“Make love to me,” I said breathlessly.
His muscles tensed, and he pulled away. “What?”
“Isn’t that what you want?” I asked, surprised.
“I, yes, but…” He stepped back from me, completely stumped.
I advanced on him. “Then be with me”
He pushed me back, horrified. “No, not like this. You will regret it afterward and resent me for it. I don’t want to be used like that. I don’t want you to do this because you need a release for all that’s going on inside you.”
I gaped at him. “But you have wanted this for years, and now I’m offering it to you with no expectations.”
Anger flared in his eyes and he yelled, “Get out, Naomi! Don’t you ever use my feelings against me like this! I don’t want ‘no expectations’, I want the whole deal. So don’t mock me, just leave.”
Embarrassed, I scampered away. As I rushed out the front door, he smashed something behind me. I ran, and as I passed the still unconscious guards, I realized how foolish I had been. Horemheb had been right to send me away. I acted poorly and allowed my impulses to take control.
As I rushed into the house and climbed into bed beside Rachel, I felt humiliated, and dreaded seeing Horemheb again. I had made a huge mistake, I really hurt him, and for what? Because I was in pain and grieving and had allowed my carnal need for affection take over to remove myself from it all. How I resented myself.
oremheb avoided me like I was the plague. For weeks, he spoke to me only out of obligation. I felt certain I had finally managed to crush his heart. One of the maidservants, as if to confirm this, said to me bitterly one day, “You know, whatever you did is causing me to have to fix and replace everything in his room on a regular basis.”
I knew then the time had come for me to really think about who could be his wife, so he could be free of me completely. For several more weeks, I thought about who he could marry. Then one day, as I helped Itani maintain our gardens, it came to me. Mutnodjmet was technically a princess. Her father was Pharaoh, so therefore she was royalty. She may not have been from the pure line that branched from Amenhotep or Akhenaten, but she was a princess. I wasn’t sure how Horemheb would react to the idea of marrying Ay’s daughter, when he was working so hard to remove him from power, but there was no one else.
So the next day, I arrived early and made him a large breakfast with all his favorites and rushed upstairs to give it to him. I paused at the door, feeling hesitant after so long of being out of his graces.
“Naomi, get in here,” he said harshly.
I jumped. Of course he knew I was there, he always seemed to know I when stood outside his door.
I burst in, and saw him sitting up in his bed. I hurried over and placed the tray on his lap. “I thought you might like something special today―”
“What do you want?” he muttered, poking at his food and sniffing it.
“You think I’d poison you?” I asked, alarmed.
He glared up at me. “What do you want?”
I knelt down beside the bed. “I have a possibility for a potential wife.”
He shoved the food aside and swung his legs out of the bed. “Who?” He leaned closer to me, his eyes narrowing on my face.
“Well…” I leaned back, intimidated. “Technically, Mutnodjmet is a princess now―”
“Ay’s daughter?” He scoffed. “Are you mad?”
“No! Think about it. She’s not a follower of the religion of Aten, she, in fact, follows Hathor, the wife of your god, Horus. She doesn’t support her father, and according to Itani and Nathaniel, doesn’t even like him, and―”
“Enough.” He growled and stood. “Why did you bring this to me now?”
“I just thought of it yesterday,” I replied softly.
He moaned and walked away from me. “Well, Naomi, you may have fallen upon something of use to me. I will send correspondence to the woman and see how she responds. Would that please you?”
“I don’t think it’s a matter of pleasing me, but rather you. She could give you a child―”
“Don’t you dare start all that again!” He pointed at me. “I asked you a question, so answer me; does this please you?”
I dropped my gaze, feeling the pain in his words. “Yes, it does.”
He turned and leaned over his dresser. “You still want me to take that crown?”
“No one else would be more deserving.”
He slammed his fist on the dresser. “Get out, Naomi.”
I hurried out of the room, and once I returned to the kitchen and started cleaning up, I couldn’t help my tears falling.
I walked down to the small reservoir Malachi had built for bathing. I could hear the children playing by the house, but as I stepped through the reeds, the barrier blocked out their noise. I removed my clothing and made my way into the center of the cool, waist-deep water.
I began to wash, but a moment later, a pair of hands rested on my waist. I looked down and knew instantly they belonged to Horemheb. As he began kissing my neck, I leaned back into him. I could feel his nakedness and it excited me, so I ran my hands over his arms, encouraging him to explore my body.
He was happy to oblige, and his hands came up to my breasts to fondle them. His left hand dropped and ran down my abdomen, pulling me hard against him. His right hand slid up my chest and clasped my jaw as he slowly turned me around. I looked up into his eyes and my heart fluttered with delight as he gazed lovingly down at me. So I kissed him. He held me tightly as he kissed me back, and lifted my legs to wrap them around him, and he entered me. His whole body quivered as he pulled back and moaned.
I clung tight to him as we made love, but as he drew me to a climax, I looked across and saw Malachi watching me on the bank. I felt ashamed, but I couldn’t pull away. Then Malachi said, “Naomi, why are you fighting this?”
“Malachi,” I answered. “I love you.”
“I know you do, Naomi, but you are alone now with five children. He has always loved you and you have always loved him.”
