What Hurts the Most 4

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What Hurts the Most 4 Page 6

by Tynessa


  There were two cars parked in the driveway so I knew someone had to be here. Asia knocked on the door and I placed my finger over the peephole. I didn’t want them to see that it was us and not open the muthafucka up. I heard movement coming from inside but no one bothered to ask who was at the door. I pressed the doorbell once, twice then a third time before the door swung open. They didn’t even bother to ask who it was.

  She stood there surprised. Not Ke’unta’s mother, but Ke’unta’s wife. The wife he had before he died. It’s mighty strange that they can’t even pick up a phone to call their granddaughter, but can still keep in contact with someone that was related through marriage. I didn’t get these people.

  She stood there batting her eyes with a surprised expression on her face.

  “K-Keonna?” she finally said. Keonna inched behind me, not at all happy to see this woman. I saw a shadow walking towards the door and that’s when ol’ girl turned around edgily. Now, I couldn’t see the person from where I was standing but Asia could. Her eyes shifted to mine and so did the lady. Fuck was she looking at me for?

  “Who’s at my door?” I heard the older man’s voice at the same time he appeared in just a pair of pajama pants and a pair of black socks. He didn’t have on no shirt, displaying his grey hairy chest.

  “Oh… It’s your granddaughter, Keonna.” The looked they shared didn’t sit right with me. To me, it was a look like, what the fuck are they doing her? Hell, we were probably interrupting something. Because there’s no way he should’ve been walking around shirtless in front of a woman that was once married to his son.

  His old ass rubbed the back of his neck with an embarrassing expression upon his face. This shit was very awkward and I was tempted to turn my ass around and head back to the car. He didn’t even seem happy to see Keonna.

  “What are y’all doing here?” he asked as if he didn’t see his granddaughter standing here.

  “Fuck you mean what we doing here? You don’t see your grandbaby standing here, nigga?” I snapped. He had done pissed me off. I heard a car pulling up and we all faced that direction.

  When the lady got out that I remembered to be Ke’unta’s mama, she walked up. She looked over at us as if we stank or some shit like that. She then stopped in front of her daughter-in-law and looked her up and down.

  “Isn’t it time for you to leave?” she said to her. Ol’ girl gave a pleasant smile and announced she was just leaving. What she did next caught Asia and me both off guard. She gave her father-in-law a kiss on the lips and walked off, as well as he. Asia looked over at me with wide eyes.

  “So, what can I do for you all?” I was a little shocked when the old bitch asked that. Did anyone not see my lil’ mama standing here? I was beyond pissed at this point. “I told you that I loved my grandchild but I wasn’t about to put my life on hold just to care for a child.”

  “But she’s not just any child. She’s your deceased son’s child. Your one and only grandchild,” Asia tried to reason with her. That bitch wasn’t hearing that though.

  “That’s right. That’s his child. I raised mine and he is no longer with us. I’m not raising somebody else’s child. I thought maybe you would’ve gotten the picture being that I hadn’t returned any of your calls. You just had to show up.”

  “Well, with the way you were putting on at the gravesite of Ke’unta’s funeral, you would’ve fooled me.”

  This lady wasn’t backing down. Whatever Asia shot at her, she shot back harder.

  “Well maybe you should have given her to me then. You didn’t so now she’s yours to worry about. Don’t get me wrong, I love my granddaughter but I have enough problems of my own to take care of. Plus, my house is no place for a child when I have a pedophile for a husband.”

  When she said that, I immediately looked at Asia and our eyes went down to Keonna. There was a reason she wasn’t too thrilled about coming here. I guess this old bitch knew what was running through our heads.

  “Oh no… Ke’unta would kill him. But I will say this, Ke’unta isn’t here to protect her now and I know it might not seem that I love my grandbaby, but I do and I’m only doing this for her. That man is sick in there. For Jesus Christ, he’s screwing his own daughter-in-law. He has a problem and I will not bring my grandbaby into that type of environment. He has put his hands on her as far as disciplining her, but that’s as far as it got. Ke’unta knew what kind of sick bastard his father was, so I’m pretty sure he would be very pleased with her living arrangements. I can’t even have her pictures lying around here because he would touch himself to them.”

