“God I love you,” I say and then I feel my cheeks heat when everyone stops talking to look at me and I realise I’ve said that out loud. But I only have eyes for Saul. His attention has turned to me and he steps over to where I’m sitting and lifts me up, he then sits down and places me in his lap.
“I love you too, babe,” he tells me, his eyes piercing mine and a balm coats my heart, being here with them all. I look around the room again at everyone and they’re all smiling at me.
“I love you all. My life would be empty without every single one of you in it.” I feel the tears shimmering in my eyes and I blink releasing one, which Saul mops up with his finger. He pulls my head into his neck and I breathe him in, feeling complete.
Some people never have this. Never have people that love them with such a fierceness that it’s almost crippling. I close my eyes and burn this moment into my brain.
Never forget what you have. My new mantra.
I don’t need to be brave anymore because I have a family around me that will always be there to fight for me and to fight with me, and they are all the strength I need.
“So run me through this shit now we’re away from the girls,” Con asks while doing sit-ups. Dane is skipping like the Energizer Bunny and I was doing chin ups, but at Con’s question I jump down to relay what the police said when they came over yesterday.
“They arrested her,” I tell him. Con stops mid sit-up slowly bringing his arms down then props himself up with his palms.
“So the tape was enough?”
“I don’t know, apparently they had some other info. Although I imagine the tape must be intent to harm or some shit like that, but they got a warrant. Apparently, they arrested her then went through all her crap. They found a fuck-ton of stuff that proved she was a prostitute too, and that she was linked into some sex trafficking shit. I don’t know the details, they didn’t tell us. All they said was that she had been arrested and it was unlikely that she would get bail. Dane found out the rest and he hasn’t told me how. Anyway, as long as she stays the fuck away from Soph I’m good. Hopefully, she rots away the rest of her pitiful life in a prison cell,” Con nods in agreement at my words.
“Patrick?” he speaks that one word, knowing there’s no mistaking what he’s really asking.
I shrug my shoulders and shake my head. Linking both my hands behind my head and looking up at the ceiling, I tell him, “They can’t find the fucker. He’s gone to ground or some motherfucking shit. All it means to me is that he’s still out there, and I don’t know when or how he’s going to try and hurt Soph next. What I do know is that I can’t stop her having a life or he’s already won. If this was only a few weeks then yeah, I would tell her to keep her arse inside, but it’s not. It’s gone on far too fucking long, and I know she can’t be finding it as easy as she makes out. It’s like there’s this bomb ticking away under our feet and I don’t know what to do anymore.” I look back to Con when nobody says anything and realise Dane has stopped skipping now too and is instead staring at me. His jaw is locked and his eyes have gone cold.
“We need to find this fucker,” Dane says in a growl and both Con and I look to him and nod.
“But we have to do Cornwall first,” I say and now it’s their turn to nod at me.
“Are you ready for it?” Con asks me.
“Fuck! I don’t know. I guess I’ll have to be seeing as we’re going on Thursday night. You still alright to come with? You know, with work?” I ask Con.
“Pea would have my balls if we didn’t go. She’s been looking forward to this since she came out of the hospital. Well, even before that really and after what happened to Soph, she’s started her mothering eleven weeks early,” Con says dragging his hand down his face.
“I’m sorry, bro, you don’t need this shit on top of worrying about your pregnant fiancée,” I tell him what he already knows and he smiles.
“I’ll always worry when it comes to, Pea. I think after all these years it’s inbuilt. I’m worried about Soph too. I want this fucker caught before he does anything else.”
We all remain silent at Con’s words, knowing only too well what he’s saying and what we’re all quietly thinking and worrying about.
“It’s such a lovely day,” Pea comments. Pea, Eric and me are laying in Dane’s back garden on a blanket looking up at the sky. We’re being childish and trying to decide what the clouds look like. When Pea and I were eight and used to do this, the guessing was all elephants and cars…not so much now.
“Oooh look, over there to the right a bit,” Eric says pointing. “That’s a cock with a dolphin piercing.”
I snort and chuckle then go straight into a full on belly laugh when Pea says, “What’s a Dolphin piercing.”
To which Eric replies, “Oh sweetie, they don’t let you out much do they?”
Pea says nothing and about five minutes later when I finally sit up using my elbows for leverage to look over at her, I notice her eyes are closed and she’s snoring softly.
“Fuck me! Has she got that sleeping disease?” Eric asks now sitting up and pushing his sunglasses up onto his head.
“Narcolepsy?” I ask and he nods. “No, you numpty. She’s always been the kind of person who can fall asleep quickly, but since she’s got pregnant, she’s tired all the time apparently,” I explain, but Eric just wrinkles his nose.
“Just another reason not to get pregnant,” he tells me.
“Not something you have to worry about, Eric,” I state with a smile.
