by Rina Kent
I can’t believe I took her on the floor over and over like a fucking animal. She’s already too fragile and easily bruises by a simple touch. How could I let my beast side take complete control of me like that?
I reach out a finger to touch a strand of her hair but stop at the last second, my hand clenching into a fist. Do I even have the right to touch her anymore?
“Fuck,” I whisper, running a hand through my hair as I spring to my feet.
It’s all over now.
I take a quick shower, then change into black trousers and a white shirt. Rai is still fast asleep on her stomach. She probably won’t wake up for some time due to exhaustion.
Sitting at her desk, I grab a pen and write until my knuckles hurt. She’s always said left-handed people like me have horrible handwriting, and I guess it’s true. But instead of writing a generic email or text, I’d rather leave one last personal touch behind.
I place the letter on the pillow, then brush my lips against her forehead, letting them linger there for a second too long.
“Mmmm…Kyle?” she mumbles in her sleep.
If she wakes up now, she’ll probably strangle me. I would deserve it, but I can’t die before I end it once and for all.
So I slide the covers up to her chin and close the door of our room for the last time.
If I had wanted to kill Rolan before, it wouldn’t have been hard.
He’s basically inviting snipers to buildings across from his clubs so they can finish him off.
The reason I haven’t done that is because he needed to suffer, and he needed to suffer more than Mom and Dad did.
It wouldn’t have been revenge if he didn’t face his sins. It wouldn’t have been satisfying if I didn’t have him writhing in his own blood at my feet, begging me to save him like Ma begged that time.
But the circumstances are different from when I first started.
He got Rai involved.
If those Albanians still had her, she would’ve lost her life by now. And that’s Rolan’s final strike. That’s the bullet with his name on it.
I might not have been able to prevent my parents’ death, but I’ll protect Rai even if it’s the last thing I do.
If I finish Rolan, the entire war with the Irish will end. Flame said most of the higher-ups on Rolan’s side think going against the Russians and the Italians is madness. Now that the Japanese and the Triads are bound to join too, it’s a pure suicide mission.
Rolan, being a dictator, killed anyone who was against him in the organization. He’s holding them with fear, and as soon as he’s gone, peace will return.
Rai will be safe.
I stare through my lenses at the man who’s sitting in a lounge area in the midst of the Irish’s club. He’s older now, in his sixties with completely white hair, but pure evil still lurks in his eyes.
My phone vibrates and I retrieve it without breaking eye contact with him. I can’t shoot now, anyway. There are too many people buzzing around him, bringing him reports and whatnot. I need a clear shot at him because a miss would compromise my position.
My lips part when I make out the name flashing on the screen.
Godfather.
It’s the first time he’s called me in ten years. I thought he wouldn’t have my new number, even though I kept his old one.
I swallow as I answer, “Hello?”
“What the fuck are you doing, punk?”
My finger remains still at the trigger. Godfather might be in his forties, but he still sounds as authoritative as when I was five years old and clung to him every step of the way.
“Popping some heads,” I joke, because that’s the only way I know how to talk to him after all these years.
“Heard you got shot.”
“Meh. Shots can’t kill me. Not in this lifetime.”
“Heard you got married.”
“Kind of, but it’s…over.” My voice lowers before I go back to joking. “Not everyone is made for married life like you, Godfather. Some are just complete bastards who drive their wives to the point of no return.”
“Be serious. What type of mess have you gotten yourself into this time?”
“Good old revenge.” I pause. “Remember the people I told you killed my parents? I found one of them. I still don’t know who the arsehole Russian who betrayed Mum is, but I don’t have time for that now, so I will just settle for my fucker uncle.”
“Then what? Do you think you’ll be relieved or that your parents will come back to life?”
“No, but it will feel fucking fantastic.”
“Kyle…”
“And it will keep that wife I drove to the point of no return safe.”
“Where are you?”
“In the place where the grand finale will happen.”
“Where exactly?”
“Why are you asking?”
“I’m here.”
I pause. “Here where?”
“In the States. Come meet me.”
“Why…why would you want to meet me after everything that happened? I thought you hated me.”
“I hated what you did, but I never hated you, Kyle. You were the son I had before I knew what fatherhood meant, and that didn’t change even after I had my own children.”
I gulp, then clear my throat. “You’re being sappy, Godfather.”
“And you’re being reckless again. Come meet me. Now.”
“Hold on, let me finish—”
I cut off when movement sounds from behind me. I spring to my feet, but it’s too late. Something fires in my shoulder. At first, I think it’s a gunshot, but no blood comes out. The phone clatters to the ground, the screen breaking.
Staggering backward, I fall to my knees and stare up at the fucker who shot me. His bleached hair sticks out in all directions as he blows on his gun, the one with anesthesia in it. “I told you it can be powerful, Kyle.”
Fuck.
Peter approaches me until he’s staring down at me. “You’re not supposed to kill Rolan. That’s not what the boss wants yet.”
