by Julie Eads
Maggie sighed and placing her hand against her heart said, “Thank heavens! I thought someone had broken in; as they did the night they took you away all those years ago.” As she spoke she seemed to drift back in time, to a dark memory that I didn’t want to have to re-live with her. The spookiness of the dream I’d just had was indeed more than enough.
Satisfied that things were okay Knoll wished me goodnight and left, leaving Maggie behind. I suppose he figured if it was something personal, then I would feel more confident confiding in her than him. But, if I was honest, I didn’t want to speak to anyone about my dream; it had been so horrid that I just wanted to forget it had ever happened. However, this was something both my mind and the universe wasn’t going to allow to happen.
Maggie sat down next to me on the bed. “Are you okay?” she asked, seeming genuinely concerned.
Not looking at her I nodded, saying, “Yeah, I just got spooked by a bad dream.” I really wanted to be honest with her; partly because I knew that she was really worried about me, but also as I knew I would feel bad lying to her as she was truly being a great sister.
“Do you want to talk about it?” She asked, looking in some way indifferent, which I appreciated. She meaning she wasn’t going to force me into telling her.
“Honestly? Not really,” I simply said.
Not pressing the matter she patted me on the leg, and stood, as she replied, “I will let you go back to sleep then.”
Just before she left the room, she turned to wish me goodnight, “Mina,” she said, “I want you to know that I am always here for you. I know that it is odd for you to find out that you have a sister after all these years but, I need you to know that I knew that I always had one. I have always cared about you, and have prayed every day for your safe return. But I won’t lie or say that it doesn’t hurt me that you look on all of us as if we are strangers. It was an awful thing that happened to you; but it happened to us too.” Then excusing herself she left the room, and I could have sworn that I saw her wipe away a tear as she closed the door and went back to her own room.
I lay still and silent on the bed, staring at the ceiling. I felt horrible; thinking that I had been so selfish since arriving here. It seemed I had been treating everyone as if it was the first time I had ever met them. And, it must have seemed obvious that I did not seem to care when I expressed how odd it felt being here. Suddenly it dawned on me what it must be like for them; watching someone they love, someone they’ve waited for over thirteen years to come back so their lives would be complete again, yet here I was showing them how ungrateful I felt at being rescued. Sighing I tried to fight the anxiety that crept over my body, making it difficult for me to breathe easily. ‘Maybe they would have been better off without me,’ I thought to myself as I drifted off; welcoming at last a dreamless sleep, thank God.
“Get up! Get Up!” I sat up trying to figure out who was shouting at me. Managing to clear the sleepily fog from my mind, I looked around and was startled to see that Willow was standing right next to the bed where, just moments before I had been sleeping peacefully.
“Um hello,” I said, not knowing how to respond to her abrupt wake up call.
“No time for greetings child, you must get up and get dressed! We have much to do today!” she announced, smiling enthusiastically at me but remaining on the spot and clearly not intending to give up on my getting out of bed immediately. Sighing, I slowly climbed out of bed and made my way to the closet, quickly picking a plain pair of blue jeans and an oversized t-shirt, before rushing into the bathroom to throw my messy hair into a bun, get washed and brush my teeth.
When I reopened the bathroom door, Willow was standing right in front of me. Without hesitation she grabbed my arm and practically dragged me down the stairs where, much to the dismay of my grumbling stomach, we apparently weren’t going to have time for breakfast. Willow continued out of the house and down the cobbled stone path and I hurried to keep up with her. Having led me to the front gates she suddenly stopped, so abruptly that I almost slammed into her. Immediately, my heart had a horrible ache within it the moment I saw him. He was, of course, working the gates as usual, and looked as handsome as ever. Having looked from me then to Willow but without addressing me, he went to the gate, pressed the silver button hidden under some sort of gear box and caused the gates to open.
