I boldly, yet hesitantly walked across the room. How could I be bold and hesitant? I don’t know. Those words just seem to fit the mood I was in at the time.
I sat down, opened the laptop and booted it up. It seemed to take forever. When it finally loaded I stared at the email for a few moments then figured I’d just go ahead and be a big boy and open it.
I clicked it and I read:
Hi Don. My name is Leigh Ann. I’m sorry about you losing your wife. I lost my husband too but it was to another woman. A younger woman. Boy did that hurt!
I work as a realtor and I am also an author and my first book was just published. I say first one like another is going to follow but I haven’t decided yet. It is a children’s book. It’s about something that happened when I was growing up in West Virginia.
May I ask you a question? What does, “Almost whole college education” mean?
I hope to hear back from you soon. If you have any questions feel free to ask.
Leigh Ann
So she grew up in West Virginia! That was a coincidence I wasn’t expecting. She lived on the Peninsula now but she didn’t say what city. She also said she was a realtor but didn’t say for whom. That was understandable but wouldn’t that be strange if she worked for the agency that was handling my house?
Which reminded me, I needed to call them and see what was going on. After what happened last time I had decided to stay on top of it and not wait around for something to happen.
So what should I write back? I wasn’t sure at all. I didn’t want to seem pushy but how else was I going to find out about her? Should I ask her out or wait?
Damn! More freaking questions to answers I didn’t have and didn’t know where to get them from.
I walked away from the computer to think and when I looked at the clock I was surprised that it was so late and decided to go to bed. I pulled the top down on the laptop. Then I turned and looked at Miranda’s picture.
“Baby, I will always love you. You were the first but I can’t do this alone thing anymore. I hope you understand and I will have your blessing on this. I don’t know if this woman will be something permanent or just a passing fancy. It might just fizzle out right away. I haven’t had very good luck lately. But hey, she’s from West Virginia! You ought to be happy about that.” I laughed. “She’s probably your cousin!”
Chapter 9
I went to bed with my mind spinning.I called the realtor when I first got into work and he said that he had shown the house a few times but when he disclosed that Miranda had been killed there people walked away without continuing the tour.
“Do you really have to tell them about that?” I asked.
“Well, not really. Not according to the law at least. I just feel like it is my duty to inform them. Maybe you’d want to lower the price some?”
“No, I want you to stop telling the people about my wife’s death.”
“I’m sorry, sir, but I’m not comfortable with that.”
“That’s fine. You’re fired.”
“Ex -, excuse me, sir?”
“I said you’re fired. You’re supposed to be working in my best interests and you’re, it seems, working against me. I’ll call your boss and tell him we’re done. I’m done with you. Got it?”
“Look, I need this job, sir. I can do better I promise. This is the first house I have handled on my own and I really want to show my boss I can do a good job.”
“Well, you haven’t. You have done a very bad job. You have probably lost sales and that isn’t something I will stand for. That’s my money you’re fooling around with.”
I hung up on him. I was pissed! I immediately called the owner and told him what the agent had been doing and asked him for someone else.
“I’m so sorry; of course I’ll assign someone else to you.”
I hung up still aggravated and hoped he would get my house sold quickly.
That afternoon there was a robbery at the credit union. The MPs shot the robber so it was up to us to investigate. We worked until about nine pm and then called it a day.
Danny invited me over for dinner after calling Bonnie for approval. She had made spaghetti, garlic bread and salad. It was delicious and we sat and talked for a couple of hours after dinner. I told them about Leigh Ann and they gave me some advice, mostly take it slow and be really careful. I told them I would
Before I left Danny asked if he could pray. I bowed my head and listened to my friend’s words:
“Lord, we thank you for this day we have had. Please be with the family of the man that was killed today at the credit union. We pray for all of the soldiers and sailors in harm’s way overseas.
But especially we pray for our friend, Don. Please let him feel Your presence and guide his path. He has suffered a terrible tragedy, Lord, and he has been strong but he needs your strength to move forward in his life. Watch over him. In Your Son’s Holy Name, Amen.”
I was humbled and surprised at his words. I thanked Danny and Bonnie for dinner and went out to my car to drive home.
I thought about what had just happened. Danny obviously had great faith in God. I thought about the time we had been friends. I honestly never knew he was a Christian. Was that good or bad? I’d never heard him witness to anyone.
My mother, on the other hand, would witness literally at the drop of a hat. I can’t tell you how many times she had embarrassed me when I was young. A new family would come through the doors and she’d be right on them. By the time the morning was over she and they were friends and would almost certainly become members of the church and all because of her.
But then our family would get home and she’d fuss at my sister and me. It seemed like nothing we did was good enough. She was always complaining or reprimanding us. There were times I hated her growing up. I never remember her telling me she loved me or hugging me.
Even when I was adult she bitched at me all of the time. Miranda hated how my mom treated me and when it’d get too bad Miranda would just pull us away from her for a couple of months.
