There had always been something about Chester that made me feel comfortable and confident. I felt the opposite when I was with Dashielle. I always felt unworthy with him, not because he did something to make me feel that way, but because he, in my mind, deserved much better than me. He always attained his desires, and I ran in fear from mine. My dreams, the few I had, I pushed away like some Mount Everest. They were admirable but unreachable. The fear of failure made me want to keep my distance from them. Dashielle, on the other hand, ran full steam ahead on his goals. I always wallpapered the background, enjoying the view, but never willing to conquer my own desires.
I pushed back those thoughts and enjoyed being embraced by someone with the same insecurities as I’d always had. We shared the gift of invisibility, if only metaphorically.
“We can do this, right?” I asked, with my head still nestled on his shoulder.
“Of course,” he whispered.
Chester spread out a pallet on the rooftop, and we fell asleep looking up at the twin moons and stars. It was a perfect night.
Nearly.
Chapter 21
“Wake up. It’s time,” Cale whispered as he gave us a gentle tug.
We’d probably only been asleep for two to three hours, and the grogginess was difficult to shake.
“Roe, you’ll need to dress like you did when we arrived. Keep your hair tucked in,” Cale said.
I slowly made it to my feet and back downstairs, leaving the guys up on the roof discussing the plan. I slid back into Chester’s clothes and tucked my hair in the hood. After surveying myself quickly in the mirror, I joined them in the foyer.
“If anyone asks, we’re heading home. Got it?” Cale instructed. “Stay close.” I nodded.
Chester leaned in and kissed me. “We can do this.”
I followed the both of them outside into the darkness. The moons’ light lit the road. The gas streetlights were turned off. The buildings were mostly adjoined with occasional alleys separating them. Many of the homes were dark and sleepy, with only a few windows glowing. We walked at a slow, steady pace, as to not seem over-eager. When we approached the castle’s gates, Cale told us to spread out and find a shadow to hide in to watch the guards.
“Be careful,” Chester whispered to me.
I found a spot near the bakery’s doors. The large overhang cast a shadow on the building’s front. I watched motionless as Cale stood in an adjacent alley and Chester inside an entryway.
We watched the four guards. Two were standing on the outside of the gate and two on the inside. We watched as they exchanged comments through the iron bars. On occasion, they’d survey the area. When they didn’t see anything suspicious, they’d return back to their conversation.
After a while, we tired and so did the guards. They leaned back against the stone walls and rested their heads, if not their eyes as well. Chester must have been convinced they were napping, even though I couldn’t be sure from where I stood. He started to walk out of the shadow and disappeared. I looked over to Cale, confused. He nodded his head, which indicated to me he knew what was going on. My stomach twitched anxiously.
What if something happens to Chester? Breathe. Just breathe.
Why don’t you go find out? No one is going to see you. They’re asleep, and it’s really dark out.
I looked up at the moons, which were now covered by gray clouds.
Shut up, Julia. I rolled my eyes.
Finally, Chester returned to his post. The next shift of guards came just as the sun was about to roll over the rooftops. Cale motioned for us to head back. One by one we left our veiled shadows and went back to the blacksmith’s house.
“They carry the keys on their hips. I think we should cause a distraction and separate the outside guards, so the inside ones won’t know what’s happening. We’ll snatch the keys, and I’ll slowly open the gate. You and the others will take the inside guards. Then we’re in.” Chester told Cale as we walked inside.
“It just may work. The problem is getting the others inside Royal Court,” Cale said.
“Others?” I asked.
“A few friendly beasts of mine have offered to help. They’ve been waiting ages for an opportunity to confront the royals,” Cale told me.
“I think I may be of help,” Mack muttered while sipping on ale in the corner. “I’ve got an iron delivery scheduled to arrive tomorrow. If we could get your friends to take over the carriage and get rid of the driver, we might be able to get them in. They’d have to hide away in the back under some of the iron, which would be a bit uncomfortable…” Chester and Cale’s faces contorted at the idea of heavy deposits crushing down on their bodies. “But it’d get them in.”
Cale thought about it for a minute.
“Humbert can send word. I just hope it’s enough time to get them all informed and here by tomorrow. Any idea when the delivery will be made?” he asked Mack.
“Not a clue. They say somewhere between lunch and supper. If it’s not here by then the driver is free,” he answered.
“Free?” I asked, confused.
“Yep. I could sure use a slave. The royals think we can get by without ‘em because we can get ‘apprentices.’ But I’ll tell you, yous guys are about the best ones I’ve ever had, and that ain’t sayin’ much,” he mumbled.
Cale wrote out a note and sent it immediately via Humbert.
“He’ll be flying with the bats tonight,” Cilla laughed.
Cilla and I baked bread and vegetable soup for lunch. The guys had helped Mack out in the shop earlier, but they’d already called it quits and fell asleep. The hot day was getting to me. I was running on two or less hours sleep, and the thick humidity only made me want to sleep even more. It reminded me of the southern Georgia summers I’d grown up in. Nothing felt better than a glass of sweet tea and a nap during those dog days. I propped my head on my elbows while leaning on the butcher-block counter. I watched her fold the dough into itself, slowly and rhythmically.
