by Tl Reeve
However, it didn’t negate her inability to trust anyone, especially him. Skittish as a newborn calf, she shied away from his advances, hiding behind an emotional wall she built around herself. He didn’t take it to heart though. His family had been gone a long time and only returned to the old homestead on the outskirts of Los Lobos recently. He’d started a full-court press a few weeks after returning, making sure he put himself into positions where they’d run into each other outside of her home office.
So far, he spent more time nodding and saying “ma’am” or “sugar” than he did making a physical connection with the woman he already called mate. That was where his little project came into play. When Drew announced the Solstice activities, Kalum knew his chance had finally arrived to win Fawn over. But how? His sister recommended he try asking her out or bringing her lunch, since she seemed to work all the time. His brother suggested banging the hell out of her and marking her. Why he asked Graham anything, he didn’t know. The charismatic playboy didn’t believe in settling down or mating. However, his sister sent him to a site called Pinterest. She told him about all these handmade gifts even a layman could make. The minute he opened the site and typed in what he was looking for, a plan took root. By the time he finished presenting her with his handmade gifts, he hoped she’d agreed to accompany him to the festivities. If he was lucky enough to mate her, well, he considered it a bonus.
The sound of gravel crunching under tires along with the rattle of a diesel engine rumbling down the small path had him glancing up. The winter sunshine glinted off the windshield of Chris’s black dually truck parked behind Kalum’s truck. Wearing insulated coveralls and a tan Stetson, his six foot four inch friend—and vet—towered over the door of his pickup. He crossed the distance in a few strides and they shook hands.
“Glad you could make it out early today. I’ve got some stuff to do later on,” Kalum said.
“Not a problem. How many are we doing today?” Chris asked, leaning against the truck.
“Thirty. Graham is going to push them to the chutes then we’ll work on them one at a time.”
“Sounds good.”
His brother rode over the ridge in the distance, their Border collie, Kip, happily trotting alongside. As a kid, it had seemed strange having a cattle ranch, knowing they were Wolves, but his dad had told him a little secret.
If you show the cattle you mean no harm, they’ll always trust you. The minute you break their trust is the minute you shut down the farm and try something else.
“You’re staying for breakfast, right? Lily is already in the kitchen cooking away on it.”
“I could grab a bite,” Chris answered. “Is she making her famous gravy and biscuits?”
“For you, the girl would make anything,” he replied. “Come on, we’ll take your truck. Looks like Graham’s in position to start moving the herd.”
They got into the dually and waited as Kip yipped and started running for the cows. Graham followed her and began moving them slowly but surely toward the chutes. Chris inched his way through the pasture, maintaining a distance from both Graham and the cattle so not to spook them. “Have you implemented your plan yet?”
“Yep. Gave her the first gift yesterday.”
“Does she know it’s from you?” Chris stopped momentarily while Kalum’s brother wrangled a straggler.
“No. I am doing this anonymously. I don’t want her to know till the final step.”
“You know,” Chris stated, “this could blow up in your face.”
“I’ve thought about that scenario at least a hundred times. If it happens, it happens. But, I have a good feeling about this.” Chris stopped the truck a few feet from the round pen Graham was closing. “Besides,” he said, getting out of the vehicle, “what I have planned for day four is going to blow her mind. There’s no way she’ll be able to say no.”
“If you say so, man.”
With the last of the cattle vaccinated, they were back in the truck and headed for the house. The sky had gone from a cobalt blue to cloudy. In the span of an hour the clouds had grown heavier, turning a light shade of purple. Large, thick snowflakes floated to the ground piling up quickly. The tracks leading out to the pasture were slowly disappearing under the onslaught of snow.
“Come on,” Kalum said as he got out. “Don’t need to be caught outside in this shit. I hope you don’t have any more appointments this morning.”
“Nope.” Chris followed him up the walkway to the front door. “I knew it was coming and canceled everything except tending to your cows.”
Kalum stepped into the house and pulled off his heavy jacket then hung up his hat. “Coffee?”
“Yes.” His friend pulled off his gloves and jacket on their way into the kitchen. “Good morning, Lily.”
Kalum’s sister’s turned the bacon in the pan with a pair of tongs. “Chris.”
“Coffee ready?” Kalum asked.
“Yeah, in the pot,” she said. “Where’s Graham?”
“On his way.”
“Good,” she said. “Breakfast is almost done. Sit.”
“Kalum said you made me gravy and biscuits this morning,” Chris said, dropping his jacket on the back of a chair before sitting.
“I might have made some biscuits,” she hedged.
“And some gravy?”
“Kalum needs to keep his big mouth shut.” Lily turned from the stove and pointed the tongs at Chris. “I didn’t make it for you. I made it for my brothers.”
“What did you make for us?” Graham stepped through the back door. Kip yipped then trotted over to Chris and sat down.
“Biscuits and gravy. Your sister is under the impression I’m not supposed to have any.” Mirth filled Chris’s eyes. “I’m inclined to believe she’s lying.”
Graham snorted. “That’s because you eat it all.”
“I can’t help it. Your sister is a great cook.” He shrugged. “Come on, doll, my stomach is touching my backbone here.”