“Not me, Missy, but you might go through…this,” he says it again with such disdain and curls his lip up at Pea like she might infect him at any moment. It would make me laugh if it didn’t bring so much hurt and resentment to the surface.
“Probably not going to be an issue for me,” I say to him pointing to my abdomen. “Only one tube remember?” I refresh his memory and he looks at me with pity in his eyes which hits me hard.
“What did Saul say when you told him?”
I look back up at the sky and smile. “He said as long as he’s got me he can roll with anything.”
“Knew I liked that hunk of a man,” Eric mutters and we both lay back down to catch the last rays of the sun.
“I’m glad that’s over,” I whisper to Eric.
“Yeah me too, Missy. After that we definitely need to go out tonight,” he replies as he hands me my clothes. I knew I was taking a chance by attending this booking when it came direct rather than going through my agent. But as I haven’t been able to get hold of Sue for weeks and instead have had to put up with her assistant Carlie, I haven’t been getting much work at all.
I need the money. At least that’s what I've been telling myself to get through it. The place was set up like a typical shoot, and at first I was happy. I met the owner of the company and found out a little more about everything. The advert was for a new hotel, he explained that he had set this new venture up recently. He had other businesses but considering the market at present, he thought this new idea would work fantastically for him.
The hotel was five star inside and out. But when you went into the rooms, well, think, ‘Red Room of Pain’ from Fifty Shades of Grey and you’ll understand what was hidden behind the façade. That part didn’t bother me. In fact, when entering the room they were using for the advert, I kind of wished I was here with Saul, and without the other ten people that were fussing about like worker ants.
The problem for me was when I realised the owner wanted his son to be in the shoot with me, on the bed, or tied up, but always in compromising situations. His son was creepy, and even before I was made aware that he was going to be in the photos, he kept coming onto me and wouldn’t take no for an answer. At one point I thought I was going to have to knee him in the balls to get him to leave me alone. He’s obviously someone who’s used to getting what he wants. So when it was explained that I had to do the shoot with him, I wasn’t over the moon. I could see the delight on his face though and I think that’s
the part that actually scared me.
The first pose the client wanted was of me tied up. So my hands were bound behind my back and I had to kneel on the bed with a gag and blindfold on. That was okay until he knelt behind me. I could feel his erection poking me in my back. He leant down next to my ear and while the camera snapped away, he whispered, “I personally picked you to do this shoot with me. I’ve seen your photos and wanted to get you to myself for ages. Maybe after this circus, I could take you somewhere quiet.” And right at that moment, even with a gag in my mouth, I threw up a little bit.
When the gag and other effects were removed, and before they trussed me up for the next ‘look,’ I pulled Eric and the photographer, Sam, to one side. Luckily I knew Sam from other photoshoots. I mentioned that I felt uncomfortable around Pervy Pete, or whatever his name was, and I told them what he had said to me both before and during the shoot.
Sam made sure every photo after that was without us touching. Opting instead, to have stills taken where I was tied up on the bed, and creepo was standing beside the bed holding a rope or a whip. The client argued slightly on behalf of his son, but Sam stood firm and so he gave in.
Now it's three hours later and I’m just glad that Saul wasn’t here to witness how this went down because I think he would have gone all Caveman on me. I’m glad I’m soon to be heading home, as I’m exhausted.
“So how about we get out of here?” I hear from behind me and I jump out of my skin. I’m still standing in my bra and jeans, and although I was wearing less for the shoot, this is somehow different. It’s a violation of my privacy.
“Do you mind?” I ask spinning around and holding my top across my chest trying to keep my dignity.
“Not really, sexy legs,” he says leering at me.
I cringe internally. “Look, you might be the boss' son, but I have a boyfriend and he’s less boy and more man if you know what I mean?” I tell him, pissed off and not trying to be polite anymore.
“Whoa!” he says looking over my shoulder at who I assume is Eric. Who is probably shooting daggers at him. “I just thought we could get to know each other somewhere more private,” he tells me with a smirk.
I curl my lip. “I’m pretty sure I’ve told you politely at least eight times today that I’m not interested. Geez, I said earlier that I had a boyfriend,” I complain.
“Sorry, I just thought you were playing hard to get,” he replies still smirking.
“Yeah, I’m sure that’s what Kathy Bates’ character in Misery said as well,” I snap.
“Okay, I get the point. I’ll be out front if you change your mind sweet thing,” he says walking out. My shoulders sag and I quickly pull my top on feeling exposed.
“Ugh! I think I threw up watching that,” Eric screeches from behind me.
“Been there, done that,” I moan.
“Come on, let’s get out of here. I need a night out more than ever now,” he says grabbing my hand and walking me to the waiting car. I just have time to shout a quick ‘bye’ to Sam as I’m dragged away.
