by D. Kelly
“But… We’ll also have birthdays and family game night, Halloween, Christmas, Easter, tooth fairies, and one day, grandkids.”
“Well, when you put it like that it does sound pretty good. I love you, Jake.”
“I love you, too. But before we make any final decisions, I want to remind you of the promise you made me on the swing today. I’m holding you to that, April. I still want our little girl. I won’t love Mia or Hannah any less but I need this.”
She bites her lip softly. “I know you do and I won’t go back on my promise. It won’t be right away, though. Going from no kids to three kids at warp speed is crazy enough. We’re going to have to adjust first and it could take a few years until I’m ready again.”
“Fair enough. In the meantime, do whatever you have to do tomorrow to get the paperwork going. I want the girls with us by Halloween.”
She smiles and shakes her head. “There are some things money can’t buy, Jake. We’ll be lucky to get them by Thanksgiving if you can open your schedule to do the interviews, classes, home check, and background checks when they need us to, not when you can fit them in.”
“Well, that blows. Can we at least take them trick or treating? Is that allowed?”
“I’ll see what I can do. I can’t believe we’re really going to do this.”
“Me, either, but it feels right, and if it feels right, why not?”
“Remember that when they become teenagers and all our periods sync up.”
“You did not just have to go there.”
“I’m just saying a house full of women is what you’re going to be up against. It’s a completely different dynamic than a house full of men. You grew up around all boys but I had five sisters and it’s not always pretty.”
“Maybe not, but I’m sure it will be worth it. I know you are.”
“Aw, that’s the sweetest thing you could possibly say.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“And there goes the sweetness right out the window. My cocky husband is back.”
“You wouldn’t have me any other way.”
“No,” she says with a beaming smile, “I wouldn’t. You’re perfect for me.”
“Right back at you.”
“Alright, Jake, you’re one hundred percent positive? There’s no going back once we start the process. We can’t do that to them.”
“I’m all in.”
“Me, too,” she whispers as she leans in for a long, lingering kiss.
After I take April to our bed and make love to her again, I toss and turn for hours. Not because I’m freaked out about adopting the girls. I’m wracking my brain, trying to figure out a way to get them with us sooner rather than later. Eventually, I admit defeat and realize I have to do this by the books just like everyone else.
Since I can’t sleep, I pull out my laptop and research foster kids and companies involved with helping them. The statistics are staggering. Over three hundred and ninety-seven thousand children are in foster care in the United States alone. One third of those are eligible to be permanently adopted. The average length of a stay in foster care is a minimum of three years. Most children leave their homes with nothing more than the clothes on their backs. If they are lucky, they get to pack a few items.
The love and respect I have for my wife has just grown exponentially. It’s not like I didn’t realize her job was hard or how high the numbers were; I just never paid attention to it. I’m paying attention now.
For the next two hours, I go from website to website and make donations. Together We Rise gets a massive donation. Sleep Train gets a donation. The more sites I visit, the more donations I make. It’s once I finally feel semi-content that I’ve done something that may help in even the smallest of ways do I finally fall asleep.
April
Today is Halloween.
The last three weeks have flown by, and Jake and I are now in our new home. As promised, he packed all the sex toys and underwear and the movers packed everything else. His first order of business was christening every room with a different sexual endeavor; it took two days, but it was time well spent. Then we did a massive amount of furniture shopping because this house is much larger than the one we just left.
The looks on the stroller patrol’s faces were priceless. Jake and I didn’t tell anyone we were moving and since we didn’t need the money, we decided not to put the house on the market until everything was moved out. I’m not sure how our neighbors missed the moving trucks; maybe they were hoping I was moving out. Who knows? But as soon as Trina saw the real estate agent putting up the sign, I could see her texting away furiously on her phone to the rest of her posse.
Within minutes, they were surrounding the house, waiting for our agent to leave so they could knock. I’ve never felt so satisfied as I did when she whined about how much she was going to miss us and Jake told her the neighborhood just wasn’t a good fit for us. She tried to angle for information on where we were going but Jake didn’t give anything away. He just told them we were moving closer to our family now that the baby is close to making his entrance.
