by Lily Foster
“No, Dad, I know. I just didn’t realize that I’d be there half the time.”
“Is it going to be a problem?” That was my father’s code for: end of discussion.
“No, of course not.”
Two weeks out of every month, I thought to myself, making six months out of the year that I’d be away from her. At first I was angry about it but I started to see the potential bright side. Maybe her parents would let her come out to visit me one weekend a month; Chicago could be our little vacation together away from her overprotective parents.
Kasia met me after my first day back in the New York offices. I was glad it was a Friday because I was still a little jet lagged and was looking forward to sleeping half of the day away on Saturday. I groaned to myself as I walked towards the restaurant thinking that I’d have to get Kasia home to Brooklyn some way tonight; her parents now had her back in their clutches. Shit, I hoped they’d be okay with a car service taking her home.
She looked at me warily when we met on the corner of Columbus and seventy-second. “Dylan, we don’t have to eat out. You look like you could face plant on the sidewalk at any moment.”
“Is it that obvious? I felt fine this morning but now I feel exhausted.”
“Come on. Let’s go back to your apartment and get you into bed.”
“No, I’ll rally. Besides, I have to get you back to Brooklyn later. I don’t want to be on your dad’s shit list day-one that I’m back in town.”
She smiled at me and waggled her eyebrows. “My parents are away. Michal gave them a trip to the North Fork wineries for their anniversary,” she laughed, “I guarantee they’re going to hate it. But the upside is that I can stay with you.”
“What did you tell them?”
“That I’d rather stay in the city than come back home late and be home alone.”
“They went for it?” She nodded. “I’ll make it up to you, Kasia. Tomorrow night I’ll take you out on the town, anywhere you want.”
“Dylan, I don’t care about that. I’d actually much rather just curl up next to you tonight than spend three hours in a restaurant.”
And that’s exactly what we did. We actually took a shower together without fooling around—I was that tired—and I fell asleep waiting for the takeout to be delivered. When I woke up I was home; Kasia nestled in the crook of my body, fitting perfectly against me. I looked over to the clock and saw that it was noon. That’s exactly what I’d needed, a solid sixteen hour sleep. My entire body was awake now and Kasia wiggled her body back closer into me in response. “Mmm, I’ve missed this,” she said in a sweet, drowsy voice.
My hands moved over her then, exploring every inch of her as if I needed to learn the curves of her body again. “You feel so good, Kasia.” I rolled onto her and grasped her hands above her head in one of mine. “Have you been good while I’ve been away?”
She shook her head, licking her lips, playing along. “No, I’ve been very, very bad. How are you going to punish me?”
We could never get past a line or two of role-playing before busting out laughing and today was no exception. We spent the entire day in bed together, leaving only to heat up the left-overs from last night, which we ate in bed. “My plan was to christen every room. We’ve got our work cut out for us.”
“I’d say after today, Dylan, this room is thoroughly christened. My body is actually sore—like I’ve been at the gym for hours kind-of sore.”
I teased, “Am I so big that I’ve hurt you, Kasia?”
She went to get up from the bed and shrugged as she said, “I’ve had bigger.”
“What?” I grabbed her around the waist and dragged her naked body back to the bed as she laughed uncontrollably. “You better take that back, Kasia,” I threatened as I tickled her into spasms.
“Stop it, Dylan!”
“Take it back, Kasia.”
“No!” She was nearly unable to breathe when she gave in. “Okay, okay! Just stop, please.”
“Now, am I, or am I not the biggest you’ve ever had, Kasia?”
“Ugh, I don’t want to stroke that already overly-inflated ego. You think you’re a sex god or something.”
Wounded, I denied it, “I do not! I just need to know, Kasia.”
She rolled out from under me then and pushed me back onto the mattress as she sat astride me. Her hair hung in golden waves down just past her breasts. She looked like some beautiful, living work of art staring down at me. “Okay,” she knotted her brows and stuck out her lower lip but there was a smile creeping through that phony pout, “this,” she inched her body back and then stroked her hand slowly up and down my hard length, “is the biggest,” she licked her lips slowly, driving me crazy, “and most talented cock I’ve ever had the pleasure to know.”