“Is every day like this for you?” I asked.
“You mean cooking and cleaning?”
“Yeah,” I nodded.
“This is what people do here. Not all women but most of ‘em. We’re what makes a household function,” she said without missing a beat.
“Is that all we are, though? Is function over form the role of a woman?” I asked.
This had been a question I’d been struggling with my entire life. My mother never wanted a life outside of her family. She dreamed of having children and being married. Nothing about her wanted more. I, on the other hand, wanted something to shoot for. I didn’t need the stars, per se, but the horizon wouldn’t hurt. I wanted a life full of adventure and excitement, even though it scared me. Even if I wasn’t ever brave enough to step out on the ledge, I still dreamed I could fly. Never, though, in my deepest imagination did I think I’d be in a place like this. I’m in the middle of the craziest adventure of my life, but there is still something missing. My family, my friends, and my home weren’t a part of it. Are our dreams ever really fulfilled if we have to give up something to get them?
“A woman plays many parts. She’s the wife, mother, helper, provider, counselor, and so much more. She is whatever she is made to be, and whatever she’s made not to be. People ain’t cast in a single mold. In fact, there ain’t no mold. So there’s never need to worry of breaking it,” she said and gave me a wink and a smile.
We finished lunch and woke the guys. We sat around the table this time with them and enjoyed our meal. We all rested for the coming events. Mack and Cilla went on about their day performing their chosen roles while I dreamt about my place in Mezzanine, in life, and in the world.
Chapter 22
I slept hard but not restfully. I had a growing fear that something terrible was going to happen when we break into the castle’s gates. It wasn’t a feeling of impending doom, but it was definitely a heavy uneasiness. No matter what I told myself, I couldn’t shake it. Even Cale’s and Chester’s suppo
sed confidence didn’t settle me. In those weak moments, I realized this is why I shied away from everything as a girl. I was simply afraid of where the adventure may lead.
“It is going to be okay,” Chester said the next morning.
I had been gazing off the rooftop, watching the sun’s rays spread its arms across the city. I was so involved in my thoughts that I was completely unaware he had joined me. My eyes met his.
“I’m scared. I feel like something bad is going to happen,” I confessed.
He took my hands in his and kissed them gently.
“I understand. It’s a scary thing, but I want you to know I’m not going to let anything happen to you. Cale and the pack are going to protect you. Can you seriously imagine what a flock of them in beast uniform can do?” He smiled faintly.
I nodded. But on the inside, I still feared the worst.
“Come here,” Chester whispered and pulled me into his arms. I rested my head on his shoulder and allowed my mind a brief peace. I thought about how nice it was to be with him. Nothing about Mezzanine made sense to me but him − us.
The day went on like usual, or at least that’s the way it appeared on the outside. On the inside, we were all secretly a nervous wreck. We had no way of knowing if Humbert had found the pack in time for them to catch the delivery wagon. Humbert hadn’t even come back. This gave Mack and Cilla their own worries. They struggled to keep their minds focused on their everyday tasks, but no one said anything. In fact, we did everything to not talk about it. It was as if mentioning our concerns would make them valid.
By the time midday rolled around, our minds were racing and our hands were idol. We all sat in the shop and waited. There was nothing else to do. Mack gulped ale, Cilla pulled at the strings hanging loose from her skirt, Cale and Chester sat silently looking at the dirt floor with their hands frozen in their pockets, and I stood at the only window looking out at the darkening sky.
“It’s going to storm,” Cilla said faintly. Her eyes focused on the window but never blinked. “I can feel it in my knees,” she continued. We all looked at her, half-surprised that she’d broke the invisible veil of silence.
I watched the clouds billow over the town. Lunchtime came, and they still hadn’t made it. I froze, not knowing what to do or how to react. We needed them. Our whole plan would fail if it weren’t for the help of the pack.
What are we going to do now?
Surrender myself. That’s what I should do. That will get me in. They may lock me up, but Chester and Cale can figure out a way to get me out. I’ll free Madeline, and we’ll take off back into the forest and hide out until everything dies down again.
My mind raced, but before I could fully analyze my thoughts, I watched Cilla lunge across the room at Cale.
“You killed him! Where’s my boy? You people came in here and killed him! We were trying to help you and this is what we get in return!” She grabbed at his throat and tried to choke him. Chester rushed in and helped Cale pull her off. Mack, unmoved by her outburst, took another gulp of ale.
“Contain yourself!” Cale said.
I helped Chester sit her back in her chair, as Cale massaged his throat. She took a breath and went back to tugging at her skirt’s threads.
“Cilla, we don’t know what happened to Humbert, and there’s a good possibility he is completely fine,” I said, trying to calm her, but I could tell whatever she was playing in her mind was louder than my words. I could see the worry on Chester’s face when he looked at me. I’m sure he could see it on my face too. It would only be a matter of time before we were in the royals’ custody, if they decided not to allow us to stay.
