"I keep pretending this is all a dream," he sang softly. My mouth fell open at the sound of his voice. I quickly scrambled to gain my senses and mask my shock by retreating in the direction of the sand dune in favor of hearing more. His voice was amazing and whispered over the expertly plucked guitar chords. What was even more alarming was his lazy stance against a tree stub, and the fact that he didn’t even seem to be trying. With the sun still blocking the view of his face, I mourned the soulful lilt in his voice as I made my way back to the car. His last artfully sung words brought a shiver down my spine.
"Your misery makes you beautiful," he rasped as I stood at the top of the dune to try for one more look. I had walked too far and was unable to see him from where I was now perched, but stood there anyway, listening to him finish his song. Deciding that what my songbird looked like was better left a mystery, I turned away, having felt enough disappointment for one evening.
For a lifetime.
It was very close to dark when I made it back to the car. Carson simply nodded, needing no explanation as to where I wanted to go. I thought it sad my routine had become predictable. Then again, it was what kept me safe and away from those who posed the biggest threat to me.
Pulling up to my circular drive, complete with an obscene sized water fountain, I smiled to myself. My home was the one thing I could never complain about. I had the most spectacular beach house imaginable. There wasn’t one room without a view, and I basked in the fact that I had designed every single one of them, with the right hired help, of course. I had lived in my dream home for two short years and not a day went by that I didn’t appreciate every detail put into it. It was rather ostentatious in size. The marble floor of the foyer, the obscene amount of crown molding, the dark metallics and rich woods all contributed to my need to have something tangible from my fortune. No one needed this much room, but the girl who was forced to share a bedroom with her little brother most of her childhood had no issues with the extra space. In fact, she had actually ramped up the original design to make sure there was enough room in every room, even the closets.
Stripping naked in my seven hundred square foot bathroom, I slipped into a whirlpool of soothing bubbles. My phone buzzed with an incoming message, but I ignored it. The good part about being completely independent was that I had the luxury of answering to no one. After a relaxing soak, I slipped on my robe and covered my skin in silk then lay in bed thinking about the orgasm Devin had given me.
Now that was worth mulling over.
When I walked into the party, he made no attempt to hide his smirk. I knew right away I would get what I came for. Making no attempt to talk to him, I made my rounds, never once looking his way. I felt his eyes on me, and the small goose bumps that accompanied my awareness were present with every move I made. He had an effect on me like no other man I’d ever met. I was wet with need for him before he ever came within a few feet. After an hour of being polite, I excused myself to the restroom and was barely able to shut the door when it was pushed open, forcing me back. He stood in his tux with his hand on the frame, and that knowing, smug smirk on his lips. I drank him in, because I had no choice. Tall, lean, and built to perfection, he filled his tux out nicely. His wavy hair was tamed and styled as usual. His deep blue eyes pierced me as he roamed my body with his stare.
"Pretty bold of you to come," he mused as he took a step in and closed the door.
"Actually, it’s not. I have more of a right to be here than you do," I said, opening my purse and turning to face the mirror. I plucked out my lipstick and looked over my shoulder, trying to mask my arousal as I carefully layered my lips.
"I think you knew my wife planned this event," he said, straightening his tie behind me.
"Well, then you better get back to her," I said, careful not to meet his eyes as I tossed my lipstick back into my clutch then snapped it shut.
I shrieked in surprise as he gripped my hips, lifting me so that my knees were straddling the sink. Once kneeling in front of the mirror, he placed my hands on either side of it and quickly lifted my skirt. I could no longer see him as he pulled my panties down until they were stretched taut on my thighs. I began to pant and arched my back, pushing out my ass, silently begging for it.
"You have to ask," he growled as his heavy hand come down, marking me with a slap as he locked the door.
"Devin," I panted, arching my back further to encourage him.
