by J. H. Croix
I was still disgruntled about that. I had enough brains to know it was probably for the best Ethan had chanced to stop by my flat, but damn I wanted to bash Joe’s face in. Every time I thought of the way Harper had looked when I saw her from my window, my gut churned and anger rolled through me. Even from a distance, I could tell she’d frozen. I’d only been watching her because, well, she’d just left and I’d already been wishing she was back. I hadn’t even seen Joe when I knew something was wrong. It wasn’t until I ran out the front entrance that I saw him. I’d gone from worried about her to boiling mad at him inside of a second.
Ethan stopped walking. We were alone in the long stadium hallway at the moment. Voices from the locker room carried in soft echoes toward us. I paused mid-stride and glanced to him. “What?”
“If you think that asshole won’t be mentioning that little encounter, you’ve gone bloody stupid on me,” he said with a shake of his head. “Head this off, so Coach can get out in front of it. That’s all I’m saying.”
Ethan, so similar to Liam in some ways, could trick you into thinking he was shallow. He liked to tease and flirt and play the joker. It served him well on the pitch. He was a ferocious defender. For players who hadn’t had the experience of facing him in play, he often held the upper hand by virtue of the fact he gave off a casual, couldn’t be bothered air. He hid an intense focus and ruthless skill behind his laissez faire manner. He was a damn good mate too. I knew he’d likely wanted to let me pound Joe, but he’d known it would only bring me more trouble. I didn’t like to admit it, but I knew he was right about talking to Coach.
I nodded. “Fine. Let’s do this then.”
We commenced to walking again, stopping at the door to Coach’s office. It was closed, and we could hear the low murmur of voices. I glanced to Ethan and arched a brow in question. He shrugged and knocked on the door.
“Come in,” Coach called.
We opened the door to find Zoe seated across from Coach. I was mentally prepared to talk with Coach, but I wasn’t so sure I was ready to fill my attorney in because my guess was Zoe would think I’d been stupid. Nothing to do about it though. She was here.
She stood up from her chair, turning to face Ethan and me. “Alex, good to see you.” Her eyes flicked to Ethan.
I opened my mouth to introduce them, but Ethan beat me to it. He flashed a roguish grin, his green eyes crinkling at the corners. “Hello there. Ethan Walsh,” he said, stepping to Zoe, a tad closer than he should, but that’s what Ethan did when it came to beautiful women. There was not even a spark for me with Zoe, but it didn’t mean I didn’t notice she was gorgeous. With her auburn hair, hazel eyes and long legs, she was impossible not to notice. She shook Ethan’s hand, her eyes holding his. He winked and a subtle flush crested her cheeks. Well, well. Maybe Ethan could crack her composure.
She shook his hand briskly. “Zoe Lawson. I’m Alex’s defense attorney.”
Ethan glanced from her to me as she stepped back from him. “Ah. Perfect then. I dragged our good boy here because I figured he needed to fill Coach in on something. Even better to have you here.”
Bloody hell. Why did Ethan have to be so forward? It’s not that I planned to hide what happened from Zoe, but I’d have preferred to run it by Coach first.
Coach looked between us and gestured for us to sit. “Have a seat and fill us in.”
There were three chairs opposite Coach’s desk. Ethan quickly slipped into the one beside Zoe. All eyes turned to me as I sat down next to him. I sighed and ran a hand through my damp hair. “It was nothing when all was said and done.”
Zoe circled her hand, gesturing for me to continue. “Carry on.”
“Harper was leaving my flat, and Joe was on the sidewalk. I almost hit him again, but I didn’t,” I finally said.
Coach arched a brow and looked to Ethan.
Ethan rolled his eyes at me before answering. “He might’ve missed a few details. I’d stopped by his place and saw him bolting across the street. I didn’t know who he was after, but I know what Alex looks like when he’s pissed, so I chased after him. He got up in Joe’s face, and I had to keep a lock on his arm to keep him from being stupid again. He backed off, and that was that. If you ask me, I think Joe wasn’t there by accident. I can’t say he knew he’d luck into pissing Alex off again, but it bloody hell felt like he was looking for a fight.”
Zoe drummed her fingers on the arm of her chair, her eyes flicking from Ethan to me. She was quiet though and glanced to Coach who shook his head and sighed.
