by Tina Saxon
“Well… based on the fact that you’re not telling me to call the cops, I’m thinking you are not in danger. Which is a good thing, because we both know how great of a fighter I am. We’d probably both end up dead.” She giggles and it makes me smile. It’s just like her to try and lighten the mood. My silence is her affirmation that something is definitely wrong. “Seriously, though. Addie, come home. Do you need me to come get you?” She would in a heartbeat. She’s been my rock since I was ten. Someday, I’ll be hers, maybe when fate stops hating me.
I breathe out a long sigh. “No, I’ll be okay. As much as I need you right now, maybe the drive will be good for me to figure out what the hell just happened. It’s complicated. So fucking complicated, Syd. But I’m safe. I’ll tell you everything when I get home.” My emotions have turned off. They’ve been shocked into submission.
“Addie, I love you. Please text me at every stop you make,” she pleads.
“I will. I’ll probably stop for the night and be home tomorrow. Love you, too, Sydney.”
* * *
I collapse on the bed of my hotel room. I’m exhausted. I stopped again in Mt. Vernon, at the same hotel I stayed at five days ago. It’s familiar and as hard as I tried to drive farther today, I just couldn’t. My thoughts are mangled together and no longer make sense. I need a reset button. My thoughts turn to dreams as I drift off to sleep.
I startle awake, dreaming about Jett. One minute we’re making love, the next I’m shooting and killing him. It’s close to reality, but I know I didn’t kill him. It takes a few minutes to calm my raging heartbeat. Regret forges its way in my head, which pisses me off because I was the one being held captive. I shouldn’t feel bad for doing what I had to do to escape.
The room is dark but I can see the sun slicing through the middle of the drapes, its rays illuminating the dust particles floating in the air. I roll over and grab my phone to see what time it is. My stomach growls reminding me its dinnertime. Leaving the hotel sounds tiring. Take out, it is. I open the drapes and the sun bursts through, warming me up. I look down at the traffic. People are just now getting out of work, heading home. Simple life. I long for the simple life.
Twenty minutes later, there’s a knock on the door. Relief that my food is here turns to surprise as I answer my door. My eyes widen as I do a double take.
“Hello, beautiful.” Marco smiles. He’s holding a bag of food. I can smell it from here. It smells delicious. My stomach growls again, telling me to hurry the hell up and let the man in. I’m holding the door half open, still shocked to see him standing there. Remembering I just got out of bed, I run my fingers through my hair, making a quick brush through.
“Marco,” I say, stalling for a moment, “This is… a surprise. How did you know I was here?” I furrow my brow as I tilt my head. After the week I had, my bullshit meter is at capacity.
“Oh. I’m sorry.” He looks to the floor before looking back to me. “The hotel manager and I are friends. After you left on Monday, well… you know guys, we talk.” He sports a Cheshire Cat grin. “He noticed you were staying again so he called to tell me. I was hoping you’d come to my restaurant.” His lips twist. “He texted me when you called down to the front office for takeout. I decided to try my luck and bring you your food instead.” He lifts up the bag in his hand.
Okay, I know there has to be some laws broken in that conversation. This is the last thing I need. I let out a huge sigh. “I’m sorry, Marco. I don’t want to be rude, but I’ve had a week from hell and I won’t be very good company right now.”
“I make a good listener,” he says.
I can’t believe I’m considering letting him in. Marco was very easy to talk to on Monday. Maybe some company will be good for me. Take my mind off of Jett and Travis.
“Okay.” Marco’s eyes shine as he smiles bright. “But no more calling me beautiful. The flirting that happened on Monday won’t happen tonight. If you come in here, it’s just to talk as friends. Also, since you guys talk, I’m sure you know my name already.” I tilt my head as I quirk an eyebrow.
“Addison.” He smirks. “Only friends. I promise.” I open the door wide and he walks into the room. I chuckle and shake my head closing the door. He sets out dinner on the coffee table. It smells divine, but I immediately think about Jett and our Italian dinner. Marco takes a bottle of wine out of a bag, accompanied by two wine glasses and holds them in the air, giving me a questioning look.
