After a long tense moment, he turned up the music so Jose Gonzalez’s new song filled the space. He leaned back, closed his eyes. I didn’t know how to take that, exactly, so I drove us back to Rosie’s condo, my mouth shut and my mind spinning too fast.
When I exited the car, I shivered, palms cupping my elbows. Even though we were underground, the rain cooled the air. Hayden slid his arm around my waist, pulling me close and sharing his body heat. We rode the elevator up to Rosie’s floor in silence.
Once we were inside the condo, Hayden leaned down to pet Princess, who purred at his feet, while I went to the kitchen and pulled out the salmon. After leaving her a slab big enough to feed Dan, I headed into the bedroom, hoping I’d packed a dress. I hadn’t packed much—anything—when I left Ken the first time. I’d stolen some items out of both Lia’s and Abbi’s closets, but I hadn’t done much shopping. At first, I’d moped, then I’d needed to get Lia through her breakup with Asher—a breakup that turned out to be a miscommunication. Now . . . well, I didn’t know what I was doing now.
“I don’t like the wanker doctor,” Hayden said as he stalked into the room.
“Why are we talking about Ken?”
“The idea of you with him makes me crazy.”
I spread my arms. “That was before we met. And I haven’t been with him in months.”
Hayden stalked closer, his hands tunneling through my hair. He cupped the back of my head, forcing my eyes up to his. He searched them before his lips claimed mine. I gripped his biceps, shuffling in closer. Hayden tilted my head, sliding his tongue deeper into my mouth. I moaned as he sought out all my secrets.
He pulled back and met my eyes. “I’m it. The only one you think about like this.”
I shivered, turned on even more now that Hayden was jealous. “You are.”
“I’ll make sure of that.”
“Sweet Briar.”
I swatted at the hand brushing my bangs back from my cheek. Hayden chuckled. “You’re a feisty one.”
I blinked and sat up. “What time is it?”
“About six. We both fell hard into sleep. Seems we’ve worn each other out,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows.
I couldn’t think of the last time I’d napped. But between worrying over Rosie and fearing Princess would try to maul me, I wasn’t sleeping much.
“Gotta get up now, love. We have a dinner date.”
“We do?” I yawned, blinking up at him. He was dressed once again, but his hair was damp. I pouted. “I wanted to shower with you.”
“Then I would never have gotten to take you out for a proper meal.”
“I like you for dinner better.”
He grinned before leaning in to press a kiss to my forehead. I grabbed him, but he slid from my grasp.
“Shower if you want. Might want to take off your boots to do it.” He winked.
I laughed. My jeans and panties were bunched at my ankles. “I can’t feel my feet.”
He pulled off my shoes and then the rest of my clothes, rubbing my toes. I fell back on the bed, luxuriating in the moment.
“I made a rezzy for seven thirty.” He stepped back and offered me his hand, which I accepted.
“Where are we going?” I stretched. Hayden ran the tip of his finger across my breast, and I shivered.
“Six Seven. I’d take you somewhere else if you prefer. But the hotel should give us the most privacy.”
He rubbed the back of his neck and glanced at me. I smiled to reassure him.
“That sounds great. A quick commute back to your place.” I winked.
“Thinking to take advantage of this, are we?”
I bit my index finger as I gave him a very thorough once-over. “Yes.”
His nostrils flared. “Good.” He cleared his throat and stepped back again. “I’ll, uh, I’m going to top up Princess’s tucker.”
He turned and left before I could ask what that meant. I shrugged, instead focusing on getting clean.
My shower was short but hot. I’d opted to not wash my hair, hoping the steam would make it more manageable.
I grabbed the one dress I found—black with a flirty asymmetrical hem that started about three inches above my knees in the front and fell to midcalf in the back. I dug out my one pair of strappy, heeled sandals and a cream-colored teddy I’d spent way too much money on. I considered it for a moment; the lace was delicate, soft. While the lingerie didn’t add any cleavage to my narrow chest, the cloth caressed my skin and made me feel sexy.