Lily chuckled and shook her head. “You don’t look like you’ve ever missed a meal.”
Kalum noticed something dim in his friend’s eyes. He knew a little bit about Chris’s childhood, but he didn’t talk about it much. When their parents left, Chris’s stayed. Not more than a few years later, Chris left Miss Fern and Henry behind to go to school and get away from the shit Magnum was doing. Kalum still didn’t understand why the elder pack members remained the whole time. “Well, you need to hurry it up with the food. I’m so hungry, I could eat an elk.”
“You were always the exaggerator, Kalum.” She brought Chris a loaded plate despite her threats. “And you always tried to get more than your share.”
“That’s because I was always hungry.”
“And Mom always slapped your hands with a wooden spoon if you went back for seconds before everyone else was fed.” Graham walked over to the stove and grabbed his biscuits and some of the sausage gravy. “I think you should do the same, Lily.”
“I might have to,” she teased. “So, how did it go with the cattle this morning?” She fed Kip a piece of bacon then joined everyone at the table. “Any problems?”
“Nothing,” Chris said. “Thankfully the weather held off till we were on the way back.” He watched Lily pick up her cup and take a sip of coffee. Even Graham sat up a bit more at the way their friend eyed their sister.
“That’s good,” she replied. “Are you planning to join the pack for the run?”
“I was thinking about it.”
“Well, we know Kalum will be there, more than likely pining away for Fawn,” Graham quipped.
“Or, if my plans work, I’ll be with my mate,” Kalum drawled. “Unlike you who sneaks off to Rapid City every weekend.”
“Variety is the spice of life.” Graham shrugged.
Lily rolled her eyes. “You’re such a pig.”
“Better to get some than nothing at all, little sis,” Graham replied.
> “Spoken like a true Wolf,” she snarked.
“You mean to tell me,” Chris said, narrowing his eyes, “in all the time you’ve been home, you’ve not gone out and had sex?”
“Not once,” she answered quickly. “I don’t have the same urges as you, obviously.” She lifted her cup and took another sip of her coffee. “Besides, what is it good for? A quick itch scratched, and….”
“Among other things, sure.” Chris didn’t take his gaze off her, and Kalum had a gut feeling he knew why.
“Anyway,” Kalum said, trying to break the heady wave of dominant power racing through the space. “It should be fun this…festival. I heard the human mates have been acting like a bunch of kids in a candy store.”
“Me, too,” Lily said, dragging her attention away from Chris. “I heard Betty and Ginger talking about it. Something about a surprise for Kole, I think.”
“Well, I’d better be going.” Chris wiped his mouth with his napkin then took his plate to the sink. “If you need anything, Kalum….”
“Yeah, I’ll call,” he answered.
“See you around, doll.” Chris walked to the back door. “Graham.”
“Chris.” Graham nodded. With a snick of the door closing, he turned to their sister. “You know he has a thing for you, right?”
“Sucks to be him.” Lily sighed before standing up and heading out of the kitchen.
***
By midday, Kalum finally had a chance to grab the laptop from Lily’s office and carry it into the kitchen. Between him and Graham, they’d shoveled the walkway a couple of times, and he’d checked on the cattle periodically. The connection to the Internet was a bit slow due to the snow, but he wouldn’t be on for long. The informative YouTube channel he needed for the recipe he was about to create sat ready, and he had all the fixings in front of him. He hit play on his laptop and went to work. Layering each ingredient in the jar, he shifted the contents, settling them until all that was left to do was add the regular-sized marshmallows on top.
The hot cocoa recipe made enough to fill two mugs and the instructions suggested adding a bonus single-serving bottle of Bailey’s. When he went looking through the gift ideas, he’d stumbled upon the mix. All the users who shared the pin also commented on how good it was. Since Fawn seemed determined to try a new thing every week, he figured, what the hell. She might like it. Tying the miniature alcohol bottle to the lip of the jar with a red ribbon, he screwed the top on then opened his Word program.
He didn’t want her to know it was him for several reasons. First and foremost, she’d reject the gifts, and second, she’d hide from him even more than she already did. It was a defensive thing, but it stung nonetheless. He had to draw her out of her veil of security and make her want to experience life.
He understood her need for privacy and unwillingness to put herself out there. Anyone carrying burn scars knew the damage they did to a person’s body and their self-esteem. Add in the fact her legs had been broken and repaired a few times…. Shit, he’d understand if she wanted to be a hermit the rest of her life. However, his little mate was a fighter. She didn’t dwell. She didn’t throw a pity party. She kept going, even if it was at a relatively slow pace, with marked mini-achievements. He saw her as a strong woman with an iron will. A lion in sheep’s clothing.
Now it was up to him to show her how strong she really was. Loading a piece of parchment into his printer, he settled in and began to type the quote he’d found the day before while scouring the Internet.
Life holds special magic for those who dare to dream.
What are your dreams, Fawn?
Imagine one of your favorites and grab onto it with both hands.
Hold it close. Believe in it. Make it happen.
