by Meg Cabot
Not knowing what she could be talking about, I felt inside the front pocket . . .
. . . and pulled out a couple of folded sheets of paper. When I opened them, I saw that they were photocopies of George Washington’s Rules of Civility & Decent Behaviour in Company and Conversation.
I felt a stab of excitement go through me.
‘Oh, wow!’ I cried, looking around for someone to show. But everyone was busy talking – or crying.
No one, I realized, would care as much as me.
Except for Mrs Hunter. It was just like her to know that I would care . . . and to remember!
I folded up the rules and returned them to my backpack pocket.
Not because I didn’t want to read them all right away . . .
. . . but because the bus had started, and reading while the car is going always makes me feel sick.
And you never want to be the person to throw up on the bus.
Rule #20
Don’t Start What You Can’t Finish
The bus ride from Honeypot Prairie wasn’t anything like the bus ride to Honeypot Prairie. No one threw up.
No one was mean or sang songs about other people.
No one talked at all hardly.
People seemed to be really worn out. A few people, like Mary Kay and Erica, cried. Lots of people, like Rosemary and Joey, slept.
When we got to Walnut Knolls Elementary and the kids from there started getting off the bus, some people (OK, Cheyenne) acted as if their hearts were breaking and they were never going to recover.
‘Text me,’ Cheyenne screamed out of the window at Brittany and Lauren and Paige.
‘We will,’ they all screamed back.
‘They were just so nice,’ Cheyenne said to M and D, who agreed.
Mary Kay wasn’t speaking to me again, because I hadn’t told her how big the bee-sting on her chin really was.
But that was OK. I’m pretty used to Mary Kay not speaking to me by now.
I knew she’d get over being mad. Some day.
‘Keep it real,’ Scott Stamphley told Joey Fields, who barked sleepily at him.
Scott didn’t say anything to Cheyenne as he walked off the bus, even though she said, ‘Bye, Scott,’ in a very drippy manner that made me want to gag.
But he said, ‘Smell ya later, Stinkle,’ to me, and tugged very hard on one of my braids as he went by, then winked.
Sophie told me this was an unequivocal sign that he liked me.
‘I don’t think so,’ I said, rubbing my head.
‘Oh no,’ Sophie said. ‘I can guarantee it.’
But pulling a girl’s hair is not the same as throwing rocks at her classroom window and then sending her roses and giving her a diamond engagement ring.
So if Scott likes me he has a lot to learn.
When I told Sophie, Erica and Caroline what I’d learned about Mrs Hunter and her fiance as we all walked home from school after the bus let us off, they were completely in awe of me, not to mention my superior detective skills.
‘He’s going to work for the city planning commission?’ Sophie asked, wrinkling her nose. ‘That’s so boring!’
‘No it’s not,’ Caroline said. ‘That’s a very important place to work. Those people . . . plan things. For the city.’
‘It would be more romantic if he was a doctor,’ Sophie said. ‘For sick children in a country where they don’t have running water—’
‘But he’s not,’ Caroline said. ‘He works for the city planning commission. That’s a good job too. Not every job has to be romantic. Maybe he has other qualities. We know he’s funny. Maybe he bakes bread. Did she say he bakes bread?’
‘No,’ I said. ‘But he’s probably smart, if he works for the city planning commission. I bet he can learn how, if Master Baker Sean learned how.’
We’d reached the Stop sign where we always separated to go to our different streets . . . Caroline and Sophie to theirs, and me and Erica to ours.
‘Oh my gosh,’ Sophie said. ‘I just remembered, Allie. I hope Mewsie is all right.’
I felt a twist of nervousness in my stomach. I couldn’t believe, in all the excitement about the field trip, that I’d sort of forgotten about Mewsie.
‘I hope so too,’ I said.
‘He will be,’ Caroline said, handing me the nightgown I’d loaned her. ‘He’s a good cat.’
But being a good cat didn’t have anything to do with not being walled alive in someone’s house.
I knew she was just trying to make me feel better. That’s what friends do for one another.
‘Thanks,’ I said, and gave her, then Sophie, hugs goodbye.
When Erica and I got closer to my house, I could see the A+ Roofing van in the driveway, and the men on top of the roof.
‘Well,’ Erica said. ‘That’s a good sign.’
‘Why?’ I asked.
‘Well, if there was something wrong with Mewsie, your mom and dad would probably have sent A Plus Roofing home.’
I didn’t think Erica knew my mom and dad very well. But I said, ‘You’re probably right.’
‘Today was such a good day,’ Erica said with a happy sigh. ‘There’s no way anything bad could have happened to Mewsie to ruin it.’
I thought Erica was maybe suffering from field-trip overload. But I hugged her goodbye in my front yard anyway, gave her her mom’s apron back and said, ‘I’m sure you’re right!’ and tried to believe that she was right all the way up the steps to the front porch and through my front door, ignoring the fact that we’re supposed to use the side door through the utility room . . .