"Ask, Nina. Isn’t that why you’re here?" He took a single finger and swiped it through my sex, pausing on my clit only long enough to make me miss its absence. "You’re dripping for me, and so fucking warm." His voice was lower, rougher. I could tell he was equally as turned on, but like with all other things Devin, he was disciplined as well as thorough.
"Fuck me," I ordered. Another slap to my thigh had me gripping the mirror tighter as a small sheen of sweat covered my forehead.
"That’s not asking," he said, taking a step back so he met my eyes in the mirror as his hand came down again. "Say it."
"No," I hissed, feeling the sting, and bit my lip in an attempt to stifle my moan. I crouched slightly to meet his eyes in the mirror.
His breathtaking smile was his reply before he ran his hands from my hands on either side of the mirror down my bare arms. "Nina, I’m running out of patience. Do as I ask." His hands trailed my sides, down my thighs and gripped my panties. He slowly started pulling them back up when I whimpered.
"What’s that?" He leaned in, his breath in my ear. "You have something you want to say?" I let out a slow exhale.
"Have it your way."
"Please, fuck me." His response was instant and I was full of his fingers as soon as I took my next breath. He was far from gentle as he thrust his digits inside of me. I rode his hand furiously as he gripped me around the waist, plunging them in and out and finding rhythm.
"I love this pussy," he hissed, pulling me back so my head rested on his shoulder. I watched him fuck me furiously with his skilled fingers as he showcased my sex to me. He stopped suddenly, pulling his soaked fingers to his mouth and we watched together as he cleaned them with his tongue. I turned suddenly, snaking my arms around him for support and taking his mouth in a fiery kiss. He obliged, just as hungry. I wrapped myself around him, my bare ass on the vanity as I heard his zipper. I swatted his hands away, only too eager to play my part, and gripped him, finding him hard and ready.
"You can’t deny me, Devin," I said boldly as I ripped my mouth away, planting my feet firmly on the ground while keeping my eyes on his as I gripped him with my fist. "You want me just as much." His menacing chuckle only worsened my desire to get the best of him. I should have known by now it would never happen. He had never let me win.
"I can stop anytime I want," he fired back, zipping up his pants and taking a step in retreat. God, how I hated him.
"Fine. That’s fine, Devin," I replied, pulling myself together quickly. "Gabriel offered to escort me home. I’ll be more than happy to see what game he wants to play." I turned back to the mirror, fixing my smudged lipstick and lifting a brow. Devin showed no emotion whatsoever as he grabbed a towel, wiping the evidence of our kiss in the mirror off smoothly.
"Suit yourself," he whispered before placing a tongue filled kiss on my back and leaving the room. I stood staring in the mirror. All those hours in the gym, all of those fucking fillers, creams, all of those months drinking lunch. What the hell was the point? I could fuck a man like Devin but I could never keep him. A man like Devin had the attention span of a gnat when it came to women. I was a fool to think I was the only one in our six months of dating. Not only was I fool enough not to know he was married, but I was also sharing him with other women, or so I was told when his wife confronted me.
I didn’t have to question why I was still fucking him. I wanted him no matter how bad he was for me. I needed to feel the way he made me feel.
And a part of me loved him...still.
That made me a fool. It made me completely blind. I was
lovesick and dickstruck. Judge away, but unless you’ve been the center of Devin McIntyre’s attention and the woman underneath him, you could never understand. Self-respect took a back seat to those few moments with that perfect cock. And before our relationship became only sexual, he’d had me convinced that he was much more than an amazing fuck.
I took one last look in the mirror and made my way out of the bathroom where Gabriel was waiting for me. He was a prime definition of tall, dark and handsome, and I had every intention of carrying out my threat. I was tired of being the one who abstained for a man who no longer pretended to care.
"Nina, you look beautiful," Gabriel offered as he lifted his arm at the elbow toward me.
"Nina, a moment," I heard behind us. I couldn’t help my smirk as we both turned to face Devin.
"Don’t keep her long, Devin." Gabriel winked at me as he kissed my hand and strode confidently down the hall. I watched him walk away then turned to Devin.
