to be seen together right now. Not until they catch whoever did this."
I shook my head. "Look. I don’t want to argue... and my reasons aren't going to make any sense to you. I want you to trust them anyway, okay? Just do this for me. Please."
I could see the “no” on the tip of his tongue.
Then Nik hesitated, as if thinking before he let himself speak.
When the pause stretched, he touched my cheek lightly with one hand.
"Can you try to explain?" he said, his voice subdued. "Is this an intuition of some kind? Or is there another reason? Something you don’t want to tell me?"
Feeling my face warm at the way he was looking at me, I shook my head.
"I don’t know,” I admitted. “That depends on what you mean. I just don’t like this."
I glanced at the door. Ledi continued to gaze tactfully at his shoes, hands folded.
Wavering between asking for his help and asking him to leave us alone for a minute, I ended up doing neither. I turned back to Nihkil, still speaking English.
"Look," I said, trying a different tack. "If I was back in Seattle, and I was about to go on a job and I felt like this, I wouldn't go. I flat-out wouldn't. So just... don't go alone. Take me with you.”
“Dakota...”
“Nik, I’m asking you to trust me. There’s got to be some way to make it safe... a back route. Maybe we could travel outside the compound... where no one would see us.”
Seeing the horrified look rising to Nihkil’s eyes at my last suggestion, I shrugged.
“Or we could wait a day,” I said. “Whatever."
Ledi cleared his throat.
I turned before I'd thought about it, staring at him.
There was no way he could have understood me.
I’d been speaking English, and I hadn’t opened the channel that would have allowed him to translate. The longer I stared at him, though, the more sure I was that Ledi had understood me. The realization made my heart beat harder, almost a panic-type reaction. I couldn’t really explain it to myself, though, so eventually I looked away.
Nihkil had followed my stare towards Ledi and the door.
His expression held an open puzzlement now.
"Dakota,” Nik said, looking back at me. “I told you we might have to leave like this, if security was breached. I told you this on the ship. They will close the docks. They will be looking for us together. My lock is still not open. Even if it was... I cannot hide myself for that long, not injured. Nor fight as effectively."
I nodded, knowing all this.
When he started moving away, I sat up, letting the blanket drop as I slid my arms around his neck, melting my body into his. For what felt like a long couple of beats, neither of us moved.
Then I raised my head, peering into his face.
My chest hurt as I continued to look at him, more so when he didn’t look away. Rather than pushing me away, he wrapped his arms around my back, staring at my face until I lowered mine, pressing my cheek against his.
“Nik, please,” I murmured. “Please do this for me.”
I felt his confusion worsen.
Before I could think of what to say next, he leaned closer to my ear, even as he switched to the implant.
"Dakota." His body turned liquid against mine. I felt desire waft off him, tentative but clear, questioning. "Dakota." His fingers wound into my hair. "Dakota, if this is an attempt to manipulate me into doing what you want, it’s cruel.”
Shaking my head, I slid my hands under the coat.
"Nik, I’m not trying to mess with your head,” I said. “I just don’t want you going with those guys. Not alone. I’m asking you not to, okay?” Gripping his hair in one hand, I met his gaze. “You want me to trust you. Well, you need to trust me, too.”
He drew back, staring at me.
Seeing the expression rising to his face, I frowned at him in return.
; "For crying out loud,” I said, exasperated. “I'm not trying to manipulate you, Nik! I'm trying to keep you safe. It's not me I'm worried about. It's you."
When he shook his head, starting to pull away, my fingers found the pendant he'd given me, the one I remembered only then that I still wore around my neck. I gripped his good arm before he could rise, showing the necklace to him.
"What does this mean, Nik?" I said aloud, in English. "I mean exactly... what does it mean?"
He gave me a blank look. "It means I belong to you."
I swallowed, nodding. "Okay. Then if you belong to me, you have to do what I say, right? Like with the cards. Like with me telling you not to take any more cards. Right?”
