His laugh was gentle, his breath stirring the hair along her hairline, and she gave in to the well-earned sleep that claimed her.
Chapter Fourteen
With her new status as peace-broker, and wearing the beaten silver necklace Taso had given her on their bonding day, Veronica undertook the role of diplomat. It wasn’t something she took to naturally, but she carried Taso’s fierce desire to see the Clans united, at least in some manner. And she carried his words. At first she could only read his proposals, speak his words. But the longer she traveled, the more she read from his papers, the more at ease she became.
When she approached the Moonbay Clan for the first time, after many months of failed attempts at meetings, and broken promises, she spoke from the heart. From her heart.
The Byakko Clan—the tigers—emissary had come with her, both of them with a battalion of guards from both Clans, to speak to the Moonbay wolves. They had gotten as far as the outer gate, met by the Moonbay emissary, with the entire Clan behind him. The emissary was short, a round man with bristly gray hair and a full beard. He had beady black eyes, and she imagined him as a wolf, a thickset animal with six short legs.
He’d looked her up and down, eyes finally resting on her necklace. Then he looked into her eyes and breathed out a derisive laugh.
“They send a woman, and expect me to take what she has brought with her seriously? What, does Mikel Taso need to hide behind a woman? Is he too fearful to speak with us? He values his own skin more than I value mine, I think.”
Her first thought had been to tell the pompous ass to shut up. But she couldn’t do that. She drew herself up, shoulders back, spine straight.
“Mikel Taso sent me on his behalf, as an honor to me. I am his mate, and I am here to discuss a treaty of peace. It’s time we stopped killing each other.” She took a step toward the man. She was easily half a head taller than he was, and might have been able to take him in the ring with those short arms. “Mikel Taso values peace above all else, but make no mistake, this offer of peace is for your benefit, even more than ours. At this rate, the Moonbay Clan will be wiped out come spring.”
He’d nearly choked in response, his face flushed in rage, but reluctantly, he stepped aside, and with her head held high, she led the group through the Moonbay Clan gates. As she heard the doors close behind her, she was thankful no one could hear the beating of her heart, because it was thudding away hard enough that she was sure the front of her dress moved with each beat.
* * *
Over the next few months, she’d come to accept her place in this alien world. The men and women in the barracks treated her as their equal, but respected who she was with, who she was now bonded to. She fought beside them, wielding her spear against enemy shifters, listening to their grunts and howls as she screamed her battle cry alongside of them. She fought with them, and for them, as one of them.
She fought alongside Taso as well. But it was less and less that he was fighting alongside of her, as much as he was watching over her. It had been a subtle change, but a noticeable one. They’d always had each other’s backs, but now it seemed he was more focused on her safety than he was on the battle at hand. She’d see him nearby, catch sight of him, not fighting, but watching her. Then charging in to deflect whoever or whatever was coming at her. She felt like she was playing clean up, dispatching his kills with her spear, but never making the kill herself. That he was protecting her. That he was afraid for her life.
Moonbay wolves were at the gate, literally, and she’d gone with Taso to the wall. Looking down, she saw them, sleek black wolves engaged with thick burly bears. It was horrific to watch, even from this height. Watching her fellow Clan mates being torn and bitten, seeing the blood, the fur being ripped from their bodies...
“It’s all so senseless.”
“It is.” Taso’s voice was low, almost sad. “It is, and I don’t know how to make it stop. I do not know how to make them stop.”
She knew he meant the Moonbay Clan. The wolves stubbornly refused to agree to any peace treaty. No matter who approached them, the wolves refused to cooperate. They’d even gone so far as to forbid her entry into their province, after the one and only disastrous meeting when she had tried to talk sense with the leader, but it had amounted to nothing. She, and the other emissaries, had left after only half an hour, during which they’d only had insults hurled at them from the Clan leader.
“We should go...” She turned away, but he put his hand on her arm.
“No. I will go. You...you should not.”
She frowned, looking down at his hand on her arm. His fingers curled around her wrist, his grip like steel. “Taso? What are you doing?”
“You cannot fight any longer. You...” His eyes met hers, and she stopped pulling against him.
“What is it? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing is wrong, my love…everything is exactly as it should be.”
“Taso, I don’t understand.”
“You are able to bear me children now. Whatever the thing you took that made your body stop accepting me…it’s gone.”
“Oh...” She breathed out a sigh that was something like relief. “The pill has finally worn off. Yeah, I know. That happens. It’s taken longer than I thought it would.” She relaxed, pulled against his hand, but he didn’t let go.
“So you know what that means?” He stepped closer, his body almost touching hers, her hands now pressed against his chest. She could feel his breath against her cheek. “It means you can conceive. And that means I cannot let you fight.” He tipped his head. “Down there.”
“But...I’m not pregnant.” He was silent a heartbeat too long. “I’m not pregnant, am I?”
But she could see in his eyes that she wasn’t, even before he shook his head. “No. Not yet. But the possibility is there.” He finally let go of her wrist, but he didn’t step back.
“And I do not want to lose you, not now. Not when it is so close.”