. . . because you can get upstairs much faster if you go through the front door of my house.
‘Hi I’m home,’ I yelled, throwing my backpack down at the bottom of the stairs, then taking the steps two at a time to the second floor.
‘Hi, honey’ I heard Mom calling from somewhere in the house. ‘How was your field trip? Did you have a nice time? Oh, Allie, don’t leave your things spilt all over the bottom of the stairs. I built you kids those nice cubbies in the utility room for you to put your things in, why won’t you ever . . .’
But I had already burst into Mark’s room and flung myself on to the floor of his closet, my face smushed in front of the hole in the wall.
‘Mewsie!’ I called. ‘Oh, Mewsie! Here, kitty, kitty kitty!’
He had to come out, I told myself. He just had to. Everything else had worked out . . . Joey. Mrs Hunter. Mary Kay (well, sort of).
Even Brittany and Cheyenne had worked out their differences. And during that wigwam thing with Mistress Carol, I’d felt like . . . well, I’d sort of felt like neither of them were all that bad at heart, once you got to know them, and they stopped playing their stupid games and started acting normal for a change.
So why couldn’t this one thing work out too?
‘Allie,’ Mom said from the doorway. She didn’t look too happy.
‘Mom,’ I said. There were tears in my eyes. I had held them in all day, and not cried once – even though I’d really wanted to cry a couple of times.
But now I just couldn’t hold my tears in any longer.
‘I can’t go put my backpack away right now,’ I said. ‘I have to get Mewsie out of the wall. I know you’re very disappointed in me because I’ve been so irresponsible. But I was actually very responsible today on the field trip. You can ask Mrs Hunter if you don’t believe me. Mary Kay got stung by a bee, and I’m the only one who stuck by her, even though everyone else ran away because they were afraid they might get stung. I walked her to the office and sat with her and everything. And you know I can’t stand Mary Kay. And I didn’t trade to get off the team I got assigned because I didn’t want to leave Joey Fields alone when everyone was picking on him, even though I don’t even like Joey Fields.’ I was crying when I said all this. ‘And it’s OK, because I don’t even want a cellphone any more. All I want is for Mewsie to be out of the wall. OK? That’s all I want.’
‘Well,’
Mom said, ‘in that case, you might want to go see what’s sitting on your bed.’
I just stared up at her through my tears.
‘What?’ I asked. ‘Why?’
‘Go look,’ Mom said, and held Mark’s bedroom door open for me.
Not sure what to expect, I got up off the floor and walked past Mom, out of Mark’s bedroom and across the hall to mine.
There, sitting on my bed, licking himself, sat Mewsie.
I screamed with happiness and ran to pick him up. I kissed him all over . . . even though he was covered in chips of wood and tiny snail-shells and pieces of something I’m pretty sure were the same mushrooms that had been on Kevin’s shirt when he’d been inside the wall.
And truthfully, Mewsie didn’t seem that glad to see me. He kept making grunting noises and even growling a little because I was squeezing him so tightly.
I didn’t care.
I was just so happy to have him back from his walk-about!
‘When did he come out?’ I asked Mom tearfully. Only now they were tears of happiness.
‘A little while ago,’ she said. ‘I think he knew it was time for you to come home from school, so he came out to wait for you.’
When she said this, I had to give Mewsie more kisses. He was the best cat ever!
Even if he’d been very, very naughty.
‘I told Mark to keep his door shut from now on,’ she said, ‘to keep Mewsie out until we can get the wall repaired.’
‘Thanks, Mom,’ I said, putting Mewsie down. Because even though I wanted to go on squeezing him, he was growling pretty unhappily.
Plus, he really was very dirty from being inside the wall.
‘So,’ Mom said, ‘I guess after all that I don’t even have to ask how Honeypot Prairie was. That bad, huh?’
I thought about it.
‘It wasn’t as fun as the Children’s Museum would have been,’ I said finally. ‘But I think I learned a lot of new stuff. Like, did you know that President Washington kept a book of rules when he was a kid? Mrs Hunter made a copy of them and gave it to me as a reward for sitting with Mary Kay after she got stung by the bee.’
Mom smiled.
‘Well,’ she said, ‘that was nice of her. But learning new stuff is actually the point of field trips, Allie.’
I had always sort of thought the point of field trips was to have fun.
‘Yeah,’ I said. ‘I guess you’re right.’
Mom reached out and hugged me.
‘Listen,’ she said. ‘It sounds like you took on a lot of responsibility during this field trip.’
‘Yeah,’ I said. ‘I really did.’
I felt a glimmer of hope. Was she going to –
‘I still don’t think you’re quite old enough to handle a cellphone right now,’ she said.
‘Aw, Mom,’ I said, my hopes crushed.
‘But sixth grade is an awfully long way away. What do you think about fifth grade?’
Fifth grade? Fifth grade was next year! Not even a year. Just one summer vacation away!