“Alex, you can thank Ethan for helping you scoot past that little problem. We don’t need you facing more charges,” Coach said before looking to Zoe.
She nodded firmly. “Exactly my sentiments. However, since you managed to not make this worse, I’ll be in touch with the prosecutor about this. It’s not good to have Mr. Schmidt hanging around where you live and definitely won’t look good that he was around Harper. Did he say anything to her?”
“She said he told her to tell me to back off. Look, I get I need to keep my nose clean. It’s not like I run around punching guys all the time. But this is bullshit. If he shows up around her again, I… Hell, I don’t know if it’s stupid to hit him or not. The man raped her. I mean, bloody hell! What the fuck is he doing anywhere near her? I don’t…” I bit back my words and leaned my head into my hands, trying to gather myself. Every time I thought about what Joe did to Harper, I wanted to spit nails.
“It’s definitely bullshit,” Ethan said, his tone somber and tinged with anger.
I ran my hands through my hair before straightening and glancing to him. I swallowed against the anger knotted in my chest and took a slow breath. It helped knowing I wasn’t crazy to feel how I did, but I felt so bloody helpless. When Joe wasn’t right in front of me, I knew perfectly well it wouldn’t do a damn bit of good for Harper for me to pound the hell out of him. I didn’t particularly care for my own consequences for that. I wanted to roll back time and have him tossed in the slammer for years over what he did to her.
Zoe caught my eyes. “I’ll have a chat with the prosecutor. He knows it won’t help Joe for it to look like he’s hanging around the woman he attacked. No matter what he says about the rape charges, he pled guilty to assault charges against her. Even though the current charges are against you, juries don’t like to side with unsympathetic victims. He didn’t look good before and this will make it worse.”
She smoothed her skirt and stood. I noticed Ethan’s eyes travel down her long legs and back up and almost laughed. If anything could lighten my mood, Ethan looking gobsmacked might do it. I expected him to toss a sly grin her way, but he didn’t. He tore his gaze free and stared at the floor, the hint of a flush on his cheeks. Well, well. Perhaps my uptight, kick-ass defense attorney might crack Ethan’s composure. I’d pay money to see that.
Zoe looked to Coach and then to me before nodding firmly as she adjusted the strap of her purse over her shoulder. “I’ll follow up after I’ve spoken to the prosecutor.”
“Wait a minute. Did you have another update?” I asked, realizing we’d only discussed my little run in with Joe this afternoon.
“Oh right. I was in the area and dropped by to let you guys know the prosecutor was open to lesser charges. Mr. Schmidt isn’t too fond of the attention to his past and would like this to go away sooner rather than later. I didn’t agree to anything and now I’ll be heading back to talk with him.” Her eyes narrowed as she held my gaze. “If you see Mr. Schmidt again, walk in the opposite direction. Understood?”
I nodded, but I didn’t say aloud that if Joe happened to be anywhere near Harper, I wasn’t making any promises about what I might do.
Zoe left, just as Coach’s phone rang, and he shooed us out. As Ethan and I walked down the hallway, his eyes were pinned to Zoe who was a bit ahead of us. Even her walk was no-nonsense, her low-heeled boots striking the floor with precision. I glanced sideways at him. “Don’t forget to blink, mate.”
&n
bsp; Ethan’s gaze whipped to mine, and he cracked a wry grin. “You must admit your attorney’s bloody gorgeous.”
I shrugged, mostly to annoy him. His eyes narrowed. “Mate, you’re not blind.”
“Obviously not. She’s pretty, but not my type. Clearly, she’s yours. Think she might be a bit out of your league though.”
Ethan glared at me. “Bloody hell, she’s not.”
“I don’t mean in looks. You’ve plenty of women drooling over you, but she’s smart. Really smart. Honestly, she almost scares me. I get the impression she raises a ruckus in court to win her cases. I’m damn pleased she’s on my side, I’ll say that much.”
Ethan flashed another sly grin. “Right? She’s brilliant and beautiful. She’s so buttoned up, I’d like to see her lose control.”
I shook my head. “Mate, don’t piss her off until this mess with me is cleared up.”
He chuckled as we pushed through the doorway outside. “Aye. I’d never piss a lady off.”
I merely shook my head.
