by A. G. Khaliq
“Lazarus hasn’t come home today. Why would he be out so late if he worked in an office?” I murmured to myself, pacing around my bedroom. “Maybe he’s gone to see a friend. Maybe I’m overreacting.”
I rubbed my chin in thought, furrowing my eyebrows.
“But he hasn’t even texted or called me, telling me not to wait up for him. He hasn’t replied to any of my messages.” I broke off, shaking my head. “I think I should go and look for him.”
I stared at my wardrobe, and a small smile formed on my lips, a blush creeping to my cheeks.
“I should dress sexy and surprise him,” I murmured to myself, and giggled with anticipation.
I walked over to my wardrobe, and slid into a tight bodycon sparkly red mini-dress, paired with red high heels. I plaited my hair and put on some red lipgloss. I hoped Lazarus would like my look and my outfit.
And then I turned on my heel, and headed out of Lazarus’s penthouse.
I knew I had nothing to fear with my old boss anymore if I went out, because I now had Lazarus’s protection. He said he would protect me with his dying breath…
So I knew I had nothing to worry about.
raven
I made my way down the motorway in one of Lazarus’s cars, driving at a high speed, accelerating further with every passing second.
“This traffic is a nightmare,” I muttered.
“Why have you dragged me into this again?” Sophia replied beside me.
“Well, I’m following Lazarus,” I remarked, rolling my eyes.
Sophia sighed heavily, appearing agitated with me, like this was the worst idea in the world.
“Just concentrate on the road!” she snapped.
I rolled my eyes again as I continued to drive. I’d managed to trace Lazarus’s location through my phone, because he’d left the app on. I hoped he was all right, and he wasn’t in any trouble. I was worried about him, so I thought it would only be right to check on him. I was sure he wouldn’t mind.
The night was pitch black, the stars dimly lighting the sky. I’d reached the location my phone told me Lazarus was currently. I parked outside a few streets down, so my car wouldn’t be in plain sight, and I wouldn’t get caught.
Me and Sophia cautiously made our way to the house. It had big oak trees, and was beautifully refurbished. It was a huge mansion, and I found it hard to believe my eyes.
I cautiously opened the gate and made my way down the driveway, Sophia following closely behind me. Suddenly, I heard voices in the back garden.
It sounded like Lazarus’s voice, in a heated conversation with a few other men.
I tiptoed to the garden, making sure not to make a sound. Me and Sophia hid behind a bin, crouching downwards so that we wouldn’t bait ourselves.
I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, as I watched the scene play out in front of me. I couldn’t believe my eyes.
Lazarus was wearing a cop outfit, and he was standing between two men. One of the men was dark-skinned with dreadlocks, and was wearing tracksuit bottoms. The other was white, his blond hair tied in a manbun, with a rugged beard, and scars all over his face and body. His white t-shirt was soaked with blood, and I had no idea why.
“Have you disposed of the body?” Lazarus hissed.
“Yes, Boss,” said the blond man, dusting himself off.
“Okay, good,” Lazarus confirmed. “Both of you need to get out of here as soon as possible. I’ll deal with the rest, and clean up your mess. Make sure you burn that t-shirt, and anything else that connects you to the murder. I’ll handle things down at the police station.”
The men nodded, as if they were his lapdogs and did everything Lazarus told them to do.
“He’s a police officer?” I whispered to myself, even more confused than I had been earlier. “Why would he lie to me and tell me that he works in an office?”
I found this whole situation so strange, I couldn’t make sense of any of it. Those men had taken care of a body, and instead of arresting them, Lazarus was telling them he would take care of things from his side?
I could feel my heart pound against my chest as I began sweating profusely. The full extent of what was happening suddenly hit me from a million different directions at once, like daggers straight to my heart.