My dad and I had been close ever since I had married Miranda and gotten out on my own. He loved her to death. It had truly hurt him when she had gotten killed. Mom shed tears but I’m not sure they were real. She was a great actress.
It was just before midnight when I got home. I thought about returning Leigh Ann’s email but was just too tired. I’d do it the next night for sure.
The next day at work we finished up the credit union robbery reports and were just getting ready to go to lunch when Bill Wirth came in from the other room. He was out of breath and said, “Come here Don. You’ve got to see this!” With that he ran into the day room.
The noon news was on and they were interviewing a police officer. A detective. Raymond Spader. I clenched up inside.
“Turn it up,” I said.
“We’ve been hunting him down for a while now,” said Spader. “He’s being charged with several crimes including rape, murder, breaking and entering, possession with intent to sell and more charges may be coming.”
The screen changed and there was a picture of Marcus Garvey. They got him! Was this for real? I dropped into a chair and stared at the TV.
Thoughts came in a rush; Miranda’s face, Miranda’s dead body, Resnick dying at my hands, all of the pain and anger overwhelmed me. I just didn’t know what to do. When I looked up everyone was staring at me.
“What?” I asked.
Danny approached me and put his hand on my shoulder.
“Are you okay?”
“Huh? Um, yeah sure. I guess so. I don’t know. What should I be feeling?”
I looked from face to face in the room. No one said anything. They just stared at me. Even Danny. I was completely alone in a room full of other people. I felt weak and helpless. I was upset but I couldn’t name what it was. It wasn’t happiness. It wasn’t relief. It wasn’t even sadness. I was just numb. I was completely without feeling. I just sat in a vacuum and if I breathed I didn’t real
ize it.
Chapter 10
Danny asked me if I wanted the rest of the day off and I said I guessed I’d better take it. I packed up my stuff and walked out to the Tahoe, Danny following me.
“What are you going to do, Don? Are you going to be okay alone?”
“I don’t know. I really don’t know. I think I’ll go home and talk to Miranda.”
He nodded as if he knew what I was talking about. Maybe he did.
“I’ll be praying for you. Let me know if you need anything. Anything at all no matter what time. Okay?”
I nodded my head and said, “I will. Thanks for being a good friend.”
I drove home but I don’t remember the drive. When I walked in the door the phone was ringing. It was my dad.
“I saw the news. Are you okay, son?”
“Yeah, Dad, I’m fine. Thanks for calling.”
“Is there anything I can do?”
I said, “I’ll let you know if I need anything.” That was my way of saying, “Butt out.”
I hung up, changed my clothes and turned the TV on. I skipped from channel to channel trying to get all the information I could from each local station. On the five o’clock newscast they began showing videos of him being led into the jail.
On channel ten the anchor began talking about Garvey and reading off all of the things he was being charged with, “…including the rape and murder of Miranda…” Suddenly a picture of her flashed on the screen. I shut the TV off. I just could not stand to listen or see any more of the broadcast.
I began to cry. Was it over? Did I just let the justice system handle this? It looked like it was out of my hands. I felt like I should feel relieved but I wasn’t. I still felt the way I did when I first heard the news. I was empty.
I looked up at Miranda’s picture. As always she was smiling at me.
“They got him, baby. Garvey is in jail and Resnick is dead. I hope this eases your soul. I love you, baby. I will always love you.”
I took a scalding hot shower, fixed a sandwich and sat down at my computer. It was time for me to write back to Leigh Ann.
Leigh Ann, I’m sorry it has taken so long to get back to you. A lot has happened. I don’t know if you saw the news tonight or not but they talked about a man named Marcus Garvey that they arrested. That was one of the men that raped and murdered my wife. He’s in jail now.
Oh, almost whole college education means I dropped out of college at the end of my junior year. My dad had pushed me into engineering but that just wasn’t something I wanted to do with my life so I left. He wasn’t happy but it was my life and I was tired of my parents trying to control it. Up until my wife was killed I had a good life. I’m trying to find that again.
Oh, not that I am trying to get you to fix my life! That’s a lot of pressure. I’m sorry. You’re the first woman that I have talked to outside of business and the regular day to day life. I don’t know where this is headed. It might end with this very email.
I’ll be honest; I’m not sure what I want to happen. We don’t know that much about each other. Shoot I don’t even know what you look like. Or you me.
One other thing before I close; my wife was from West Virginia too.
Don
I sent it and was about to close the laptop when I got an email back from Leigh Ann. Evidently she had been sitting at her computer too.
Oh, Don, I don’t know what to say! Are you alright? I can’t imagine how you feel right now. If you’ll give me a few minutes I’ll send another email. I just wanted you to know that I’m here.
That was fast! I wrote back, I’ll be here.
I fixed another sandwich and looked at my other emails while I ate it. Most of them were junk. Why not? I didn’t have any friends except the people at work. If you could call them friends. I didn’t know anyone but Danny really. At the end of the day we all went our separate ways.
