“I didn’t ask for it, now did I?” Rage, this chapter’s president sneered at me. “I honestly couldn’t tell you what the fuck they were thinkin’ with a shit offer like that either and frankly, we don’t need their shit comin’ up here. I’ll get with the president over there. If he don’t want to get with it, I’ll get with National. We’ll work something out, goin’ to war with the likes of your two clubs would be suicide…” he glanced at the members of the SHMC in attendance and added, “No pun intended.”
Shaking my head. “Not an option. This shit gets settled before we even walk out of here.” Pulling the gun that always sits under my cut, I place it on the table in front of me. “Look. I get we don’t have the beef with your chapter specifically, but I’ll be goddamned if I walk the fuck out of here without some sort of understandin’. You get me?” Rage looked from the gun back to my face. He can see that shit in my eyes; I’m not joking.
“I get you, Vape. Let me make a call.” His voice was grim with an undercurrent of angry. Nodding my head, he stood from the table, nodding towards his guys before walking away.
“Goddamnit Vape! You’re still a trigger-happy son of a bitch.” Archer muttered darkly, his hand coming down on my shoulder.
“No, I’m a tired son of a bitch. I want to take my ass back home. Small town or not, you boys are too damn calm for my liking.” Rush chuckled at my statement. It was the damn truth. At least back home I could fuck with Mason, the car club asshole that moved into town.
“Let’s just see how this shit plays out.” Lukas looks around, trying to take in the Devils. I can see the evil shit glisten in his eyes. Crazy fucker is just as bad as I am.
“Brother, if you’re that fuckin’ tired,” Archer muttered for my ears only, “You might want to try some diplomacy rather than reachin’ for your gun first thing all the damn time.”
I didn’t have a chance to respond because Rage came walking out of the back of his line of guys and bikes with a grin on his face. His huge arms crossed over his chest.
“I think it’s safe to say that the motherfuckers down south won’t be gettin’ in your way, anymore.” That does little to ease the worry in me. His words are empty, mean nothing, without anything to back them up.
“Care to elaborate?” Noting the tone in my voice, he sits back down at his side of the picnic table, crossing his legs at the ankle underneath.
“I talked to National who let them know that if shit crosses your paths, their portion of the green is cut the fuck off. I have other chapters that can take on the extra to make it happen who would gladly steer clear of any major beef with you and yours.” Hell, if I had known it would be that easy I would have cut off their goddamn stash myself my own way. Would have saved us the trip out here.
“That’s all I needed to hear.” Lukas shoved out of the bench on our side of the table. I give his face a good once over, he seemed happy enough with how this went down. At least there wasn’t any blood. That kind of pissed me off slightly, considering I haven’t had a good brawl in a while.
Shaking hands with Rage, we follow the other niceties before hitting the road back to the Sacred Heart’s clubhouse. The cool air hits my heated skin and I thought to myself, I just need to climb on my bike and ride into the fucking wind, sort my shit out. I needed that freedom now more than ever, but it wasn’t going to be had for a while, yet.
When we were all pulled up back out front of the SHMC clubhouse, I looked over in the direction of the Sacred Hearts boys.
“Appreciate everything you did.” My eyes were trained on Archer before moving to Rush then Nox.
“You would have done the same,” Rush looked at me. Shit, he shouldn’t be so goddamn sure of himself. I didn’t owe these motherfuckers anything, they owed me, but the debt… the debt was paid.
“Yeah. We’re even now, but you ever need anything, don’t be afraid to reach out.” Lukas apparently decided that now was a good time to chime in. I didn’t actually know how I felt about that comment. I needed to get my shit together and as far away from this clubhouse as possible. As far away from Moira as possible. She still had my brain in a blender.
Climbing off my bike, something settles within me. The more I thought about it, the more I realized Moira was more like my mom than I’d care to admit, for obvious reasons. I mean, don’t get me that fucked up, I never looked at my mom the way I did Moira. The similarities in their character is what kept eating at me.