"A bit dramatic, don’t you think?"
"Get the fuck in here, now," he ordered as he walked into the room he came from, which looked to be an office.
"I don’t think so," I countered, turning in Gabriel’s direction.
"Nina." His voice was ice. As much as I wanted to stand my ground, I wanted him more. I took a tentative step in the room and was jerked inside.
Last time, Nina, I promised myself.
"You’re not fucking him," he hissed as he pulled my back to his front and gripped my breast, squeezing hard enough to bring tears to my eyes.
"Why not?" I asked shakily.
"You said please. I forgot my manners." He turned me around then lifted my skirt before pulling me with him to the couch where he sat down. He plucked my panties away easily and positioned my pussy next to his mouth so I was forced to straddle his seated body, my sex hovering over his face. With my hands braced on his shoulders, I watched as he buried his tongue inside of me, making me moan loudly. My whole body shuddered as I rode his face, his tongue taking me furiously with long vicious licks.
"Oh, God," I cried as he sucked me greedily. "Fuck, Devin," I praised as he brought me close. I felt my release start just as he pulled away and beat furiously on his shoulders. Ignoring me, he pulled me over his lap face down, lifting my ass up to resume his lapping. I parted my lips, taking in all the air I could when I heard his zipper. My sex clenched at the noise, and seconds later, he was sliding his girth into me inch by inch, filling me from behind. I moaned loudly as he grabbed a handful of hair, pulling me off the couch and into his lap as he again sat, impaling me. Leaning back, his shoulder cradled my head, we both gasped for air as he sank deeper inside of me. He gripped my hips, pounding into me furiously while I pushed off his thighs with my hands to match his thrusts. Feeling completely full, I cried out in praise as he tore into me.
"Nina," he breathed as he continued his assault. Turning my head, our eyes connected as I noticed the difference in his regard for me. His eyes had softened considerably, and for a brief moment, I saw the man who had first approached me nearly two years ago.
Don’t look at them, Nina. He’s a liar.
Devin leaned in to kiss me and I turned my head hastily to avoid the intimate connection. He gripped my throat in anger and squeezed. I came instantly, my limbs shaking uncontrollably until I went limp like a ragdoll.
"Thank you," I murmured into his neck as I regained my senses.
"Turn around and ride it," he hissed, his contempt for me returning.
Ignoring my phone again, I took up residence in my favorite chair on the balcony that sat just outside my bedroom, listening to the waves roll in and the distant cries of beachgoers.
Summer was approaching and I gave a small smile at the thought of wading through the waves. The familiarity of the act gave me a small amount of hope. I’d done it every year for as long as I could remember.
Maybe I could be her again one day. Maybe I could be the woman who found pleasure in the little things, the woman who didn’t now crave corruption as a pastime, a woman capable of being nice to everyone.
I had treaded too far out into a world I had no business entering. I had become part of a circle where genuine smiles were scarce and the sharpening of claws was a daily occurrence, an active participant in a soulless lifestyle that seemed to have no fucking point at all.
Poor little rich girl, it’s lonely at the top.
This was what people wanted? This was what I wanted?
That night, on the verge of sleep, the words my songbird sang to me replayed in my mind.
"Your misery makes you beautiful."
Sitting at my desk at home the next morning, I cringed when I opened the email from Devin. To my surprise, it was simply my typical morning report of my stock progression. He governed both my corporate and personal portfolios, but I had no intention of keeping it that way. I might’ve been hard up for his cock, but there was no way I would continue to give him the power to shit away my fortune if he was so inclined.
Step One: Dissociate
I wrote him back, requesting all my stocks be temporarily frozen and transferred to a new firm I had previously arranged. He would be forced to abide.
And I knew this move would be the beginning of the end for me. My phone rang immediately.
"What the fuck are you doing?" he hissed.
"Listen to me carefully, Devin. You’ve made enough off of me. I want to be free of you...completely."
The silence on his end of the line was deafening.