“I-Igor put you up to this?” I croak, barely able to keep my eyes open.
Peter yanks the rifle from my hand as easily as taking candy from a baby. “Boss said I’m to make sure to keep you on track, and that’s what I’ve been doing all along. I’m the one who pushed Rai after she overheard your plan.”
This fucker.
I’m going to slice his throat.
No, actually, I’m going to carve his heart out with a blunt knife so it hurts more.
“I went to the length of shutting her up, and what did you do? You’ve been going against everything we’ve worked for. You can’t do that. That’s betrayal to Boss, and I can’t allow it. It’s time you disappear once and for all. You’re not even Russian, so you shouldn’t have been a part of the brotherhood in the first place, you filthy Irish.”
He swings the rifle and hits me across the head. My body hits the ground with a thud.
The last image that comes to mind is Rai’s face and her soft smile.
At least my letter can serve as a goodbye.
28
Kyle
Miss Sokolov,
I know you hate it when I call you that, but I need the distance right now so I can write this.
The first time I met you, I thought you were just another spoilt mafia princess, but I found you to be a tough bean. You didn’t let anyone tell you what to do and you stood up for yourself. You didn’t stop there and made it your mission to help those weaker than you, even if it meant going against people with more influence than you.
Here’s the thing—I didn’t plan to get close or to learn about you as much as I have. My sole mission at the time was to use Nikolai’s intel to keep an eye on my uncle’s movements from afar.
At one point, that mission started to blur. At one point, the only reason I looked forward to new days wasn’t my grand revenge plan, but you.
The more time I spent with you, the harder you tore at m
y armor and engraved yourself deeper inside. The more I saw, the blurrier my purpose became, the more insignificant I felt. Watching you go after your goals without hesitation made me question my whole fucking existence, and I hated that feeling.
That was part of the reason I left. I woke up one morning and realized you didn’t need me anymore. That you never have. You’re too individualistic and independent, and having me by your side would’ve only hindered your master plan in the brotherhood.
I’m not saying leaving was the best decision I’ve made. It was probably the worst, but if I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have realized just how much you’re an integral part of my life. If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have returned hell-bent on making you mine.
It didn’t matter how much you fought, Princess. I’d already gone over a thousand scenarios where you would be forced to marry me. My plan considering Rolan would’ve worked even if I didn’t become Igor’s son, but I chose that option just so you’d be my wife.
Since then, I’ve been making one move after another with the sole purpose of forcing you to stay with me.
You became an obsession without whom I can’t breathe or think. It crossed my mind that my actions were wrong, but I couldn’t stop, because that would mean losing you again, and I couldn’t afford that.
Switching the pills was another method to tie you to me so you wouldn’t leave. I know that was wrong, but the thought of wrong or right didn’t cross my mind at the beginning.
I realized I reached the point of no return, and while hearing you say you’d get rid of our child hurt, I completely understand your decision. I’ve forced you enough, so I won’t do it anymore. If you want an abortion, I respect that.
My godfather used to tell me I can be a danger to those I love, and I just had an epiphany, finally figuring out what his words mean. I don’t care about people in general, but when I do care, I become obsessive, toxic, and over the top. I’m not apologetic about it, because, in my mind, I’m doing the right thing.
It wasn’t until I saw you this morning that I realized just how dangerous I am to you. I hurt you, and there are no excuses for it. Last night, I decided to leave, and that’s why I didn’t stop. I couldn’t. Every time I said I would, I remembered that it was the last chance I’d get to have you so close, so I kept going and going until you passed out.
That’s why I need to stop.
Years ago, when I became overprotective of Godfather, I ended up hurting him and the woman he loved. So now I’m stopping before I hurt you more than I already have.
I’ll kill Rolan and leave. Maybe go back to England. Maybe join a few of my colleagues in the various missions in the Middle East. Who knows? As long as there’s adrenaline, I’ll be fine.
I have no doubt that you’ll do great whether Sergei lives or dies. You have more balls than most of the men in the brotherhood, and it’s their loss if they don’t see it.
Don’t look for me. You won’t find me.
Thank you for making me feel like a man, not a shadow, even if you were forced into marrying me.
P.S. Kirill is only threatening you with Reina because he knows you found out Aleksander is a woman. He’ll be out for your blood unless you use your recent friendship with her to change his mind.
Live well, Princess.
Kyle Fitzpatrick
29
Rai
My tears haven’t dried ever since I finished reading the letter Kyle left me.
When I woke up this morning, groggy and so utterly sore, a smile grazed my lips at the recollections from last night. I couldn’t stop grinning like an idiot over how Kyle couldn’t hold himself in.
I was looking forward to talking to him today about everything—the baby, the marriage, our future together.
Everything.
