by S. R. Watson
“How about, I don’t give a flying fuck?” I snap.
My once frozen veins thaw with venom. I want to throat punch her ass.
“I’ll give you a clue anyway. It means I’m irreplaceable. In case he didn’t fill you in, we have some things we need to work on, and that’s why I’m here. He wants things to be the way they were before. He has access to all the pussy that his rising fame affords, but guess what? He still chooses me over a mere casual fuck.”
“Girl, your warnings are in vain but say whatever you need to make yourself feel better. Instead of being up here trying to warn me off your guy, you should go be with him. I’m good.”
I wave my hand to dismiss her. She rolls her eyes and heads for the door. She pauses for a beat and then turns and gives me one final warning. “Just stay the fuck away from him.” She leaves on that note, satisfied to get in the last word.
She runs into Lily on the way out. “What was that about?” Lily asks as soon as she thinks Melissa is out of earshot.
“Nothing worth repeating. Just warning me to stay away from Diesel.”
“Why in the hell did she feel the need to do that? I mean, Xander and I were both surprised to see her back early. We knew you had gone down to the beach and that Diesel had followed you out there. What happened?”
“Aren’t you watching movies with my brother?” I force a fake giggle, but it falls flat.
“I told him to pause it—that I’d be back.”
“Honestly, I don’t feel like rehashing it all right now. It’s nothing detrimental or worth losing quality time with your man over. I can give you the gist tomorrow over tea when the guys leave for rehearsal.”
She looks at me unsure. The pity in her eyes match Diesel’s earlier. “Are you sure? Xander would understand.”
Sure the hell he would. Probably secretly laugh at my stupidity and his canny ability to predict this whole thing was a bad idea.
“Go, woman! I’m fine. I have some yummy alphas to keep me company,” I joke as I pull out a romance novel from the nightstand.
“Is it any good?” she asks, still unsure.
“Yes. The heroine is secretly pregnant by the best friend’s brother. He’s an old flame, but he left. He came back into the picture only to find out she’d moved on with his friend. He wants her back, so I’m waiting to see who she goes with.”
“Sounds interesting.”
“It is. Now go on so I can read,” I say, pushing her out the door.
“Okay, but tomorrow we’re going to talk.”
“Absolutely. Now go.”
When she leaves, I can finally let the events of tonight take hold. I sit on the bed with my book, wishing I really could get lost in the story of the characters. Instead, Melissa’s words play on a loop. I get the sinking feeling that she was his submissive. What other things would blow my vanilla mind? She sounds just like Diesel in that regard, and it makes sense. She has a different kind of bond with him, and I may be fighting an uphill battle. Hell, she said that she’s here for them to work things out. That he wants thing to go back to the way they were. I don’t know what the hell “things” are, but he’s surely not saying anything to the contrary. It could also explain why he’s not sleeping with her. They’re in the middle of working things out, and he’s fucking me in the interim.
I may need to seriously rethink my intent. Besides, he looks fine to me. If he was spiraling or had some issues to work through, maybe her presence was what he needed—the real reason’s she here. If that’s the case, I need to accept that what we had has been replaced and move the fuck on. I don’t know how much more of this I can take. Fighting for a lost cause is the definition of insanity. He’s not a lost cause, but the obliteration of our relationship is.
With the rise of the sun comes another promise of a shit day. Having Melissa here is starting to weigh more on my psyche than I care for. I have Sevyn working alongside the PI the company hired to find out what they can about the board members, but things aren’t progressing as I’d hoped. I’ve purposely launched my own investigation into Melissa’s involvement via my brother without him knowing what I’m searching for.
The sun shines through the floor-to-ceiling windows, which usually offers a nice view of the beach—except when you spent the night on the sofa and aren’t quite ready to get up. I know I need to run off last night’s pizza, but I don’t have the motivation this morning. The conversation with Lourdes plays on a loop. I can’t seem to shake the guilt gnawing at me. I refuse to be weak for her or any woman, but I’m drawn to her. I want something with her even if I don’t know what the hell that looks like yet. I can feel her slipping away from me, but there’s little I can do without telling her what’s going on with Melissa. I don’t have to look outside to know she won’t be out there to join me on my morning jog.
After she disappeared to her room last night, she never came out again. My phone vibrates next to me, and I welcome the reprieve.
“Hey, brother,” Sevyn greets.
“Tell me you have new info for me.” I get straight to the point.
“Actually, I do, and I kind of think you already knew.”
“Okay. Are you going to spit it out already?”
“To start, we uncovered that the man consorting with Trevor in attempt to get control of our company is none other than his lover.”
“What? Trevor’s married. He’s not gay.”
“Never said he didn’t like pussy. I said he’s getting dick on the side. The question is whether the wife knows about it. Maybe money and their opulent lifestyle is enough for her to turn a blind eye.”
“I don’t understand. How is this something I already knew, and how can we use this as leverage? His sexuality is not enough to get the board members and shareholders on our side after our twin scandal. They don’t trust us.”
“Because I’m guessing you knew that Melissa is Trevor’s daughter.” I fall silent. He’s right. “That’s why you have her there with you. You’re keeping her close until you find out what you need to know.”