That was our very last time in the house; once we locked up behind us, we never looked back. Now, being here so close to everyone else, we’re extremely happy. Life finally feels like it’s falling together.
In the last three weeks, we’ve accomplished so much. Jake and I have taken all the necessary classes to move forward with the foster care and eventual adoption of Mia and Hannah. Our home visit was three days ago and seemed to go very well. Jake has been swamped at work and still hasn’t worked out this Connor situation, but he promises he will figure it out soon. And today, I met with my boss to let her know I won’t be returning to work once I take my maternity leave at the end of next week.
If someone would have asked me two months ago if I would give up my career for children, my answer would have been a resounding ‘no.’ Jake backing off and letting me know I could do whatever made me happy was really all it took for me to accept my future. As much as I hate to admit it, my mom was right about me. I want a house full of kids. I’m not quite sure I want seven of them, but four sounds like a good number.
Something else I realized was really the defining factor in my decision not to come back. While I know I could work and be an amazing mother to Jaxson, I realized I don’t want to. At least not right now. Adjusting to life with Mia and Hannah isn’t going to be easy; that’s a reality I’m well aware of. Knowing those girls deserve all of my attention made it easy to want to stay home with them, but then thinking about how sad I’ve been about missing out on all of my nieces and nephews and their milestones sort of sealed the deal. How I could have thought I’d be okay to miss out on all of that with Jaxson when I’m not even okay with missing it with them blows my mind. I’ve been living in a bubble of denial. I definitely want to go back to work—this won’t be a permanent thing—but maybe I’ll stay home until he’s old enough for preschool and the girls have become acclimated to their new lives.
I figured Jake would be excited I quit my job but he actually seemed sad. Although he kept reiterating he only wanted me to be happy, he still questions if I feel he pushed me into this. I don’t. This was my choice—one I’m more than happy to make.
“Are you ready?” Jake asks, leaning against the doorframe. He just finished putting Luvbug in the den for the night. I feel bad but he’d be all over the place with all the action tonight, so it’s better to put him to bed early.
Jakes eyeing me up appreciatively but I’m not sure why at this point. I’m huge; it’s definitely not much of a view. One more month to go until this little guy makes his appearance and I can’t wait.
“Almost. Just let me put this wig on and I’ll be ready.” Mrs. Robinson told us Mia and Hannah decided to dress up as Cinderella and Belle, so Jake and I are dressed up as Sleeping Beauty and Prince Phillip.
“You look beautiful,” he says, stalking toward me.
“You look fucking hot,” I toss back. Jake always
looks sexy but his costume this year is really turning me on. Usually, he’s some kind of scary monster. Maybe it’s the fact he so willingly dressed up as a prince for the girls that’s making him seem even more attractive.
“Yeah, I know,” he answers with a laugh as he pulls me in for a seductive kiss. As he pulls away, I let out a frustrated sigh.
“Horny again?”
“Always.”
“Well, Princess, I’m here to make your every desire come true. When we get home tonight, I’ll show you what really happens when the movie fades to black.”
“Prince Phillip, you mean to tell me there’s more than just happily ever after?”
“Oh, I’ll give you a happily ever after, or at least a happy ending… again and again.”
“I’m going to hold you to it. God, Jake, do you think all parents are this dirty behind their kids’ backs?”
He pauses and then smiles wickedly at me. “I sure the fuck hope so but if not, we’ll be the exception to the rule. Our sex life is going nowhere but up, babe. Kids or no kids, we’re still going to fuck like rabbits whenever we get the chance.”
“It’s funny… I thought we’d be home waiting for the kids to come tonight and envisioning what next year will be like with Jaxson. Now, here we are, taking the girls out and next year it will be us and three kids out trick or treating. Life works in mysterious ways.”
“Life works in the best ways. Hurry up, they’ll be here soon.” He places a soft kiss on my lips and goes downstairs.