“No, Malachi. It was always you.”
“Yes, it was, but I’m gone. Stop fighting it and let him take care of you.”
Horemheb’s arms tightened around me. He groaned with excitement as my body reacted positively to him.
“Malachi,” I said as I looked back at him. “But you always hated him.”
He smiled. “Because you always loved him. Never more than you did me, but it was always there.”
He turned and faded away into the reeds, just as Horemheb and I finished together. He held me tighter as we slowly caught our breath. He kissed my shoulder, and I pressed my ear against his cheek. Then, I leaned back to look into his face as I gently caressed it.
He smiled contentedly and sighed. “Oh, my queen, it was always you. I’ve never for a moment stopped loving you.”
He pulled me closer and kissed me…
I shot up on my bed and gasped. I glanced around at the dimly lit room and could tell it would be sunrise soon. My dream had felt so real. Malachi’s voice still rang in my ears and I shut my eyes to try and bring him back. But I couldn’t, so I curled up to cry.
As I sobbed, the sensation of Horemheb’s body all around me returned, and the excitement filled me up again. I felt so conflicted. Malachi had told me to go to Horemheb, but Horemheb would not have me anymore. I had hurt him badly, not to mention we were literally slaves now, and he had to find someone to marry who could give him rivalry rights to the crown. That was definitely not me.
Rachel stirred beside me, and her hand rested on my shoulder. “Mama, why are you crying?”
I rolled over to face her and smiled. “It’s nothing, dear. It was just a dream.”
“What did you dream of?”
I wrapped my arms around her and held her. “Your Papa.”
Her hands clasped my tunic. “You miss him, don’t you?”
“Very much,” I whispered as my voice tightened from the emotion. “More than I ha
ve ever missed anyone.”
“I hope when I’m married I can love my husband like you do Papa.”
I smiled and stroked her hair. “I hope that for you, too. He was a wonderful man.”
We held each other as the sun slowly rose and its light filled the room. The boys soon stirred and began to argue before Zakkai broke them up. I sighed, wishing I could return to my dream and determine what I needed to do. If I could just bring Malachi back so I could talk to him… but he had made himself very clear, the dream had in no way been ambiguous. I was in love with Horemheb, and he had always loved me, but Malachi was wrong about one thing. I had maddened Horemheb so badly that he no longer wished to see me for more than a few moments.
“Mama!” Ezra bellowed angrily.
I let go of Rachel and sighed. “Come on, let’s get your brothers fed before they kill each other.”
I couldn’t help tailing Horemheb. My dream ran around my head in a loop as Malachi’s voice repeated over and over, “…but I’m gone. Stop fighting it and let him take care of you…”
I knew he could tell I was following him, but he ignored me.
During that day, Rachel rushed to me and pulled at my robe. “Mama! I have to speak with you.”
I followed her back down to the laundry where she whispered, “I think I just came of age.”
I raised my eyebrows. “Really?”
“Yes…” Her cheeks flushed as she avoided eye contact and pointed to a small pile of clothing. I suddenly noticed she wasn’t wearing her own tunic.
“We should get you to the place of seclusion” I hurried her out of the estate.
When we arrived, she grinned. “Itani will be in there, won’t she?”
“I believe she is,” I answered as I knocked on the door.
“Do you know what this means?” She grinned up at me.
“What?” I smiled.
“I can get married now.”
My smile fell. “Are you ready for that? Rachel, you’re not even twelve yet.”
She shrugged. “I want to have what you and Papa had.”
“You know we didn’t marry until I was twenty-five.”
“So?” She shrugged, refusing to be brought down. “That was only because you were married to the king, and you wouldn’t have met Papa if you hadn’t been. The Lord will send me someone wonderful soon enough.”
I smiled at her faith. Then, like Itani had done years earlier after my father and baby boy died, she made me realize how my own faith had been wavering. After so much grief and sorrow, I had begun to forget to turn to God, and so, became consumed by my own self-pity.
As Rachel stepped into the place of seclusion and I saw her smile and wave to her sister, I turned and walked back to the estate. It gave me a chance to contemplate where I was in my life. I may have begun to wander from my faith, but God had not forgotten me. He gave me Horemheb to help preserve my sons, as well as the boys of my family, and he had always protected me. I had even been given a dream where Malachi visited to reassure me. The question was, where was I to go from here?
I arrived back at the estate, and returned to the laundry where I washed Rachel’s tunic. I thought about how she had always been the apple of her father’s eye. He would be excited at the prospect of her marrying, probably even more so than he had been for Itani and Hepsati because she was his own. I smiled. Yes, he would make sure she was well taken care of. He would carefully select her groom and expect a high price for her.
Then I realized he would want the same for me. He would want me taken care of, and Horemheb, with his wealth, power, and love for me, would certainly do that. But I felt conflicted. Could I marry a third time? And how would that affect his claim on the throne and the fight against Ay’s tyranny?