“Yeah,” I admit.
“Why in the hell didn’t you tell me? We work better together, brother. Secrets have caused enough issues.”
“I wanted you to be the objective one on this and not see things through a jaded lens. You were so pissed with me when you originally found out that I was bringing her on the tour, but I couldn’t tell you why at the time. I needed you back in New York searching for the unknown and look … you found the connection.”
“I was pissed because you were letting the woman who put all this shit into motion back in your life. I thought your need for submission was outweighing your common sense. I just decided not to push because things between us were already hanging on by a thread.”
The guys begin to trickle in, so I know I need to take this call somewhere else.
“You slept on the sofa last night?” Xander asks. It’s the first time he’s had more than two words to say to me since our fight.
“Yeah,” I confirm. I’m already folding up my blankets.
“Trouble in paradise already?”
“Nah. I couldn’t sleep, so I came out here so my tossing and turning didn’t wake Melissa.”
It’s the same lie I’ll feed her too when she asks where I went. The truth is, lying in bed with her after the fantastic fuck I had with Lourdes in the same bed was adding to the guilt. Not for her, but the reminder of the shit I was bringing the woman who continues to wreak havoc on my mind.
“Ah, I see.” He nods and then heads straight to the Keurig. “Want a cup?”
He points at the coffee, and I admit I’m shocked. I wasn’t really ready for a cup of coffee, but if this is his idea of an olive branch, then I’ll take it.
“Yes. Thank you,” I say. “I’m going to take this call outside. It’s Sevyn,” I say, holding up the phone. “Sorry about that,” I offer when I finally get far enough from the house.
“You and Xander finally made up?”
“Actually, that’s the first time he’s even tried to have a conversation since our fight.”
“Yeah. Probably because he thinks you’re moving on from his sister and no longer the enemy.” He chuckles. “I overheard him say you slept on the sofa last night. Please tell me you’re not getting some sideline action in the interim of things.”
“Hell, no. I don’t need things to get any messier than they already are. When the time comes, I need a clean fucking break—not muddied waters.”
“How do you think she fits into this? Do you think she’s spying on us for Trevor?”
I tell him about how I found out Trevor was her father. The missed call she got from him during our meetup, and her mysterious trip to New York under false pretenses shortly after.
“I don’t doubt it. We just need to find out why, and what does he hope to uncover. More scandal to push for a hostile takeover?”
“What does she think she’s there for?”
“For a chance to repair the shitstorm she created. She wants to rekindle things. It’s laughable that she thinks she could ever be trusted. Some stuff you just can’t ever come back from.”
“Well, I’ll keep digging with Pete. I’ll be there in time for your concert this weekend, and hopefully, I’ll have more news for you by then.”
“That would be great. I’m ready for that chick to get gone.”
I don’t bring up the strain that having her here is causing with Lourdes, and he doesn’t ask. I need to be as objective as I’m wanting him to be if this is going to work.
“Later, brother.”
I end the call and head back into the house.
“Just in time. Here is your coffee—black.”
“Thanks, man.” I take the mug from him.
“Were you guys talking about the whole twin scandal thing?”
“Yeah.”
“Speaking of, Desiree called while you were outside on the phone. The Round Table wants to air your side of the story. An exclusive. She’ll be here in a couple of hours to ride with you to Houston. The interview is this afternoon.”
“What the hell? Why so short of notice?”
“She said they had some sort of cancellation and were willing to fit you in. Desiree got the call this morning.”
“I don’t like it. I can’t give them exclusive shit we’re still investigating. I need to call and give my father and brother a heads-up.”
Then I get an idea. The Round Table has given me the perfect platform to spin this and weaken Melissa’s trump card with a single interview. A smile forms on my lips. Step one … dismantle. I text Sevyn and tell him to set up a conference call with him, myself, and Claude. He agrees to call me as soon as he sets it up.
“No rehearsal today?” Anderson asks, coming into the living room.
“Nope. Free day! Diesel has some interview later, so we’re all finding something to get into,” Keyser speaks up. He’s been quiet up to this point. He’s not much of a morning person.
“Ooh. Let’s have a barbecue,” Mitch says a little too excited. Someone says free day, and he appears. That guy looks for any reason to party. “Gable and I can go get some meat to throw on the grill.”
While they discuss it further, I excuse myself for a shower. Melissa is sitting up in bed, toying with her phone when I enter the room.
I look past her and begin searching for what I’ll wear to this interview, optimistic for the first time.
“Where did you go last night, Diesel?” she asks timidly. “Did you go to her bed?”
I give her my best “are you fucking insane” look. We already discussed that she isn’t in a position to question me. I’m not her guy.
“I slept on the damn sofa.” I give her the same spiel I gave Xander.
“Sorry for jumping to conclusions. It’s just that, I know how heady your sexual appetite is, and well … you haven’t touched me.”
She’s right about my insatiable sex drive. My dick has been at half-mast all day, every day. I’ve gotten a few good nuts in with Lourdes and even a few self tugs, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t in a constant state of horniness.