What followed was the best blow job of my life.
It was torture driving her back out to Brooklyn later that night. Besides the traffic, I just hated sleeping without her. I’d become used to her soft body next to mine, that sweet smell that was uniquely Kasia, and hearing her voice speak my name when I woke up. My apartment felt too quiet and empty when I got back. I decided to turn in early. It was Saturday night but Kasia’s parents were home and she had a family baby shower or something the next morning. She didn’t think it was worth pushing her parents to ask for another night.
My phone rang at about eleven. It was Melanie. I could hear from the music and chatter in the background that she was at a party. “Hey, you’re back!”
“Yeah, got back a couple of days ago.” Why did I even pick up? Talking to her just felt wrong now but I knew that I’d have to learn to manage her. Our families were close—it wasn’t like I could totally cut ties with her. Bored, I asked, “How’s life as a college graduate, Melanie?”
“Hold on,” she said as she moved someplace quieter. “Um, it’s been busy. I moved into my new place. Your mother was here last week with my mother, giving me decorating tips. It was comical.”
“Sounds like fun.”
“Loads.” She sounded down and reminders of the close relationship between our families softened me. “You alright? Are you missing Christian?”
“Yeah, I am. I thought I’d love having my own apartment in the big city but the past two weeks have been lonely, you know? I’m at a party with people I barely know tonight, Christian’s in California, the few girls I’d actually call real friends are traipsing around Europe or someplace else, and I’m working at a place where everyone treats me like a goddamn imbecile.”
“You are not an imbecile. It’s an adjustment. You just have to give it some time, Mel.”
“I know, Dylan, thanks. Hey, I know you have to be careful with Kasia and everything but…do you think we could hang out one night after work this week? Christian can’t come back out east for another two weeks.”
“He’s making my party, right?”
“That’s when he’s flying back. He wouldn’t miss that.”
“Good. Yeah, Melanie, definitely, we’ll hook up one night this week.” She actually sounded like she needed a friend.
I drove out to Brooklyn Sunday night specifically to tell Kasia about my conversation with Melanie. I wasn’t taking any chances and was trying my best to be as open and honest as humanly possible. We sat drinking cappuccinos in a corner café near her house and, as I expected, Kasia rolled her eyes as when I told her how depressed Melanie sounded.
“Do you mind if I meet up with her for a little while after work Thursday?”
“Thursday we were going to see Sophia’s brother play.”
“I’ll change it to another night.”
“Don’t bother,” she forced a smile then as she stroked my cheek. “And I’m not saying that to be a bitch, Dylan, although I can’t really say I’m buying the ‘Melanie damsel in distress’ act. I’ll take Darcy with me on Thursday. Sophia’s brother is pretty cute and he plays guitar; maybe he’ll take her mind off of Tom.”
“Uh, I don’t want to be responsible for setting Da
rcy up with some other guy.”
She frowned. “I know…I was half-joking. She’s not even close to looking for a rebound guy, so don’t worry. It’s awful, Dylan. She sounds so unhappy, it’s heartbreaking.”
“Yeah, Tom really fucked up a good thing.” I reached over and grabbed her hand in mine. “Kasia, that’s why I wanted to tell you and make sure it’s alright before I made plans with Melanie. I don’t want any secrets screwing things up for us, ok? And if you’re uncomfortable with it, then just say so and I won’t go. I mean it.”
“I know you two are friends and I don’t want to be possessive, so I’d never say no. But Dylan, don’t ever expect the two of us to be friends. Melanie is your friend…she’s no friend of mine.”
“How’s that supposed to make me feel?”
“How it makes you feel?” She was wide-eyed. “Are you kidding? I’m trying not to feel insecure about you wanting to spend time with her. It’s enough that I’ll tolerate you hanging out with—,” she lowered her voice to a whisper and leaned in closer to me, “someone you’ve fucked, Dylan. Remember,” she mocked, “you’ve had sex with the girl? Don’t ask me for more than that. Don’t ask me to pretend that she’s a nice person or that she isn’t an absolute bitch to me when you’re not around. Sorry, Dylan, but I’m not fake. You want to console your friend, be her shoulder to cry on…go ahead. I had no choice—I had to interact with her when we were at school but I’m out of school now. I choose not to spend time with people that I dislike.”