Passing through the gateway Willow called back a simple ‘thank you’ over her shoulder as continuing forwards she motioned for me to keep up. I hadn’t been out of the protection of the gates or the guardians since my arrival; mainly because of the high security detail Knoll and my family seemed to deem necessary. I couldn’t understand or think why I would be allowed to leave the grounds with this thin and fragile woman. It both surprised and confused me.
Making our way down the large hill we came to a stop at a small but beautiful cottage made of the same yellow and gray cobble stones that lay spread over the ground. Willow quickly made her way up the steps to the door of the little cottage before welcoming me inside.
“This is my home Mina, to which you are always welcome. I have brought you here because we have not had a proper chance to sit down and talk about, well anything,” she said, laughing at something I quite didn’t get. Once inside she motioned for me to sit on a blue sofa that looked almost as old as her; it somehow seemed to resemble the one that sat in my grandma’s basement. Sitting down I did my best to try and get comfortable but unfortunately the sofa’s springs seemed to be digging into me. Then Willow surprised me by saying, “He will come around Mina, just give him time.”
Looking at her, I wanted to ask her how she knew that Declan was obviously on my mind; plus I also wanted to know what had she meant by saying he would come around? However, before I could speak she continued, matter-of-factually, “I know many things child, but I do have eyes you know! I may be older than you but anyone can see if they simply look. Besides, you light up around him, and he does the same around you.” I couldn’t help but smile. For some reason it felt good that others knew, and could see how I felt about him; which was no doubt an odd sensation seeing as how, a few nights earlier, I had wanted to keep my feelings for him low key.
Willow quickly changed the subject by asking me if I had thought about the animal ritual. I looked at her, surprised that the topic had changed from Declan to my ritual so quickly.
“No, I really haven’t given it much thought,” I announced.
“I figured,” was her simply response. Then she continued, not wasting anytime, not even to breathe, “Well, first thing first. I would like you to witness an animal ritual that is coming up soon.” As I nodded my head in agreement, I began wondering why she had such a mischievous grin spread across her wrinkled face. Looking at me it was as if she was for some reason, confused before going on to say, “As you may already know Declan will have his animal ritual in three days.”
“What!!” I gasped! “Wait,” I started saying, putting up my hand as if to object. “I don’t think that he would want me there,” my voice seemingly tinged with sadness.
Willow just smiled. “Nonsense,” she said, playfully lifting her hand in the air as if she was physically swishing my words away. Afterwards she seemed to talk ‘a mile a minute;’ going on to say, “There will be a dinner held for him tonight. We will also be having a celebration for his birthday, as on his actual birthday he will be in too much pain to celebrate much of anything.” And she winced as if remembering how painful the experience had been for her. I could feel my nerves building up once more so I simply questioned as to why she needed me to be there.
Looking at me she seemed annoyed, as she replied, “I don’t need you for anything, just to be present. And as for now I just wanted to speak to you about a few minor details.” She walked gracefully towards the sofa and took a seat in a beige arm chair directly in front of me.
“Carmina, I see a light within you that shines so brightly.” Changing her voice to a more delicate tone she proclaimed, “When I loo
k at the exterior I see only a shell; a hard protective shell,” and she hung her head low as if her words genuinely saddened her. When she finally lifted her head back up her face was calm so she continued with, “I know that you have endured a great deal, and that all of this is indeed overwhelming. But, there are so many things that you don’t know, and my fear, is that when you learn about some of the more troubling ones you will allow that protective shell that you hide behind to consume you, and it will put out that light that you carry within you.” I didn’t respond as she paused as I knew she had more to say. “However,” she finally spoke, lifting her head so her eyes met mine, and she went on to say, “There are times when I see that light break through. It is as if you are surrounded by a large halo, a golden aura which only gleams when you are with Declan.”
My hand started trembling as I could see where this conversation was leading. I wanted to jump up and storm out of the cottage; but I couldn’t. My mind was intrigued and I wanted to hear what else Willow had to say. Oddly enough my heart felt as if it had picked up a tremendous pace; as if it was excited to hear what it already knew to be true, what it had already tried to show me.