  She then grabbed Asia’s hand as tears fell from her eyes. “Do you know how much it hurts that I can’t be there for my only grandchild? I have to act as if I’m a selfish bitch that doesn’t wanna be in Keonna’s life, for her safety. I’m begging you, please continue to care for her and I promise I’ll do better as far as calling to check on her. This place just isn’t for her.”

  Damn. My heart went out to her ass. What type of shit is this? I took a step forward. All that was running through my head was knocking that old sick ass bastard off his square. Asia knew what was running through my head and that’s why she grabbed my arm and shook her head.

  “Wow,” Asia spoke. “Thanks for sharing that with us. I promise, you don’t have to worry about me pressuring you about being in Keonna’s life. I’m sorry you have to go through this but I can assure you that she’s in good hands. Thanks for giving me the answers that I need.”

  I stood here looking at the both of them as they hugged and cried in each other’s arms. Once they pulled apart, the lady stooped down to Keonna’s level and smiled. She pulled her from behind me and embraced her in a big hug.

  “I love you so much, baby. I swear I do, and once everything is clear, grandma promise to be in your life more. Okay?” she spoke into Keonna’s ear but it didn’t come off as a whisper. Keonna nodded her little head up and down as if she understood what was going on. Reaching into her purse, she pulled out a picture of what looked to be Keonna’s father, her grandmother and a younger girl that was pregnant. I suspected it to be Keonna’s mother when she was pregnant with her. “Look at this picture every night and say a prayer for us all.”

  Keonna smiled and said she would. This shit was so fucking emotional and if I were an emotional ass nigga, I would definitely be crying right about now. Once we left there, we headed straight to the hotel to get some rest.

  Chapter 11

  Tangela

  Reality Check!

  I couldn’t believe I ran into those two heifers yesterday at Red Lobster. I wasn’t shocked to see them but seeing them pregnant and looking as if they were about to burst, that’s what shocked the hell out of me. I don’t know why, but it pissed me the fuck off as well. Seeing Kacey’s chick pissed me off for the simple fact that he was kicking it like she doesn’t mean shit to him and I’m the only woman that he would ever love, but yet and still, this bitch ass home wrecker managed to get pregnant a second time.

  Now, Quintez on the other hand, seeing his chick hurt my feelings as well as upset me. How was he upset because I let Kacey come see me when he was here making babies and shit? I swear these niggas were a trip. I wasn’t going to let them see me sweat, though, and all that shit about staying here getting my man back went out the damn door. Fuck Quintez, fuck Kacey and I’m taking my black ass back to Savannah.

  When I saw them at the restaurant yesterday, I had every intention of punching that baby right out of Kacey’s bitch’s stomach. While Grisela walked on out the bathroom, this ho Rachel came back inside and started questioning me about Kacey’s dumb ass. Talking about how he was with me last night because he damn sure wasn’t at home.

  I started to spit in her fucking face. I probably would have had she not been pregnant. Only reason I didn’t hit her or spit in her face is because I knew it would’ve escalated into a damn fight. I didn’t have time to go to jail for beating a bitch’s ass over a nigga that I no way in hell
wanted. Kacey can kiss my ass!

  The whole time she questioned me about Kacey’s whereabouts—as if I should’ve known—I stood there smiling in her face. The shit was so comical to me and I knew me standing here smiling disrespectfully, pissed her off. The trick gone have a nerve to tell me that she and Grisela were having Kacey and Quintez’s babies and I needed to quit running behind them and find a man of my own.

  I was so pissed that she was rubbing their pregnancies in my face. What pissed me off and made me finally speak up was when the slut told me that I need to stop using my dead child to get Kacey to talk to me.

  To say I was pissed would’ve been a gotdamn understatement.

  I told that heifer as politely as I could that I don’t need to use my deceased child to get Kacey to talk to me. He’s going to do that regardless and always will. I then told that fat ass bitty I would always have Kacey’s heart and I don’t give a fuck how many ugly ass kids she had by him. My dead child would always come first! I emphasized the word dead. I thought that word was so damn disrespectful and the way she used it made me want to beat her ass.