But I didn’t want to believe what my mind was telling me. I wanted to carry on following him to put my mind at rest, because this whole thing could just be a huge misunderstanding on my part. I wanted to think the best of Lazarus, not believe he was capable of doing something so sordid, not after everything he had done for me…
There must have been a logical explanation behind all of this. Maybe he was an undercover cop, so he wasn’t allowed to tell me his job as part of his role…?
“We better get out of here before he sees us,” Sophia hissed in my ear, causing me to jolt out of my thoughts.
I nodded timidly, feeling my throat go dry, hardly able to compose a sentence because it was like I’d suddenly forgotten how to speak.
Before I knew it, Lazarus had turned around and he was making his way inside the mansion, while the other two men turned in the opposite direction, headed to their car. I grabbed hold of Sophia, pushing her closer to the bin so we were hidden properly as the men exited the back garden. I blew a sigh of relief as I heard the revving of the engine, and watched them drive away. We hadn’t been made.
“Let’s get out of here, please,” Sophia said shakily. “I’m scared, Raven.”
“Not yet,” I murmured, because I was in a state of confusion, and I needed answers. I got to my feet, helping her up too. I needed to follow Lazarus inside of the mansion to see what he was doing. I needed to put my mind at ease. I couldn’t just go home with Sophia and act like nothing had happened. Everything I’d seen would plague my thoughts all night long and straight into the day.
Lazarus had made his way to the basement of the mansion, and he was in a heated conversation with two new men. One looked Polish, and the other one looked Russian. They were smoking cigarettes, taking in Lazarus’s words to the last detail.
Me and Sophia hid behind a wall so that could listen to their conversation.
“Is our shipment ready to collect yet?” Lazarus asked, folding his arms.
“We’ve been told it’s arriving tomorrow, Boss,” said the Russian, shrugging.
“When and where?” Lazarus snarled.
“Four in the afternoon, at the docks,” the Polish man stated.
Lazarus nodded in approval. “Now we’ve got our shipments back on track, we’re finally back in the game. The Manzellas ruling the fucking streets. I’m gonna be the biggest goddamn drug dealer in London. The Surenos won’t know what hit them. We’re taking over their territory, along with the Mexican motherfuckers, and the Italians.” Lazarus chuckled. “Our cartel will rule the fucking country…because I’m the kingpin. Everybody will fear me.”
“You’re gonna rule, Boss,” the Polish man exclaimed. “We’re gonna move so much product, and if anyone tries to cross us it means war.”
I could feel the colour drain right out of my face as I went stone-white in shock, unable to believe my ears.
The Manzellas…
The two words that came out of Lazarus’s mouth replayed themselves over and over, like a form of motherfucking torture.
I couldn’t breathe.
I couldn’t fucking breathe.
Lazarus was the kingpin of the Mafia whose members assaulted me and took my sister away from me?
I didn’t want to believe what I was hearing…but I’d heard it come straight from his mouth. I couldn’t turn a blind eye to that fact and act like nothing had happened.
This must have meant he was a dirty cop…this whole cop façade was just a front to cover up his tracks.
I couldn’t believe he’d been hiding something so big from me this whole time. I couldn’t believe he lied to me. I thought he loved me.
Why did everyone I got close to always have to break my heart?
I thought he was different. He was one of them this whole time.
I could never trust anybody again…
I found tears welling in my eyes, and they fell uncontrollably, I was unable to hold them back. I broke into sobs, my whole body shaking into a frenzy. I couldn’t comprehend this situation. I prayed it was just a nightmare, and I would wake up…
I fucking prayed…
“Raven, we need to get out of here before they see us!” Sophia whispered desperately. “Come on, this isn’t the time or the place to start crying!”
A sudden deep voice caused me to jolt upwards, and my heart leapt to my throat. I watched my life flash before my eyes.
“Guys, did you hear that sound?” came Lazarus’s voice.
“Yeah, sounded like someone crying,” the Polish man remarked.
We’d been made.
