"Wow, you really went all out."
He smiled. "Not even close."
They spent the next hours feeding each other, talking about their upbringings, friends, family, and finally, about being a werewolf. When they'd talked themselves out, they wrapped themselves in the blanket and stared at the stars.
"Do you think it's possible to meet someone and have it feel like you've known them your entire life? Like you were meant to meet them?" he asked.
Cara held her breath for a minute, and then nodded. "I think that you can love lots of people and any number of them you might be able to share a good and happy life with. But I also think there might be one special person who, if you are fortunate enough to meet, your soul recognizes from… before we got here."
"A soulmate."
"Exactly."
He hugged her tighter and kissed the top of her head. "I have to tell you Cara. These last weeks with you have made me feel… whole. For the first time in my life I feel complete." He chuckled. “That sounds so lame, I know.”
Cara smiled into his chest and scraped for words. She wanted to tell him that she felt the same, but she couldn't. A dark cloud loomed over her thoughts and she knew she had to tell him. But being in his arms felt so right and once she told him, who knew what would happen between them. So she stayed silent and snuggled closer. She'd tell him tomorrow.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Noah saw too little of Cara over the next week for his liking. She buried herself in schoolwork, then had to work extra shifts at the coffee shop; the new waitress had quit without notice.
He wanted to help her out, but she was too strong and proud to accept financial aid. So he busied himself with therapy and group meetings. He'd even felt good enough to call the Wounded Warrior Internship, for a follow up interview, and he looked online for more about what it took to become a pyrotechnical engineer. Optimism rooted inside him as he looked to the future.
On Friday, Cara came home exhausted and fell into bed with him. Lovemaking had been sporadic but he enjoyed holding her more than anything. Her soothing presence and constant contact held the worst of his nightmares at bay. And when he did have them, she woke him by humming and holding him close until he could breathe again.
They lay naked in his bed and he listened to the rhythmic sound of her breathing.
"A group of us are going down to the Santa Monica Pier. Want to go?" Her words came out sleepy and slurred. "I could use a mini vacation away from work and school."
He hadn't been in a crowd since the mall incident, just over two weeks ago. But he had been going to therapy, and group, and things were better.
"I want to go if you're going."
She yawned loudly. "I should warn you, the pier is made of planks and sometimes it can be uneven or slick when walking."
He hugged her. "Then I'll have to hang on to you all the tighter."
Her reply was mumbled into his chest as her body relaxed. Words climbed up his throat, threatening to strangle him.
He waited until her breathing evened out again before kissing her head. "I think I love you," he whispered into her hair.
Every muscle in his body unwound as he put the words out there. It'd taken him a year to tell Brigette he loved her and even that hadn't compared to what he felt for Cara. It was crazy to think he'd fallen for her, so completely, in such a short time but he couldn't deny it. He loved Cara. He loved her smile and sweetness. He loved how strong, yet vulnerable she was. He loved the way she worked hard and didn't give him an inch. He loved every last piece of her.
A protective instinct crawled over his limbs and took root deep in his chest, awakening a strange sensation within him. A presence that was himself, yet not. Deep inside something stirred, and stretched, and grew. His wolf.
He rubbed his chest as the beast paced back and forth, pouring its aggression into him, doubling his protective instincts. The sensation elated and terrified him.
Noah jolted awake the next morning, his heart racing. He sucked in hard, heavy breaths, body shaking, trying to focus as the smell of gunpowder and sand filled his senses.
He sniffed the air as his palm splayed on the bed, but all he felt were cool sheets. The smell of cooking eggs wafted from the kitchen. He blew out a harsh breath and relaxed a fraction. He was in Malibu, in the condo with Cara.
The sound of her light footsteps on the carpet had him perplexed. How could he hear her?
"You're up! I made breakfast." She carried in two plates of food and set one in front of him.
He gave her a weak smile as she sat down next to him.
