by Brenda Joyce
It also seemed that her feelings for him had been tenuous to begin with. That would be perfectly logical. It would explain her about-face. But there was a possibility, a fragile one, one he should not broach, one he could not ignore. "Regina. You cared for me once. You could care for me again."
"No! I was sorely deluded!"
He stiffened. He slipped on an impenetrable mask. That she had once thought him to be some sort of hero had been a delusion and he was well aware of it. He was equally aware that there was a world of difference between them and that with her hating him now, he should do as she asked and give her a divorce and just walk away from her. Instead, he said, "We'll finish this another time."
"No!" she cried. "I want to finish this discussion now! Brett has a copy of those papers. Please sign them!"
He squared his shoulders. "No, Regina."
"No?"
He made his decision, an irrational and foolish one that was hopelessly against the odds. "I'm not going to divorce you."
"No? You have made up your mind?"
He walked to the door, where he paused. "I have made up my mind."
"Dear Lord, why? Why are you doing this?"
"Because James is no longer between us." With that, he let himself out.
Regina slowly descended the wide, graceful marble staircase, her hand on the wrought-iron banister. She gripped the smooth metal much too tightly. Why had Xandria Kingsly come calling on her? She anticipated what could only be a very ugly scene. She should have refused to see her, but for some reason, she could not.
She had not slept a wink the night before. Slade's visit had haunted her, appalling her, infuriating her. He had the utter gall to suggest she could come to care for him again-when he had deserted her, when he had this other woman in his life. It was a new day, but Regina could not stop dwelling on their confrontation of the night before. And now another confrontation loomed before her, one destined to be equally as distressing.
The majordomo, a short, impassive Japanese man, showed Regina to the morning salon, for it was just noon. The room was large and bright. Although the floor was the same tawny marble as the entire ground floor and the stairs, it was covered with a huge, custom-made Chinese rug that was vividly and predominantly gold. The entire room was done in many shades of yellow, so that despite the morning fog, the effect was inordinately cheerful.
Xandria was sitting on a floral-patterned chintz sofa. She wore a beautifully cut rose-red ensemble, the jacket fitted and designed to show off her small waist and full bosom, the skirts flaring just slightly after hinting at her full hips. Even her gloves, which she had removed, were a shade of rose. She smiled and stood up when she saw Regina.
Regina greeted her as politely as possible, given her stiff expression. Careless of whether they had refreshments, she sat on the other end of the sofa, facing her unwanted guest. She clasped her hands tightly in her lap. "This is a surprise, Mrs. Kingsly."
"I do not mean to intrude, Mrs. Delanza," Xandria said earnestly. "But I want so much to make your acquaintance."
Regina could not even begin to guess the other woman's motivation. And she'd had enough of this charade. "Let me be blunt, Mrs. Kingsly," Regina said coldly. "I have no idea why you would call on me. I can only guess you think me an utter fool. I assure you, I am not."
Xandria gaped at her.
Very angry and finally letting it show, Regina said, "I do not care one whit about your relationship with my husband. If Slade has not told you all, then I am happy to do so. I am divorcing him. As soon as that is accomplished, I shall be out of his life forever. And he shall be yours."
"Oh, dear," Xandria said.
Regina stood. It should not matter to her, but she hated the other woman. Jealousy taunted her. She should also be beyond crude speculation, but she wondered helplessly if Slade dared use his mistress as he had used her. The other woman had a certain look about her, a certain walk, a certain style, all tunelessly seductive, and Regina did not doubt it.
"Mrs. Delanza, I fear you have jumped to a terribly wrong conclusion."
"Please." Regina gestured at the door.
Xandria rose gracefully to her feet. She was much taller than Regina. "I am not involved, in any way, with your husband! Except as a dear friend."
"Of course."
"Mrs. Delanza, Slade is like a brother to me! I have known him, and cared for him, fo^ ten long years! Since he was a sulky little rebel! Do you really think we would carry on in such a manner beneath my father's nose?"
Regina was horrified as the woman's full identity began to dawn on her. "Who is your father?"
Again Xandria looked surprised. "Charles Mann."
The floor beneath Regina's feet felt as if it had tilted precariously. She sat down hard on the sofa. "Oh, Lord!"
Xandria sat beside her. "Are you all right?"
