by Lori Holmes
It was a mistake.
Provoked by the sudden movement, the spider lunged. Quick as a striking snake, it leaped at Banak, fangs as long as a finger extending towards the enemy in its sights.
Galahir reacted before he was conscious of doing so. Even as the spider leaped, he was bringing his arshu to bear. One end of the antler tipped weapon caught the arachnid in mid air, puncturing its body and flinging it into the undergrowth. Its shrieks of surprise and pain filled the forest around them.
Galahir grabbed Banak’s arm and yanked him back to his feet from where he had stumbled over a tree root in his haste to escape the spider. The forest was rustling all around them, agitated by the spider’s continued shrieking.
“Time to go,” he panted. Their luck had run out. Together they ran back along the path they had created, back towards the safety of the Plains.
I’m sorry, Khalvir.
Tonight would not be the night he found his friend but Galahir vowed that he would return. Monster spiders be damned. He would search this forest every night until he discovered what had happened to Khalvir.
* * *
7
Defeat
There were whispers, whispers in the darkness of his mind. He hazed in and out of consciousness, unsure if he was dreaming or awake. He thought he heard the leaves above him move once and a triumphant laugh grazed across his ears. It was not her laugh. This laugh was somehow ancient, the sound of dry leaves crackling.
“I knew it. So, you have come back, boy,” the voice whispered in the shadows of his mind. “The Great Spirit does indeed work in mysterious ways.”
He drifted. The next thing he heard was the whisper of many feet and voices tense with panic.
“Ninmah’s Mercy!” A male voice cried in the far distance.
He tried to rouse himself, knowing instinctively that there was danger, but he could not feel his limbs, could not even open his eyes. The blackness sucked him under completely.
The first thing he was aware of was water flowing over his lips. The sweet, cool flow was a relief against the cracked and parched flesh. Without thought, he began to sip it in, taking one swallow, then another. Strength trickled through his veins and then became a river. And with that strength came awareness.
He somehow knew she was there before his senses were even aware of it. He had been wrong. She had returned and dared to re-enter the pit, even after all he had done. He lashed out defensively with an arm and she danced quickly out of reach. His reactions were slower than normal and he missed, barely managing to brush her shoulder with his finger tips. Pain sliced through his chest at the hasty motion, reminding him of his still healing injuries. The weakness infuriated him.
He rolled up and promptly doubled over, the pain of healing bones and deprivation cutting through him again.
“Careful,” she murmured. “You won’t have fully healed yet.”
Khalvir glared at her as he propped himself into a sitting position. The jabbing pain in his side almost had him doubling up again.
“Juaan.” She had been standing poised by a dangling root but at the sight of his discomfort, she took a step back towards him. Concern welled in her eyes, one hand reached out. “Are-”
You are insane! Shutting out the agony, Khalvir rolled to his feet, he could take no more. His mind was so hazy he no longer knew what was right. “I warned you!”
Ignoring the scream in his soul, he charged at her, fully intent on ending the witch once and for all. He would rather die than be her prisoner.
She stood, watching him come, seemingly unable to move to save herself, a sad irony falling over her face. Then the indigo eyes ignited. He remembered that fire. It was the same fire that had confronted him at the base of the tree as she had defended her friend against him. The power of her fury was staggering.
“Kill me then!” she screamed up at him as he came upon her. “Go on! Be rid of me! Kill me!”
Her eyes burned him, her words singed his fury to ash. Desperately he tried to cling on. He reached out a hand, intent on closing it around her throat and ending her torment. He was so tired. So so tired.
His fingers refused to close. She stepped boldly into his grasp, her soft skin brushing his fingertips, making him shudder. She raised her chin, challenging him to do it.
“Go on,” she hissed. “Free me from my bond, there is no other way. You’ll be doing me a favour.”
His resolve shattered before her strength, he had nothing left with which to fight. He could not do it. He could not…
His knees buckled and he collapsed in a helpless heap at her feet. He had never felt so vulnerable. She had taken everything that he was.
“What spell have you cast on me, she-elf?” His voice cracked traitorously. “Who are you?”
She had not moved so much as a finger as he had fallen. It seemed to take her a moment to find her voice. “I told you. I am Nyri.”
The sound of her name cut at him. “And why do you insist on tormenting me like this?”
He spied a flash of hurt in her eyes at the accusation. “Please,” she implored. “I do not mean to torment you. I only want you to recover.”
He raised his head with an effort, her wide eyes were full of sincerity. He could almost believe her, but he still could not figure out her reasoning, and that filled him with doubt. Everyone had a reason. He must find hers. “You are an elf. I am nothing more than an abomination in your eyes. I know that well enough.”
“You’re wrong!” Her voice burst with unexpected passion. “You are everything to me, Juaan!”
Anger rolled through him as he tried to control himself. “I told you before,” he bit out with as much strength as he could manage. “My name is not Juaan. I do not know who you have mistaken me for. My name is—”
“Khalvir.” She cut him off bitterly. “Yes I know.”
Well, then, he thought to himself, stop it. He glowered at her for a moment longer before his eyes caught sight of something over her shoulder. His heart jumped. The length of root that she must be using to get safely in and out of this prison was dangling invitingly behind her.