Sitting on the couch, I nod. I could drink a few of those. Bottles, that is. He makes me a plate with a little of everything on it. I sit on the floor and scoot to the table. The wine placed in front of me is drained in one gulp.
“That bad, huh?” He glances at me, filling my glass again. “So, it seems it did not go as you planned.”
Rolling my eyes, I say, “That’s the understatement of the year. And yes, it’s that bad.”
I bring a fork full of ziti to my mouth, not wanting to talk about my week. I can’t even tell if the food is good because my thoughts have consumed my entire body. I’m eating purely on autopilot. I eat only enough to make my stomach happy.
“I’ll try not to be offended that you’re not eating my food.” Marco smirks, eyeing my uneaten plate of food.
“I’m sorry. I’m sure the food is wonderful, I’m just not that hungry.” I sigh.
Marco attempts to make small talk, but I can’t bring myself to want to talk. All I’d like to do is go to sleep. Wake up to a new day. It probably won’t be a better day, but it’ll be new.
“Marco, thanks for the food and trying to make me feel better, but I think I need to call it a night,” I say, standing up and throwing away our plates.
“Addison, I’m sorry for just dropping by,” he says, bagging the uneaten food. When he’s done he stands in front of me, lifting my chin so we’re looking into each other’s eyes. “If you ever need anything, let me know. I may be from a small town, but I know lots of people.” He winks before turning to walk out the door.
What?
He knows people? Who says that?
I laugh, thinking I probably just had dinner with the head of the Italian mafia. I laugh even harder at the absurdity of that idea. I’ve had too long of a week. I don’t even bother closing the curtains before passing out on the bed.
Chapter Twenty-four
SYDNEY THROWS HERSELF on my bed, adding a lot of drama flair to her fall. “I can’t believe it’s that time already.”
“We’ve spent almost the entire month together since I got back from Chicago. I can’t believe you’re not pushing me out the door,” I say, plopping down next to her.
She rolls to her side and looks up at me. “Are you sure you’re okay? You know… about the Travis and Jett thing?”
I twist my lips and slowly nod. “I don’t have much of a choice. I’m not going to ever acknowledge that Travis is my father, and Jett… Well, there’s nothing to say about that. It wasn’t ever meant to be.” I shrug. She sits up and hugs me.
“Okay, we’re done being sad. Let’s go party.” Syd jumps up, grabbing my hand and pulling me up with her. Aunt Amy and Uncle Ted are throwing me a NYC or Bust party.
Excitement bubbles through me and I squeal, which surprises even myself because I’m not usually a squealer. After a few rough weeks of dealing with what happened in Chicago, I’ve put it all behind me and now I’m ready to move on. At least that is what I keep telling myself. I left there unscathed, maybe a little brokenhearted and really confused about Travis, but physically I wasn’t hurt. And I’m thankful for that. I do find myself looking over my shoulder a little more often. I can’t do anything about it if Travis finds me, so I’ll deal with it if or when that happens.
Dressed in my favorite denim cutoffs, black New York City tank that I bought last summer, and boots, I walk into my aunt’s backyard. She and Ted moved to a small town between Austin and San Antonio when I went to college. She wanted to still be close to me but away from the big city. They have a beautiful hou
se on a ranch in the country. Ted retired from the force shortly after I came home from the hospital a few months ago, so now they spend their time fixing up their house and land.
Twinkling lights hang across her backyard, the warm breeze gently swaying them. It looks like hundreds of stars dancing to the music of the band. I notice some friends from college two-stepping on a dance floor right in front of the stage.
“Addison!” Amy yells from across the lawn when she sees me, motioning me to come over.
“Amy, the backyard looks amazing. You really didn’t need to do this much,” I say, giving her a hug. I pull back and continue looking around. “I can’t believe how beautiful everything looks. It’s almost magical.”
“Addie, I would do anything for you. You have given me so much.” She reaches out to grasp my arms. Her eyes gloss over.
“Amy, stop,” I say, my voice cracking with emotion. “You’re the one who took in a child and raised her like your own. You gave up so much for me. I can’t…”
“I didn’t give up anything, Addie. Please, don’t ever think that,” she says, shaking her head. “Your mom gave me what I couldn’t have, and I have never regretted taking you in.”
