Nina looked so worried that Nic acted without hesitation. He gathered her into his arms, held her tight and nuzzled the top of her head. Her hair was clean, shiny, and smelled of lemon verbena. He instantly decided it was his new favorite scent. "Oh, anima mia, we can sort that. It will be my pleasure and an honor to do so." He took her arm once more and urged her along the path. They might as well enjoy the sunshine. "Is that why you won't sub?" It sounded an inane reason to Nic, but he'd long decided that one person's reasoning might be totally incomprehensible to someone else. "Because you're a virgin and hate taking orders?"
"Don't be daft. You know as well as I do that the sub has the last word. Or that you don’t have to have sex to be a Domme or a sub. Of course I'd like to jump the fence and let the horse see the field, but it's not my be all and end all. No, that's not worth thinking of."
"What isn't?" Damned if what hadn't become his most used word that day, as well as Nina's. "Losing your virginity?"
"No, you nit." Nina slugged his arm in a friendly way. "Mind you, I guess that’s it as well. I've never met anyone I could be bothered to go all the way with. At uni I was so damned focused, I didn't have time to go through the whole plimsol line mating rituals."
He must have looked as bewildered as he felt, because Nina elaborated. "You know the ‘you can touch me above my waist as long as I've got my bra on, but not below’ rubbish. The plimsol line, like on a boat. I mean BDSM. I studied it, practiced it, wrote about it, and thought, hey, that's great if it's what you want, but I don't. I just got bored with it all. For a start, I don't do pain. It's not a pleasure, and no one but no one practices corporal punishment on me and keeps their body parts where they're supposed to be. And before you ask, no, I wasn't abused, I've never been attacked, and yes, I did try it. With a very good Dom. But we both agreed it wasn't for me."
"Athol?" Why Nic was so certain he had no idea, but it fitted.
"Athol," Nina agreed. "Poor soul, he never, ever said I was damaging his Dom-cred, but he did say something about difficult subs who weren't and Doms and Dommes who didn't. I fell into both categories."
It figured. Although Nina sounded insouciant, the dark cloud in her eyes and the worry lines over her forehead told a different story. Nic's heart went out to her. He tried a new tactic.
"How about we try something different?" Nic spied a nearby seat and pushed Nina toward it. The two women with the prams had disappeared, and the only other person in the vicinity was a jogger taking his time to do a circuit of the area, whilst enjoying the sunshine. "Park your butt and hear me out." Dominic sat down, and let go of her arm. He wasn't giving Nina any chance to say he coerced her and forced her to listen.
She lifted one shoulder and twisted her mouth up at one side, then sat down, putting the bag of crusts onto the ground next to them. "Sheesh, I so love the sun. Why do I live in Scotland? Land of summer is one day in May and the bloody midge."
"Men in kilts and whisky?" Nic said. "It works for me. No, I'm not gay, or bi, but I can appreciate a good hot male bod when I see one. With a few politicians apart, a kilt always makes a guy look good."
"Yeah…" Nina let out her breath with gusto, and tucked her feet under the slats of the wooden seat. The front of her skirt with its buttons unfastened split fell to either side of her legs and exposed long, pale, slightly sun-kissed skin.
Nic nigh on salivated. His fingers itched to walk up their length and slide over her pussy lips and delve deep inside the velvet darkness of her channel.
"Don't it just. Kilts are sooo sexy." Nina rolled her eyes and gave an exaggerated sigh. "Do you have one?"
"Of course. And I wear it if the occasion warrants it. Don't change the subject." As he waited for Nina to continue speaking, Nic took the opportunity to get his unruly body back under control.
"What's your idea?" Nina asked him. She put one fingernail into her mouth, evidently saw the way he looked at her, and obviously changed her mind. She sat on her hand instead.
Luckily she seemed oblivious to his carnal thoughts, and was interested enough to ask him what he had in mind. That had to be a good sign, surely? As long as she didn't emasculate him when he told her. Nic stretched his legs out in front of him, and enjoyed the warmth of the sun through the old faded denim that covered them. "Let's see what we can do. So, something simple. If I said only I chose your thongs, what would you say?"