He assessed his chances. He was weak, his leg only half healed but he knew he was still stronger than the she-elf - and she was the only thing that stood between him and freedom. He didn’t have to hurt her, just get around her.
Unfortunately, she read the intent in his eyes. “Do not attempt to escape,” she commanded, firmly. “I have a pack of wolves up there who do not take kindly to strangers in their territory. It took all of my skill to prevent them from coming down here to chew your head off. You wouldn’t make it two strides.”
For an instant her eyes grew distant, as if listening to some far away sound that he could not hear. Khalvir was confused until he realised she was calling on her power. A blistering howl ripped through the air above, echoing and multiplying as it bounced off the walls of the pit. The sound of it made the hairs on Khalvir’s arms stand on end. The most menacing sound he knew. The howl of a forest wolf.
He controlled his reaction before she saw. He would not give her the satisfaction of seeing his fear. How dare this tiny girl trifle with him. She had bound his warrior’s instincts and now she had surrounded him with a pack of the blood-thirsty predators who had already killed many of his number. He struggled to control his fury at the reminder, clenching his fists. She was the most dangerous creature he had ever met.
She took a step back from the look on his face. “Are you going to hurt me?” Her voice was small, vulnerable, as if she were the one at his mercy and not the other way around.
The words shivered through him.
Are you going to hurt me?
Never.
The words flashed through his mind in one of those inexplicable bursts of sensation, spoken in a voice that was both unfamiliar and yet somehow central to him. He looked into her eyes and before he was really conscious of his own answer, he whispered: “No. I won’t hurt you.” Helplessness washed through him. “I can’t, it seems. For
the love of Ea, I do not know why.”
He became aware that he was shaking like a defenceless child. Him, a survivor of numerous battles and hardships, trembling before a girl.
A tentative smile was forming over her delicate face. She reached out a hand towards him. His fear spiked at the thought of her touch. Her words alone caused him enough torment. He could not bear to let her touch him as well. He knew instinctively that if she did that, he would fall completely under her spell and be forever lost.
She read the apprehension in his eyes and dropped her hand, a little frown of confusion marring the smooth honey skin between her slanting brows. “Don’t worry,” she murmured haltingly, as if she wasn’t sure as to why she should have to say it. “I won’t hurt you, either.”
Khalvir nevertheless kept his eyes trained upon her as she lowered herself to squat a couple of paces away. He expected her to say more but she lapsed into silence and simply stared at him. Her indigo eyes scrutinised his face, seeming to miss nothing.
His annoyance rose as he fought the urge to squirm. She had won, now here she was, rubbing her victory in his face by studying him like some strange creature she had found beneath a rock. He was accustomed to men being taken aback by his unusual appearance, by his half elf heritage, and he no longer let their reactions bother him. This was somehow more personal.
In the end he could take it no longer. He hadn’t intended to speak again but he needed her to stop looking at him like that. “What?” he snapped.
His harsh question shook her from her deep reverie. “Sorry. I was just thinking, now that we have established we are not going to hurt one another, are you hungry?”
She wasn’t going to give in. He felt the stubbornness he had clung to for days resurface. This was the one thing she hadn’t managed to take from his control. Weak as he was, he was not prepared to give up that last shred of his dignity. “No.” He answered, lifting his chin.
Her eyes were suddenly over-bright with some inexplicable emotion. “Don’t be stubborn.”
You- He was so shocked by her audacity, he could not form his own reply. His mouth opened and closed making him feel like an idiot. “I’m not being stubborn!” he snapped at last. “Why should I trust anything you give me? An elf like you would rejoice in seeing a creature like me dead. It is also in your best interest to kill me.” Why leave an enemy that could hurt you alive?
“And it is in your best interest to kill me,” she countered, smoothly. “You could do so so easily. That first time I came here, you had me pinned to the ground and at your mercy. And again just now. You could have hurt me, killed me, but you didn’t. You let me go. Why?”
She had him. Confusion clouded his mind. Why indeed. She was his enemy, an enemy who held his very life in her hands. She was dangerous. He knew what he needed to do, what he should do to survive. He had been trained to survive. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t faced such a choice before; his enemy’s life or his own. This girl should by now be another painful memory on top of a sea of regrets. And yet here she sat, challenging him once again with those dreadful eyes. Eyes that reached right into his soul and utterly possessed him.
“I. Don’t. Know.” He ground each word from between his teeth in answer to her hated question.
“I do,” she said. “And it is for the same reason I will never hurt you.”
“Will you stop that,” he began hotly, “I am not-”
“Look,” she cut him off again, in complete control. “It doesn’t matter who I might have mistaken you for or who you mistakenly think you are. You either trust me or you die. You are dying. I can feel it. I am offering you survival. The choice is yours.”
Her audacity stunned him again as she neatly overcame his last shred of control. Survival was all. He had to survive. He had to live to protect his clan. He was no use to them dead. He needed to get back to them and he could not do that as weak as he was. If he were stronger, perhaps he would be able to resist her wiles more easily. The cloying air of the forest curled around his mind like smoke.