Mrs. Robinson is bringing the girls here as a surprise and we’re taking them trick or treating with Hailey and Lucas. Misty and Jess are staying home to give out candy, so Connor and Mike are bringing the babies out for a bit. Kate put an ‘on your honor bowl’ out. She said she wasn’t going to miss taking the kids out and having a real family Halloween.
Mia and Hannah still don’t know we’re trying to become their parents. We didn’t want to get their hopes up in case it doesn’t work out, but we have been visiting them weekly and getting to know them better.
The doorbell rings and Jake calls out, “April, are you ready?”
“Yeah, on my way now.” Before I even make it to the bedroom door, he’s waiting for me, holding out his hand.
“I can walk down the stairs myself, Jake.”
“Perhaps, but a real prince wouldn’t let you. Besides, I don’t want you tripping on that long dress and falling down the stairs.”
“Auntie April, you look so pretty!” Hailey calls out when we get downstairs.
“Princess,” Lucas says, pointing at me with one hand and clutching a plastic pumpkin for candy in the other.
“That’s right, Luke, I’m a princess. And you two look like trouble!”
Hailey giggles, clutching her own pumpkin. “Yup, we’re trouble” They’re going as Thing 1 and Thing 2 from Cat in the Hat. Mike is going as the Cat. Kate and Daniel are dressed as Dorothy and The Scarecrow and Haven is Toto. They’re not here yet, but I know Connor, Jess, and the twins are dressing like The Incredibles and Misty and Grant are Superman and Supergirl.
“Alright, guys, trial run. Go outside and ring the doorbell.” Jake rallies the kids and steps out onto the porch, closing the door behind them. The doorbell rings immediately and as I swing open the door, Lucas timidly says, “Trick or treat.”
Hails, as enthusiastic as ever, follows it up with, “Smell my feet!”
“Mike, you didn’t!” I scold him. She cannot go around saying that all night.
He’s cracking up and high-fiving his daughter who is giggling like a loon. “She’s only allowed to say it to you and Jess. I just had to see your face!”
“Well, that’s good… I guess.” Jake’s smirking as I put entirely way too much candy in their buckets but I don’t care; I’m happy I get to spend the night with them tonight.
“Look who has back-up candy bags,” Connor calls out, walking up the driveway. He’s holding up jumbo-sized pillowcases with names on them. Good lord, he’s going to do candy dumps all night with the kids.
“Hell yeah!” Jake calls out. Hailey pins him with her eyes and Jake laughs. “Sorry, Hails, but it’s my house and there are no swear jar rules allowed here. Besides, hell isn’t a bad word, it’s just a place bad people go, so make sure you’re always a good girl.”
Her eyes are wide as she glances from Jake to Mike, waiting for her dad to tell her he’s lying. Mike looks torn because he knows he’s going to catch hell from Misty later but he follows Jake’s lead and nods.
“If you’re always a good girl, you’ve got nothing to worry about,” Mike informs her gently.
I’d like to slap him upside the head right now. “I can’t wait to watch Misty lay into you later when you have to explain to her why her four-year-old daughter is afraid of hell,” I whisper nastily in his ear.
“Your husband started it.”
“Don’t think I didn’t notice. He’s going to be in trouble, too. Tonight is not the optimum time to introduce little kids into the concept of hell. What is wrong with you guys?”
Thankfully, Hails is looking at her pillowcase Connor brought over and is distracted for the time being, but she’s a smart girl and I’m sure this is going to be brought up again soon.
“Here,” Connor says, handing me two pillowcases with Mia and Hannah’s names on them. Tears immediately come to my eyes.
Fuck these hormones; I hate crying.
“Connor… I…”
“It’s nothing. They’re going to be my nieces, right?” He shrugs but I don’t let him get away with blowing it off. I place a kiss on his cheek and give him a hug.
“Thank you, really. This is above and beyond.”
He pulls back, shaking his head. “No, what you and Jake are doing is above and beyond. I’m just being the best uncle ever.”