If she could find it in her to listen, maybe I could tell her a little about what it felt like to be on the receiving end. It killed pieces of me to see my mom have to be the one to choose this life. In my mind, I know she did everything she did for me. That she stayed with my dad so that she could protect me, try to be the angel on my shoulder to guide me into something better, but that didn’t make me feel any better. In fact, that just made the pain worse.
Pulling my helmet off, I hooked it on the handlebar of my beast. This ride has been one hell of an eye opener for me. I’m ready to get the fuck back home which is unusual for me. My body vibrates with way too many feelings for my liking. I don’t like feeling anything. This whole trip has stirred up more of the past than I wanted it to. Maybe that was a good thing, though.
Maybe, just fucking maybe I could turn this shit into something better. Getting Moira to open up to the man she so obviously loves might just be the best thing about this trip. I left my helmet swinging off the handlebar and clearing my throat, I went back inside the SHMC’s clubhouse.
Part Four
Moira…
I didn’t want to go home. Several of the Sacred Hearts had gone with the Black Diamonds, Lucky included, and I worried. Not just for him, but surprisingly, for Vape as well. Vape was the first one of the two through the door and as relieved as I was to see he was alright, the tightness in my chest eased, but only marginally.
I sat curled on one of the chairs behind a table near the back wall, a drink sitting nearly empty and looking as lost as I felt beside me. I’d smoked a cigarette. I didn’t smoke anymore, had quit two years ago, but I’d needed one tonight. Ironic the only brand available to bum had been a Lucky Strike.
I hugged my knees and as much as I wanted to drag my eyes from Vape’s to see if Lucky were among the returning men, to know that he was alright, I couldn’t. He stalked towards me with purpose, and stopped, staring down his nose at me. It made me feel smaller than I already did, and I cringed inwardly.
“Mind if I hit that one more time before I go?” he asked, and I caught my bottom lip between my teeth, nodding admittedly a little reluctantly. I steeled myself against the emotions I knew were to come and stood to follow Vape back to the guest rooms. I caught a glimpse of Lucky outside through the open clubhouse door and relief flooded my system. He was okay, and despite the sheer amount of crazy I was feeling where he was concerned, just knowing he was alright made it alright, you know?
You couldn’t fix things with someone you loved if that someone was dead.
“C’mon, Little Red… I ain’t got all night,” Vape grated and I blinked. I hadn’t realized I’d stopped to stare. Lucky chose that moment to look in my direction. The easy smile slipped off his face and his blue eyes grew solemn. He gave me an encouraging smile and gave a nod in my direction and I had such mixed emotions over it.
I took Vape’s hand and followed him into the dark of the hallway, the shards of my breaking heart caught in a tornado inside my chest, swirling in cutting misery.
• • •
“You’re so fuckin’ sexy,” Vape uttered, pulling his shirt over his head. I slipped out of my hooded sweatshirt and pulled my tee over mine. He kicked off his boots, gaze devouring me hungrily, as I slipped my shorts off my legs.
“Leave the socks, those are hot,” he said. I had added long, striped thigh high socks when the guys were out, as I’d gotten cold. I nodded, standing nude and watching while he stripped the rest of the way out of his clothes, waiting for the next order. Expecting it would be to get on my
knees.
I was surprised when he pulled off his pants, cock bobbing seductively against the cobbles of his lower abs and instead of ordering me onto my knees, he grabbed my hand and led me to the bed. He laid down and drew me by my fingertips to straddle his hips.
“You wet enough?” he asked, and I shook my head. We hadn’t done enough to get me ready to take all of that.
“Come up here,” he demanded, and I walked up his body on my knees. I trembled finely in anticipation. Desire unfurling like a flower in my belly. Vape hummed appreciatively and ordered, “Hands against the wall, sweetheart. I want you to ride my face, then I want you to ride my dick. You got it?”
“Yes,” I muttered, voice breathy, as I planted my palms firmly against the wall, easing my body lower.
“That’s it, darlin’,” he whispered, and something about him; something about this, was different than before.
