"I see. Well, I hope you're not spending all your time studying! Have you made any new friends?"
A sheepish smile spreading across her face, Abby looked over at Mia, who sat on her bed with her elbow resting on one bent knee and her other leg extended off the edge of the mattress. She'd taken off her boots to reveal bare feet with bright orange polish on her toes. She wore tight black leggings and a full skirt with lace underneath. On top she wore a tight, low-cut royal blue waffle-weave shirt with a black and white floral scarf loosely tied around her neck so that it partially obscured her cleavage.
Abby imagined running her fingertip down that dark crevice, the part she could see. And she wondered what was underneath the shirt, specifically what kind of bra was giving Mia’s breasts such a perky, come-hither look. I should not be having these thoughts while on the phone with my mother, that's for damn sure, she lamented. "Yeah, Mom, I met this girl Maddy who lives in my dorm and another friend, Mia, who is in my English Comp class. She's over here right now and I'm helping her with her paper."
"That's great!" Sarah approved. "I'm really glad to hear that you're making friends. Hey, I was calling to share some news with you."
Abby's chest involuntarily tightened at the sound of "some news." It sounded just vague enough to be bad, like maybe something had happened to Owen or James was getting deployed again. "What is it?" she
squeaked out nervously.
"Nothing bad!" Sarah reassured her, detecting the concern in her daughter's voice. "It's good news actually. Or at least we think it is!"
"Well, what is it?" Abby pressed. Like her mother, patience had never been her strong suit.
"James and I recently underwent fertility treatment and...." she paused dramatically, "we're having twins!"
"What?!" was the only word Abby could squeeze out. And then: "Seriously?"
"Yes, seriously. We're due at the end of June, but the babies would probably come earlier in the month since there are two.”
“I just don't even know what to say!" Abby laughed. "This is awesome. Congratulations to both of you!"
"Thank you," Sarah said, smiling. She was thankful that Abby sounded surprised, but sincerely happy. She was worried that she wouldn't be supportive. "Hopefully you'll be home for summer break before they come! I'm probably going to need some help."
Abby froze. First, she couldn't envision herself taking care of a newborn, and secondly, she wasn't sure if she wanted to go home for the summer. Of course, she'd want to visit and see her mom, grandmother,
Owen and James, and meet her new brothers or sisters, but the closer she drew to Mia, the more compelled she felt to stay.
But then the pragmatic, devil’s advocate side of her brain jumped to attention. I haven't even made it through the first semester yet, she thought. I might be jumping the gun. She looked over at Mia again, who was enjoying eavesdropping on the conversation. She looked excited, like she knew something really extraordinary was happening.
"Well, I am really happy for you guys. This is going to be cool," she said. "Okay, Mia and I better get back to her paper!"
"Of course. Well, good luck with that and call me if you need anything!"
Abby disconnected from the call after exchanging the traditional "I love you’s" with her mom. And then: "Oh. My. God." she said, making Mia's eyes grow.
"What is it?"
"So get this. My mom is pregnant with twins!"
"What? Isn't she too old for that?"
"She's thirty-nine. Her husband is only thirty-two though, and he doesn't have any kids," Abby explained.
"Wow, younger man, huh? Go Abby's Mom." Mia laughed. "What does your mom do, anyway?"
"She's a sociology professor. James is in the Army."
"That's super cool," Mia said. "Hmm. Good for them."
Yeah, good for them, Abby echoed in her head. Owen's probably happy. And Grandma has gotta be ecstatic. Twins. Wow, what a crazy ride they're in for. She felt completely removed from it all. An outsider looking in.
***
Something about Esther Thompson looked different. Her normally perfectly coiffed hair looked a bit frazzled, with some strays sticking up from her scalp. Her cuticles were ragged and as though she’d been picking at them. There were dark purple circles under her eyes. Still, she sat as primly as ever in the chair across from Sarah's desk. "I've decided to do something about religion and feminism," she announced.