I slid into my clothing with quick, efficient movements. After a short internal debate, I added enough clothes for a couple of days into my suitcase.
Hayden was in the living room, typing something on his phone when I came out. His breath passed his teeth so I twirled.
“Will this do?”
“How about room service?” he asked, his voice strained.
“Just because I’m toting a suitcase and you orgasmed me into a two-hour nap does not mean I’m without scruples. You promised me dinner.”
“I promised to court you,” he said, picking up my hand and kissing the back of each knuckle, pausing long enough to let his tongue drift over them. By the time he finished, I was breathless, more than ready to skip not only the restaurant but the meal altogether.
“You look gorgeous, Sweet Briar.”
He winked, and I’m pretty sure I moaned. That look combined with the rich timbre of his voice multiplied by his accent—I didn’t stand a chance.
“I want to show you off nearly as much as I want to unwrap you. Bye, Princess. We’ll see you in the morning. Not early.” With one last pat to the cat’s back, he opened the condo’s door, taking the suitcase from me. I locked the door and hiked my purse back up on my shoulder. I hated carrying it, but I had too many items I wanted with me tonight, and no pockets.
“Walk in front of me.” He hummed low in his throat. “I like the long skirt, but I can’t stare at your legs.”
I stopped walking and gaped at him.
“Come here. I want to put my hand on the swell of your hip and see if I can figure out what kind of panties you’re wearing.”
I strode into his open arm and thrilled when he pulled me into his side. His fingers drifted over the soft silk.
“Mmm, not much of anything back here. No wonder I didn’t see any lines when I was ogling your bum.”
I laughed, shaking my head. The elevator opened and we stepped in, ignoring the three other people in there. Something about bantering with Hayden narrowed my focus so I forgot the rest of the world existed.
“You’re Hayden Crewe,” someone behind us gasped.
I glanced at Hayden from the corner of my eye, his face tensing in that look I was beginning to realize was him erecting his emotional wall.
I laughed as I faced the woman who was a couple of years younger than me and very pretty. “You mean Larry?” I pointed at Hayden, keeping a little smile on my face.
“Larry?” the woman asked, frowning as she studied the back of Hayden’s head. “He looks just like Hayden Crewe. The singer from Jackaroo. That’s an Australian band.”
I opened my eyes wider. “Hear that, Larry? Australia has musicians. I was told they only had movie stars,” I mused, leaning in closer before winking. “The country’s best exports.”
Hayden made a choked sound and I could see the smile trying to break across his face. I turned to face the woman. “Have you been to Australia?”
She shook her head, still studying Hayden’s back. I didn’t like the proprietary way she eyed him, like she could see all the sexy dips and ridges.
“I hear it’s all desert and totally barren. There’re more kangaroos than people. And the dingoes eat people.” I shuddered.
The elevator dinged, opening to the garage level. Hayden pulled me forward quickly, forcing me to run in my heels. I wasn’t at my best in heels, period. Definitely not running.
He glanced back, making sure the woman wasn’t following us. She was still staring at us, so Hayden
pulled me behind one of the big concrete pillars. He pressed his mouth against my bare shoulder, his arms around my waist. He laughed, trying to muffle the sound.
“Crikey, Briar. Dingoes eat people?” He laughed again, harder.
I shrugged. “You didn’t have to talk to her.”
“Brilliant, love. You gave her a phobia of an entire country.”
I picked at the seam of my skirt. “She was looking at you like she wanted to lick you all over.”
“I know that feeling. It’s what I want to do to you all the time.”
I blew out a breath. “I’m not used to jealousy. It’s not me.”
He leaned down and placed a soft, sweet kiss on my lips. “It’s us. Now, about that dinner.”
I pouted. “Maybe I should just go back upstairs and hang out with Princess.”
“None of that.” He flicked his finger over my protruding lower lip, then headed toward my car. “I’ve made it very clear I’m into you. If you’ve forgotten, I’ll prove how into you I am again after I wine and dine you.”