Her smile fell and she searched his face. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." He looked at the plate of eggs, whole wheat toast, and fresh fruit. "Looks great. Thanks."
Her hand fell lightly on his thigh. "Noah? Is it your leg? Do you want me to rub it for you?”
His head told him to suck it up. Keep it to himself. Don't show weakness. But his therapy had been teaching him to express his feelings.
"Bad dream is all. I'm all right.”
She caressed his face and ran her fingers through his hair. "Same one?"
"Nope. Different this time. I'm not even sure what this one meant really. It's all good though. I'm fine," he lied.
She watched him but he refused to meet her gaze. Instead he took her hand, bowed his head and prayed over the food. She even said, "Amen" when he finished.
"So what time do we leave?" He dug into his eggs and scooped them onto his toast.
"Everyone's meeting down at the carousel around ten. Which gives us an hour to get on the road."
He bit into the eggs and his tastebuds exploded. "Holy crow. What did you do to these?"
She smiled. "You like 'em? My mama used to make 'em like that. Turmeric, onions, tomatoes and spinach."
"They're great."
"Well, then I did my mama proud."
They ate quickly and got ready but the bad dream, and the response it evoked, sat heavy on his shoulders souring his thoughts.
They pulled away from the condo after nine and headed down the highway, toward Santa Monica. The Pacific Coast Highway hugged the coastline; the drive was as beautiful as the creature sitting next to him.
"Have you been to the pier before?" she asked.
"Not the Santa Monica Pier."
"There's a great place, called Bubba Gump's. If you like seafood."
"I do."
"There's also a small amusement park but I'm not one for heights so I'll just watch if you guys want to go."
"Is there anything you like to do?"
"The aquarium. And the carousel. Plus there's the beach so we can go down in the water."
He nodded but the idea of taking off his leg in front of so many people had him twitchy.
They parked on the pier and got out. The smell of the salt air mixed with the scent of fried food, sweat, and suntan oil. Noah stood for a minute, taking in all the sounds and smells, trying to tamp down his anxiety as he stuck a lollipop into his mouth.
"Are you okay?" Cara asked.
"I can smell everything."
She looked up and mumbled to herself for a minute, then nodded. "The full moon is a few days off. Your senses are getting sharper."
"But not you?"
"No." She tucked a curl behind her ear. "Not me."
He took her hand and together they walked across the pier, to the carousel building. He leaned on her heavily, trying to get a feel for the uneven terrain.
"Man, this is almost as bad as walking on sand."
"But it's good for you too. New experience. Learning how to walk on it. Feeling it. Adjusting."
"True."
He held open the door and they walked inside the glass building. The bright lights of the carousel flashed and the loud, high-pitched music pierced his eardrums.
"There they are." Cara waved to the group and they walked over to meet them. "Hey." She hugged Natasha and Liam. Clint, Rock, Buck, and the other girls, from the night at the p
izza parlor, were also there.
"So what's everyone up for?" asked Clint.
"I want to ride the carousel," said a redheaded girl; Noah couldn't remember her name.
"Then let's do it."
"I get the unicorn," called Cindy.
Liam crossed to Noah and stuck out his hand. "How you holdin' up?"
"Not bad. Better actually." He shook Liam's hand.
"Good to hear. The full moon is gettin' close. You feeling its affects yet?"
"This morning. Exaggerated hearing, smell, stuff like that."
Liam nodded. "If it gets overwhelming, let me know. I'll try to talk you through it."
"I appreciate that." He bit into his lollipop.
"And if you need a place to run, you're welcome to come out with us."
"Again. Thanks." Noah hadn’t even thought about where he’d run.
Liam clapped him on the shoulder; it looked like he might say more but instead he walked to Natasha. Together they paid for tickets with the rest of the group.
The high-pitched music began again; it was like a lightning strike to his brain. Noah dug his fists into his pockets. He had to keep it together today. He wouldn't ruin Cara's day off. Or embarrass her in front of her friends.