Sarah almost choked on the swallow of water that was traveling down her esophagus. She found that after giving up coffee, she needed to drink water all day to keep her awake. And when she wasn't about to doze off, she was in the bathroom relieving her overburdened bladder. I can only imagine how much worse that's going to get once these babies get bigger, she thought.
"That topic is pretty broad, Esther. I think you're going to have to narrow it down quite a bit. And you'll also need to think about the human subjects element. How will you conduct a study here on campus that correlates to your topic?"
Esther produced a stack of printed PDF journal articles she'd gotten from the library. "I met with the librarian as you suggested and we printed out these." She handed the stack over to Sarah.
Sarah thumbed through them and noticed they were mostly from Christian magazines, not from academic journals. She saw a few lines stating that women enjoyed a special status in the Christian faith, a place of reverence and admiration, à la the Virgin Mary. "And after all, the church is the Bride of Christ," the article concluded. Another was titled "More Precious Than Rubies," which was referenced from Proverbs 3:15.
Sarah was no biblical scholar. "I'll have to take a look at these more closely," she said, trying to process the text at lightning speed. "What point do you want to make about religion and feminism?" She was almost afraid to hear the answer.
"That they're not diametrically opposed," Esther replied as if she’d been practicing saying that phrase. "That religions exalt women, not oppress them. At least Christianity. I'll have to do more research the others."
Sarah rolled that thought around in her head as it violently collided with everything she'd ever learned about religion, but she maintained her neutral, professorial tone. "That's an interesting theory. And how do you plan to relate it to students here on campus?"
"That's the part I'm having trouble figuring out," she admitted, her cheeks flushing just slightly from embarrassment. Sarah imagined that Esther was the type who hated not having all the answers.
"The methodology is due very soon," Sarah said, looking at the calendar.
"I know."
"You'll need some scholarly sources. Most of these are not. The librarian should have covered how to distinguish between popular and scholarly. And I would like you to get a range of viewpoints. Not just those from the Christian perspective, but also from other religions and non-secular journals as well. See if you can find a scholarly treatment of the topic, alright?"
Esther slowly nodded in understanding, but she seemed daunted. Sarah glanced down and noticed that the light on her phone was flashing, indicating a missed call or waiting text. She had a sudden stabbing feeling that something was wrong - with James, with Owen, or with Abby. She told Esther that she would see her next week and waited for the girl to gather her things and exit her office. She swiped her phone to unlock it and there was a missed call from a strange number. Sarah curiously dialed her voicemail and listened to the message. It was from Dale, her mother's boyfriend. Her mother had been rushed to the ER with chest pain.
Sarah felt the adrenaline rush through her system as though she'd mainlined a dozen cups of coffee. She had a class starting in an hour, but there was no way she was going to be able to teach it. She had to get to the hospital. She hated to tell Dr. Knowling there was an emergency and she needed to leave because who knew how many times she might need to play the emergency card before the twins' birth. At only seven weeks pregnant, she hadn't told any of her colleagues yet. But she knew what she must do, so she walked down the hall to
his office.
Dr. Knowling calmly told her not to worry, he would place a sign on her classroom door indicating class was cancelled. She grabbed her purse, keys and phone and sprinted down the hall, picking up even more speed as she galloped down the stairs toward the exit. Her car was a couple of lots away as she'd gotten to campus late. She lamented her decision to wear heels as she dialed James's number to let him know what was going on. "I was just on my way back to Ft. Meade," James said. "Which hospital? I can meet you there."
"University," Sarah replied, her heart pounding so fast she wasn't sure if it was from the alarming news or the rigor of running across campus in high heels. She hoped the stress wasn’t hurting the babies. She imagined them safely cocooned in warmth, their little hearts pumping away. She hoped they were completely oblivious to the frenzy that was happening in the rest of her body.
The wind whipped through the trees and swept fallen leaves up off the sidewalks, tossing them into the air like confetti. She couldn't believe how quickly fall seemed to be losing its color and fading into a state of bone-chilling, pre-winter decay. The sky was layered with foreboding gray clouds which seemed too complacent to threaten rain.