“I do like dining.”
“And I like eating with you.” A wistful expression crossed his face. “She’s lonely,” he said as he handed me into the car. “Princess. Handles it like a hellion, but I understand.”
“You do? Why?”
He ran his hand through his hair before rubbing the base of his neck. “Having people there to share those moods with—it’s the difference between lonely and loved.”
I bit the inside of my cheek, taking a deep breath so that I wouldn’t shed tears for the boy he’d been, turning into the reticent man he’d become.
Part of my previous job was to pay attention. Hayden interacted with others—his fans, the nursing staff, even his mother—with diffidence. Now, I was sure his mother was the catalyst.
But with me, Hayden was more open. The more he showed me, the more I craved. Keeping Hayden wasn’t an option. No matter how much I’d fantasized about it. When he wasn’t on tour, he lived in Sydney. I lived in Seattle. Which made each moment, each revelation sweeter. And one tick of the clock closer to my imminent heartbreak.
19
Hayden
I’d always loved the quote about music filling the cup of silence. For me, music filled my lonely moments after my mum left, and filled the gaping hole when my dad died. It was my constant companion, the one thing I could truly count on, whether it came through speakers, my own fingers, or just played in my head.
But for the first time in my life, I wasn’t concentrating on music. There was someone—Briar—filling the holes in me. Her mannerisms fascinated me, like the way she tilted her head and her hair spilled across her pale, rounded shoulder. Sure, it all came back to wanting her. I did, more with each time we made love. But I liked her. I liked how I could focus on what she said and just listen. And that scared the shit out of me.
Music was my buffer. My escape. And with Briar, I didn’t feel the compulsion to seek it out. To use it—to keep away whatever was there on the other side of the music.
I glanced over at her as she pulled up to the valet stand. I picked up her hand where it rested in her lap and kissed her middle knuckle. She smiled at me, a real one that lit up her eyes and made them bluer than the ocean just beyond Brighton.
“I’m looking forward to eating here,” she said.
“Ah, but there’s more to the evening than just dining.”
She raised one of those thin brown brows and waited. I clamped my lips together and shook my head.
“Nope. I’m not going to let you do your quince.”
She rolled her eyes and giggled. “I have no idea what you just said.”
“It’s like we almost speak the same language.”
Her eyes flared, and that blush I’d come to love bloomed across her cheeks. “We seem to understand each other pretty well.”
I leaned toward her, using my far hand to cup her jaw. “Keep that up and you won’t get out of the car.”
“That’s a possibility?” Her voice was breathy.
A young man in uniform walked toward the car. The valet.
“Not with a valet standing there. And, anyway, I have plans,” I said. “Courting plans.”
I opened my door and stepped out. The valet opened Briar’s door and helped her out of the car. We met near the boot, and the distinct click of a camera filled the air. I tried to keep my body relaxed, but Briar glanced up into my face. After searching, her eyes lit on the paparazzi off to our left, near the entrance.
“Come on,” I said on a sigh. I opened the boot and pulled out her luggage, trying not to care that our moment was being photographed. Times like these, I wished I’d chosen another career—anything without the glare of fame. My jaw tightened as I walked Briar into the hotel, my hand riding low on her back.
With a mental fuck off, I stepped into the lobby.
“You still have your key card?” I asked.
Briar nodded.
“I’m going to stop at the desk for a moment. You go on up.” I offered her the handle of her suitcase and smiled.
She took the handle, glanced back at the entrance, and nodded. Best thing about Briar was how quick her mind was. Her eyes held hesitation but she leaned up and kissed me. I liked that. A lot. Too much for a crowded lobby.
I squeezed her waist gently.
“I’ll meet you upstairs.”
Her bum swayed in the flirty skirt as she walked toward the bank of elevators. A lovely arse. I really wanted to touch it. But first . . . I approached the concierge and let him know about the problem with the photographer. After repeated assurances the staff would take care of it, I slid my hands into my jeans pockets and headed upstairs, anticipation and lust mixing to form a lovely cocktail in my stomach.
