Strange Attractors (1985)

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Strange Attractors (1985) Page 31

by Damien Broderick


  conversation did not seem meaningless.

  We arrived among businesslike transportable structures and

  sighed to the ground. As the boots of my softsuit whispered in

  ceramic gravel I visioned a hail.of congealed stone from furnace

  clouds of flash-boiled rock in the final hours of the holocaust. Pixr’s

  helmet light pierced my eyes like a surgeon’s knife.

  He never said, big stooping Fainey-Juveh in his baggy clothes,

  cynical/trusting when it came to the hum an community of which

  he hardly seemed to feel himself part, baby-innocent before such

  devices as sneak computers (or was he just hamm ing it?) — he

  never said, but in his own game he must have been some big jack

  himself. See, here he was single-handed, prying into the buried

  culture of a whole world, at his command a heap of gear: ground-

  cars, transportables, houses, workshops, laboratories, machinery

  of all kinds, rock cutters and borers, specialised probes and analytical gidgets. I bet he knew how to handle the computers of archaeology.

  And we walked down a mine hacked through rock whose frozen

  writhings were imprinted for all time with the death scream of a

  world — into a drop chamber suddenly flooded with brilliance so

  we could cut our helmet lamps and climb onto the disc which

  breathed us down the polished shaft; almost three thousand

  metres, he said. Sesemene had hoped to make his final resting place

  (or place of waiting) secure. Great in audacity, great in caution.

  The archaeologist machines had taken a Trivashti year to sink that

  shaft, for the silver angels of Fomalhauti vengeance had puddled

  the moon’s crust halfway down to the catacombs of their conqueror,

  but then the rock had hardened into an adamantine rind protecting Sesemene better than ever.

  We walked through a short passage bland as a passage in an

  army hospital or in a computer factory, through a cleanlock,

  through a curtain which might have been a curtain of history,

  through centuries, through centuries of centuries into a chamber of

  the empire. Even Limini and Pixr were hushed.

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  W ithinhelmetbubblesI sawthewhitesof theireyes. Fainey-Juveh’s

  metal servants accompanied us to pry and probe what we might

  find, to sound with microseismic pads, to photograph, to holograph, to X-ray, to pierce with monomolecular needles, to contour scan, to smell, to taste, and to plot interferographs between all

  these channels. This was good, good yeah, but their first and finest

  function was to extend tall rods from flat acranial heads like those

  insect fishes of the lightless depths to hang out lamps that lit the

  chamber like day. And lit the rout of poison fogs at the onset

  throughout my being of a great nebula of wonder over . . . well,

  everything — even the shirtbuttons were exotic, subtly anciently

  different, and the buckles, a wrist m irror of silver polished like

  liquid, a tiny filigreed eyebrow comb of gold, the pine-forest-on-a-

  mountainside theory of interior architecture (Syrian Gothic)

  realised in fairytale marble manufactured beneath the protostar

  pressure of Bubutap’s thousand-kilometre-deep ammonia storms,

  a dodecahedral chest of Bast ebony inlaid with mother-of-pearl

  from the seventeenth stomach of a Lagorni cow, a panel cut with

  relief scenes of the progress through a world of monsters of a heroic

  winged mesomorphic child of kings that was only the sliding door

  to a wardrobe that a whole gang of servants — hum an servants —

  could walk inside, the weird archaic tessellations of the floor we

  stood upon, the strange slender non-Cartesian furniture, the silken

  cushions embroidered with unclad women stylised as I had never

  seen, their skin calling to my mind the interiors of seashells . . .

  The minds of these people, yes, called to me across lost and silent

  years, minds that had encompassed pine forests, star-pressure

  technology, multidimensional chair design, minds that had loved

  eagle-winged men and pearlshell women (as well as bat-winged

  men and bearded women), minds that had produced dainty silver

  mirrors, vain golden combs, and produced too the philosophies,

  laws, dogmas, the superstitions, fairytales, nursery rhymes — all

  the uncounted ideas and objects that furnished the grand mansion

  of empire — The minds of men, think! there is no end to it — the

  minds of workers on the dawn mono across Dourisburg chained to

  time but with their dreams of hot sour coffee, the place between a

  woman’s thighs, and monsters; the mind of — say — O rry swimming in wine and nailed out on the white sand by the white stars but accented with knowledges of all the places he’s been, the talking

  he’s done, and the pressure of karinga on lip; the mind of a jum p-

  beacon keeper exiled for years in the black between stars by the

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  anger of his childhood and the religion of his race that says

  automatics are the devil’s work — all these minds living in the

  weird landscapes of themselves composed of that greatest article of

  faith of all time, the outside world, to which belong those creatures

  magnificent in their caprice, other people, and then the more certain regions of scheme and intent, and then the indisputable savage brilliant continents of dream surrounded by the endocrine oceans

  of emotion.

  So here I was, but I forgotten, mind in mind like foot in boot

  with Sesemene (or the creators of that chamber) — marble forests,

  the weight of Bubutap’s methane streams, skewed insect chairs,

  winged heroes and seashell women supplying the harmonics to the

  thrum of the now-jewel that pierced and pierces and was and

  is . . .