His tongue delved between my folds and I felt the tight muscles along my spine loosen. My breath escaped my body in a shuddering sigh and I let my hands take more of my weight instead of my knees. I tried to relax, tried to let myself get into it with him, and it wasn’t terribly hard. The man was well practiced at sex and knew all the right things.
Where our first round had been frenzied, filled with feral noises, grated commands, cries, and the report of flesh against flesh? The silence of this one was filled with soft breathing and slight breathy moans. His mouth was gentler, but no less demanding, as he coaxed my body into a state of arousal.
A low, sensual moan escaped my throat, ending on a gasp of surprise that he could draw such a sound from me, let alone that it was the same man who’d so roughly fucked me earlier in the evening.
“Yeah, come down here, sweetheart. Ride my cock,” he ordered, his breath warm on my inner thigh. I scooted down his body and he held his cock out for me to penetrate myself on. I slid down him slowly, still not completely ready and he let me take my time to work him in.
His eyes remained riveted to mine and the intensity of his gaze made me uncomfortable. I closed my eyes and tipped my head back, thrusting my tits out in a bit to give myself a little breather from the intensity of that stare. His hands found my hips and gave them a little admonishing squeeze.
“Eyes on mine,” he ordered and I obliged him, letting my head fall forward and opening my eyes, rolling my hips in such a way that his eyes temporarily slipped shut. I moved slowly, deliberately, raising the heat index between us slowly, mostly because I was so incredibly uncertain as to what brought the change in him on.
“You’re so fucking sexy; that bother’s gotta know he’s missin’ out.”
I faltered in my attentions, but regained my composure quickly, rising and falling on his length. This was so different, so changed; so… intimate. It finally struck me, this was intimate. The slow moving of bodies, the fixed gaze, devouring every detail of my face. I slowed even further and let my fingertips graze the tattoo of the angel, inked in grayscale beneath his skin.
His hands smoothed up and down my thighs, to the tops of my socks and back to my hips. I raised my eyebrows at the guarded expression on his face, and asked the question hanging between us, “Who’s it for?” He swallowed hard and rolled his lips together before he answered, but he did answer.
“My mom.” My body slowed to a stop until I straddled him, his cock buried as deep as it could go inside me.
He sighed, and gave me a crooked smile, “Not to be a total fuckin’ bitch or anything, but you remind me of her.” I didn’t speak, shocked out of any words that would make sense, or that wouldn’t seem unkind given the obvious vulnerability he’d just displayed. Silence hung between us, and he swallowed hard again, demanding, voice rough with emotion, “Say somethin’.”
“I mean, I don’t know what to say…” I felt helpless. I wanted to make it better, smooth the tension and the hurt in his eyes away. For a man to go from as confident and dominant as he had to almost uncertain as he was now dragged out a fierce, almost protective instinct in me.
“Do I look like her?” I asked timidly and he laughed.
“Fuck no, I don’t think I’d be doing this if you did.” He thrust up into me, bucking his hips on the word ‘this’ to make his point all the clearer.
I cocked my head to the side and dragged my hair over one shoulder, before catching my balance with both hands on his chest. He laughed a little and I did too, before shyly I asked, “Tell me…” I half expected him to not, to just deflect things with more sex, but he surprised me.
“My mom was an angel. Loyal to a fault, sacrificed a shitload to be there for me,” he said. He was silent for a minute and said shortly, “Stuck around with my asshole father because she loved him, and she loved me, and she knew if she went that she’d lose me forever.”
I sat back a little more and felt him slowly start to soften inside me. The memories cut deep and a man couldn’t stay hard forever without stimulation to keep him going. The talk seemed to be far more important than the sex at this point.
“He hurt her?” I guessed. It was an all too familiar story in this life.
“He killed her,” he said, “didn’t matter how hard she tried to keep me straight, I turned out just like him.”
“Why do you say that?” I asked softly.
“You honestly enjoy chokin’ on my dick?” he asked arching an eyebrow.