****
Cara rode the carousel with the group twice, keeping her eyes on Noah, who stood at the rail, watching and waving every time she went around. She couldn't help but notice his smile didn't reach his eyes and tension rolled off him in waves.
"Are you sure you're okay?" she asked, for the third time, as they pet a sea cucumber in the aquarium.
"I'm fine." His voice held a jovial note but his eyes darted back and forth, taking in every person in the tight quarters.
Rock splashed water and Buck bumped into Noah, making him jolt and shove Buck.
"Okay!" She planted her hands on Noah's chest. "Why don't we go outside for a minute to get some air?"
Buck and Rock stared at them and Noah's gaze dropped. "Sorry," he mumbled.
Clint stepped between them and punched Buck in the shoulder. "No problem. We know how tense it can get around the full moon."
Buck held out his hand. "No hard feelings."
Noah swallowed hard, shook Buck's hand and then looked at Cara. "I think air would be great."
"We'll catch up with you guys in an hour okay?" she called to Liam.
Liam raised a hand. "We'll meet at Bubba Gump's."
Cara took Noah's hand and they walked out of the aquarium, up the ramp, and across the sand to the shops that lined the beach.
"Sorry," he said.
"You want to talk about it?" She shielded her eyes with her hand as she looked up at him.
He pulled her to a small wall overlooking a park where kids ran around playing.
"The nightmare. It wasn't like the others but it started like them. And everything just smells stronger, and the music is too loud, and there's people everywhere…"
"So the full moon mixed with what you're going through." She reached over and rubbed his ear.
He closed his eyes and hung his head. “I didn't want to ruin your day."
"You’re not. We're here and we're together, nothing's ruined. But if it's too much, I understand; we can go home."
"No. I want to get out. I need to." His beautiful eyes connected with hers, making her pulse quicken. She never tired of the way he looked at her, or the way her body responded.
"Why don't we walk down by the shops for a bit? It's less crowded."
He cupped her cheek. "What did I do to deserve you?"
She chuckled. "What did I do to deserve you?"
He kissed her and butterflies fluttered in her stomach. The sound of kids giggling made her smile. Two little boys watched them. One had sandy hair, like Noah and she wondered what his kids would look like.
Her cheeks heated. Where had that come from?
"Hey guys!"
Cara and Noah sat at the end of a table near the exit of Bubba Gump's. The group welcomed them without question or accusation and a familiar, yet long forgotten feeling bloomed inside Cara. The feeling of family and belonging.
"So Noah," said Clint. "I hear you're an engineer."
"Yes, sir. Combat engineer."
Clint chuckled. "Man, that is so funny to hear someone else call me that. Usually I'm the one saying 'Yes, sir' to my dad."
"Habit."
"It's cool. So what kind of stuff did you do?"
"I was a jack of all trades. Mobility, counter mobility, survivability."
"Meaning what?" asked Cindy.
"I built SWA huts and other buildings out there for Marines. Laid concrete or fixed airfields. My favorite was demolition though. Blowing in doors to houses and buildings and stuff.”
"You wanna keep doing that?" asked Clint.
"It's something I thought about pursuing. I wouldn't know where to start though."
"Well, in Hollywood it's all about who you know. With your expertise, and some on-the-job-training, I’m sure it wouldn't take much to help you become a pyrotechnical engineer. I'll introduce you to my dad. He's always on the look out for good crew."
"I'd really appreciate that. Thanks."
Noah looked over at Cara and squeezed her hand under the table. The group was really making an effort to include Noah. And her.
They ordered food and everyone drank some sort of fruity cocktail or beer; everyone except for her and Noah. They sipped lemonade and talked about the upcoming fourth of July. Noah had been invited to spend the day with Tate, Donovan, and the rest of the vets at Night Shift Relocation.