Regina could not believe the enormity of her mistake. She was red with mortification. She had been so quick to accuse and condemn. Uncontrollable jealousy had propelled her, not common sense. She was appalled with herself. "Oh! Please forgive me!"
Kindly, Xandria patted her hand. "There is nothing to forgive. Of course you could not know I was Charles's daughter. Stupid Slade! Why didn't he tell you?"
She bit her lip, not daring to look her guest in the eye yet. "He did not know what I was thinking." And she prayed he would never know she had made such a terrible mistake.
"Mrs. Delanza," Xandria said, suddenly smiling and amused, "do not fear. Your secret is safe with me."
Overwrought, close to tears, Regina finally met the other woman's gaze. Xandria winked. "Thank you!" Regina cried.
"I want nothing more than to be your friend," Xandria said simply.
Regina looked at her hands. "I see." She had to face the other woman, who had eased her heart immeasurably, and who was her co-conspirator now. "Mrs. Kingsly, I have erred greatly in my judgment of you. I am sorry," she began.
Xandria shrugged, smiling. "Do not dwell on it. I will let you in on my own secret. Other women do not like me. Especially because I am a widow who has chosen to remain unmarried. They see me as a threat. I can understand how you could make such a mistake." She laughed, the sound husky, genuine. "But it is funny. can^ see that you do not know your husband very "No, I do not."
Xandria gave her a pointed look. "Slade does not dabble in women."
A silence followed.
Regina could not restrain herself. Her aunt had said the exact same thing although in different words. "He does not?"
"No, he does not." Xandria stared at her. "Slade is not only highly moral, he is a prude."
Regina stared.
"You see, I have come here
as Slade's champion."
Regina began to tremble. Slade's eyes, intensely passionate, and his haunting question-Could you come to care for me again?-seemed to threaten her resolve.
Abruptly Regina stiffened. She would not be seduced by his words. As she had pointed out to him, actions were significant, not mere words. She had mistaken his relationship with Xandria Kingsley, but he had deserted her. Had he cared one jot for her, even thinking her to be Elizabeth, he would have never been able to leave her after their wedding night.
Still, Regina raised her gaze to Xandria, when she should have sent the other woman away. But a part of her was thoroughly, breathlessly curious about what she might reveal about Slade. Cautiously, Regina said, "I do not think Slade is a prudish man."
Xandria laughed. "May I call you Regina? May we speak informally?"
Regina nodded, unable to stop herself from recalling their wedding night. There had been no prudery then.
"Slade is like a brother to me. If 1 were not so fond of him, and so concerned for him, I would not bother to impose upon you. I cannot tell you how delighted I was to find that he had finally taken a wife! And then I was shocked when I realized that he had not brought you back to the city with him, and worse, that you were living apart."
"He abandoned me, Mrs. Kingsly," Regina said simply, her color high. She regarded her hands, clasped in her lap.
"He hurt you."
Regina looked up. Her anguish, which just would not fade as easily as the anger had, showed. "Yes."
Xandria leaned forward. "Do you love him?"
Regina hesitated, afraid to inspect her own turbulent emotions. "I… I did. I… I d-don't know."
Xandria took her hands. "Slade is a dear, fine man! The two of you are made for each other! Trust me!"
"You are a stranger, even if a well-intentioned one. Please, do not ask me to trust you. Do not ask me to return to Slade. I cannot risk another broken heart, especially as this one is far from mended yet."
"Damn that Slade," Xandria said with a flash of anger. Then she sighed. "He is not an easy man. I know that as well as you. But could you not try a reconciliation? Slade is worth it, my dear. And if you do not go back to him, sooner or later you will lose him to someone else."
Regina was startled to find that the thought of losing him to another woman was very provocative. She did not like that idea in the least. "I don't know."
"Let me tell you about your husband, being as you do not know him that well. He is a dedicated, loyal man. Terribly dedicated and terribly loyal. He has been offered huge bribes to betray my father by Father's worst enemies, people who would love to see him fall, but he has refused. He has been offered great sums of money just to leave Charles, to work for the competition, but he has refused. Indeed, he works for Charles when he could be working for himself! Slade is selfless. He has no real interest in himself."
Regina could only stare.