A sudden rush of anger flooded through her. “Listen, Taso, I made it perfectly clear to you, after that first battle, that this is what I wanted to do. Not to be sequestered in your rooms, bearing you children. I told you then...and you agreed. I want to fight. Do you remember what you said?”
“You said you found your voice. That you found...”
“Not what I said, what you said. You said you would always listen to me. Always.”
He held her gaze, but she knew he understood her. He understood everything she was saying.
“I am listening. And I’m asking you to listen to me now, Max. You are forbidden to fight. I’m sorry..”
With that, he turned and stalked out of the room. From the hall, she heard a sound that startled her. It was the sound of a key turning in the lock. He’d locked her in his rooms. She sank down in bed in disbelief.
Son of a bitch.
She had more to say, much more, that day when he’d returned from battle. And the next day when there had been wolves. For days, he locked her in. And for days, she’d pleaded for him to let her fight once more.
But he only turned away, and each time he locked her in, ensuring her safety. When he returned, she refused to speak to him. But she couldn’t hold the anger when he reached for her in the night. Withholding the only thing that brought them together seemed cruel, but she was furious.
With anger still raging through her, she watched him walk away yet again. Then she turned back, looking down at the battle below. She waited, and then Taso appeared, charging out of the gate, the spines on his back catching the weak sunshine. He engaged the first wolf that came across his path. He tore into it, slashing with his big feet, the claws and spines on his paws ripping the wolf open from stem to stern. She thought she heard the crunch as Taso bit down on the wolf’s skull, but she knew it was only in her imagination.
The scrimmage was small, as far as these things go, fewer wolves fighting fewer bears. Taso fought like she’d seen him fight when she first arrived, during the first times
she’d fought with him. He was aggressive, fearless, like the man she’d fought with at the start. The man who valued her for her strength and power, and her own fearlessness. The man who had been the first—the only person to love her for herself.
The man she loved more than life itself.
It hit her like a physical blow. She really did love him.
Something came undone inside her, the anger toward Taso dissolving in a rush pent up emotions. The man she loved was down there, fighting for his people. For her, for that matter. And she was up her, watching. Her place was beside him, no matter what he said.
She turned away, ran to the door and turned the handle. It refused to move. He’d locked her in, again. With her ear to the door, she listened. There were voices in the hall. Slamming her hand against the door, she called out, yelled at the top of her lungs.
Someone stopped, there were voices, and then the sound of a key turning. Either Taso hadn’t told the rest that he locked his mate away during each battle, or someone was outside who didn’t know. It didn’t matter. The door swung open, and she ran past the startled face of the main in armor.
A few men were in the courtyard, waiting to be called, or already back from fighting. She didn’t care. The gate was open just enough, and she slipped through the opening, running toward Taso, toward him and the wolf he was fighting.
It wasn’t until she was there, with them in front of her, the snarls and growls filling her head with fight song, that she realized she had no weapon. But it didn’t matter. She could see Taso, and he needed her. She ran, feet pounding the ground, a shrill battle cry tearing from her throat.
Taso was on the ground on his back, the wolf with two legs, on his chest, two sunk into his thick torso, two on the ground, claws dug into the soft earth. It looked almost comical, if she was in the mood to laugh, but she certainly wasn’t. Taso outweighed the wolf by at least a hundred pounds, but the wolf was crazed, foaming at the moth, spit and blood flying. Taso must have wounded it at some point.
As she ran, Taso swung one huge paw through the air, raking it across the wolf’s back. It shrieked, and then with horror, she saw the wolf drop its head, teeth sinking into the thick skin of Taso’s neck. She was close enough to hear the sickening sound of teeth tearing flesh, something like bones crunching.
She ran forward, threw a kick into the wolf’s ribs. The force broke its hold on Taso, and as it lifted its head, Taso rolled, sending the wolf flailing onto its back, six legs flailing into the air. It scrabbled for a moment, then gained all its feet, snarling. Taso shook himself, eyes darting between the wolf and her. She saw anger and rage...and the fear she’d seen in him before.
The wolf charged her, hitting her in the stomach. It knocked her flat on her back, but before the wolf could do more than growl in her face, Taso backhanded the wolf, thick spines shredding armor and fur and skin, knocking it away, like swatting a fly. The wolf landed in a crumpled heap, and didn’t get up.
Veronica pushed up, getting to her feet. Taso turned on her, teeth bared and for a moment she thought he was going to knock her back down, but he only growled at her and turned away.
She remained on the field of battle, fighting behind him, alongside of him, the number of wolves dwindling until they were facing each other, both breathing hard. With a rough shake of his head, he shuffled toward the gate. The men above tugged the chains, and it opened just enough to let them in. Before she slipped through, she looked back. Coming from the trees, she saw men with carts; they were coming to retrieve their fallen, to take them back to bury as fallen heroes. It made her sad beyond anything to think of the families waiting, and then having to wait again for the men with the carts.
By the time she reached the courtyard, Taso had already shifted, and he was waiting for her. There was no way to avoid him, but she was ready for him, and for the fight she knew was coming.
“Listen, I need you to...”
“Not here.” He grabbed her hand, pulling her out of the courtyard, growling at her under his breath. “Not here.”