I laughed lightly, “No, but you did, and it wasn’t all bad.”
“Yeah, well…”
“No, not ‘yeah well,’” I said laying down, crossing my arms over his chest and resting my chin on them so I could look into his eyes and give my back a rest. “You have your father in you, sure, but I think you hold a lot more of your mother in you than you give yourself credit for.”
He searched my face for a long minute and said, “I’m gonna give you some advice, darlin’.”
“Okay.” I was listening.
“Make him give you what you want. Dude’s too stupid to see it, but you’re both fuckin’ crazy about each other. Make him treat you the way you deserve and if he won’t? Come find me in California. You deserve to have happiness.”
I gasped slightly and he leaned up, putting his mouth against mine. I froze, surprised and let him kiss me, kissing him back, but the kiss tasted slightly sad because I knew I’d lost my heart to Lucky a long time ago and that poor Vape didn’t stand a chance.
He rolled us, bodies pressed tightly together, and took his time with me. Moving slowly, because he’d tasted it in the kiss too, that I wasn’t the one for him.
Vape surprised me, but it wouldn’t be the last surprise he had in store for me before the night was over…
• • •
I looked up, startled as Vape led me to the table in the corner where Lucky was sitting with Reaver and Trig. We’d gotten dressed and I’d followed him out here, expecting we would possibly go to the bar and get a drink, instead he’d marched us purposefully up to Lucky.
The conversation at the table died and Lucky looked over Vape warily before asking, “Somethin’ I can help you with, brother?”
“Nope, somethin’ I’m gonna help you, with.”
“Oh, yeah? What’s that?” Lucky asked, but his eyes were on me, searching me over; his expression mutely asking if I was alright.
“I’m gonna return your old lady to you,” he said dragging me forward and thrusting me at Lucky who caught me and drew me down into his lap. “You want to share her out, that’s your business, but you need to stop pretendin’ she’s anything less to you, or you’re going to lose her.”
Lucky looked over Vape and nodded sagely, the wheels spinning behind his bright blue eyes. He looked over to Reaver and Trig who exchanged a glance and shrugged.
“Well, thank you kindly,” Lucky said. Then he looked at me and asked, “You have a good time, baby girl?”
“I…” I didn’t know what to say. I looked at Vape’s broad, retreating back and he called over his shoulder back at Lucky.
“I m
ean it, brother... She knows she has a place in Cali if she chooses to leave your ass.”
Lucky looked at me and raised his eyebrows, a silent ‘how about it?’ I swallowed hard and shook my head and he smiled, cupping my cheek and dragging my mouth to his. I felt every muscle in my body turn liquid with relief.
He broke the kiss and said, “I don’t care who my ol’ lady fucks. It gets me off knowing she’s getting dick from another guy, but at the end of the day? My ol’ lady is just that –mine.”
I felt my eyes well with tears and spill over. Joy surged in my chest, hot and fierce and I kissed Lucky, salty sweet. It was all I’d ever wanted to hear, and it explained so much. I turned to look back at Vape who was next to the bar with his president. He saluted me with a shot and gave a nod, before knocking it back and turning back towards the bar.
I thought to myself: Yes, there’s a lot more of your mother in you than monster… that is for sure.
About the Authors
A.J. Downey is the internationally bestselling author of The Sacred Hearts Motorcycle Club romance series. She is a born and raised Seattle, WA Native. Finds inspiration from her surroundings, through the people she meets, and likely as a byproduct of way too much caffeine.
She has lived many places and done many things though mostly through her own imagination… An avid reader all of her life it’s now her turn to try and give back a little, entertaining as she has been entertained. She lives in a small house in a small neighborhood with a larger than life fiancé and two cats.
For the full A.J. Downey stalker status experience, you can find her at www.ajdowney.com
Erin Trejo was crazy enough to want to pair up with A.J. and then turned out to be crazy enough to keep up. This is a placeholder author bio until she gets a real one, because, let’s face it. She couldn’t be awesome and totally on the ball. There’s only so much room for perfection in any one person.
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