Xandria saw her surprise, and her look became determined. "You did not know? He is loyal to me, too. If a man even looks at me the wrong way, well, Slade has dealt a blow or two, I am embarrassed to admit, on my behalf. You are his wife now. Even estranged, I can tell you that you have his complete loyalty." Xandria smiled slightly. "Which is why it's rather amusing that you thought me to be his lover. Slade would never break his marriage vows to you. Never."
Regina was helpless to stop the heady thrill that swept her at the thought of having Slade's fidelity-forever. "But he left me. That is not loyalty."
"I understand that he thought you were James's fiancйe."
Ashamed, Regina nodded. How much had Slade told her?
"Slade is not a man who could marry the woman his brother once loved without being in turmoil over it. Assuming, of course, that he loved you himself."
"He does not love me."
Xandria raised an elegant brow. "That, of course, is something you would know, not I."
Regina met her stare. It was clear that Xandria thought Slade to be in love with her! "You are wrong," she said unsteadily. And there was no more fooling herself now. Her heart beat wildly with hope.
"Slade has been oblivious to all the fine ladies in this city for all the years that I have known him. There has never been a single romance, not one. And," Xandria went on candidly, "he does not keep a mistress. He does not even frequent saloons. He really is a most unusual-and much sought-after-man. But no lady has been able to win even his interest, much less his heart…"
Regina could supply the final missing words: until you. Xandria was determined to make a point. Regina was afraid to let her.
Xandria was barreling on enthusiastically. "And I cannot omit the fact that he is generous. So terribly generous! He is not a wealthy man, you must understand that, for he works for Charles on a salary. He is very frugal, he doesn't spend a penny on himself. He claims his needs are few. Yet what does he do with his savings? He gives most of it away!"
"He does what?"
"He is modest, so he will never tell you this, but the new orphanage in the Mission District was built solely by him. He alone contributed all of the funds necessary for the project. Over the years I have noticed that he seems to have a particular fondness for orphans."
"A fondness for orphans," Regina echoed. And she wanted to cry. Such an inclination was overpoweringly eloquent. Slade obviously identified with these poor homeless orphans.
Regina thought about the businessman she had confronted in his office, about the gentleman the fine ladies of San Francisco hoped to lure. She thought about the man who worked hard and loyally for another, not for himself, who lived frugally, who built orphanages. She did not know her husband. He was a stranger. It was as if Slade led a double life, and perhaps he did. Yet was it really such a surprise? Hadn't she seen his goodness from the start? Her very first impression of him had been that he was a hero and a gentleman, despite the facade he'd chosen to hide behind. Perhaps she knew all she needed to know about him after all.
"Do not give up on Slade," Xandria said softly.
Regina shook her head, until she was able to speak. "I knew, I knew all along, that he was a good man." She wiped her eyes. He was more than a good man, but damn him-he had left her, abandoned her, deserted her, making her life unbearable.
I would have never left you if Yd known.
Regina sucked in her breath. Could her masquerading as Elizabeth have really been so important to him? Did she dare take another chance on the complicated man who was her husband? There would be no in-betweens if she remained his wife. There would be only glorious happiness-or horrendous agony. Could she risk heartbreak again?
If you sit here in your uncle's house you will never know him," Xand
ria said. "If Slade gives you your divorce and you return to England, you will never know Regina looked at her, her resolve crumbling. Or had the disintegration already begun, yesterday in Slade's office, when she had first seen him again? not act in such haste." Xandria squeezed her And come to supper tonight. Come, please. Get "Do hand. to know your husband a little bit better before you decide what it is you will do."
That was only rational. It made perfect sense. But there was nothing rational about the incipient excitement flurrying to life within her breast. Mutely, Regina nodded, accepting Xandria's invitation.
Chapter 21
It was five minutes past seven. Slade tried to look indifferent as he stole a glance at the Tiffany clock, set in heavy eighteen-carat gold, sitting on the white marble mantle. He poured himself a bourbon, his back to the center of the spacious salon where Xandria, Charles, and Edward sat, awaiting the last guest.
Edward and Charles were discussing one of Mayor Phelan's reform proposals, which was aimed at reducing some of the corruption in the city's government. Xandria was unusually quiet. Slade moved to one of the tall double windows, pulling aside the heavy emerald-green drape. He dimly heard the conversation. The afternoon fog had come in with the tide, but it was not thick, it never was, and he could clearly see the quiet street below. It was still light out, but by eight the sun would disappear and the city would be enfolded in twilight's mauve shadows.