I was even willing to divulge my attraction to him seven years ago, that it took so much self-discipline to stop myself from being with him even though I had a major crush on him. That, back then, I kept my bottled up feelings to myself because I was worried Dedushka would kick him out if he found out my intentions. I preferred to have him as a guard instead of losing him once and for all. At least that way, I could watch from afar and pretend we were together. That’s why his departure hurt more than it should. He disappeared off the face of the earth before I had the chance to express my feelings.
Now he’s repeating it.
I’m not fully over the first time, but he did it again. The only difference is that he has no plans to come back.
A sob tears from my throat as I hold the letter to my quaking chest. My heart is breaking, shattering, and slowly vanishing. And the worst part is that the only person who can make it better is gone.
Damn him. God damn him.
How dare he leave me with just a letter? How could he?
But you know what? I’m not the same Rai from seven years ago. I’m not the girl who put her pride above everything else and stomped on her heart in the process. This time, I’ll find him, and he better be ready for the wrath I’ll unleash on his ass.
I try to get ready as fast as possible, even though I’m so sore it hurts to move. The reminder of him inside me, holding me, caressing me, and kissing me brings a new wave of tears.
Shaking my head, I finish putting a dress on and don’t bother with makeup. On my way outside, I search the local news articles for anything fishy. There’s no mention of Rolan being assassinated, so that means it didn’t happen yet.
His death would cause an uproar in the media since he gets involved in many notorious business ventures.
Katia stops in front of me, her eyes holding questions she’s not voicing aloud.
“I need to find Kyle. Have you seen him this morning?”
She shakes her head.
“I don’t care what you have to do as long as you find him. I’ll go ask Granduncle for backup.”
I’m marching to his office before she can reply.
Anastasia is waiting near it, her brows drawn together, and she’s wearing black slacks and a jacket. It’s so rare of her to wear anything but dresses. She smiles upon seeing me, but she must sense something is wrong because she jogs toward me.
“Is everything okay, Rai?”
“It will be.”
“Are we going to the company?”
“You go first, Ana. I’ll join once I finish my business here.”
She swallows, her throat working, and a strange gleam passes in her eyes.
“Is there something you want to say?”
“I…I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
“For everything. I love you, okay?”
“Love you, too, Ana.”
She wraps her arms around me and then retreats, not allowing me to see her face as she turns around and leaves.
I frown at the weirdness of what just happened and contemplate following her, but my mind is too occupied with everything Kyle to focus on anything else. Once this whole thing is over, I’ll talk to her.
My hand is on the doorknob when Vlad’s brooding presence stalks down the hall. I assume he’s going to Sergei, too, but he breezes straight past me.
God damn it. Being treated as if I don’t exist by Vlad, of all people, hurts more than I’d like to admit. I release the doorknob and stride behind him. “Wait.”
He halts and spins around, his expression blank. “Do you need anything, Mrs. Sokolov?”
“Yes, I need you to stop treating me like a stranger.”
“Should’ve thought of that before you teamed up with a stranger against your own brotherhood.”
“Kyle is not a stranger, Vlad. He’s my husband.” The truth behind those words hits me to the core.
“In that case.” He nods, about to leave.
“I’m pregnant.”
That stops him and his eyes narrow. “Another one for show?”
“No. It’s real this time.”
“Congratulations,” he grunts.
“I don’t need your half-assed congratulation
s, Vlad. I need you by my side so I can protect Dedushka’s bloodline.”
I’m going for a low blow by using his loyalty to my grandfather, but it’s the only way to convince his mule personality.
“How about Kyle?”
“Kyle will be there, too. I don’t expect you to be best friends, but try?”
He grunts, but says nothing.
“For me?” I soften my tone. “Are you going to leave me alone in the midst of the pack of wolves of the elite group?”
“Of course not.”
“Then stop sulking.”
“If that fucker Kyle hurts you, I’ll happily torture him all over again.”
“You might get the chance to do that as soon as I find him,” I mutter under my breath.
“What do you mean?”
“He’s off to kill Rolan and disappear.”
Vlad clicks his tongue. “That idiot always did things without coming back to the inner circle.”
“Let me go ask Sergei for backup, then we will sit down and formulate a plan.”
“You want me to go with you?”
“Thank you, but I can at least ask Sergei for things on my own.”
“I’ll be downstairs,” he says, and I nod.
After knocking on the office’s door, I open it and step inside. I pause when I find an unknown man sitting across from my granduncle.
“Rai. Come in.” Sergei motions at me to join him, so I close the door and do just that, bluntly watching the new man.
He appears to be in his mid to late forties. His large frame dwarfs his dark suit. His brown hair is styled back, and he’s sitting in a nonchalant position. It’s not so threatening as to attract attention, but it’s not slack either, like he’s ready to jump up any second. It’s so similar to…Kyle’s.
Tattoos cover the backs of his hands, and they don’t appear like the ones I recognize from the Bratva, the Triads, or the Yakuza.
He’s watching me as intently as I’m watching him, like we’re two predators before a fight over who owns a territory.
“This is Rai.” Sergei introduces me.