He flashed another grin and nodded. “Right then. Okay, let’s get you home. I’ll walk you to your door so you don’t hit anyone on the way in.”
I elbowed him and followed him to his car, Ethan laughing every step of the way.
Chapter Eighteen
Harper
I watched the paint roll onto the wall under the roller I held. There was something so soothing and satisfying about painting. It could make a room an entirely different space. It painted away old marks and scars on the wall, leaving a fresh, clean surface behind. I hadn’t planned it this way, but it couldn’t have been a better activity for me after the day’s events. It was only three o’clock, yet my day had been chock full of emotional intensity to the point I felt punch-drunk from it all. The sex with Alex had been, well, amazing, mind-blowing, earth shattering and so intimate it made me blush just thinking about it. Being taken from behind like that in the way only Alex could be rough and gentle at once had left me breathless and reeling. A steaming shower where I got to enjoy the mouth-watering sight of Alex’s rock hard body slicked with soap had been another little gift of the morning.
To encounter Joe on the heels of that had been like a pendulum swinging so hard and fast inside, it sent me flying against a wall and falling to the ground in bewilderment. I paused and dipped my roller in the paint tray. Olivia had selected a soft gray for this room. Her landlord had offered her and Liam two months rent-free if they painted the whole apartment before they moved out. It’s not like they needed to save the money, but they were all over it. Olivia had opted for neutral tones for the entire apartment. They were down to this guest bedroom and the kitchen.
“So, did you want to talk about today?” Olivia asked, her voice lilting above the steady sound of the paint rollers on the wall.
I knew Liam had heard about the encounter with Joe and had called Olivia. She hadn’t said much, but had enveloped me in a hug when I arrived. She was good about waiting to talk. I couldn’t say the same for Daisy, but then Daisy was the perfect antidote to being stuck on something. I kept watching the paint roll on the wall, considering whether I wanted to talk. Oddly enough, I did. But not about Joe.
“I don’t know what to do about Alex,” I finally said, pausing again to dip the roller into the paint tray.
Olivia was painting the wall opposite me and glanced over her shoulder, a furrow appearing between her brows. “You want to talk about Alex?”
I straightened and commenced to roll more paint on the wall as I moved to the lower section. “I suppose you think I might want to talk about seeing Joe. Funny thing is all this stuff getting stirred up around him has been good. I mean, it sucks to see him. I’d be happy if he moved to another planet and I never had to see him again. But, it’s ended up being good because I’m doing okay. Don’t get me wrong, I freak out inside, but then I bounce back.”
I glanced over my shoulder to see Olivia had stopped painting, the roller in her hand pressed against the wall and paint starting to run in drips below it. “Hey, keep moving,” I said, gesturing with my elbow to the wall.
“Oh, right,” she said, turning back and starting to paint again. “Well, I guess that’s good then. Weird, but good. Wait, I didn’t mean to say it was weird…”
“It’s okay. I think it’s weird too, but whatever,” I interjected.
“So Alex then. I’d much rather talk about Alex anyway,” she offered with a soft laugh. “What do you mean you don’t know what to do?”
“Um, just that,” I replied, feeling my cheeks heat a little. This whole Alex thing was uncomfortable on so many levels. I’d been a bit relieved, to be honest, to figure relationships just weren’t my thing after what happened. The drama, the uncertainty, all of that was something I thought I’d get to escape. Then along came Alex. One kiss nearly melted me. My silly fling idea was looking sillier by the day. Even worse, my past experiences with relationships hadn’t prepared me for the feelings Alex elicited—this intense need to connect, a seemingly insatiable longing for him, and an intimacy that knitted us tighter and tighter together every time I was with him.
I heard nothing but the sound of paint rollers moving in unison for a few beats and started to wonder if Olivia was going to reply and got anxious about it. I felt so silly and ridiculous. Daisy had presciently tried to point out that my whole idea of a fling didn’t quite suit my personality, but I’d dismissed her. I’d been too caught up in the chance to bolt past my buried fears about having sex. With anyone. Ever again.
“Okay, I’m going to be blunt here. It’s obvious you like Alex. A lot. I thought you were crazy to jump into bed with him because it just wasn’t like you. The only reason I didn’t get all protective about it was because I know what a good guy Alex is. He wouldn’t hurt a fly.” She stopped to dip her roller in the paint tray and glanced to me. “Okay, well, he punched Joe but Joe deserved a lot worse.”