Sitting back I quietly waited for Willow to continue talking, once she had taken another sip from the porcelain cup of whatever it was she was drinking. “I know that you are so young, and it still baffles my mind because you two are the youngest couple to whom this has happened in all of the village’s history; and in such a short amount of time too,” she sounded whimsical. “Carmina,” she continued, holding my gaze, “You and Declan are soul mates.”
Despite this mind-blowing statement she seemed to sit relaxed; talking in such a casual tone, as if she hadn’t just told me a most important, life altering fact. From the feeling in my heart I knew what she had said was true. There was no questioning it, for it had known from the first time I had laid eyes on him; that I would never look at anyone the same way I did him.
Willow, who I guess was sitting quietly while she contemplated what to say next, finally spoke, “It is such a wonderful gift among our kind; to be given your soul-mate. Remember we are different than humans. We don’t choose who we love, the universe chooses for us. And we love so deeply that when we were created the goddess herself thought it would be best that we only have one true love to keep us from the pain that humans sadly endure. The goddess selects a perfect match for us, but fate will only lead two bound souls together when the time is right. It is an amazing thing, to be born to complete someone, and they you but, with that wonderful gift there is a heavy burden that follows it as it does many others.”
Then taking a breath she warned, “If you were to lose your soul mate, you would never love again. If you hurt them, then you will feel their pain. And, without them,” she started but I stopped her, finishing the sentence for her, “You will never be whole again.” She looked at me with understanding and smiled.
Although I knew better than to ask I knew I couldn’t help opening my big mouth so blurted out the question, “Well, if everyone has a soul mate, why don’t you?”
Willow grew frigid, looking hurt by my question. She began pacing the floor. “I was hoping you wouldn’t ask that,” she replied in a defeated tone, hesitating to respond. Finally she told me, “He is dead.” She said it simply, trying to appear stronger than perhaps she felt. I only knew this because I recognized that I had been doing the same ever since I had arrived here.
Slowly she began explaining, “He was an amazing warrior. Yet, he was the most gentle and kindest man I have ever known. It still amazes me to this day how someone could look so kind and be, so fierce. When he wielded a sword he did so with such deadly precision. He was by far the villages most prized and beloved man.” Pausing for a moment she continued, the sound of pride in her voice, “Women fawned over him,” and a smirk spread across her face, “but I was the lucky one; the one whom the universe selected for him.” Taking a haggard breathe she went on. “We lived together for decades; until he was killed by an invasion,” she announced; a fierce look of revenge spreading across her delicate features. At that very moment she looked like a force to be reckoned with.
Not wanting to break the silence, but knowing I had no choice, I and walked over to her and gently placed my hand lightly on her shoulder, as I said in all innocence, “I am sorry for your loss. I too have lost those close to me. I know how you feel.”
Standing she looked at me, suddenly enraged and screeched out, “No! Don’t compare the loss of those repulsive creatures, to the most caring and loving man. The loss of them was a blessing. The loss of him was a tragedy that will be mourned by many. No-one will mourn their loss because they were nothing more than evil creatures that destroyed everything in their path.”
Shocked by her reaction and even though I knew she was right, that my pretend parents had been evil, I still felt their loss in my life and in my heart; where they used to be. I wanted to scream at her and tell her to go to hell for the venom in her words, but sadly I knew she was right. Realizing that she was clearly still hurting from losing someone she had loved so dearly and more importantly, someone who had loved her so much in return, I couldn’t voice the words so I remained silent. She was right her loss was something I couldn’t compare to that of Stephanie and Jack.
Standing in silence for a few more moments, both of us were lost in our own thoughts of what could have been. Finally, Willow cleared her throat, and began apologizing endlessly to me for having been so brutally honest. “It was just,” she explained, “that when it came to matters of the heart she preferred to leave hers out of the equation.”