  Now, I don’t usually talk about anyone’s kids but the way she had disrespected mine, I didn’t give a fuck about hers. I didn’t care who they were by. That bitch had tried the right one.

  “Whether my child is here or not, let this be the last time you speak of her.” With that being said, I walked my ass right out the bathroom. That trick had fucked up my whole mood and I no longer had to pee, nor was I hungry. I headed straight back to Asia’s house.

  Now, it’s the day for them to come home and I would have my bags at the door ready for her to take me back home.

  During the midst of me packing, there was a tap on the bedroom door. Turning around, Quintez was standing there. I just rolled my eyes at his ass. I had no talk for him.

  “Asia sent me over here to check on you. Said she had been trying to call you but you weren’t answering,” he spoke first. Hell, my ass was still mad at him for leaving the day before, after I’d just blessed his butt with some fye head. Seeing Grisela only added fuel to the fire.

  “I’m fine. And why would she send you over here when I talked to her earlier and told her that I would be here all day?” I didn’t even stop packing my clothes to look at him. I just kept right on packing.

  He smacked his lips before speaking. “Man, I don’t know. Shit, she just told me to come check on you. Call and ask her that! And you can lose the fucking attitude with me cause I ain’t did shit to you.”

  When he said that, I lost it.

  “The hell you say! Nigga, you bitching about me letting Kacey come see me when yo’ black ass here making fucking kids and shit. You kicking it like you was just sitting around waiting for me, when clearly, that wasn’t the damn case. I swear to God, you and Kacey ain’t shit. Y’all can take those two pregnant bitches and live a fucking happy life,” I snapped. My hands were trembling and I was ready to slap Quintez. I knew he would hit me back and that’s why I fought myself to not put my hands on that man.

  He frowned and looked at me dumbfounded. It didn’t last too long before his face relaxed.

  “Man, go talk that shit with Kacey because I don’t wanna hear that shit. You coming at the wrong muthafucka.”

  He opened his mouth to say something else but I cut him off by saying, “Fuck Kacey! You think I give a fuck about Kacey having another baby?” I paused but not even giving him a chance to answer my question. “Well I don’t! Fuck Kacey and everything that he stands for. This is about you, Quintez! You should’ve told me yesterday when you had me down on my gotdamn knees.” I then chuckled. “Now I see why yo’ black ass had to run off in a hurry.”

  Him standing there with that damn cocky ass smirk on his face as he chewed a piece of gum, turned me on in the worst way possible. Lord, why did I have to be so in love with this man? I wish it would just pass and I get over him.

  “I hope you and Grisela have a happy damn life together with y’all kids. I swear I wish you the best.”

  “Like I said, Asia sent me over here to make sure you was good. Are you?” he asked with a chuckle. “From the looks of things, you’re not. Seems like you’re in your feelings about something that you shouldn’t be… Something that you don’t know shit about.”

  By now, Quintez was leaning back on the dresser with his legs crossed at the ankles. He had his hands in front of him and clasped together. I ignored his sexiness.

  “Oh, I don’t know shit about it when I just seen the two bitches at Red Lobster yesterday? Um, they looked pretty pregnant to me. So I’m blind now?”

  “I ain’t say you was blind lil’ mama, she is pregnant. Anybody could see that shit. I just don’t like how you coming at me. Not one time did you stand there and ask was it my baby. You—”

  Slap!

  I couldn’t even hold it any longer. I slapped the shit out of Quintez and continued to stand right in his face, waiting on the outcome.

  “Please don’t stand here and try to insult my intelligence. The bitch told me she’s pregnant by you.” I was fucking heated.

  No, Grisela didn’t tell me that she’s pregnant by him, but Rachel did.

  Quintez was just standing there glaring at me. I was so damn scared, but I refused to let it show on my face. I was going to stand my ground and hold this mug on my face for as long as I could. When he stood up straight, his tall self towered over me. I felt like a damn kid. Seeing a figure out the corner of my eyes, I looked over at the door and there stood Asia with her hands covering her mouth. I almost jumped for joy because I knew this man was about to beat my ass.

