“I like the thought of that, it gives me hope that I might see him again one day. I told Rahni that he went to heaven to become an angel so that he can watch over us. I had no idea what to tell her. How do you explain to a seven year old what happens when you die? Especially when no-one really knows.”
“You’ve done a good job just with that explanation. I probably would have just frozen. Can I ask a silly question?”
“No such thing as a silly question - go ahead.”
“Do you believe in ghosts? Not just the weird feeling, but in actual ghosts that can walk around and do things? Someone you don’t know but might just be hanging around?”
“I’m sceptical. When we were looking at buying this house, people used to say it was haunted, but I don’t know. I have never seen one here, or anywhere else to be honest. Why do you ask?”
“Just curious. Staying in a big old house like this one, I guess it plays on your mind a bit. Ghosts or not, you know you will see James again. A love like yours doesn’t just disappear.”
“I hope so,” she took a death breath. “Anyway, that’s not solving our problem of right now. All these papers must mean something.” She gave up going through each page separately and tipped the whole contents of the draw onto the desktop. Together, they made two piles of paper, one was the run of the mill bank statements and ordinary filing, the second was for follow up.
Within half an hour they had cleared not only the desktop, but the other three drawers too. Thankfully, the ordinary pile was a lot higher than the other pile. Cate placed all the documents on the former pile into a folder and propped it up on the bookcase. She picked up the ‘needs further investigation’ pile and thumbed through the documents. There were a few share certificates that she would need to phone the share registries about and some other indications of investments that warranted further attention. She put them to the side of the desk.
The only other items on the desk was a day planner and a small wooden box. Cate reached for the box and unlatched the hinge. The inner walls were lined with red velvet and contained only one thing - a key. She picked it up and held it to the light. It just looked like an ordinary key, there was no writing engraved on the sides, nor was there a key ring to go with it. It could have opened anything and everything for all she could tell.
“What do you think it’s for?” Charlie asked, also looking at the key as if it would tell them all its secrets.
“I have no idea. It could be a house key. It’s definitely not a car key, it’s too small.”
“He kept it in a box all by itself, it must be something special. Do you have a safety deposit box, locker, or anything?”
“Not that I know of. If it was a locker, it should have the company’s logo on it. This one says nothing. I’ll try the doors later on, see if it fits anything. It’s a bit of a mystery really.” She replaced the key back in the box and moved her attention to the day planner. She thumbed through each page. James had died late in the year so the diary was almost full with his appointments, lists, and reminders.
Charlie read through some of the entries over Cate’s shoulder. They were mostly mundane tasks. “Bring home milk” appeared a few times, as did his various work appointments. Cate stopped on the page that held her birthday. In capital letters James had written “CATE’S BIRTHDAY - DON’T FORGET PRESENT!”. He had even circled the entry, he was obviously paranoid about forgetting. Or maybe he had made the mistake of forgetting in the past and suffered the wrath of her sister as a consequence. James wouldn’t be the fool twice, he was smarter than that.
Cate kept flicking through the pages, trying to hold back the tears. Bank statements could be disregarded as impersonal, there was nothing of James in them. A diary though was something completely different. Here was something he always had with him, he relied on it to make sure that he didn’t miss anything he was supposed to do. It was his personal bible and something that was very unique to him. It reeked of James on every single page.
Towards the end, the pages were hardly written on. Cate stopped on the day she had lost him. He was apparently meant to meet a Melanie Lucas that day at 12:30 p.m. She hoped someone had told her he couldn’t make it.
The following pages saddened her even more, all the people he was meant to meet with - he never in a million years would have thought that he wouldn’t make it to the appointments.
She reached the end and started flicking back the other way. For no other reason except she didn’t know what else to do. She couldn’t just throw out the diary, but what else was she going to do with it? She looked at the names listed on the pages. Cate recognised some as his business colleagues, she could recall their faces from office Christmas parties. There was one name that kept popping out at her and was recurring on a very regular basis. Melanie Lucas first appeared in August and was slated to be met every other week from then on. Right up until the day he died, literally. She hadn’t heard the name before, nor could she recall James ever mentioning her.
“The name Melanie Lucas keeps appearing. I wonder who she is,” Cate was speaking out loud more to herself than Charlie.
“A business associate maybe?”
“Probably. I don’t remember James talking about her though. He usually talked quite a bit about the people at work. He’d keep me updated with the office politics and the like. I guess I’ll ask around tomorrow when I’m in the office picking up his things.”
“You’ll probably run right in to her there.”
“Probably.”
Cate took the diary and box containing the key and left the room. She had dealt with enough memories for one night, she was suddenly very tired. She put Rahni to bed and then retired to her own room, leaving Blair and Charlie to watch the end of the movie.
“Find anything interesting?” Blair asked as the credits were starting to roll and the theme song was playing.
“Not really. There was a key but it looked pretty ordinary. Cate might have some investments that James bought, shares mainly. How was the movie?”