  Sesemene Sesemene Sesemene — conqueror, builder, warrior,

  commander, butcher, appointer, condemner, lover, rapist, con-

  ceiver, slayer, artist, posturer, dancer, priest, king . . .

  Hushed, white-eyed, we moved from room to room, chamber to

  chamber, workshop to laboratory to stable to wardrobe of many

  rooms and took in wonder upon wonder in this rockbound city-

  palace-tomb. ‘Ooooo’ and ‘Aaaaa’ and ‘Eeeee’ whooped Limini and

  Pixr. They ran from toy to toy looking, touching, turning, rapt in

  what could be seen, touched, turned in their invisibly gloved

  hands. We adults maybe lost, because we were lost in vision but

  there was no way else to take in all this — we walked through the

  years in the heart of the star-spanning Trivashti empire, we walked

  in the emperor Sesemene’s palace.

  ‘Why all this in a tomb? He could have lived here.’ Once again

  Fainey-Juveh and I were joined in understanding.

  ‘Yes,’ was all he said then.

  A new vision began to grow. O r I felt his presence. Sesemene.

  Not dead these centuries of centuries, only sleeping. Awaiting the

  coming of those with the science to return him to wakeful life. And

  we had the science — not Fainey-Juveh and me, but the worlds to

  which we belonged. Sesemene the Eagle, Bubutap, Priest and Lord

  of Bubutap, High O rderer of Orbits, Chief and Marshal of

  Armies, Trivash Lord of Trivash, King of Lives, Lor
d Provider,

  Vulture of Fomalhaut, King of Kings, Sesemene Emperor . . .

  sleeping there. O ut of this unparalleled mausoleum Sesemene

  would rise again — suddenly I was afire with this knowledge, this

  certainty, for what can be done will be done — look at the cosmos,

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  look at all the weird things they do, all the peoples poking prying

  trying building daring dream ing daring spreading seething

  through the myriad myriad stars. There is only one law — what can

  be done will be done — and this great presence in whose shadow we

  crept from pillared cavern to pillared cavern filled with the treasures of numberless antique worlds would live again.

  Sesemene.

  Fainey-Juveh with his adopted beloved daughters oooooed and

  aaaaaed at the knowledges his machines like trained dogs sniffed

  out for him and brought tail-wagging upon their displays. This

  pearly sphere upon a tall baroque stem was not solid but carried in

  its interior some intricate mechanism — for what? This unknown

  wooden hand implement had originated in the single torrid billion-

  year forest of Orkan when the trees were yet young. And this object

  floating in golden amniotic fluid within glass was the foetus of a

  smaller creature resembling a m an — what? — and why?

  Speaking tautly, dogged by the fawning machines, we came at

  last to the tomb of tombs.

  Unease had arisen in me, I was a child about to commit some

  childish crime for which I must then go in fear of discovery. I

  wanted to turn back, I wanted to get out of this — let the buried

  stay buried. But I could not flee and earn thus the disappointment

  of Fainey-Juveh. And another part of me did not want to.

  O ur feet had brought us to great sword-blue metal doors with

  ornate wheels beside. But we did not need those wheels to open

  them. The archaeologist had not yet entered this inmost sanctuary

  of the undead, but he and his iron dog servants, in preparation for

  the official entry, had barnacled an airlock onto one of the lower

  panels, checked it, flooded sterile air beyond, then left it to await

  the coming of the first men in tens of thousands of silent years. Why

  had he held back? Why not a private glimpse? Was the need of his

  strange and generous nature to share the wonder of his discovery

  more powerful than the summons of that most magnificent autocrat lying within? O r did he fear to enter alone?

  So through the cramped lock we peeled out of our softsuits,

  placing them folded, little more than bubble helmets in a row. By

  something in our m anner Limini and Pixr who had been regaining

  their laughter were quieted. We were in an antechamber full of personal things. Sesemene watched fierce-eyed and multiplied over my shoulders. Indeed there were half a dozen eagle-faced dummies

  bearing ceremonial outfits of metal and gems. Two were sets of

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  dress arm our for a grandly muscled chest, helmets with springing

  double plumes, gauntlets and greaves, and codpieces proportioned

  to house the testicles of a bull, over which should lie (the jutting

  downcurving languid but arrogant platinum sheath graphically

  depicted) a penis of heroic design. Pixr shrieked with laughter,

  pointing, was joined by Limini when Fainey-Juveh and Praliya

  smiled. Then he hurried us on.

  And I stood before —

  There slept within the wondrous living crystal whose love could

  be felt filling the chamber — there slept like a god in amber — slept

  between breath and breath — Ah, that face! Blue, hawkish, hair

  curling black beneath the iron crown, eyeglobes imperial beneath

  closed lids —

  ‘Hail, Sesemene!’ whispered Fainey-Juveh.

  And I, caught up, cried, ‘Hail Bubutap!’

  ‘Hail, Eagle,’ the archaeologist said.

  ‘High O rderer of Orbits, hail!’

  ‘Hail, hail, hail, Trivash Lord of Trivash!’