We embrace in another hug; it’s tight and emotional. Focusing on the glittering lights, I make a wish that someday I’ll find a way to show Amy how much I love her and how much I appreciate everything she’s done for me.
“You guys are making me cry! I love you both. You’re like Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups: they always come as a pair and you can’t have just one so you equally love both.” Syd grabs both of us, joining in on our hug. We laugh at her. She’s a nutcase sometimes. “But I thought this wasn’t a goodbye party.”
Amy wipes her tears away and smiles. “It’s not. You girls go have fun.”
Syd grabs my hand and pulls me to the dance floor. The band plays a fast song, so we start to swing dance. We both try and turn at the same time, causing us to die laughing as we untangle ourselves.
“You’re supposed to be the man and lead me,” Syd cries out between laughs. My cheeks hurt from laughing so hard.
“I have to be the man. If you were, you’d chop my head off,” I say trying to catch my breath and massage my cheeks so they stop hurting.
“How about you dance with a real man?” A familiar voice startles me from behind. I whirl around to see Frankie, a huge smile plastered on his face.
“Frankie! You’re here!” I’m surprised to see him. Mainly because, well… he’s Frankie. And how in the world did Amy know how to get in touch with him? He wraps his arms around me, picking me up and swinging me in a circle.
“Your cool aunt invited me. Howard found me and told me about the party. I couldn’t miss my chance to say goodbye to my hot guardian angel,” he says, winking at me.
I can feel the warmth creep up to my cheeks. “Well, I’m glad you came. So, are we gonna dance or what?” I say, grabbing his hands. He smoothly glides me across the dance floor, twirling me all around. Feeling dizzy, I grab onto Frankie’s shoulder to steady myself. “Whoa. Let’s two-step for a bit,” I say, giggling. “Obviously, your leg is doing better.” I catch Ted’s gaze fixated on us as we pass him. I laugh and roll my eyes knowing this is killing him that I’m dancing with Frankie. He’s fully aware who Frankie is, which is why I’m even more surprised Amy was able to invite him.
“Sure is, Add Cat. A little gunshot ain’t gonna keep me down, sweetheart.” I know that Frankie is the one talking, but when he says that, it’s Jett’s voice that I hear. I shake my head, squeezing my eyes shut. Holy shit, I’m not even drinking yet. “Addison?” Frankie stops dancing.
I open my eyes to a concerned Frankie. “Sorry. I think I spun around a little too much. My head is still spinning.” Thankfully the song ends and we walk off the dance floor.
“Well, Add Cat, I’m going to take off. I just wanted to be able to tell you goodbye. I’ll miss seeing you at the DC,” he says, jutting his chin out. I furrow my brows together.
“DC?”
“District courthouse,” he says slowly like I’m supposed to know.
“Oh. Right. I’m so behind on my street lingo.” I laugh. He pulls me in for a quick hug. “Thanks for coming, Frankie. I’m sure I’ll see you again. Just stay out of trouble between now and then,” I say, squeezing his muscled bicep.
“Only for you, Add Cat.” He smiles his panty-dropping smile and winks before turning to walk away. I stand there admiring his backside. He is one gorgeous man. I feel something cold touch my arm, snapping me out of my gaze.
“He’s like Dwayne Johnson hot,” Syd says, fanning herself after handing me a Corona. I slowly nod, bringing the cold drink to my lips. We both watch as he gives my aunt a hug and leaves. “It’s a shame that he’s a bad boy.”
“A damn shame,” I breathe out.
The rest of the night is spent laughing, dancing, and reminiscing with all my friends and family. Syd and I even get up and sing with the band a couple times. There is nothing that could have made this night better. As the night ends, I get emotional telling everyone goodbye. After all I’ve been through in my life, the love that I feel from these people makes me believe that the good in this world far outweighs the bad. I wish my mom was here with me, but I know that she’s watching over me with a smile.
“She’d be so proud of you,” Amy says, reading my mind as she wraps her arms around my waist. We both stare up at the twinkling stars in the pitch-black sky.