She straightened and resumed painting. “It’s also obvious Alex likes you. A lot, a lot. Liam’s convinced Alex is done for when it comes to you.”
“Done for?”
“He thinks Alex’s in love and that’s it. Alex is super loyal to his friends and family. According to Liam, he sends money back to his mum to take care of her and paid for both of his sisters to go to college. He’s that kind of guy. And now Liam thinks you’re Alex’s girl. Liam’s known Alex since they were kids. If he thinks you’re it for Alex, I’m inclined to think he’s right.” She glanced over her shoulder and nodded toward my paint roller.
I looked over to see I’d stopped painting and drips were almost to the bottom of the wall. “Dammit!” I swiftly rolled over the drips and set the roller down. I didn’t quite know how to absorb the idea I might mean that much to Alex. Part of me wanted to jump for joy, yet it was also half-terrifying.
The paint tray needed a refill, so I stepped to the corner where we’d left the can of paint and carried it over. While I added paint to the tray, Olivia continued talking.
“So if you’re asking what to do about Alex, I think you need to think about what you want. It’s not fair to him to keep this going if you don’t mean for it to go anywhere. But I don’t think you feel that way. I guess it comes down to whether you’re ready for this or not.”
I set the paint can back in the corner, dipped the roller in the paint and resumed painting. “Ready for what?” I asked, anxiety spinning in my chest.
Olivia didn’t even try to hide her sigh. “Okay, you kept me from losing my mind over Liam, so I guess it’s my turn. Ready for something serious with Alex. That’s what I meant and you know it.”
I was painting so fast now the roller zoomed off the wall and into my leg. I paused and tried to take a breath and slow my heart rate. I turned to face her, watching the paint roll in smooth passes on the wall as she painted.
“Okay, okay. So how do I know if it’s the right thing?”
I asked the question, but I already knew the answer. Alex had blown through my defens
es, knocking them down as if they were cardboard cutouts. It hadn’t been much more than a month since I’d encountered him in the park and been crazy enough to kiss him. Now, every night I didn’t have with him, I missed him. I was shadowboxing—with my past and the dreams I’d forced myself to give up. It was hard to let myself be vulnerable. I didn’t like it.
Olivia hadn’t answered my question, but she stopped painting and turned to face me, her green gaze coasting over me. After a beat, she spoke. “I think you already know. You just have to decide if you want it.”
Tears pressed at the back of my eyes and emotion clogged my throat. That emotional messiness I thought I’d gotten a pass from? Not so much. My emotions were crashing through me in waves and threatening to catch me in a riptide.
Olivia stepped to me and pulled me into a hug. “No matter what, you’ll be fine,” she said as she stepped back. “You’re one of the strongest people I know and don’t ever forget it.”
I looked down and realized I’d never set my paint roller down. We had matching blotches of paint on our legs now. We started to laugh simultaneously. After we caught our breath, she looked over at me. “Well?”
“I’ll keep you posted.”
“Okay, let’s finish this room and get cleaned up. Wanna stay for dinner after we’re done?” she asked.
I felt the grin tugging at the corners of my mouth. “Can’t. I told Alex I’d be over later.”
Olivia grinned. “Ah, I see. Might I point out again the list of men who take in stray cats is very short?”
Chapter Nineteen
Alex
I leaned back in my chair, carefully keeping my emotions in check. Zoe had dragged me down for a meeting with the prosecutor. I didn’t want to be here, my sentiments exacerbated by the arrogant prosecutor. Brian Wheeler, the prosecutor in question, sat across from Zoe and me in his office. The hum of noise from the hallway filtered through the door. The Seattle District Attorney’s offices were a hubbub of commotion. Brian looked up from the document he’d been reviewing and glanced from Zoe to me, his dark gaze inscrutable. I was accustomed to players from opposing teams trying to do what Brian seemed to be after—intimidation. On the pitch, it never got to me. If anything, other players trying to rile me up only sank me deeper into my focus when I tuned them out. Yet, here with him, I had to try to think about anything other than why we were here. Otherwise, I was angry. The whole bloody situation pissed me off. Joe should’ve never been given the chance to walk away from what he did to Harper with what amounted to a light slap on the wrist.