  ‘King of lives, Lord Provider, hail!’

  ‘Hail, Vulture of Fbmalhaut! Hail, King of Kings! Sesemene,

  Emperor — ’

  ‘Hail, hail, hail!’

  We were shouting, a triple shout of triumph. Praliya was smiling

  uncertainly, and after a moment’s silence Limini giggled, and Pixr,

  their eyes showing white triangles where they slid them sideways at

  each other.

  ‘He will live again, won’t he?’ I said.

  ‘I had not dared dream we would find this,’ breathed Fainey-

  Juveh. ‘Yes, I don’t doubt he will live again.’

  Seeing themselves ignored the two girls stepped back to ferret

  what else of interest the room might hold.

  Fainey-Juveh continued, ‘I hope there will be no difficulties —

  we must ensure that he is treated fittingly, not merely an object of

  study.’

  I said, ‘He will take — seize — his own place among people.’

  Fainey-Juveh nodded, allowing his machines forward. They

  sniffed and probed, pried and sounded, hum ming to themselves.

  Hail, Bubutap. We, the metal dogs of men who come after you,

  greet you.

  And displayed their findings. So that Fainey-Juveh froze. He was

  stooping, white.

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  ‘No — no — ’ head shaking, trying to tell me something. Me

  turning to him, offering support — what? Praliya hanging on his

  arm. ‘No — he will not live again.’

  ‘H o w - ? ’

  ‘There is no brain.’

  ‘No brain?’

  ‘His cranium is empty — full of packaging. No brain.’

  ‘Ah - ’

  ‘Ororon must have destroyed it, his successor, his son. Ororon

  XVII. Mean — petty — little — man!’ Fainey-Juveh’s teeth

  squeaked together. ‘Bastard! Bastard!’

  The bubble of my elation was pricked. Before us lay a husk, a

  mockery, kept hatefully natural by the deceit of the crystal. Of

  course the empire was dead, gone, dust ages since. Here we stood

  deluding ourselves, feeding on fairytales amid a hoard of baubles

  while a real world roiled on outside threatening death and ravishment upon those we cared for. Kolissa — I see your living eyes —

  forgive me, who should be there side by your side facing whatever

  shall come. Kolissa, Kolissa, what am I doing here buried in the

  rock of this ancient rat-hole rubbish-heap death world? (Rubbish-

  heaps are the substance of archaeologists’ work.) I was ashamed,

  sidetracked from seeking Kolissa in whose eyes lives the light of the

  universe to chase an empty pageantry of death. It made no difference that I would not yet be allowed to land on Otzapoc. Why hadn’t I tried to call her? Certainly the call would be allowed

  through, certainly the hospital would allow her to take it. Clearly

  there was no harm in finding out. Then she would have known I

  was on my way, that comfort would have been hers. Was I really

  frightened of finding something had happened to her? I should not

  have denied her comfort for that.

  I was sitting sprawling on the floor before the crystal sarcophagus and the dead dead dead king. Me, second by drawn second, approaching death, second by second dying, second by second, cell


  by cell, today a million more cells dying and rotting in me than

  yesterday, a miracle that the blood and lymph could sweep them up

  and carry them away, but the lymph and the blood also dying by

  degrees until it can no longer sweep out the dead cells and they pile

  up and pile up until the death in my body outweighs the life and the

  death breath goes out of my long-rotten throat, rotten breath,

  breath-rotten, rotten with drink, rotten with empty words spoken

  upon empty air (‘Kolissa, I love you’ — yet I am here safe within the

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  rock and not with you) in empty rooms and empty taverns while

  the universe dies cell by cell and star by star and its peaks of heat

  slide down and fill up the troughs until all is level grey death grey

  death level death . . ,

  Then shrieks of laughter pierced my dull mind. Fainey-Juveh

  was holding Praliya’s hands, they talking quietly. We three looked

  up towards the antechamber where we had left our softsuits. In the

  doorless arch little Pixr faced us, herself arched back with childish

  hips stuck forward, hung like a warhorse with a bejewelled metal

  codpiece clumsily strapped on her, making believe to piss like a boy

  into the plumed helmet that Limini with slight embarrassment and

  much mirth was holding out. ‘Pssssss,’ said Pixr clutching her giant

  platinum phallus, ‘pssss, pssssssss.’ Shrieked with laughter, mouth

  stretched to let it out and teeth and teeth and teeth, eyes slitted,

  head almost falling off backwards. Limini bubbling, watching us a

  little.

  From out of death I doubled up and laughed and wept laughter.

  And Fainey-Juveh and Praliya choking-chuckling, saying ‘Oh no,

  oh no, oh no.’ The anchorage of my diaphragm beneath my ribs

  hurt with the violence of laughing. Until we were gasping and I saw

  Fainey-Juveh’s eyes and he mine and we broke out again, and Pixr

  the pisser pissing and pissing into the king’s ceremonial hat until it

  was full and overflowing and no longer quite so hilarious and we

  laughing with tortured sides at the memory of laughter. Gasping

  and gasping.

  On the way back through the silent magnificent (oh, it was, after

 

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