I was tempted to check one of the local news sites but figured it’d just be the same stuff I had heard and seen earlier. Suddenly the phone rang. I answered it on the second ring.
“This is Detective Spader. Did you see the news today?”
I said I did.
“Then you know we arrested Garvey. He’s saying he didn’t do anything of course and asked for a lawyer. We couldn’t talk to him once he did that. He’s sitting in a jail cell here at the precinct. We’ll keep an eye on him. I just wanted you to know.”
And he hung up on me. Again.
I rolled my eyes and thought of bad names I could call him. And things about his mother. That was always appropriate with people like that.
I laughed just as another email from Leigh Ann popped up.
Dear Don. As I said before I am so sorry. I cannot even fathom what you are going through right now. I can only guess; anger, sadness, relief and maybe some other things I haven’t thought of. I just hope you are doing okay and I want you to know even though we don’t know each other well at all I am here for you. Feel free to email whenever you want. If I don’t answer right away I will as soon as I can.
Do you mind telling me where your wife was from? I was born in Coal City. My husband was from another little town close by and we moved down here when he joined the Navy at eighteen.
Do you have Facebook? I have pictures of myself on my page.
I am really concerned about you. Does that sound too stalkerish? I just want to reach out and hug you. I was never a mother but I guess I have that mother instinct. Maybe it comes out of all women in certain circumstances.
I’m babbling now. Like I said I’m just an email away. I hope you get rest tonight.
Talk to you soon, Leigh Ann.
I wrote back.
Leigh Ann, thank you for your kind words. And no, I don’t think you’re a stalker. In fact I am very touched by your concern. You are the first person that has been interested in me or shown concern since my wife died. Well, except my boss, Danny. He has been a good friend to me.
If you want to hug me I don’t guess I’d push you away. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t in fact. Does that sound stupid? I told you I am really unsure of myself and nervous. I just don’t know what to do.
My wife grew up in Oceana, less than an hour from Coal City. I looked it up! Now who’s being stalkerish? LOL
I don’t have Facebook. I have never even been on Facebook to be honest until you said something about it. I’m not really sure what you do with it. Can you teach me sometime?
How would I look you up on Facebook?
Don
I waited a few minutes to see if she wrote back and sure enough another email popped up;
Don, I don’t want to seem too forward but maybe we could get together and try that hug? What do you think? I don’t want to seem pushy but I just get the impression that you might need a friend. I know I do!
Instead of going through Craigslist would you like to email me directly? My email address is [email protected].
I’ll be happy to show you how to use Facebook. If you want to see my pictures you can go to my page. Just look it up with my email name. Do you have a picture you can send me?
Leigh Ann
I thought for a moment and then replied to her email address from mine;
Leigh Ann, My email address is the same one my wife and I had. I guess I should change it. And the only picture I have on this computer is one of her and I. Would that be okay? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. My email address is [email protected].
Almost immediately she replied;
Don, if it wouldn’t make you too uncomfortable I’d love to see a picture of the two of you.
I sent her an email back and attached our wedding photo. I told her I’d look her up on Facebook tomorrow as it was late and I needed to get to bed. I ended by asking her if she’d like to get together on Saturday.
I shut the laptop down and went to bed.
Chapter 11
There wasn’t anything new about Garvey on the news the next morning but I did get good
news later in the day. My house had sold! At the price I had asked. The realtor had called me and he explained what would happen next and said everything should be tied up and I’d have a check within thirty days. He said I had to sign some papers and made arrangements to meet with me at their office next week.
I was ecstatic! I’d miss the house but for now it just brought back some very painful memories. I drove over there after work and took a final walk through. I remember carrying her across the threshold when we first bought the house. I could smell that fried chicken she fixed for my birthday. I could almost see her standing at the sink next to me while she washed and I dried.
I walked into the living room and thought about the nights we’d sat in our loveseat and watched TV. I laughed when I recalled how much trouble we had getting the big screen TV mounted to the wall. She actually said, “damn!” that night when she pinched her finger. That was the first and only time I had ever heard her use a curse word.
I went to the master bedroom and thought about the showers we had taken together and the many times we had made love on the bed. Looking at her you’d never had known she had such a voracious appetite for lovemaking.
A memory popped in my head that made me laugh. We were lying in bed one Saturday morning when a dump truck went down the road. It hit a bump and the bed jumped a couple of inches and slammed down onto the frame. She grabbed me and said, “Is that thunder?” She hated thunderstorms.
I felt like I could almost smell the scent of her perfume, the one she wore just for me on special occasions. I had bought her a bottle of White Shoulders while shopping in the mall. I had walked by as a saleswoman had sprayed it for a customer. I immediately fell in love with that scent and bought her a bottle. To this day if I walked by a woman with it on (Which didn’t happen very often.) I’d close my eyes think of Miranda.
When I was done I stopped by the front door and thought of all the things that should have happened here but didn’t; the kids running down the halls, the family Thanksgivings and Christmases and watching the snow through the front picture window.
Turnabout Is Fair Play Page 7