How can this be happening? Sarah thought as she finally made it to her car, unlocked it and clicked the seatbelt fastened. My mom is still young and so healthy. She takes all those herbs and does yoga. She seems in perfect health for her age.
Her mother had been the one constant in her entire life. She had been there since day one, guiding Sarah toward establishing her own identity. She set the example for everything: how to learn, how to love, how to forgive, how to find joy in the tiniest moments. She was the epitome of grace and strength. I would be totally lost without her, Sarah thought, desperately trying to envision life without her mother. She didn't want her twins to be born into a world in which Kathy Lynde would not be one of their guiding forces.
It was an instantaneous flash, a momentary brightness of a wish like a lightning bolt striking her brain. She wondered for a brief speck of time what it would be like to pray to the Biblical God, the God of Esther's faith, to bless her mother, to lift her to His Heart and heal her physical weaknesses. She had never longed for a connection to a higher power before. Kathy Lynde had always filled that role for her.
***
Chapter Seven
Thankful
I'm in the forest and it's lush and green. I see the peaks of the mountains in the distance, decorated with hovering mist, but they’re too far away to worry about reaching today, if ever. There's a contentment that has swallowed me like a last meal. I feel so tired that I must stop to rest, and the banks of the winding creek are too alluring to ignore. I find a spot on the mossy carpet of the forest floor and collapse upon it, my eyes caressing the curve of the brook as it bends toward the deeper, darker recesses of the woods. I want to follow it. And I will. As soon as I rest my weary feet for a few minutes.
Abby awoke with the lush tranquillity of the riverbank still wrapped around her like a warm green blanket. She remembered the curves of the riverbanks as she slowly realized that her body pressed against curves built of silken ivory flesh. Her once-blurry vision came into focus on a field of small, colorful tattoos. The artwork contrasted against creamy skin, tautly stretched over wide hips and a narrow waist, sloping toward feet and shoulders in opposing directions.
The memories of what had transpired while she was encapsulated in the previous night’s darkness soon replaced the images of the dream, but they were no less pleasant. Mia had been a patient, thorough teacher, guiding Abby as she learned where and how to touch and kiss every inch of her luscious body. Now Mia slept, eyes closed in bliss, lips slightly parted, her chest heaving just sightly with each breath. The previous night she had writhed like a serpent under Abby's tongue. Abby had conducted a symphony of seduction which culminated in the thunderous, resonating boom of canons like the finale of the 1812 Overture.
She'd never had quite that experience with Bree. For as sunny and golden as Bree was in the public eye, in private she was sometimes shy and awkward. Of course, Abby's interactions with her had felt natural and genuine, but they were gentle and static, rolling along like a rippling current. There was not the intensity she experienced with Mia, which was more akin to whitewater rafting. It suddenly made her question everything she had felt for Bree. I didn't know what I was missing, she realized. Or maybe we were both just too inexperienced. We were each other’s first “girls.” She got the impression that Mia had been with many girls in her day.
Mia was a work of art, and not just because of the tattoos. With her fingertips, Abby traced her curves which were highlighted by the morning rays of sun streaming through the blinds. Her breasts were full - much larger and softer than Bree's - and her waist was narrow like an hourglass. She had a soft, round tummy that sloped into a triangle of springy black curls. Under the curls, she was shaven smooth. Abby loved the way the soft skin felt under her tongue, like a piece of fruit at the pinnacle of ripeness.
Abby appreciated the way Mia used both her body and her voice to give feedback in bed. Soft sighs of encouragement, back-arching and direct pleas of "More, faster, deeper." Whereas Bree had barely moaned when she came, Mia was like the entire brass section, sending her gratitude up into the heavens like an exultation.
Mia began to stir as Abby continued to reflect on their encounter the night before. She sleepily rolled over and pulled Abby close to her, sliding her leg in between Abby's so that their pelvises nearly met.
Abby could feel the desire beginning to stir inside of her again, like a whirlwind just beginning to twist, borne of the heat radiating from Mia's sex.