"I'd ask you why." Almost absently it seemed, she rubbed her thumb of the hand she wasn't sitting on over his palm. "And why my thongs and not my other underwear?"
There's that bloody word again. I swear it'll go on her gravestone. “She always asked why”.
"Because I asked you to." How he didn't let his impatience overflow into his speech Nic had no idea. "As a Dom. It's one thing we could do together. Our version of BDSM. After all it's different things to different people. I have no truck with the one way for everyone scenario. We don't all like pasta or liver. We don't all want to go to the cinema or play golf. Each to their own. Everyone has to find the path that suits them. Maybe this could be part of ours. I guarantee it won't bore you. You hand that part of your life over to me, with the power of a sub's veto. A little thing in the grand scheme of things, but a big thing in the trust scenario." Nic folded his hand inward and held her thumb close. She didn't pull back. "Only I say what underwear, if any, you put on each day. I tell you, and I accept you'll do as I say. Could you do that?"
She shrugged. "Not just thongs then. Sounds a bit domineering, but I'd give it a try maybe."
"I'm a Dom, and you'd be submitting to my command. Let's do it this way. This might sound negative, but it isn't, trust me. When you saw the lifestyle from both sides, what did you hate? What's a hard limit?"
Nina nibbled her lip. "Pain. Both giving and receiving. For any reason. Exhibitionism, voyeurism, stuff like that."
"Forced orgasms, withheld orgasms, wax, knives, bondage?"
Nina laughed. It sounded unnatural to Nic, and her half smile didn't reach her eyes.
"I never did any sex stuff per se, so orgasms and things I didn't go near. I can Shibari tie okay, but don't see the point, and hated it on me. It really did freak me to be unable to move, so even bondage was yuck." Nina grimaced and ran her hand through her hair in a self-conscious manner. "Wax I managed, but I was no expert, and knives I've never touched, so I don't know, but it all ties in, gah stupid expression, with pain. And if it hurts it's a no. I don’t like being blindfolded, but I'm happy to shut my eyes and keep them shut. Gah, I'm crap. I know all the technical aspects and got high praise for my thesis, but there was nothing to make me want to go further. When I Domme-ed, I didn't put my heart and soul into it, and believe me it showed. No sub deserves that. On the other hand, if I sub, once you take all my hard limits out, there's bugger all left. Not only that, I have a need to question everything. I always have. I'm a stubborn so and so, and if someone tells me to do something, I'm likely to do the opposite just to show I can."
Oh, how well he knew that.
"If I gave you a book to read, with lots of bondage, wax play, flogging and whatever in it, would you read it?" Nic held his breath whist she formulated her answer. Was it that difficult to say yes or no?
"It depends. Does it have a good storyline, or is it all nonfiction and dry as dust?"
"Either."
"Probably, maybe. I wouldn't if it was badly written."
That figured. He'd be the same. "Would it turn you on?"
"You do go for the jugular, don't you?" Nina said.
Nic was reassured by her light tone. It didn't seem as if his direct questioning fazed her. "While you're making your mind up whether to answer me or not, think about this as well. Did it disgust you watching people scening?"
"Of course not." She sounded astonished he'd even ask. "That's different."
"Did it turn you on?"
"Not in a thong wetting clamp my legs together make me come way, no. I was happy for them, but it didn't make me want to emulate them. Readin
g? Maybe, probably. But, and that's a big but, there's an enormous difference reading about stuff, and enjoying what you read, to doing it. My hands and my toys are enough until a man I want to share me with appears. And I can not believe I'm saying this to you. I hardly know you."
Nic disagreed with her. "You know me better than you want to admit. I bet you Googled me when I left you the other day." Nina blushed, and he chuckled. "Don't worry. I did the same for you. Impressive qualifications, anima mia. I feel I should call you Dr. Mack. But I'm not going to. Anima mia suits you so much better."