I was suddenly terrified. After everything I’d just learnt about Lazarus, I had no idea what he was capable of, or what he would do. He’d gone from a sweet office man to a mafia kingpin within seconds…
My heart pounded against my chest as my tear-filled eyes slowly made their way upwards from the ground, with Sophia shivering behind me, and I saw Lazarus looming over me, his shadow dominating the room.
Bloody murder written all over his face.
“What the fuck are you two doing here?” Lazarus sneered, his voice dropping to barely above a whisper.
Echoing across the room.
raven
“Raven got worried about you because it was so late and you still hadn’t come home…” Sophia trembled, doing her best to explain herself on my behalf, and rectify the situation.
But I knew it was no use.
Nothing was going to save me from facing the music.
“So you fucking followed me, you psychotic bitch?” Lazarus snarled, his eyes burning into mine, as if he were staring right into my soul.
His eyes were filled with darkness, appearing hollow, void, completely empty of emotion.
He no longer stared at me like I was a work of art. Like I was the most beautiful woman in the world. Like he admired me and respected me. The way he would worship my body, and make me feel like a goddess whenever we slept together, despite all of my scars and marks…
There was no love left.
He looked so angry, it looked like he wanted to kill.
And it terrified me.
It fucking terrified me.
“Dressed like that at this time of night, with all the creepy men about?” Lazarus snarled, cocking his head to the side. Disgust was written all over his face as he looked at my bare skin. “Giving them ideas?”
“No, I dressed like this for you!” I pleaded, sobbing. “I wanted to look nice to see you!”
Lazarus rolled his eyes, not caring what I had to say. I didn’t know what I could say or do to fix this.
There was no fixing this…
“It’s not okay to fucking follow me around and interfere in my private business!” Lazarus barked in a low voice that caused my skin to burn as I quivered underneath his gaze. “I barely met you a few weeks ago, and this is how you behave! Now you’ve heard everything and you’re a goddamn liability!” He broke off, seething, rattling his fists angrily.
“Why are you shouting at me like I’m in the wrong?” I snapped back. “You run the drug cartel whose members harassed me all those years ago! Who took my sister away from me! I poured my heart out to you, and you acted oblivious the whole time. The whole time, you were part of the criminal organization…”
“Go take the sorry act somewhere else, you’re just a pathetic little stripper,” Lazarus snarled, not caring whether he was hurting my feelings. Not caring about the pain and anguish he put me in making me relive my torture from all those years ago. He knew just how to push my buttons, just how to make me feel like I was worth nothing. Bringing my background and my career into the situation, even though he knew I didn’t have a choice when I was living that way… “When you wear clothes like that and dance in front of old men, how can you not expect them to do those things to you?”
I jolted backwards, mortified. I felt humiliated, and now, I couldn’t stop the tears from falling. I may have been a stripper, but there was no justification for rape. Rape was never the victim’s fault, I knew that, and I had to keep reminding myself of that no matter what…
“You just crossed the line, Lazarus,” I croaked. “A man’s dirty mind has nothing to do with what a girl wears.”
Lazarus rolled his eyes, as if he really couldn’t care less about my opinion. And that stung me more than I could ever imagine. It felt like somebody had torn my heart out of my chest, and was hammering at it with a chainsaw.
I loved this man…
It had only been a few weeks, but I genuinely loved him…
“Raven, you’re a stripper?” Sophia spat bitterly, jolting me out of my thoughts. I turned around to face her, and this only triggered my tears even more. I could see the hurt written all over her face, because she hadn’t known about what I did to make money. I felt even guiltier that I hadn’t told the truth, and she had to hear it from somebody else before she heard it from me. “You told me you work in a pub! How could you lie to your own sister?”
“I’m sorry, babe…” I breathed, my chest heaving. “I didn’t want you to know, because I wanted to protect you. You’re too innocent for my world.”
Sophia opened her mouth to speak, but then closed it, as if she were trying to stop herself from saying something she would regret. She shook her head, taking it into her hands, and rocking herself back and forth.