After changing into nicer jeans—it’s all I wore, really, besides my workout clothes—and a button-down, Briar and I headed down to the restaurant. I’d suggested she leave everything but her wrap in our room. We’d return upstairs after our meal. No sense in dragging a pack she wouldn’t need.
Our table was next to the floor-to-ceiling windows, offering an unobstructed view of the sound. The sun hung low in the sky, a fiery ball of crimson that splashed a soft light on Briar’s skin, making it glow.
She was lovely, and I was hopeful we could figure out a way to continue to see each other. I didn’t throw around the girlfriend title lightly. I hadn’t had one in years. More important than what I called her, I was going to miss Briar heaps. Too much to leave her behind permanently.
But my mates were waiting on me, and I wasn’t sure how much longer I could hold off. I’d missed one show, which the band canceled, eating the cost. Tomorrow they would have Pete sitting at my piano. My fingers itched. I hated the idea of someone else touching my piano keys. I’d found the perfect instrument, the one with just the right weight and balance. I didn’t want Pete fouling up my instrument.
I dropped my napkin in my lap as I realized this was the first time I’d thought about my tour and band mates in hours. I stared out at the placid blue water, needing a moment to analyze what that could mean.
More than I wanted it to, I was sure. This thing with Briar caught me on my heels. She pried my stiff fingers from the menu. The warmth from her hand and the soft “hey” were enough to draw me back in. I turned and focused on her beautiful blue eyes. Brighter than the water outside, for certain.
“I’m assuming the seafood’s good here.”
“Of course. You don’t want to tell me where you went?” She rubbed her thumb over the back of my hand.
I shook my head. This was our moment—maybe our last one—and I wanted a fair go at romance. Briar deserved that much. More.
“Tell me about growing up here. Did you live near the water?”
Briar leaned back, and I bit my tongue, refusing to let her know how much I missed the feel of her skin against mine.
Ah, bollocks. Our clock was ticking. I picked up her hand again, smiling when her fingers curled
over mine.
“Not too close, no. My mother married a man from the area. They’d purchased a Craftsman-style home in one of the city neighborhoods.” She picked up her water and sipped. “The house is over one hundred years old, with lots of little rooms. We ate in the dining room because the kitchen was way too small for all of us.”
“So more than just your sister and you?”
She glanced out the window and the light hit her cheek, illuminating her porcelain skin and shadowing her slightly tilted eyes.
“With my dad, no.” Her lashes came down, hiding the hurt I knew lingered in her eyes. “I have three half siblings—a sister and twins, boys. We’re not close in age or emotionally. Lia was nearly fifteen, I was ten when we moved in. The house wasn’t really big enough for us all, but we managed. Especially when Lia moved out a couple of years later.” She smiled but it was grim. I’d hit a sore spot with this one. “Then I shared a room with just my half sister, Preslee. She’s six years younger than me and Noah and Nate are two years younger than Preslee.”
“You liked the beach? I remember you telling me you spent time there.”
Briar nodded. “Especially after Lia left. I never felt comfortable at my mom’s house, so, yeah, the beach was my refuge.”
Like music was mine. “She didn’t hurt you? Your mum.”
Briar shook her head. “Except for the month between my dad’s death and her coming to get us, she was always available. She never planned to be a mom to five kids, and Lia was angry about pretty much everything from their divorce to Dad’s death.”
I glanced up at the waiter whose name, Jim, was stitched into his starched white dress shirt. He was young with a mop of hair that proclaimed he was either an artist or a hipster. He grinned at me, but his smile amped up when his eyes swept Briar. I cleared my throat and Jim, cub that he was, was smart enough to turn his attention back to me.
Crikey, I wasn’t used to this spike of possessiveness. At the same time, pride slithered through me. He could soak up Briar’s beauty, but she was going home with me.
“Would you like anything else to drink? A bottle of wine, perhaps?” he asked, trying to smooth over his obvious gawking.
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