We heard a loud thud on the door. Mack peeked through the wooden planks, steadied himself, and answered the knock.
“I have a delivery for Mack Blackman,” a man’s voice said.
“Bring ‘em ‘round back,” Mack answered. We all, except Cilla, rushed to the back of the house. The back door led out into an alleyway.
The rain had caused most everyone in the city indoors, which meant the alley was completely unoccupied, save us. Cale stepped outside first. He immediately recognized the driver and shook his hand. Chester and I let out a sigh of relief. We went to the back of the wagon and unloaded the iron that had been placed on top of the others. It hid them well. I wouldn’t have thought people could have survived under so much weight, and it turns out people couldn’t. They were in wolf form.
There were seven of them in all, including the driver. Cale had them change for us, one by one, so we all were witnesses to their gifting. Mack seemed agitated still, though. It was then I realized that Humbert wasn’t with them. The driver appeared to recognize this.
“We had a little trouble at the gate. Everything is okay, but the guards were a little suspicious. They said they’d been getting a lot of people coming in the gates at the blacksmith’s request, so they took Humbert. You’ll have to go claim him. They promised not to cause him any harm. He was their ‘insurance.’ They explained if the blacksmith didn’t return, they’d set out to find us and alert the royals,” the driver said. Mack nodded and headed down the street.
“Wait. What if it’s a trap?” Cale interjected.
“He’s my son. I’m getting him out of their no-good royal-lovin’ paws, you hear me?” Mack said.
I watched the rain pelt Mack as he hobbled down the street towards Royal Court’s gates as everyone else went inside.
I explained to Cilla where Mack went, what happened with Humbert, and assured her he was okay, but it didn’t help anything. She was still locked in her own thoughts.
I sat next to her, the only way I could think of to comfort her, and watched the muscular, burly men gather around the dining room table and talk about their plans. There were a lot of words like “get them,” “show them,” “what’s coming to them” being said, and I began to feel angry. Do they even care about saving Madeline? Or is this just an excuse for revenge? I sequestered into my own frustration, and by the time Mack and Humbert got back, I was pulling at the strings of my clothing too.
“Oh Humbert!” Cilla cried as they came through the door. He flew to her and rested on her lap. She ran her fingers down the feathers of his back and cried quietly.
“They’re on to us. Whatever yous guys are gonna do, ya better do it fast, before they have too much time to think on it,” Mack said flopping in his chair.
“What did they say?” I asked. Everyone quieted and listened.
“They asked a lot of questions. Questions are never good. People only ask questions when they think there’s something to find out.”
The guys went back to their conversations, more serious this time. I refocused on my fear, just as seriously. I stared out the window and watched the rain dribble off the thatched roof. A sudden loud flash lit up the street. My heart raced. This was only the beginning of the storm.
Chapter 23
The plan was simple. Distract the guards, get inside, save Madeline, and run. It sounded simple anyway. Cale decided since the guards got a little suspicious when the pack rolled in that we should attack before daybreak. There was no sense waiting. We had already staked out the area and learned all we could.
The guys spent the rest of the afternoon strategizing. I sat at the table with them, trying to keep calm and keep up. Their ramblings about overpowering the guards and staying clear of any royals that may be drawn in by the commotion made my head spin.
“What happens if a royal steps in to help control the situation?” I finally asked.
“Hide,” one said.
“Run,” said another.
“Do whatever you’ve got to do to avoid them.”
“It won’t come to that, Roe. Don’t worry. We will be in and out before they are ever alerted,” Chester said calmly and gave my hand a gentle squeeze.
“How can you be so sure?” I asked nervously. “How will we even know where Madeline is exactly?”
“She’ll be in the front garden. Humbert
has already flown over. He roughed us a map. Here,” Cale said and handed it to me. The others had obviously already seen the block of wood that Humbert sloppily carved with his talons. I looked it over carefully, noticing the front garden would begin only steps after entering the castle’s gates. An “X” marked the spot where Madeline’s body was being held. I nodded to Cale and passed the block back to him.
“Everything is going to be okay, Roe. We can do this. We have to.” His voice trailed. That was the first time I’d seen Cale weak. I could see he was scared just like me; only he was better at covering it up with his masculine facade.
Realizing that the strongest man I’d ever known was scared sent my heart into a panic. I started to hyperventilate. I tapped my chest and tried to concentrate on my breathing, but I couldn’t. My heart and mind raced and before I knew it, I saw stars.
“Are you alright?” Chester asked and placed his hand on my clammy arm. I now had everyone’s attention. Their worried eyes pierced me and made me feel weak and insecure. I jumped up from the table.
“I need some air,” I said in a slightly louder voice than necessary and ran to the rooftop deck.
I took several deep breathes in, but the sight of the royal gates only forced me back into my fearful state. I decided to avoid them by looking in the opposite direction. Rain trickled down my face. After several moments, I could breathe again. All that mattered was that I find some inner strength long enough to pull off my task, save Madeline, and figure out how to build a life in this wretched place.
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