Nina twisted her mouth into a moue. "I'd not say I was your soul, not when I'm not even sure if I'm mine. Oh sugar, how weird does that sound? Well you know what I mean. I can't believe this conversation. I'm going to wake up in a minute and find I've fallen asleep after eating too much cheese."
"It's happening." Nic pinched the soft skin between her thumb and forefinger, and Nina squealed.
"Ouch, okay, I believe you. We're in the park talking about sex and soul mates. No need to inflict pain, remember what I said about pain."
"That little sting is so not pain, and you know it. I can hardly say anima mia to be, now can I? Not intimate. So I'll stick with anima mia. It's true even if I can't say why." Nic paused to gather his thoughts. "Do you like feeling sexy? Feeling good about yourself and what you wear?" He curled his hand around her throat and stroked the nape of her neck.
Nina shivered and leaned into his hand. It was so very hard not to follow through with a pinch or a nip, and then move his hand lower. Only his iron will stopped him. Nic wouldn't have been surprised to see his hand tremble as he moved it gently over her skin.
"I like the way you touch me." Nina sounded surprised.
"Then that's our start. Now, I know you say you're no sub and not a Domme. I'm glad about the Domme bit and not so sure you understand about the sub bit. Submission comes in many ways and forms. From letting me chose your thongs, or denying you undies. To telling you what we're going to do in the bedroom, or wherever I chose, and you deferring to me. Listening to me direct our own personal sex scene via the telephone and you describing how you do as I say. Demanding you come—or not. Is there pain there? Not unless you count wanting to come and having to hold back. Are you held down or unsighted against your will? No never. Will you have safe words? All the time. Will I take heed of them? Absolutely. Am I as horny as hell thinking about all this? You bet." He stopped speaking.
Nina's eyes narrowed in concentration. "Athol tried to tell me all this, but I had a hard time getting my head ‘round it. Donny, my brother, who's big and macho is an out and out sub, but so different from me, so I thought, oh no not me. Not at all. I guess I just pulled the shutters down. Once I'd seen Donny, bound, gagged, and getting a flogging I was eugh. That's my brother. Not for me. It was a total accident, mind, but hard to come to terms with. I didn't know he was in the club. I mean I've no problems about it being his thing, but it's so private and personal, I felt like a peeping tom. And there is no way on earth I could go on show. Even learning the ropes so to speak as a sub, it was all one on one private rooms and stuff. Me, Athol, and Linsey. I didn't want spectators mentally giving me marks out of ten, or offering advice."
He could understand that. He and his wife had never played in front of others, not even when at the club.
"If we were playing in private?' Nic asked. "At my house? I'd get Athol along if you felt you needed him there. Would you try? Within the boundaries of your limits?" He took hold of her chin and held her gaze.
Nina wriggled away, jumped up and walked to the edge of the lochan, and he let her go. This was important. Her skirt flowed like a rippling waterfall of blues and greens as it swung around her legs. She folded her arms around her middle and stood staring at the water. Nic held his breath. At least she seemed to be giving his ideas some consideration. Eventually she spun round, her hair following her movements like a bright red fan.
"Will you make love to me whatever my answer is?" Her eyes were wide, and she licked her lips in what Nic assumed was an unconscious, but erotic gesture.
Nic's stomach tightened. If it was a trick question he had no way of knowing. All he could do was answer truthfully, and from the heart. "Any time."
"Then yes."
"To?" Nic had trouble believing what he heard. He needed it spelled out in words of one syllable so there could be no mistakes or recriminations later on.
She grinned. "To think seriously about all of it. I have the usual safe words and with my hair? Well we all know what's my favorite colors are, even if one of them does clash."
Chapter Nine
The look of pleasure that spread across Nic's face went a long way to helping Nina kick out the butterflies in her stomach. After all he wasn't asking her to bare her breasts and walk around with them jiggling everywhere. Not that her boobs were big enough to jiggle, it would be a wee gentle sway more like. Bras weren't top of her list when she dressed every morning. Nina had long resigned herself to looking more like a stick insect than a well-rounded, womanly woman. It didn't bother her one bit. The expression, it took all sorts was true. As Karin often remarked that her boobs entered the room five minutes before the rest of her, and men never seemed to look above chest height in her direction, Nina thought maybe she herself had the best deal. She walked back to where Nic sat and stood between his legs.