"Fireworks are hard for a lot of guys. I'm not sure how I'll react, so I figured I'd go hang out with them for the day. They go camping far enough away from the fireworks that they can hear and see them, but they’re not in your face."
"I get it."
"I'd invite you," he said. "But I think it's just a guy thing."
"You don't have to explain or invite me. I'm fine with you going. We're not conjoined twins or anything."
"I just don't want you to feel left out."
She snorted. "Uh… I don't drag you along to my classes with me. You should know by now that I'm not one of those girls. I expect you to have a life outside of me."
"What if I don't want to?"
The serious tenor of his voice made her chest squeeze tight, like a steel boned corset. She opened her mouth but couldn't find words. She wanted nothing more than to be a permanent part of his life. But to do that, she had to tell him. Tonight. She had to tell him as soon as they got home.
He chuckled and kissed her forehead. "Did I scare you off?"
"Nope." She couldn't help but beam up at him. "Not at all."
After lunch, they headed out the door, toward the beach. The rest of the group stripped down by the showers on the sand.
"We don't have to go down to the water," she offered.
"True. But we can still sit with everyone."
The feel of him needing her gave her warm fuzzies, all the way down to her toes.
Barking caught Cara's attention. She turned to see a large German Shepherd running up the beach, straight at them.
"Marshall, heel!" A man ran behind, trying to catch up to the dog.
Noah's entire body went rigid as the dog advanced heading right for her.
"No!" Noah shouted. He jumped in front of Cara shielding her with his body. The dog barked and snarled. Noah stepped forward and bared his teeth, staring the dog down. It continued to growl but the owner caught up and grabbed the dog by the collar.
"I'm so sorry," he said. "He's never like that."
"You better keep that thing leashed." Liam strode over. "Wouldn't want him to get hurt." Liam stared at the dog. It whimpered and its tail disappeared between its legs.
"I'm sorry. Honestly. Come on." The owner pulled the dog away.
Liam's hand landed lightly on Cara's shoulder. "Are you all right?"
"Yeah." She shook herself, trying to tamp down the adrenaline cou
rsing through her veins. She looked up at Noah who continued to stare at the retreating dog.
"Hey." She slipped her hand into his, but he shook it off.
Liam's expression darkened.
Fear crept into her mind and wrapped its itchy fingers around her brain.
"Noah?" She stepped in front of him blocking his vision of the dog. He looked through her for a moment before his gaze cleared.
He blinked several times and his face paled. "Cara."
She looked to Liam and nodded. "It's okay. I got this."
She took Noah by the arm and led him to the shadow of Bubba Gump's. He leaned back against the wall and took several deep breaths.
She watched him in silence for a moment and then laid her hand on his chest. "Noah. Look at me."
His eyes darted to hers, then away.
She wracked her brain for something, anything to help.
"Five things you can see," she blurted.
His gaze focused on her face.
"Five things you can see," she repeated.
He swallowed and looked around. "Sand, seagulls, water, Cara's eyes, Bubba Gump's."
"Four things you can feel."
"Knife, wood, wind, Cara's hand."
She kept her gaze locked on his. "Three things you can hear."
"Waves crashing, kids laughing, tires on the planks." His body relaxed, pressing into the wood of the building.
"Two things you can smell."
"Coconut sunscreen, seaweed."
"One thing you can taste."
"Leftover lemonade."
He grabbed her and pulled her to him. "That dog. It ran at you and all of a sudden all I could think of was keeping you safe," he said.
"It's okay. Nothing happened. It's a perk of our DNA. Dogs don't particularly like us but if it comes to a fight, they'll back down."
He pushed her gently, putting her at arm's length. "If anything had happened to you–"
"I'm fine. Nothing happened. You protected me."
He kissed her and then pulled her into a hug. "Everything came rushing back. Afghanistan, the dog, the bomb, all of it. And all I could think was, not Cara. I don't care if it takes me, but not Cara."
Cursed by the Moon (Shifter Rising Book 2) Page 10