Unfortunately, just as she was ready to turn Mia onto her back and take her ripe, pink nipple into her mouth, Abby's phone rang from the nightstand next to her. She thought she'd silenced the ringer and was immediately annoyed that she'd forgotten. She saw it was her mother calling. She never called this early on a Saturday.
Abby was expecting to hear that all hell was breaking loose, but her mother's voice was smooth as glass. "Abigail, I just wanted to let you know that Grandma had a slight heart attack yesterday, but she's okay now."
"What?!"
"Don't worry, sweetie, everything is fine, I just wanted to let you know that she's in the hospital for a few days.”
"She had a heart attack YESTERDAY and you didn't tell me? What the fuck?!" Abby screamed. She couldn't recall ever having used the "f" word in front of her mother before, but she felt like if she didn't, she might channel that energy into throwing her phone across the room. Mia was now wide awake, cowering on the other side of the bed near the wall, hoping to avoid incurring Abby’s wrath.
"Abigail, calm down. I didn't want to worry you before we knew what was going on. But the cardiologist has been to see her now, and she's had some rest, and she’s much better. She is going to have two stents put in on Monday."
"I'm upset that you didn't tell me right away. I may be in Colorado, but I'm still part of this family. Did you call Adam? Did you call Aunt Jenny?"
"I just got off the phone with Aunt Jenny," Sarah answered. "But I called Adam yesterday. It's his mother, Abigail. Please don't get mad. The important thing here is that your grandmother is alive, and she’s going to be fine. Thank the gods for Dale. He may have saved her life!"
Abby sighed. Mia moved closer, putting her hand on Abby's knee and slowly stroking up her thigh. The soothing touch began to calm Abby down and flip her brain into pragmatic mode. "Do you think I should come home for Thanksgiving? Instead of waiting till Christmas?"
Sarah put herself in Abby's shoes. She could only imagine how far away and helpless she felt knowing her grandmother was facing surgery, even a fairly routine surgery. "It would probably be fine if you waited until Christmas. I don't want you to miss any classes or get behind."
"If I left on Wednesday morning and came home Sunday night I wouldn't miss anything at all," Abby argued.
Now it was Sarah's tur
n to sigh as she wondered exactly how jacked-up airline tickets would be for the holiday. She hadn't even looked for tickets for the winter break holiday yet. Well, since Matt is paying for most of Abby's schooling, I have extra money in her college account. I guess I could pull a little extra out to cover the airfare. "Okay, let me check flights and I will call you back."
"Is Adam coming next week?" Abby asked.
"He's on his way here right now."
Abby didn't want to leave Mia alone for Thanksgiving, but her heart felt sick over her grandmother's illness. Maybe if she could get Adam
alone, she could tell him that she was seeing a girl. Because it would feel good to tell someone, she thought. She wasn't ready to tell her mother and James yet.
And she didn't know if she'd ever be ready to tell her father and his girlfriend Bobbi, whom Abby disliked the more time she spent around her. She was slated to spend Christmas with her mother, but then be back in time for New Years at her father's house. She was planning to spend two weeks there before spring classes started in January. She dreaded the thought of explaining where she was going every time she wanted to see Mia. And what if she wanted to spend the night with her?
Maybe Adam could give me some advice about what to tell my mom. Maybe I could even bring Mia to Maryland for Christmas? All the ideas suddenly generated by the new information were beginning to swim laps in her head. She said goodbye to her mother, who had promised to get back in touch after she researched flights, and explained the situation to Mia. She expected her to be a little pouty that Abby might be leaving for a few days, but she seemed concerned for Abby’s grandmother above all.
Abby's heart swelled. It was comforting to be a burgeoning adult and be in a relationship with someone was also capable of acting like an adult. Bree would have ignored Abby’s pangs of guilt for not being home and whined to have her stay there with her, and Tyler would have accused her of going home to cheat on him. They would have both made it about them, she reflected. Mia wants what’s best for me. And that’s why…that’s only one of the reasons I think I may be falling in love with her.
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