He placed the note along with the jar into the box then taped it shut. At nightfall, he left his rambling home and drove out to Fawn’s place. After parking the truck a good distance away, Kalum stripped and shifted. He stretched out his large black frame and grabbed the string attached to the box gently between his teeth. Trotting down the path to her home, he kept to the shadows. Careful not to alert her, he peered into the window of her living room.
She sat huddled on the couch, the soft glow of her lamp illuminating the book on her lap. A soft throw covered her legs, and the fire in the fireplace flickered. The scent of burning pine drifted on the night air, filling his senses. He could stand there for hours and watch her. Explore everything which made her happy, but this was a mission. He didn’t want to get caught nor did he want to upset her. Dropping the package, he scratched the door once then took off back the way he came, not waiting to see if she answered.
As he pulled his clothes back on after returning to his truck, he took one more look down the lane leading to her house and grinned. Three more days and he’d make her his. He’d teach her how to grab those dreams and ride them off into the sunset. He’d give her everything just to see her happy and in love.
Chapter Three
The scratching sound drew Fawn’s attention to the back door. When the sound didn’t come again, she got up and peered through the blinds. On her porch, lay another box. Should she open the door and pick it up? Should she leave it there? Her conversation with Tinks replayed in her mind. This could be a good thing.
She never got presents. Her parents had long since passed. Her brother had left and showed no sign of returning home. Who would give her something? She warred with herself over something silly. It was obvious someone desired her attention. The whys didn’t matter. No one, hopefully, would hurt her again. Maybe Tinks had been right.
Yet, she didn’t trust herself enough to give in to the little spark of happiness. One thing might lead to another, and, if she were put back into the same situation, she’d die. This time she wouldn’t come back from the trauma, the mental anguish. As it was, had Tinks not convinced her to start her own small company, she’d still be hiding. The thought of trying to find Kru and move in with him entered her mind, too.
Still, staying seemed easier, and perhaps Magnum had been right. She was weak. She didn’t take chances. She hadn’t pleased her family. Him. She wasn’t special and had no hidden talents. Even as a child, she’d kept to herself. It had made her easy pickings for a deranged Alpha. Enough of the pity party, Fawn. Yes, it was. That was her past, this was now. So, what is the Fawn of now going to do about the package outside getting snowed on?
She opened the door, grabbed the large box, and brought it inside. The plain brown box had no markings of any kind on it. A piece of twine had been wrapped around it and…. No way. She sniffed the box and swore she caught the hint of leather and aftershave. She sniffed it again but this time all she smelled was cardboard. Weird. Cutting the twine off, she then pulled off the tape and opened the box. Another note sat on top of a jar. She put the parchment aside and grabbed the Mason jar.
Fawn laughed. Hot chocolate and a bottle of Bailey’s. She loved cocoa; it was a staple in her home. She grabbed the paper included in the parcel and read it. A smile floated across her lips. Dreams. As a child, she’d had so many. She wanted to be a doctor or a scientist. Then a model and a songwriter. She’d been fifty feet tall and invincible. She wished she could go back to her wide-eyed innocence. Unfortunately, those times were so long ago and the reality of life was pretty simple. It wasn’t easy, and it wasn’t nice. It was rough and hard. It was about sacrifices and defeats. Mini triumphs. Being brokenhearted and lonely.
God, she hated being a Debbie Downer.
She filled her teapot and placed it on the stove then read the instructions on the card.
Again, she sniffed the jar. All she scented were the contents. Chocolate, powdered milk, cinnamon, some other things, and marshmallows. So why did she feel disappointed? Damn it, Tinks. Her suggestion that Kalum was the secret admirer ran on a repeat loop through her mind. Would he do this? And if he had, why? He could have any of the females or even find a human. Someone untouched or unmarred.
>
Even if she did like him. Okay, more than liked him. She’d be nothing special for him. She’d hold him back and make him a laughingstock.
What would it be like to wake up next to him? To be happy with him? To kiss him. Those full, tempting lips that always curled into a sensual smirk when he teased her. Would the kiss be hard and demanding or soft and gentle? She wondered if his calloused fingers would rasp over her skin when he touched her. What he sounded like in the throes of passion.
She knew instinctively he wouldn’t be cruel. He’d love her. Give her pleasure. He’d wipe away all the fear of being with a man after being mentally and physically tortured. If she only had the courage to grasp the dreams written in the note. As much as she thought her little challenges were making her stronger, she didn’t feel like they were. She still stayed home most of the time. She hadn’t been on a date, nor had she attempted any type of affection with a man. So, in her book, she was still a coward.
The whistle of her teapot brought her out of her thoughts. She grabbed the mug and the jar and proceeded to make herself a cup of hot chocolate. She added a generous dollop from the Bailey’s bottle and went back to her book. She could have more, if she took the first step. Fear made her stomach knot, but a bit of wide-eyed wonder she’d suppressed for so many years broke free and whispered, Try.
Fawn took a sip of the hot, sweet goodness and moaned. Okay, she’d try. She’d play this game for as long as it lasted. She’d step out of her self-imposed hell and live. What was the worst that could happen? Not like someone would hurt her. Those days were gone. Drew didn’t stand for it anymore.