There was only one thing I could think of to do, and it was something I had neglected to do for a long time. I glanced around quickly and shut the door before I knelt down to pray. I didn’t know where to start at first, so simply repented for having gone so long without turning to Him. Then I poured out my heart and soul to the heavens. I expressed my anguish, my grief, my sorrow. I told of my guilt and resentment. I expressed my fears for the future and begged for guidance. What could I do to ease my people’s burdens or even free them from slavery? Then a thought came to mind. Ay was a tyrant; he had to be removed for my people’s burdens to be lightened. But how? I felt nothing.
I finished my prayer and returned to the food storage to prepare something for Horemheb, who would be home soon and wanting his evening meal. As I browsed, trying to decide what to make, my eyes paused over a small pot. I lifted it up and looked inside. I knew exactly what it was―a type of poison that wouldn’t kill someone but would make them ill, and if administered regularly over a period of time would weaken them. As I stared at it, I suddenly heard voices enter the house. I paused and listened. One was Horemheb, then there were three others, one being Ay.
Use the poison, a voice whispered in my mind. It is better one evil man dies than many innocent suffer.
I replaced the lid and gasped. That was crazy; I couldn’t kill a man! But then again, he would gladly kill me and everyone I loved. He already had, and now my family suffered through slavery. Would his death be for the greater good? Or was I justifying it to myself so I could gratify my own vengeance?
Someone entered the kitchen, so I placed the pot down and rushed out. Horemheb stood with his hands on his hips. “Prepare us some food. I would very much like duck.”
“I can do that,” I answered. “Is there anything else?”
“No, just be quick. I have guests.” He left.
I hurried to boil the water to prepare some chickpeas. Then I pulled out a duck, stuffed it, and began roasting it. I threw together some smaller items, knowing the duck would take a while, and pulled out a bottle of wine. I set it and some cups on a tray, then paused. The thought came to my mind again: It’s better one man die than many.
I looked toward the food storage room. Slowly I walked over and pulled down the poison. I poured the wine into the cups, then carefully picked one I could remember and sprinkled the poison in it. I loaded up the tray with small food items and hurried in to where the men gathered.
As they talked, I handed out the cups, careful to keep track of which was which, and as I approached Horemheb, he reached for the poisoned one. I quickly shoved a safe one in his hand. His eyebrow twitched as his eyes narrowed. Then, as I handed the cup to Ay, I saw it dawn on Horemheb what I had done, and he sniffed his wine.
Ay didn’t even bother to smell the cup, just swallowed the wine down. “Another, slave, and hurry.”
I quickly filled his cup and he placed it on the table in front of him. I set the food down and hurried out; hoping no one else would notice what I had done.
As I bent over to check the duck’s progress, Horemheb entered.
“What did you do?” he asked in a low voice.
I turned to him and my nerves made me shake. “I’m not sure. I don’t know what I was thinking but…”
“What, Naomi?” He marched straight to me and glared down at me.
I warily slipped by him, my gaze never leaving him for a moment as I retrieved the poison. He opened the pot and sighed, looking noticeably relieved. “This won’t kill him you know, thank goodness.”
“I thought you wanted him dead,” I responded.
He pointed at me angrily. “Not by your hand.”
“You have killed many, why am I any different?”
His eyes flashed with rage. “Because you are pure, untainted by such things, and I want to keep you that way.”
I wrapped my hand over his as it clenched the pot. “Then I will weaken him and you will deal the final blow.”
He stared into my eyes before his gaze fell to the pot. “What are you thinking?”
That was a very good question. I racked my brains for an answer, then it came to me. “He enjoys my food, does he not?”
“He does, yes.” Horemheb scowled.
> “Then encourage him to come here regularly to discuss war or whatever it is you men talk about, and I will administer this to him each time. With his old age, the physicians will think nothing of his weakening state, and will simply believe it is time catching up with him.”
“Then, when he is weak enough, I will overpower him and give him the last dose of something that is truly deadly, and because he was growing ill, no one will suspect foul play.”
“Exactly.”
He stared at me as a grin slowly grew. “Very clever, Naomi. However, this poison can take time, and the effects vary from person to person. Are you patient enough for that?”
“I have suffered by his hand for twenty years.” I clenched my fists. “What is a few months more?”
He pushed the pot into my hands.
“It sounds like we have a plan.” He stepped back, looking me over slowly. “Can you live with this?”
“Does he live with murdering my son?”
He smiled. “Very well. I swear to you, I will do my part when the time comes.”
He bowed and left to return to his guests.
he poison did take a while to have a noticeable effect, but after I slipped some into Ay’s food for the sixth time, he began to feel weak.
Meanwhile, the annual festival came around again. My sisters and our firstborn daughters danced with me, along with Samuel’s daughters, so our group had grown quite large. As we danced, I saw the young men pay a great deal of attention to Rachel. As she pranced and spun, I noticed how much she was like me when I was her age. She was flirtatious and charming, and very healthy and strong. If any of the men were to find out she was of age, I would find myself with a line up and down the street. When we went to collect our men, I grabbed Tobiah, who had agreed beforehand to dance with me, and Rachel rushed at a handsome boy of about sixteen. He looked stunned, and his friends and family cheered him and patting his back as she dragged him out into the square.
KIYA: Rise of a New Dynasty (Kiya Trilogy Book 3) Page 20