She was on fire. What had been a casual chat a minute ago was now a full-on bitch-fest. “Kasia, I won’t go.”
She threw her head back, exasperated. “How did we get here?” Calmer, a moment later she said, “You want me to tell you that I’m fine with it? I’m fine with it.” Shaking her head she said, “God, I was so happy yesterday, so happy to finally see you again and now I feel like crap.”
“Shit, I wish I never started this.”
“But you did.” She stood up then and gestured for us to leave. “I’m alright, ok? Now if you didn’t go I’d feel like some pathetic, jealous witch. You’re going and let’s just change the subject, ok? I’m done talking about this.”
I raked my hands over my face. I was angry at myself for bringing it up but also annoyed by her reaction. But really, what did I expect? If she told me she wanted to go out with some guy she’d slept with, I wouldn’t be overjoyed either. I held the door open for her and whispered, “Kasia, I love you.”
“I don’t need to be reassured. Listen, Dylan, I appreciate that you came all the way out here to tell me—to be up front about it. I do. But can we just call it a night? I have a busy day tomorrow. I’m meeting my brother at six-thirty before he goes to work.”
“Is it about the store?”
She nodded, cheerless. “We checked it out last week. It looks promising but he wants to see it again before I speak to my father about it. He wants to have a firm estimate of the renovation costs.”
I was trying to be upbeat, to end the night on a good note. “That’s good, Kasia, right?”
She smiled weakly. “It is.”
Her tone told me she was done. She wanted me to leave. “Ok, I’m gonna head back.” I took her hands in mine. “I am sorry, Kasia, I was just trying to—”
“I know, Dylan. I trust you. We’re good.”
“Can I see you tomorrow night after work?”
“Dylan, you can’t drive out here every night. I’m ok, really. I need to get some work done and you have to put in some long hours at the office so let’s just plan on seeing each other Friday night, ok?” She was telling me she needed some space. We had just been apart for two weeks and she needed distance from me.
Kasia
Dylan left, looking dejected, and I had anger simmering so close to the surface that I felt as if I could explode. That girl was poison as far as I was concerned. I thought after graduation that I was done with her but apparently not. I was angry at myself too—angry that I wasn’t able to be all cool and confident about Dylan seeing Melanie. Instead, I came off like a jealous, spiteful girl who didn’t possess a self-assured bone in her body.
Every day that week we spoke on the phone. I acted as if our conversation Sunday night hadn’t happened. I told him details about the potential store site, the successful conversations with my father, and Alex’s thoughts about renovation expenses. I talked incessantly and silently begged for him not to bring up the sore topic again. He didn’t. Thursday afternoon he called and asked me where the band was playing and if he could meet me there later that night. As casually as I could manage, I answered, “No. You have plans tonight, Dylan, and so do I. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Being with Darcy took my mind off of Melanie. If Darcy could plaster a smile on her face and be social, the least I could do was show her a good time. We actually wound up dancing, drinking a little too much, and having a great night. Sophia’s brother was drop-dead gorgeous and totally interested in Darcy; she may—or may not have—made out with him late-night. Sophia told me the next day, though, that Darcy had told Anthony an abridged version of her current situation and the two parted as friends. Anthony’s band was really good and I had a great time hanging out with Darcy and seeing Michal and Sophia so obviously happy together. Dylan called me a few times over the course of the night but I didn’t answer. I texted back after the third missed call that it was too loud to hear the phone when, truth was, I was being passive aggressive. I wanted to write: You need someone to talk to, Dylan? Talk to that bitch, Melanie. That’s who you chose to spend your night with. Yeah…our date tomorrow night was going to be so much fun.