Nik’s frown deepened. He glanced at Ledi, then back at me, his eyes harder.
"Yes."
"No matter what I say?"
"Dakota...” he growled.
"Fine. We'll argue specifics later. But you're not leaving this room without me, Nik... I mean it." I glanced over at Ledi, swallowing. "I don’t give a damn what he says, either."
Nik's eyes hardened more.
His gaze shifted from my face down to my body. He let his eyes linger there deliberately, even as the anger on his face worsened. Seeing the frustration growing in his expression, I sighed, relaxing back into his arms.
"Nik." I touched his face, trying to get him to turn. He resisted me briefly, then complied, his expression taut. "Nik, I want you. I swear I do... I'm not just saying it because of this. But I need you to listen to me, okay? I need you to do as I ask. Now, I mean."
He stared up at me, then down at the pendant around my neck.
"Nik. Either you trust me, or you don't. Either you belong to me, or you don't."
For a long moment he didn’t move.
I felt his breathing change right before he reached for me, tugging me closer to him, then holding me against his chest.
"Please don't manipulate me, Dakota...” he said. "Please. I can’t deal with it. I won’t be able to stop it... and I’ll resent you for it."
“I’m not,” I said.
I swallowed again, fighting to keep my mind clear when his hands slid under the blanket.
"I'm not manipulating you, Nik... I'm not trying to, anyway. I'm giving you an order, okay? Can you deal with that?"
The pain in his expression worsened just before he nodded.
Hesitating only the barest breath, I leaned down towards him.
I only meant for it to be a brief kiss, maybe even just some kind of reassurance, but his lips parted easily under mine as if he’d been waiting for it.
When I didn’t pull away, his fingers curled around the back of my head, holding me against him.
I lost myself in the kiss when he deepened it, in spite of my better judgment, in spite of Ledi standing there, in spite of the guards outside who might be watching everything through surveillance. Nihkil held me there for what felt like a long beat of time, exploring my mouth with his tongue until he gasped against my lips.
He paused to kiss my face and the corners of my lips, then pulled me back down, kissing me on the mouth again, only harder, until I had trouble breathing.
I finally pulled away.
I practically had to force myself to do it.
I guess that answered one question that had been hovering in the background of my thoughts. Morph could definitely kiss. A little too well, maybe... in Nik’s case, at least. I didn’t really want to think about how much practice Nik might have gotten in that, especially in the past few weeks.
His mouth followed mine up when I raised my head, but I broke it off anyway, flushing a little when I looked down at him, seeing the glassy look in his eyes.
He pressed his face against my neck.
Nik’s breathing gradually grew heavier as I continued to touch him, right before he let out a soft sound. The desire I'd felt on him earlier was on the surface now; I could feel it through the lock, and something about that and his hands on me pretty much shut off my mind altogether.
I forced myself to remember where we were.
That feeling burned in my chest, though, pulling at me... harder, until my fingers curled into his hair.
His mouth found mine again seconds later.
I kissed him back that time, parting my lips without thinking about that, either, and his hands abruptly tightened. My skin flushed hot when his palms slid up to my hips, yanking me closer until I sat astride him. When I let him kiss me again, he made another low sound.
He was asking me openly then, using the implant when I didn't answer the impulse he sent through the thread tying my chest to his.
I pulled his hands off me a second time, struggling for control as he fought to tug me deeper into his lap.
"Dakota." He pressed his face against mine. "Please. Please...”
"Nik, control yourself, jesus. We can't. Not here...”
"It’ll release the lock. I know it will…just let me, please...”
"Nihkil," I reminded him softly. "Ledi."
The morph didn’t move for a moment.
Then he met my gaze. A near anger touched his eyes, which were a greenish-gold now, shining at me in the artificial light from the walls. It was difficult to look away from him in those few seconds, to even breathe while he stared at me.
As if finding what he’d been looking for in my face, he turned, facing Ledi, who now clearly looked uncomfortable from where he stood by the closed door.