After I had reassured Willow over and over again that it was okay, and that even though it had hurt, there was indeed some truth in her words, I made my way out of the little cottage with her in tow. Before I left I had agreed to go to the dinner party for Declan’s birthday; not only because I was aching to see him but also because I wanted to ask him what had happened. Had he discovered that I was supposed to be his soul mate? Surely being raised here he would know how to recognize if someone was your one and only, and that was when my stomach fell to my feet, or at least it felt like it had. Stopping in my tracks I twirled and looking at a startled Willow asked, “What if he doesn’t want me to be his soul mate?”
Willow chuckled, and all the signs of pain and despair that had taken her over moments before were now washed away. In their stead was a happy grin and there was joy in her voice. It warmed my heart to see her happy again. “Mina, you worry too much. Of course he wants you as his soul mate. There is no-one on this earth that will complete him the way you will, or might already have. We are just built that way,” she said with another beaming smile.
I swallowed the large lump starting in my throat; it sounded so intense and so new to me. However, somehow I felt she was right. When I looked at Declan, I saw and felt things I never knew were possible; and when I pictured never seeing him again, I felt ill. I knew it sounded ridiculous because we hadn’t spent much time together, and I also knew I couldn’t bear to not be around him, yet some part of me, no matter what Willow might say, still questioned the reasoning of ‘what if he didn’t feel the same way.’
Willow and I walked back to the castle that I was finding myself growing rather fond of. The castle that housed my true family; the people who I had hurt and treated poorly since first arriving. I knew I had to make it up to them, so decided I would come up with something to show them how I really felt. Suddenly Willow cut my thoughts off. “Mina,” she said three times, clearly annoyed when I didn’t respond as she had to snap her fingers in front of my face until she finally caught my attention, which caused me to smile.
As we reached the gate-way she stopped and said, “I will see you tonight at the party. And don’t worry, you and I will find more time to talk.” Then turning away she left me, calling over her shoulders, “Sorry that I am in such a rush but I have to meet Maggie.”
Dismissing her apology with a wave of my hand I walked through t
he gate and finally made my way back to the castle. As I entered the living room I was shocked to see Taya sitting, waiting for me. She looked as if she was bored out of her mind.
“Hey,” I called out, making my way over to where she sat, taking a seat across from her.
“Hey,” she said in a shy voice. “I hope you don’t mind but Knoll and Maggie let me in on their way out. I was hoping that maybe we could hang out today? That is, if you’re not busy,” she finished quietly.
“I don’t mind at all,” I replied quickly, suddenly finding that I really didn’t mind. In fact, I welcomed the company, and thought how odd it was that things were actually changing for me. Ever since I had arrived here I had tended to ‘blow off’ as many invitations as I could; preferring to be alone. But now, thanks to Willow, I realized it was time for me to start making some changes, and so I decided that beginning today I was going to make a new friend. “I would love to hangout!” I said, hoping that I hadn’t sounded too excited when I appeared to screech the words out in a higher pitch than I had intended. If it had sounded odd Taya either didn’t notice or didn’t care, because she just smiled at my outburst.
“Well, I have to go to this birthday party tonight, and I was hoping that we could go shopping together. You see I really need some help in finding something nice to wear. Besides, I am sure that you are dying to see the town outside of our village,” she declared, smiling a brilliant smile.
Surprised and knowing that it was obviously an odd question I couldn’t help asking, “Are we allowed to leave?”
As I looked at Taya I hoped she didn’t think that I was being ignorant by asking such a question. But she simply said, “Of course we can; but only for a short while and, we are not to mingle with the towns people longer than we have to. That is other than for normal things such as greetings and asking directions. Oh, and of course, a guardian must be present,” she added, apparently annoyed with the fact as she rolled her eyes and let out an exasperated sigh. I laughed with her but must admit I also felt annoyed that someone would have to go with us. “Plus I have to get a present for Declan,” she went on and as she looked at me I noted her rosy checks had turned a bright red. I could tell that she wanted to say something else and with a raised eyebrow I asked what she was thinking. “Nothing,” she responded. Then burst out with, “It’s just the whole you and Declan thing,” she squealed, “You two make the cutest couple!”