I woke up Friday morning early and took a long run. I needed to clear my head. I kept saying I wasn’t jealous but I was acting like an easily threatened girl who lacked so much as a shred of self-confidence—that’s not who I was. I decided to suck it up, ask Dylan how everything went, and then move on. Really move on, not just say I was moving on. I’d let that girl ruin my week—ruin the time I had with Dylan after being apart for so long. He’d done nothing but be honest with me and I’d reacted immaturely. I wanted Dylan to be truthful but I’d just given him an entire week’s worth of reasons not to be.
Dylan
I felt like I’d spent the entire week kissing up to Kasia. I called her twice a day; she didn’t call me once. I listened patiently to her go on and on about her life, as if I didn’t have a shitload going on in my own. I wanted to clear the air with her but got the distinct impression that the topic was off limits. So the elephant stayed permanently situated in the room and by Thursday, I was pissed off. I was angry at Kasia and also desperate for her to get over this and to be herself again with me. And I was in no mood to see Melanie; I was pissed at her for managing again, even without knowing it this time, to cause problems between me and Kasia.
Kasia was refusing to call me but Melanie, on the other hand, had sent me no less than ten texts planning our get-together Thursday night. I was meeting her for drinks at the Standard. Since this was supposed to be me cheering up my lonely, down-on-her-luck old friend, I figured that it would just be the two of us. We’d have a few drinks, go our separate ways, and she’d be more settled soon and less needy. Instead, I walked into the lounge where Melanie was holding court with no less than ten of our friends. I scanned the group and noticed Cecilia first, and then Samantha Paulson, Avery Manning, Charlie Price, James Bradford, Delia and Tripp, among others. It was like a Palm Beach reunion.
Awesome.
Melanie ran over and flung her arms around my neck when she saw me. “Dylan! I’ve missed you!”
“What’s all this, Melanie?”
“I know. It’s great, right? The other night, you made me feel so much better. I was in a funk and I needed to snap out of it. What better way to do that than to throw a party, right?”
“I’m glad you’re feeling better, Mel.”
“I am,” she tapped my nose playfully, “and it’s all thanks to you.” Melanie
hooked our arms together and led me to the center of the group. I said my hellos, catching up with everyone, but I wasn’t happy to be there. I felt like being with this crew, Kasia absent, was wrong. And Avery drove the point home when she teased, “I keep hearing about this girlfriend of yours, Dylan, but I’ve never met her. Is she some kind of recluse or are you afraid we can’t play nice?”
Melanie said, loud enough so that Samantha could hear, “Some of you must know Kasia. She’s from New York, after all, and I know she went to Prep on…what, Dylan, scholarship or something?”
I looked at her evenly, “Yes. She had a scholarship there and also to UV, a full academic ride.” I thought that would shut her up but I was wrong. Melanie—all of these people for that matter—didn’t give a crap how high your SAT scores were, they only cared who your family was and how much money you had.
Melanie chirped, “Samantha, didn’t you go to Prep? You must know Kasia.”
“Kasia…,” she attempted to look lost in thought before the light bulb miraculously went on, “Oh yeah…blonde girl, Polish immigrant?”
I couldn’t help but laugh as I shook my head. “Yeah, Samantha, that’s her.” Polish immigrant. What a fucking twat. I guess Darcy and Kasia had read her better than I had.
She caught my tone and was trying to make nice now. “I do remember her, Dylan. She was quiet, though. She didn’t really make an effort to get to know any of us so I can’t say we were good friends.”
Charlie had overheard our exchange. “I remember Kasia Mazur from Prep. She was quiet but really nice and fucking brilliant at math. She used to ruin the curve in AP Calculus all the time.” He laughed. “I hated her and drooled over her at the same time. What’s she up to now?”
“She’s great. She’s in Brooklyn, getting ready to expand a business she started in college.”
Samantha looked like she’d sucked on a lemon and Melanie looked like she was loving every minute of making Samantha miserable—I just didn’t get these girls. Cecilia rested her hand on my arm then and asked, with what seemed like genuine interest, what kind of business it was. Cecilia was apparently into fashion and told me she now “couldn’t wait” to meet Kasia. I, meanwhile, was praying the two would never cross paths.