“Shrek-a-licious. Rahni enjoyed herself, it cracked her up. I think it might be bed time though, what do you think?”
“I guess it’s getting late, we probably should try and get some sleep. What are we tackling tomorrow?” They managed to get themselves off the lounge before heading towards the staircase.
“I was thinking about fixing the balcony tomorrow, it’s a bit shaky in parts. But I’ll need some supplies, I’ll have to visit the hardware store before I do anything.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
They reached their room and took the shower in turns before turning off the lights and climbing into bed. Blair opened a window to let the cool night air in. The room was subject to the afternoon sun and usually stayed quite warm until well into the night.
Charlie closed her eyes, she wasn’t really tired and didn’t feel like sleeping at all. She was worried she would have another nightmare again, maybe this time the coldness of the black hole wouldn’t let her wake up again.
She opened her eyes, giving up on sleep altogether. It was going to have to sneak up on her. She stared at the ceiling, time passing as if a minute took an hour. She looked over at the old-fashion wall clock that was hanging above the bedside table, it read 1:25 a.m. She turned over to face Blair, he looked very still.
“Blair, are you awake?” She whispered and watched his shadowed face for movement. She was hoping he would be awoken by her question, but from the looks of it, it didn’t work. She gave him a small nudge in the arm, again he didn’t stir awake. Giving up on having some company, she rolled back the bed covers and sat up, swinging her legs over the side. Her feet found her slippers and she crept out of the room, not really trying to be quiet. She took one last glance back at her boyfriend, he hadn’t moved.
Out in the corridor, Charlie made more of an effort to be quiet - she didn’t want everyone in the household awake. The floorboards creaked under her footsteps as she got closer to the stairs. She was carefu
l to only turn on the most essential of lights. The chandelier over the staircase twinkled as she flicked the switch on. She descended the stairs one at a time, slowly to make sure she didn’t trip. When she reached the last one she turned right and headed into the kitchen. A glass of milk might make her more prone to sleep.
She turned on the light and the room lit up. It was so tidy, all the dishes from the previous day had already been washed, dried, and put away. Not that she would have expected anything else, Cate was the tidiest person she knew - it would have killed her to have a messy kitchen. She walked over to the refrigerator and pulled open the door. As she looked for the milk, she thought she could hear creaking on the staircase. “Blair must have finally woken up,” she thought to herself. She found the milk and took out the carton.
The footsteps were getting closer to the ground floor. She searched in the cupboards for a saucepan and turned on the stove. Pouring the milk into the pan, she waited for it to heat up. She continued stirring the liquid so it wouldn’t stick to the pan and burn when she heard the footsteps leave the stairs and approach the kitchen. Her back was to the door but she knew Blair was standing there at the doorway. She could feel him looking at her.
“I’m making some warm milk, would you like some?” There was no answer. She turned around, the room was empty. “Blair?” She called out softly to the room.
“Blair? It’s not funny, I know you’re here. Do you want some milk or not?” No answer. She turned the stove down and placed the spoon to rest on the countertop. She walked to the doorway and looked into the dark hallway, expecting to see Blair laughing away to himself. He wasn’t around the corner. She hurried into the living room, it too was empty. She considered going down the hallway to the back rooms but couldn’t do it - it was unlikely he would be hiding there anyway. She returned to the kitchen.
The milk was starting to burn in the saucepan. She turned the stove off and moved the pan onto an empty hotplate. Finding a ceramic mug, she poured the milk quickly. Hot steam floated out of the mug. She reached for the spoon to get the last of the milk out of the pan but couldn’t find it. She returned the saucepan to the stove and looked at the countertop. There was a little puddle of milk where the spoon had been resting. She searched the rest of the counter with her eyes, trying to locate where else it could be. She didn’t remember moving it, but you never know - she had been momentarily interrupted.
Charlie walked around the kitchen, searching everywhere for the spoon. She checked in the sink, nothing there. She checked the floor, nothing. She looked in the pantry, fridge, and even the freezer. There were no signs of it anywhere. She retraced her steps into the living room, maybe she took it with her and dropped it along the way without realizing. There was nothing on the floor. Bemused, she went back into the kitchen to where the steaming mug was sitting on the countertop. She picked it up and took a sip, it was still too hot to drink, she put it back on the counter.
She couldn’t drop the feeling that she was being watched, it was as if someone was standing in the room with her. She had been certain that it was Blair playing a practical joke on her, but she couldn’t find him. It wasn’t like him to carry on the joke for this long anyway, he would have given himself away by chuckling aloud. He wouldn’t have been able to contain his laughter at seeing her so scared.
She was starting to get creeped out by the room. She looked down at the counter to pick up her mug again. She would rather take it back to the room than stand there any longer. As she clasped her hand around the handle, she noticed something. The spoon was sitting beside the mug. She picked it up with her other hand, hardly able to believe it. She swore it had not been there before, she had looked so carefully for it. There was no way it could have been sitting there the whole time. It could not have been there in plain sight, she would have seen it. She dropped the spoon back on the countertop, it was freezing cold - too cold to keep holding it a second longer.