“You know they don’t know we want to bring them here, right?”
“Yeah, I got the memo. Don’t worry, if anyone slips up it won’t be me. You ought to keep an eye on your husband, though. Loose lips sink ships and all that,” he says with a wink as he walks away.
Jake is hardly a songbird when it comes to secrets; that title has always belonged to Connor and he knows it.
A few minutes later, Mrs. Robinson arrives with the girls and my heart melts; they look adorable. Jake grabs my hand and squeezes it hard. Our first Halloween with our daughters and they’re beautiful.
“Uncle Jake!” Hailey yells. “Are these your friends we’ve been waiting for?”
“Sure are, Hails.”
Hailey takes them in as they walk up the path and turns to Mike. “Daddy, next year I want to be a princess, too, okay?”
“Anything you want, baby girl,” he answers with a kiss to the top of her head. Before anyone gets the chance to greet them, Hailey runs up and introduces herself. This girl has never been one bit shy and I love it.
Kate is watching the scene around her—taking it all in—and I swear I can already see the tears in her eyes. This is one time I can’t joke about her empathy because I’m right there with her. These girls are just as much her family as they are ours.
“Wow!” Mia exclaims, looking at the house and all the decorations.
“This house is awesome!” Hannah cries out.
“Is this really your house? It’s so big…” Mia asks wondrously.
“This is our house and we decorated it extra special since we knew all of you were coming over tonight,” Jake answers with an enormous smile.
“Mia, Hannah, Mrs. Robinson, we’d like to introduce you to a few people. This is my brother, Connor, and his twins, Hope and Zayden.” Jake begins the introductions and like two perfectly behaved kids, Mia and Hannah shake hands and introduce themselves.
“This is my best friend, Daniel, and his wife, Kate, and their kids, Lucas and Haven.” I continue the introductions and watch Kate blink back her tears, but typical Kate hugs them hello instead of shaking hands.
“Over here is my best friend, Mike,
and you’ve already met his daughter, Hailey. And in the stroller over here is his son, Grant. You’ll get to meet a few more friends as we trick or treat tonight, too.”
Hannah pulls on my dress to get my attention and Mia is right next to her. “You and Jake match our costumes.”
“We do. We hope you don’t mind but when Mrs. Robinson told us what you were going to be, we couldn’t resist. It seemed like it would be fun.”
“I don’t mind,” Mia says softly.
“Me, either. Thank you for inviting us,” Hannah says before bouncing down the walk to Jake. She’s got a soft spot for him, but it’s pretty obvious Mia has one for me.
Over the course of the next two hours, we trick or treat our hearts out. The kids end up with a massive amount of candy. About halfway through, Mia and Hannah really begin to come out of their shells. They spend time talking and joking with all the grown-ups and I’m pretty sure they were completely smitten with Jess when they found out she was Connor’s wife.
Kate tells them how her, Jess, and Mike have been the best of friends since they were Mia and Hannah’s age and the girls light up in happiness. I’m sure as much as they want to believe they’ll always be friends, they may have been questioning if it was actually possible. Now they know. I’m dying to tell them they’re going to be sisters as soon as we get the green light but I just can’t do that to them. If this falls through, they’d be devastated.
So would we.
“Thank you so much for spending Halloween with us. We had so much fun!” Mia exclaims happily as she gives us hugs goodbye.
“Me, too!” Hannah squeals. “I bet this is what Halloween in a real family feels like,” she says as she hugs Jake. She doesn’t say it in sadness, just as a fact.
“Will we see you again soon?” Hannah asks as she says goodbye to me, Mia piping up along with her.
“Will we?”
“Of course. We’ll be by next week just like we have the past few weeks. We love visiting with you two.”
They nod and say their goodbyes to everyone when suddenly Hannah comes running back to me. “I forgot something,” she says and reaches out to pat my belly. “Bye, Jaxson.” She says it so sweetly and then runs back to catch up to Mia and Mrs. Robinson.