She looked back up at me, her eyes welling with tears. “I understand, but the fact you couldn’t trust me enough to tell me shows what I really mean to you,” she whispered shakily.
“Sophia, don’t say that…” I pleaded, not wanting to fall out with my sister. She was all I had. I couldn’t bear hurting her. I couldn’t bear the fact she was upset and angry with me…
Before I could justify myself, Sophia turned on her heel, making her way out of the basement, her eyes fixated on the floor the whole time.
Lazarus let out a low laugh beside me, the corners of his mouth forming into a smirk as he watched the scene play out. He was amused. Amused by my pain, the fucking bastard…
“You manage to make everyone leave you, don’t you?” he sneered.
I balled my hands into fists, hardly able to hide my rage. I was so angry. So, so fucking angry.
“Why are you behaving like this?” I shouted. “I didn’t do anything wrong. I just wanted to check up on you, and you’re talking to me like I’m some sort of animal…” I trailed off as tears threatened to spill down my cheeks again. My heart felt like it was about to explode.
Just when I thought my life was getting better, leaving the strip club, living with a man who took care of me, provided for me…
It felt like everything was slipping through my hands like water.
Like it had just been a dream, and none of it had actually happened.
My past yet again coming back to bite me in the ass.
“Raven, I can’t be arsed with this shit right now,” Lazarus spat, rolling his eyes agitatedly. “I’ve got stuff on my fucking plate that I need to take care of. More important than your fucking emotional episodes. Grow a fucking backbone and go home. We’ll talk about this later.”
I balled my hands into fists again as Lazarus continued to invalidate my emotions. Dismissing me like I meant nothing to him.
“You’ve got another thing coming if you think I’m gonna talk to you after the way you just spoke to me,” I snapped back.
Before he had the chance to respond, I turned on my heel, and began trudging out of the basement, my surroundings blurred around me as I struggled to stay focused on the here and now.
Not wanting to believe that Lazarus was a bad man.
Not wanting my fairytale to end so abruptly.
But deep down…I knew it was over.
; And now, I didn’t know what I was going to do.
lazarus
I sighed to myself as I watched Raven walk away. She’d wasted enough of my damn time with her temper tantrum, when I could have been speaking to my men about how we were going to grow and make money. I was pissed off to say the fucking least. The woman knew how to get on my last fucking nerve.
“Women are something else, man, Jesus Christ.” Luis laughed from beside me, amused.
The last thing I needed was my men fucking jesting me.
“Where did you even find such a psychopath, Boss?” said Tariq, joining in on the laughter. “Weird, you never told us you have a girlfriend.”
I rolled my eyes angrily, shaking my head. Feeling my anger boil to the point my head was searing in pain from my fucking temper.
“That’s because she’s not my girlfriend,” I snarled, wanting to put an end to this mockery. After the way Raven had just humiliated me in front of my men…she was going to have to pay.
Tariq and Luis’s eyes pierced mine with intrigue and curiosity, wanting to know who the hell Raven was if she wasn’t my girlfriend, even though she believed herself to be.
“I went to a strip club one night because I hadn’t been laid in ages,” I muttered. “I saw her up on the podium performing. She was sexy, I gotta admit. She caught my eye. I was having drinks, and I saw her boss bothering her and forcing her to dance with some creep.
“Later, I saw her running out of the bar. I followed her and told her I’d help her out. The dumb bitch believed everything, she was such an easy lay. It’s nice knowing that she’s not sleeping with other guys, while I fuck about all I want. I have a woman who feeds off my attention, a woman who’s willing to be my fucking lapdog. Hanging off my every word.” I shrugged my shoulders.
“It’s not her that’s making me keep her around. It’s the fact that I feed off of her weakness. I feed off her vulnerability. I know I can treat her however I want, and she won’t leave. Because she knows that if she leaves me, she’s got nothing going for herself. If she leaves me, she’s back living on the bare minimum, dancing on a pole for disgusting men so she can get by.” I folded my arms.