“You also know the extent of my self-control as well. I’m not at the mercy of my dick. I decide who gets a taste and when. I’ll make sure to give it an extra tug in the shower just for you.” I smirk.
She’s not happy about that at all. The thought that I’d rather jerk off than fuck her has to be a blow to the ego.
“How long are you going to keep punishing me? You’re not even trying.”
That’s it. She needs a quick lesson—a reminder of who’s in charge. I walk over to the closet and grab her two suitcases, flinging them onto the bed next to her.
“What are you doing?” she shrieks.
“Not trying,” I growl. “Now pack your shit.”
“No. No. No. Diesel, please.”
“You shouldn’t even fucking be here. Can you fathom the fucking chaos that you’ve caused? You leaked that my father was sick and threatened to leak our brand of kink? You tried to single-handedly bring down our company, and you’ve yet to say why.”
“I know, and I’m so sorry. You’re right. I know the fact that I’m here is you trying.”
“I’m trying to understand. Understand why someone I care about would try to hurt me and my family.”
“I promise that wasn’t my intent. I really messed up. You’re just so beyond reproach now with your rising fame. I needed something that would get your attention.” The fucking waterworks begin, and I’m surprised at the callousness I feel. “I tried finding you on tour, but you were dismissive—said that nothing could happen between us.”
“So you thought screwing with my family’s livelihood and reputation was the way back to me?” This chick is beyond mental.
“No. I just needed your attention. Good or bad. I had to start somewhere. I confessed to Sevyn what I did. I didn’t have to if my intent was malicious. I needed a way back in—a way for you to see me.”
“Congrats, Melissa. I see you, but it’s not the woman who was once an escape for all the bullshit in my life. Instead, you’re the cause. So tell me. What am I supposed to do with that?”
“I didn’t think that far. I just know how much I love you. I’d do anything for you—anything to keep you in my life.”
“Yeah, except tell me the truth.”
I abort my plan for a shower and a jerk session. If I hadn’t stumbled upon her second phone, I’d probably have fallen for that Academy Award-worthy performance. It’s a testament to why I find it hard to trust—the reason I’m finding it difficult to let Lourdes in. My whole life has been one lie after another. For fuck’s sake, Claude is not even my biological father, and my mother, of all people, cheated with his twin. Nothing is ever as it seems. How can I trust when I’m being lied to at every turn?
I leave Melissa to think about my last remark. I just wish she would have the decency to come clean and share how she fits into Trevor’s plan to take over our company. It’s highly unlikely, so she’ll just have to face the retribution from the Diesel she’s conjured up. Challenge accepted. Back to step one.
I decide to go for that run after all. I need the mental clarity it affords. I’ll get a run in and wait for Sevyn to call me back.
“Want some breakfast?” Lily asks as I enter the living room. “I made some omelets, but I made an egg white one in case you haven’t eaten.”
“Thanks, Lil. That was super sweet. I’m headed for a run first, so I’ll get it when I get back for sure.”
The thought of omelets reminds me of Lourdes and the feast I had on her pussy after she made one for me. I’m guessing she’s still upstairs. She and Ivy are the only two missing. Although Ivy has been missing in action a lot lately. She’s been seeing some dude, which is more than fine by me.
“Not a problem. I’ll just put it in the microwave for you.”
I nod before heading out. Time to mentally plan my attack for this upcoming interview. I can’t wait to
tell Claude and Sevyn how I’m going to flip this shit on its head. But first, I have some explaining to do.
I’ve stalled going downstairs as long as I could. Three hours of finishing my romance novel followed by a long soak in the tub. Lily knocked on the bathroom door about an hour ago to tell me the guys had no rehearsal today. Apparently, Diesel has some live interview down in Houston and Melissa left with him. They guys are grilling on the beach until it’s time to tune into the interview. My stomach grumbles for the fourth the time since then. My granola bar and banana are wearing off. I change into a pair of cutoffs and a tank. I have no plans to get in the water. I just need to get some food in me. I’m thankful Melissa left as well. I’m not in the mood to face her.
I pad down downstairs, only to find everybody glued to the flat screen in the living room.
“Turn it up,” Keyser shouts. “There’s Diesel.”
And there he is in HD. He crosses a jeans-clad leg over his knee and sinks back into the leather. He runs a single hand through his hair, giving the host a charming smile. His band tee clings to his muscular chest … just pure perfection. The questions start simple enough. He begins with telling a little about the band, but the interview quickly transitions into questions about the recent twin scandal and Beck Investment Firm. The room goes quiet as we listen to how Diesel will handle this.
He explains that there was never a scandal. He confirms that his father is indeed terminal and his last trip out of the country was to plan how he wanted to move forward with handing over the reins of the company he worked so hard to build. He gave the controlling shares to Sevyn in case he didn’t survive the trip. He further explains he was a contingency plan in the interest of joint ownership should those reins be passed on to Sevyn prematurely. Claude not only knew about it but also gave the plan his blessing. Without going into specifics, he informs the hosts that a threat has been launched at his family’s company—one that he can’t divulge, but that was the reason for the transfer of controlling shares. His father is protecting what he’s built as well as his shareholders and board members.