"I'm humbled." Nic pulled her head down and put his lips against hers. His tongue demanded entrance, and Nina opened her mouth to give him what he asked. Immediately, his scent teased her, and she felt him trail his hand down her arm and then around her waist. His other hand held her head firmly as he deepened the kiss. Nina let herself be drawn into a world of sensation. Nothing else existed except the way her body responded to his. She slipped her fingers under the hem of his shirt and stroked the warm skin of his hard stomach. Maybe I can sub. Perhaps all this not for me stuff I've been spouting is a defense mechanism, in case I like it and the Dom doesn't? Sort of the lady protesteth too much?
Nic groaned into her mouth. The reverberations sent shock waves through her. Delicious, mind numbing, knee trembling, shockwaves. She stopped thinking about her motives.
"Oy, youse yins, get a room, yer pervs." The shout, accompanied by raucous laughter, brought her back to the present with an almighty bump.
Three teens on bikes shot passed them wobbling dangerously as they gesticulated and hollered, before doing wheelies and riding over the grass toward the park gates.
"They have a point I guess, so shall we?" Nic drew back, stood up and put his arm over her shoulder.
His voice was none too steady—a bit like her legs. In a perverse way it made her stronger, even though she swallowed and held on to his shoulder for stability.
"Your place or mine?" Nic asked.
"I'll think about it." Nina knew she was backpedaling, but this was full steam ahead with a vengeance. She had a lot of thinking to do. What if those boys hadn't come along when they did? Grief she'd be rolling in the grass and throwing caution, and her thong, to the wind. "What for exactly? Losing my sexual virginity, or losing my BDSM with you, virginity?"
"Losing your inhibitions. I have a fancy to seeing you naked."
Bloody hell, he does want my boobs out. "Naked as how?" Nina asked cautiously. "It's not very exciting. No boobs to speak of, no ass, and straight up and down. As my lovely brother used to say, five feet four and able to pass for a fence post. No, it doesn't bother me, as I've had plenty of years to get used to my androgynous figure. It's me. But I don't want you to be disappointed. A tattoo on one buttock and a birthmark on a boob don't make up for my lack of curves. But what you see is what you get."
Nic chuckled. "If I ever get to see. Both intrigue me. So, let me rephrase that question into an order. I want to see you naked. Today is Saturday. Tonight we're going to Feliciano's and acting like grown up civilized, non-kinky people. The only St. Andrew they know is our patron saint, and BDSM stands for Buy, Deliver, Save, and Multibu
y or something." He rolled his eyes. "As if. But hey, each to their own. It takes all sorts, thankfully, and what's good for us doesn't need to be good for others, eh?"
"That's for sure. And what's good for you might not be good for me."
"And it might. Which is why, on Friday night we're going to the club. To watch only. Now's your chance to renege, and safe word out."
Goosebumps appeared on her arms faster than she could think the word red, let alone say it. Why, when she enjoyed reading about scenes, and had taken part in them, did it worry her? Nina searched her mind. Idiot. He wants you there. You're watching, not playing. And for fuck’s sake, you got bored and fed up, not bared and tied up. Well, not against her will anyway. She'd agreed to everything, even if she did safe word out of some things.
"Okay."
"Good girl. Shall we continue round the park and feed those poor disgusted looking ducks? They've been eyeing you up with annoyance ever since we came through the gate."
Nina picked up the bag of crusts and rattled it. Three ducks swam across the lochan toward her as if on a string. "They know me," she said. "I often jog here, and bring them the crusts. After all I don't need curly hair."
The ducks quacked, and she sniggered. "See? They agree with me." She took out several stale slices of bread, broke them up and flung the pieces out into the water. The ducks followed, flapping and quacking and were immediately challenged by three more.
"See that one over there?" Nina pointed. "That's the Dom. See the look in his eyes? It says don't you dare."
Nina's Dom Page 6