"Leave us," Nik said. "One hour. I'll contact you when––"
"What?" Ledi gave him a disbelieving look, one he trained on me a second later. "No, Nihki’. Absolutely not. Have both of you taken leave of your senses? There are people trying to kill you, or hadn't you noticed? Now isn't the time for––"
"I asked you to leave!" the morph said. "Please. Delay this. Only for a short time. I promise to contact you when––"
"I cannot delay this, Nihkil! You know I cannot... you and I designed these plans together!"
Nik's face darkened in anger. He looked ready to argue again, but that time, I slid my fingers deeper into his hair. Tightening my hold on him, I turned his face towards me, feeling his resistance even as he complied.
"Nik. Hey." I touched his jaw, watching his eyes change as he looked at me. "He's right, okay? You know he’s right. We can't do this now. Not now, okay?"
For a long moment, Nik only looked at me, his eyes still holding that sharper edge.
We stared at one another, and for a brief moment, I found myself remembering, really remembering, that however Nihkil might look to me right then, he wasn't human. That urgency I felt on him wound around me like an electric current, reminding me that it wasn't the same as what I'd felt on men back home, even when they were seriously in the mood. A kind of base, animal strength lived there that I'd managed to pretend wasn't really a part of Nihkil, either... or that I somehow had a way to control.
Somewhere in that, I found myself remembering what he'd done to that mark in Seattle, how easily he’d taken that guy out of the equation, when I’d barely been holding my own with him. I'd managed to set aside that incident in the time since, too, maybe because it was easier than remembering Nik that way.
The truth was, whatever control I thought I had over Nihkil, he'd given to me.
He could just as easily take it back.
Somehow, I'd managed to forget that.
His fingers caressed my belly and I swallowed.
"We’d better go," I said lamely.
But he seemed to have conceded this fight, too.
He nodded, his eyes distant.
After he pushed me gently off his lap, he pulled his weight off to one side of the bed. I looked away when he threw off the blanket, watching only peripherally as he pulled his pants on from where he sat on the edge of the bed. He buckled the front of them, then rose shakily to his feet, one hand pressed to his side as he used the wall for balance with the other.
<
br /> I noticed that Ledi’s eyes never left the morph as Nihkil looked around on the floor, probably for his shoes.
I also couldn't help noticing that Nihkil was visibly hard, even through the pants, and something told me that Ledi had definitely noticed that, too.
Something in Ledi's stare bothered me, even beyond that, but I couldn't quite put my finger on what it was. I couldn't even be sure it came from Ledi himself, or had more to do with the overall situation. Maybe for the first time I'd started to wonder if Ledi might have his own agenda in all of this.
Or maybe I just wondered if maybe his loyalties might be more divided than I’d let myself believe.
Whatever it was, I couldn't figure it out, not in terms of specifics.
All I knew was that I was worried, and not for myself.
My spidey-sense was going off, big-time and for sure.
For now, that was enough.
22
... AND THE SPIDEY SENSE IS RIGHT AGAIN
NIHKIL WALKED THE the tunnel behind Ledi.
I walked behind them.
Black-clad guards surrounded all three of us, but I still felt strangely naked as we made our way down the main concourse towards the outdoor hangars.
I knew I probably still watched Nihkil too closely. I did it anyway, noting his limp and the way he favored his right side, as well as the way the guards seemed to cluster around him, as though he were some kind of chained animal.
Ledi continued to watch Nik as closely as I did, but for some reason, his concern didn’t reassure me the way maybe it should have.
We hadn't waited for the supernaturals.
We hadn’t even waited for Nik’s sister, Mai-rhani.
Once Ledi realized the two of us were serious about staying together, he opted for a swift departure, before anyone thought to send out a second retrieval party for Nik and me. I got the sense he also wanted us out of there before the chaos cleared up in the aftermath of the bombing. Ledi and Nihkil said something about getting to the hangars before the next big shift change, too, but I didn’t fully get the significance of that.
I didn’t want to slow things down by asking questions, either.