‘Really?’ I asked, brightening. ‘I can spend my money on a cellphone?’
‘You don’t even need to use your own money on it,’ she said. ‘Daddy and I will foot the bill. Now go put your backpack away in your cubby in the utility room.’
My heart filled with happiness, I ran to go do what she’d asked. I couldn’t believe my good fortune.
But later, as I was pinning President Washington’s rules to my bulletin board – where I’d be sure to see them first thing every morning and last thing every night – I realized I shouldn’t have been so surprised by how well everything had turned out.
Especially when I noticed Rule the Eighty-second: Undertake Not what you Cannot Perform, but be Careful to Keep your Promise.
Because this was exactly what I’d done: I’d made a promise – to myself – the night before that if Mewsie turned out to be OK, I wouldn’t complain any more (or at least, not as much). I’d also promised not to be irresponsible.
And today during the field trip, I’d been super responsible.
And look what had happened!
Don’t start what you can’t finish, but always keep your promises.
And OK, true, I still might complain sometimes. And I might even still be irresponsible.
But that’s why I had the rules: to remind me when I messed up!
Maybe, I thought to myself, old things – like President Washington’s rules – weren’t so bad after all. Without them, we wouldn’t know how good we had it in the present.
Like, if I hadn’t been friends with Mary Kay, I wouldn’t appreciate what great friends I had in Erica, Caroline and Sophie.
And if I didn’t have the Allie of the past to compare myself to, I wouldn’t know how great the new-and-improved Allie was!
I decided that I liked her already.
Allie Finkle’s Rules
It’s important to be nice to your neighbours.
Losing electronic devices is irresponsible.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse.
No one goes in the wall.
Moms don’t snap too often. But when they do, you had better stop whatever you are doing wrong, if you know what’s good for you.
No cellphones until you’re in the sixth grade.
If you’ve earned the money, you should be allowed to spend it on whatever you want.
If you have to walk your little brother to and from kindergarten every day, you should be considered responsible enough to have a cellphone.
Cheyenne O’Malley is the most popular girl in Room 209, and probably in the whole world . . . at least in her own mind.
When a teacher like Mrs Hunter says she has an announcement, you know it’s going to be something exciting.
Asking teachers about their boyfriends is against the rules.
Don’t trust something important (such as handing in a permission slip) to somebody flaky (and mean).
If there’s going to be a field trip and Allie Finkle is scheduled to go on it, you can just count her out.
Boys do weird things to show girls that they like them, such as try to wipe boogers on them.
Living history museums are totally boring.
Extra credit is always nice to have, just in case.
Never go to a birthday party given by the most popular girl in your old school just because her mother has rented a limo to take you there. It will not turn out well.
If you don’t keep wounds clean, they could become infected, and then might become gangrenous and you could die.
When you’re feeling bad, the worst thing you can do is inflict your bad mood on others.
If you want to fix the leaks and kill the dry rot going on inside your walls, you’re going to have to replace a lot of shingles.
No slamming doors.
It’s all good practice for when you’re famous.
Never read other people’s private correspondence.
It’s always better to lie if that lie makes someone feel better.
If you went somewhere and had a terrible time, maybe tone it down a little when you’re describing it to people later, or they might blow it out of proportion, and then it could come back to haunt you.
It’s very rude to call someone a troglodyte.
You can’t wear a nightgown to school.
No Finkle kid can go on the roof.
Nothing else matters when you’ve lost the one thing you care about more than anything else in the whole world.
None of us has any idea how truly awful things can get.
Anyone who could fall for Kevin’s cute face is not to be trusted.
The only things that matter are the people – and pets – you love.
Make sure your little brothers don’t do stupid things.
Never eat anything red.
It’s rude to tell someone they look like a French poodle. Unless they are, in fact, a French poodle.
If you can’t say something nice, just
keep your mouth shut. Really.
The best way to keep people from talking about a certain subject is not to bring it up yourself.
Old things bring nothing but trouble.
Bullying is wrong, even when it’s being done to someone who is a bully herself.
You can’t have enough buddies.
No getting up while the bus is in motion.
No trading team assignments.
If you’re caught trading team assignments, the punishment will be severe.
It’s wrong to hate people.
Taking walkabouts from people when they need you most is just about the most irresponsible thing you can do.
It’s important to make a big entrance.
Tattling on people is kind of mean. Unless it’s for a good reason.
Every Action done in Company ought to be with Some Sign of Respect to those that are Present. (When you’re in the company of others, you ought to be respectful and courteous of them.)
When in Company, put not your Hands to any Part of the Body not usually Discovered. (When you’re with other people, do not stick your hands down your trousers or your fingers up your nose.)
Show Nothing to your Friend that may Affright him. (Don’t scare your friends.)
Use no Reproachful Language against anyone, neither Curse nor Revile.
Speak not Injurious Words neither in Jest nor Earnest.
Appear calm in the face of a medical emegency.
Eavesdropping is wrong.