“I have a surprise for you,” she said suddenly. She reached into the folds of her garments, her face now childlike with excitement.
He recoiled instinctively from whatever she had concealed. He had no idea what to expect. He had to look twice before his swimming eyesight confirmed that she held nothing more threatening than a bunch of berries.
“What?” She rolled her eyes. “Did you think I was going to pull a snake out of there?”
He snorted. “Who knows with your kind.”
“My kind?” Now there was a flash of anger in her eyes; he’d struck a nerve. She was so easy to read in a lot of ways. He felt a thrill of victory at unbalancing her insufferable calm. “The Woves you brought here are worse than any snake!”
“Wove?” That was a new one.
“Yes. Wove,” she snapped fiercely. “Raiders and murderers. By all rights, I should be pulling a snake on you. Now do you want this fruit or not?”
He knew he must not smile. He must not. He struggled to control his features. The fierce posture of her little body as she held forth a bunch of berries was suddenly the most amusing sight he had seen in a long time. Once again, he couldn’t help but admire her courage. “You are a spirited one.”
“Do you want them or not?” There was a definite edge of petulance in her tone now.
Khalvir looked at the shiny red berries in her small, long-fingered hand. His mouth watered. For some reason, this fruit was harder to resist than anything she had offered so far. His last bastion of resistance crumbled. But he still wasn’t about to allow her to get near.
“Alright, have it your way.” He gave in to her. “But first, put them on the ground and move away.”
“Why? I’m not going to bite you.”
“That’s the least of my worries. You have the audacity to call me a murderer? I know what you could do if you touched me.”
“Like what exactly?”
“You tell me, elf-witch.” If she had the power to heal a broken leg overnight, what else was she capable of?
“Elf? Witch?” Her brow pinched together. “That’s rather ungrateful. All I have done is try to help you and heal your wounds.”
He clenched his teeth together. “Even so. Move away.”
“Oh for Ninmah’s sake!” She placed the berries on the ground and backed away.
He watched her move to a safe distance and then stared at the fruit. He could resist no longer. He descended on the berries. He tasted the first tentatively. The sweet juices exploded inside his parched mouth, quenching his terrible thirst and hunger all in one bite. This was surely one of the most delicious things he had ever tasted.
More of those odd, nagging flashes went off in his head but he was too hungry to care. He wolfed down the rest of the berries. They were gone in moments. His tortured belly uncoiled. He looked around for more but that seemed to be it for the red fruit.
The elf murmured something he didn’t quite catch in his distracted state. She was sitting, chewing on one of those now familiar golden fruits, watching him. Only now did he notice how painfully drawn she looked. Eating seemed to be a relief for her, too. She couldn’t possibly be starving as much as him. He felt a shiver of concern for her before he quashed it.
She ate half of the fruit before she laid the remains on the ground in offering. Scooping up the halved nutshell she had thrown down to him days before, she got to her feet and approached the delicate vine that she seemed to have hoped would provide him with water. Before he could tell her how mistaken she had been, she laid her hand on the fleshy stem. He watched in amazement as water began to flow freely from one of the strange funnels protruding from the length of the stem. She filled the nutshell half to the brim and then balanced it carefully on the ground, so as not to spill a drop.
“I need to go now before I’m missed.”
He berated himself for the wave of disappointment her words caused him. There was something else that needed to be answered. A qu
estion that still bothered him deeply. “What is it that you want from me?”
Her breath caught in her throat as she looked back into his eyes. Uncertainty flickered through the indigo depths as she started for the root that was her way out. “Nothing.”
“Nothing? Well, just how long are you planning to keep me down here?”
“I don’t know. We’ll just have to see what the future brings.”
Khalvir tensed his fists. That was no answer. His enemy did not know her own purpose for keeping him? He did not know how much longer he could stand being trapped in this pit. He felt like he was drowning in a nightmare and she was the cause of it all. Frustration bubbled up inside him. “Has anyone ever told you that you are a little monster?”
He was alarmed when she began to laugh and cry at the same time.
“Yes.” She smiled through her tears. “You. Several times.”
Khalvir made his mind up. She was insane.
She pulled herself together. “I must go. Rest,” she ordered softly. “You need to get your strength back. I’ll return with more food but I have to be careful. I cannot let my people become suspicious. They would let the wolves chew your head off.”
So, the rest of her people did not know of his presence. His confusion deepened.
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Are you protecting me from your own?”
She turned then and the look in her eyes made his heart catch in his chest. They were filled with an abiding adoration and… love. No one had ever looked at him in such a way.
“Because… no matter what has happened or who you have become, you are still my Juaan and I will protect you to the end.”
She was up the rope and gone before he could hope to formulate a response. Gone before his heart could return to a normal pace or understand how to feel about anything at all.
8
Acceptance
Days passed as Khalvir sat in the pit and tried not to think. He whistled to the forest and strained to hear any sort of response, waiting for Galahir to respond. His hope that they were searching for him began to wane. Surely they must think him dead by now. The last time Galahir had seen him, he had been running recklessly into the teeth of the enemy.