  “Tez,” Keonna exclaimed as she ran to Quintez. The way he continued to stare at me, I didn’t think he heard her until he leaned down and picked her up. She looked over at me and spoke. I gave her a pleasant smile and spoke back. I then went back to packing up my clothes.

  “Hey Tez. Jay is up front looking for you,” Asia said as she walked further into the room. By now, I had tears spilling down my face. I don’t know where they’d come from or when they decided to fall, but they were pouring. Trying to avoid Quintez from seeing them, I turned my head. I could still feel him burning a hole through my body as he exited the room.

  “What was that about, Tan?” Asia asked me. I didn’t even want to talk about it though. I was so over the whole thing and ready to go home.

  “Nothing,” I answered her in a hushed tone. Taking a seat on the bed, she watched me pack up.

  “Where are you going?” This time, I didn’t even answer her. I wished she would just leave me alone for right now. I didn’t feel like talking at the moment. I just needed to get my head together. Funny thing about it all, I was crazy for thinking he was going to sit and wait on me. Especially with the way I’d just up and left without so much of a good-bye. “So you just going to pack up and leave because of a misunderstanding? I heard you yelling from the living room.”

  With a sniff, I said, “But it wasn’t a misunderstanding, Asia. I saw both Tez and Kacey’s baby mamas at Red Lobster. Why didn’t you tell me that they were pregnant again?” I thought it was wrong of her for not giving me the heads up. She knew how I felt about Tez, even with me acting as if I no longer had love for him. Asia of all people knew it was still there.

  “Okay, and just because you saw her and she’s expecting doesn’t mean it’s Tez’s baby. Tez hasn’t said anything about her being pregnant by him. What she say?”

  I dropped my head because I was too ashamed to tell her that Grisela wasn’t the one that told me she was pregnant by Quintez, and that I was going off Rachel’s information.

  “I know for a fact that Tez would’ve told Jay, and of course Jay would’ve told me. But even if she is pregnant by him, Tan sweetie, you can’t get mad. You know I love you, right? And that’s why I’m not going to sugarcoat shit. You can’t expect him to sit around and wait for you to decide what it is you’re going to do—Kacey either. You say that you don’t wanna be with Kacey but yet and s
till you continued to contact him.”

  In my defense, I said, “But Kacey and me had a child together, Asia. Just because she didn’t make it, I’m not going to act as if she never existed. Kacey called to check on me. Kacey was there for me, even before I left and I was with Quintez. He never turned his back on me and just like he went out his way to check on me every day, I called and checked on him once I got back on my feet.” I was sick of everybody having a problem with me keeping in contact with Kacey, as if we didn’t have a baby together a few months ago.

  “Okay, and I understand that. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t have called to check on him, but does that mean you had to sleep with him as well? But hey, that’s your business. I just don’t get how you so upset with Tez when you were down there screwing your ex. For all he knows, you could be pregnant with Kacey’s baby—”

  “I’m not,” I cut her off. Why would she say something like that?

  “Tez don’t know that, just like you don’t know if that girl is pregnant by him. You need to stop playing with that man, Tangela. One minute you’re talking about how much you love him, then the next, you’re all in Kacey’s face. You need to make up your mind and stop leading them on. Kacey might still be there to kiss your behind but Tez ain’t.” Asia stood up and took a step towards the door but paused. She then turned back around to face me as I now sat on the bed. “You just told me that you were going to move back here, yesterday. Now you’re in your feelings and ready to pack up and leave. You have to quit running from your problems, Tangela. You need to stay here, get yourself together and do as you said; get your man. Tez ain’t going to wait forever.” With that, she walked off.

  I sat on the edge of the bed in deep thought when Asia walked out. She was right and I needed this reality check. I had to stop running from my problems. From now on, I vow to never run again. I’m going to stay here in Atlanta as planned, and whatever happens with Tez and me, it happens.

 

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