I started to speak again, but the phone went dead. A knock at my door twenty minutes later had my heart pounding. I closed my robe tightly and looked through the peephole.
Shit.
"Open the fucking door, Nina. I can see your silhouette," he barked.
I opened it quickly and he barreled past me.
"Devin, listen..." I trailed off, realizing he had no right to be angry. We were over and had been for months. He had omitted a wife, and everything I’d thought about him was a lie.
"What is your excuse?" He whirled on me suddenly.
"I don’t need one. You’re the most dreadful bastard I’ve ever met. You knew I was new money and you took advantage and you won. You made a small fortune off of my investments. I won’t apologize for anything. I want nothing more to do with you. You need to leave."
"I can afford to lose you, Nina, but why now?" I did my best not to look at him. Somewhere inside of me weakness lingered for him. But he’d come a hell of a long way from the man I met to the man standing before me. The memory of his mouth all over me less than twenty-four hours ago would have to wait.
"I want to move on," I said quickly.
"Your pussy is not my paycheck," he said, taking a step toward me. "It’s my pastime."
"Well, find another pastime. I’m done. I should’ve washed my hands of this as soon as I found out about Eileen."
"Always back to that." He took another step forward, the anger rolling off him in waves.
"I know, how indecent of me to bring up your wife, forgive me," I snapped. He took another step toward me, his blue eyes blazing as he attempted to corner me. If he got close enough, we would be fucking in a matter of minutes. I walked toward my kitchen, putting the counter between us. He said nothing as his chest heaved. He looked genuinely hurt, which confused me, but I was too fed up to care.
"Just what the hell were you thinking last night with that little stunt you pulled?" he asked carefully.
I shrugged, feigning indifference, then changed the subject. "If you can afford to lose me then what is the big deal?"
"I can’t watch—" he cut himself off.
"Watch what...? My money?" I was certain that was the case; that I meant nothing to him. He’d spent the last few months proving that fact to me.
I received no reply as he ran his hands through his hair, all the while silently assessing me.
"So last night was a goodbye fuck?" he asked with no emotion on his face. I didn’t even recognize him anymore.
Secretly I was hoping for some show of emotion, but I knew better.
"Yes," I said quickly. "You may not have morals, but I’m trying to salvage what’s left of mine."
He laughed bitterly as his brows rose. "If you aren’t mine to play with, you will be someone else’s. No one is going to take you seriously."
"Wow, now you are insulting me. Seriously, Devin, is this really you?" I couldn’t believe his audacity. I crossed my arms over my chest, no longer willing to let his cool demeanor or my lingering feelings toward him get in the way of what had to be done. We were over.
"I need a few days," he said, making his way toward the door.
"No, I want you to do exactly as you’re told. Freeze it all … now. I will have my attorney on this within the next fifteen minutes," I threatened. He turned back to me and I walked in front of him to the door, my hand on the handle.
"Nina, I’m asking you nicely here. I just need a couple of days," he pleaded.
"I really don’t give a shit what you need, Devin. It’s done."
He took a step toward me, his intention clear and evident in his pants. Our little exchange was turning him on. Either that or he thought he could manipulate me with sex. Not anymore.
"Fuck you," I hissed, turning to open the door. He slapped his hand against it, stopping me, his body enclosing mine as he whispered in my ear. "What’s wrong, Nina? You want to be my Mrs.?"
"Never," I said harshly. "I just want out Devin."
"You’ll never be out, Nina."
I braved a look into his dark blue eyes and saw that look again: soft eyes paired with a gentle voice. It looked like concern. This man confused me to no end. I braced myself for his clean scent, the familiarity stirring me. My nipples tightened as he stood still staring into my eyes. I mustered every last bit of resistance I had.
"What do you want, Devin?" He continued to stare at me, leaving me completely confused because I was sure that I had no effect on him. Had I really been that weak? He leaned in and very gently brushed his lips across mine. It had been so long I’d almost forgotten how gentle he once was with me.
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