He dragged her almost all the way to his rooms before she managed to pull her hand out of his grip. It garnered her a glance over his shoulder, but he kept going. She ran after him, until he flung the door to his rooms open, and she staggered inside.
“Okay. Now will you listen?”
He had her in his arms before she could tell him no, not this. She wanted to tell him, but her body wanted him, so badly she felt it in every nerve, every cell. When he kissed her, she was ready, her lips crushing against his. The coppery taste of blood filled her mouth, but she wasn’t sure if it was his or hers. She didn’t care.
He pushed her against the wall, her head hitting the stones. The impact broke the kiss, and she stared at Taso, breathing hard. His breath tore from his throat, and she could see wild passion in eyes. For a moment, they glared at each other.
Then she reached for his armor, pulling his torn shirt over his head. He grabbed at her, pulling and tearing her clothes, until she was naked. Then he had her against the wall again, lifting her, fingers digging into the back of her thighs, pushing himself into her. Stones scraped against her back, but she met him fully, wrapping her legs around his waist, her arms around his neck.
It was hard and brutal and over in a matter of minutes. When they were finished, she let her legs relax, and he held her until her feet had touched the ground. For a moment, she’d been loose-limbed, but then she’d gained her strength. He’d looked down at her for a moment, his expression unreadable. She’d slipped out of his arms then, and ran.
* * *
“Now, you have to listen.”
“Yes, I suppose I must.”
She’d left him in the tunnel, running on instinct to his rooms, locking herself in the bath. There she’d run the water, grabbing one of the colored vials, pouring it in. She’d sunk into the blue-green scented water, letting her anger and dirt and blood wash away.
She’d refused to let him hold her when she’d come out, to find him already in his bed. She was full of pent up energy, maybe anger. Certainly frustration. Now he looked up at her from the bed, eyes half closed, hands behind his head, as if he was indulging her in some whim. “This is serious. This is how I feel. Before...this...” She waved her hand over the tumble of linen that sounded their bodies. “Before you ambushed me.” The aftermath of that ambush was still rocking through her body.
Taso nodded, then sat up, the indolent expression fading. “I know this is serious. It is for me too. But seeing you...after watching you...” He shrugged. “I could not help myself. And neither could you.”
“Well...” It was hard not to admit he was right. “I don’t think we’ll ever have anything less than amazing chemistry between the sheets.”
It was clear that went over his head, but she went on. “You can’t use sex to change the subject. To try to keep me from talking.”
A smile played around his mouth, but it never quite reached his eyes. “What you had to say isn’t something I want to hear. I do not enjoy fighting with you like that. It hurts my heart. I think it hurts yours as well.”
“It does. But being shut out hurts just as much.” She realized she was crouching on the bed, as if she was going to attack him. She let herself relax back, uncoiled her legs, made the conscious effort to unclench her fists. Part of her wanted to slap him, push him down, shake him until he listened to her, but she was pretty sure that would only lead to more sex. For a minute, the image rose up, the two of them, arms and legs locked in sweaty combat, resulting in another body wracking orgasm. And putting off what she wanted to say.
“Then speak plainly.”
She sat back, the dim space between them filled with tension that wasn’t entirely sexual.
“You can’t make me stay behind. You can’t tell me what to do.”
His brows had drawn together at her first words. She took a breath, started over again.
“You said you were drawn to me because of my strength, my power. Th
at I could come here and fight for you, for your dreams. And I’ve done that.”
His brow smoothed out slowly. “You have done that. And very well.”
“But now you’re telling me I can’t, because according to you, I can conceive.”
“This is true.” He sat forward, pulling his legs up, resting his elbows on his knees. “On both points. You cannot, and you can.”
“Being able to have a baby doesn’t mean I can’t fight. Last week I fought and you didn’t say anything.”
“It is irrelevant what happened in the past. I am talking about now. This day. This moment.” His eyes had gone dark with passion, or anger.
This was only going to go in circles. She could see that. “Taso. If you make me stay here, leave me behind, I’m going to be miserable. Unhappy. I’ll feel useless and grow to hate you.” She winced at her words. They were harsh, but she wasn’t sure how else to reach him. Logic didn’t seem to be working. Maybe hitting him in his emotions would work.
He sat forward suddenly grabbing her arms. The momentum carried her back, Taso coming with her, until she was on her back, his face only inches from hers.
“I love you like no other. You are my breath, and my heartbeat and the blood in my veins. To tell you that you cannot fight was not a decision I made lightly. To see you out there stirs things inside me that I never thought I would feel again.”
His fingers dug painfully into her skin, but all she could do was look up at him, hardly daring to breath.
“It is not that you are weaker than you were, or unable to fight while carrying my child. But to lose both of you would be more than I could take. I do not want to see your body on a stretcher, being carried into the courtyard with the rest of the dead. And know what I’d lost...the two of you.”
Two of you? It was like her mind had stopped working after that, and it took her a minute to let the rest of his words catch up. Then it hit her, a body punch, just like the realization that she loved him. It knocked the air right out of her. It took her a minute before she found her voice.
Dark Side Of The Moon (BBW Paranormal Were-Bear Shifter Sci-Fi Romance) Page 15