Gripping her mug, Charlie hurried out of the kitchen as fast as she could, only stopping long enough to turn off the light. She raced up the stairs and back down the corridor. It seemed to take forever to get back to the blue room and close the door behind her.
She stood with her back to the door, holding the hot mug close to her chest. She took some deep breaths and tried to calm herself down.
Blair was still in the bed. It didn’t look like he had moved a muscle, let alone follow her all the way downstairs. He was fast asleep. She wished he would wake up and comfort her.
She was shaking and her legs felt like jelly. She managed to get to her side of the bed and sit down. She slid her legs underneath the covers and sipped from her mug of milk. Feeling so alone, she craved to be able to talk over what had just happened. That way, they could reassure her it was nothing, just her imagination playing tricks on her in the middle of the night. She needed to hear that more than anything else in the world.
When the milk was finished she placed the empty mug on her bedside table. She looked at the clock again, it was almost two o’clock. She hadn’t realized how long she had been downstairs. She pulled the bedcovers right up to her chin and settled into the bed, hoping she could relax and go to sleep. She didn’t like the prospect of being tired the next day, it would be difficult to explain why she had been unable to sleep.
The blissful ignorance of being asleep would not come however. Every time she closed her eyes, she thought she heard a noise outside the door. No matter how many times she told herself it was just her imagination, or Cate getting up to check on Rahni, she couldn’t help but be anxious. Her mind was working overtime. With each bump on the wall, or creak of a floorboard, she imagined someone was coming to get her. She thought at any moment the cold black hole from her nightmare was going to start again right in the middle of the floor and suck her in for the second time. She wouldn’t be able to scream or move, she would just get swallowed.
She couldn’t do it anymore, if she kept going with her thoughts she was going to go crazy - providing she wasn’t already insane. She rolled over and picked up Blair’s arm, tucking herself underneath. She cradled her head into his shoulder and forced her eyes closed. She would keep them shut and ignore everything, even if it was the last thing she ever did, she resolved. The noises became less frequent, a quietness fell over the room.
Charlie stayed there trying to get to sleep for another half hour before finally drifting off. To her relief, she didn’t dream. And if she did, she didn’t remember any of them. There was nothing but blackness until the morning light awoke her.
* * *
When Charlie first opened her eyes, she momentarily dreaded what she would see. Instead of the horrible something she expected, she saw Blair smiling at her. She was still pressed against the left side of his body, her arm straddling his chest.
“Good morning Sunshine. Get lonely in the night?”
“Something like that,” she mumbled. “Sleep well?”
“Yeah, I slept like a baby. How about you?”
“Best not to ask, I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. What’s the time?”
“Time we were getting up - it’s almost eight. The stores open at nine, I’d like to get the supplies first off the bat.”
“You’re really into this home renovation thing, aren’t you? I haven’t seen you this enthusiastic about something since they starting having an all-you-can-eat buffet at the University,” she sat up and rubbed her eyes.
“If feels good to use my hands for a change. I never realised the value of being able to fix up a house. Maybe one day we could buy a house like this and do it up. What do you think?” All she could think was how inappropriately perky Blair was in the mornings.
“I think it sounds like a lot of hard thinking at this time of the morning. I’m going to have a shower - try and wake up a little more.” She got out of bed and disappeared into the bathroom. A few seconds later, Blair could hear the shower running. He made the bed and found some clothes while he waited for his turn.
&
nbsp; The truth was he was really enjoying staying in the old house. He wasn’t really into the idea when Charlie had first mentioned it - spending the summer holidays in the country with your girlfriend’s sister and niece didn’t really seem that appealing. But he was having a great time studying the house and working out what needed fixing. He dreamed of being able to start renovating a house like this one from scratch. Sage Manor did need some work but all the hard structural renovations had already been done. He wanted a blank canvas that he could start and finish.
He waited until Charlie was finished in the shower and took her place, running the hot water over his shoulders. He may be mentally enjoying the work, but it was taking his body some time to catch up. He didn’t admit it to anyone, but the painting had made his shoulders as stiff as a board overnight. He flexed his arms, trying to get the muscles to wake up. The last thing he wanted was to be teased by the women of the household, he was far outnumbered.
He turned off the shower and finished getting ready. Charlie was already on her way downstairs by the time he caught up with her. They entered the kitchen together. Charlie saw the saucepan and spoon still sitting next to the stove, she went straight over to them and took them to the sink to wash.
“Have a snack last night?” Cate asked.
“Yeah, I couldn’t sleep so I made some warm milk.”
“Did it work?”
“Not at all, I think I got to sleep at around 3 a.m.”
“You’ll have to work harder today then - tire yourself out,” Blair offered his advice.
Cate made tea and coffee, offering it around the table. “What are your plans for today?”
“I have to go to the hardware store. I’m planning on working on the balcony today. It’s a bit rickety,” he poured a bowl of cereal as he spoke.
“What are your plans Sis?”
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