“She’d be proud of you, too,” I say, giving her a kiss on the cheek.
“When do y’all leave?”
“Monday morning.” Syd is helping me move my stuff to New York in Jeff’s SUV, and then he’s flying there in a week to drive back with her.
“I have to give you something so don’t let me forget tomorrow before you leave,” she says quietly still staring at the stars.
“Amy…” I hesitate. “Is everything okay?”
“Oh, yes, sweetie. I didn’t mean to worry you. It’s nothing bad.” She reassures me, slightly brushing my cheek with her hand. “Go, finish saying your goodbyes. I need to clean up a little.”
* * *
“Mmm… I’m going to miss your cooking,” I mumble with biscuits and gravy in my mouth. Amy laughs. I can’t cook worth a darn. I seriously burn water. Amy tried to teach me numerous times but finally gave up.
Thank goodness Syd is a great cook. Although, I’m not quite sure what I’m going to do in New York. I’ve never lived without a personal chef.
Amy takes a seat at the table, watching me eat. “I’m really going to miss you, Addie,” she says, smiling.
“Me, too. But this gives you a reason to come to New York City,” I say, grabbing her hand. “There is so much I want you to see there so don’t wait too long.”
“I won’t, sweetie. I’d love to come out. Maybe for Christmas? I’d love to see New York City then. Or Thanksgiving… for the Macy’s parade. Or New Year’s Eve,” she says excitedly.
“Probably not all in one year. You’d hate New York by then, but we’ll do them all.”
I finish eating my food and push off the table to stand up. Amy grabs my hand, stopping me. “Wait, you sit. I need to give you something. I’ll be right back.” She picks up my plate and drops it off in the sink on her way out of the kitchen. I think back to the day I thought she was giving me a car. I shake my head.
Boy, did I have that wrong.
The scraping of the chair pulls me from my thoughts as Amy sits down across from me. She’s smiling a genuine smile. I breathe a sigh of relief; my memory made me wonder if this was bad news again.
Amy fidgets with a manila envelope that she has laid on the table. I sense that she’s nervous but whatever it is it’s not bad. I tilt my head, lifting an eyebrow, waiting for her to start.
“Addie. Don’t be mad.” She laughs, taking a pause. She flicks up the corner of the envelope. The noise distracts me so I look from her hands to her face, back to her hands. Waiting.
<
br /> “Spit it out, Amy,” I say, tapping my hand on the table.
“Okay, okay. When your mom died, her insurance policy left you a trust.” I nod, already knowing this because I received it on my eighteenth birthday. “You only received the first part.”
“I don’t understand.” I furrow my brows.
She slides me the envelope. Now it’s my turn to toy with the envelope. I look at the envelope and then to Amy. I don’t know what I’m waiting for, but I’m nervous as hell. I close my eyes and take a deep breath.
When I was eighteen I received two hundred thousand dollars, which I still have over half that left. That is what I’m using to find a place in New York City. I also received a letter from my mom that she had written to me when she set up the trust. I had to stop taking it out and reading it so often because the paper was starting to thin and rip at the folds. After that, I laminated it to make sure it wouldn’t get ruined. The letter was the most important thing, much more than the money.
My breathing picks up. “Is there a letter?” My voice cracks as anticipation takes over my senses.
“Open it, sweetie,” she whispers.
I’m afraid.
I’m afraid there won’t be a letter.
I’m afraid there is.
This might be my last lifeline to my mother. I drop my head on the envelope still laying on the table, stretching out my arms and setting my palms down flat on the table. I slightly tap the table, trying to calm myself.
This is ridiculous, Addison. Open the damn envelope.
After a few minutes, I sit up straight and pick up the envelope. Slowly, I pull together the gold brads and slip open the flap. I hear the locusts buzzing outside the window. I think they’re all chanting for me to hurry the hell up. I look up to my aunt, her mouth curving into a smile. I pull out the contents of the envelope.
My heartbeat races as I look through the papers. I’m looking for one thing and one thing only. Tears well up as I see what I’m looking for. A small envelope with my name written on the outside. In her writing.