Fuuuck! I adjust myself. Watching Soph dance makes me harder quicker than any bitch in a porno ever could. When she asked about going out tonight, my initial reaction was to say no, actually to shout, ‘Hell no,’ and to lock her in the bedroom and stand guard. I know that makes me sound like an overprotective arsehole, but I’ve been so worried about something happening to her. So worried about losing her, that for a while, I forgot about the fact that by suffocating her I could lose her anyway.
Some men would say that they’d take the risk of living their lives without their person just to know she’s safe. I guess I’m selfish. I haven’t just opened my heart to then do something that will push her away. I need her. She is the air that fills my lungs, the blood that flows through my heart. And the truth is, if I lost her now, I might as well give up breathing. Because I wouldn’t even be surviving, I’d just be existing, and I don’t want to exist without her.
So we decided to come to a club. Fuck knows where that idea came from? Actually, it was probably Eric. Everyone was up for it though. Well, when I say everyone I mean Soph, Pea and Eric, the rest of us, yeah not so much. Knowing there’s still a threat that’s very real, I thought maybe going to a restaurant would be a better choice, but Soph wanted to dance and so did both Pea and Eric. After Soph filled Eric in on everything that had been happening, he’s decided to almost live at our house, acting like a little guard dog. It’s actually kind of cool to see the bond they share and Rich has fully integrated into the group now too.
Since almost the moment we got here, the three of them have been on the dance floor while the rest of us positioned ourselves at a table with a direct view of them. Con always gets agitated at clubs because he doesn’t dance unless it’s like a joke, so he has to watch Pea up there and hope that no guy touches her. However, I think her very pregnant belly puts most men off and thankfully there seems to be a gap around the women because of it. Soph and Eric have had a few shots too many and Soph won’t come off the dance floor, but I love to watch her. She’s beautiful anyway; she was born to dance, there’s no denying it. I know her dad would’ve wanted to help her achieve that dream if he were still here.
‘Gravity’ by DJ Fresh is the next track to pound out of the speakers covering the room and Soph morphs from club dancer to professional dancer in the blink of an eye. Seconds after she starts moving people start watching. She uses the music’s rhythm to punch her movements into the space likes she owns it. As if they understand that something special is happening people start turning to watch and suddenly everyone moves in around her, drawn to her like moths to a flame.
And she is the flame, the most beautiful, brave, fierce flame.
My flame.
I get up and make my way through the throng, aware that I still need to be able to see her. Partly for her safety, but more because it’s hard to take my eyes off her. I stand in the surrounding circle and watch her dance. Her eyes are closed and she’s in the moment, the one she’s told me about before.
“I close my eyes, and it’s like everything else melts away. It’s just me and the music and my heartbeat. I feel every beat of the tune, but it’s more. There are some songs…ugh, it’s hard to explain.”
She shook her head and bit her bottom lip.
“There are some songs that make you feel the words too. Like they live through you, like you need to act the meaning out. You’re spellbound and have no control. But these songs usually have the biggest meaning. They’re the songs that tell someone all you can’t say yourself, everything you need them to understand.”
I just watch her. She’s stunning.
I’m going to marry her one day.
The music changes to Usher, ‘I Don’t Mind.’ Slowly Soph’s movements draw in and become more contained as her eyes open. She jumps when she sees the crowd and people start cheering. I smile, but then as a couple of guys take a step toward her, I move in and slide my arm protectively around her shoulders.
“You’re so sexy, I can’t wait till I get my head between your legs later,” I whisper in her ear. She looks up at me through hooded eyes completely unaware that she was probably going to be chatted up. “Let’s go sit for a bit?” I say and she nods. I look around and see Pea and Eric grinning at us and I snag them both with a head nod and mouth that we’re going to sit down. They follow and we make it back to the table. Four women are now at our table and are obviously trying to chat to a very uncomfortable Con and Rich and an unimpressed Dane.
Soph leans into my ear. “Oh joy,” she mumbles and I chuckle. Pea walks over to Con and gets in-between him and the woman chatting to him.
The woman immediately shouts, “Hey!” But doesn’t say anything else after Pea sits on Con’s lap and Con takes her mouth with his and proceeds to do way more than what’s considered just kissing. The remaining women who are sitting with Dane and Rich look at me, so I quickly slip my arm back around Soph and I hear her laugh.
Dane is now
giving me a ‘help me’ look and I just wink at him, so he gives me the bird. I know I’m wearing a shit-eating grin when I lean over the table and say loud enough for them all to hear, “You all ready to go?” I don’t think I’ve ever seen a bunch of men so eager to leave a club, it’s actually really comical.
When we get outside and start walking back to our beachside house, Soph tells me, “I know one of those women back there.”
I look at her surprised. “Really, babe?”
She nods, pulling a strand of her loose hair away from her face. “Yeah, I wonder what she’s doing in Cornwall?” she says it almost to herself then looks at me before continuing, “She’s my agent’s assistant, and she hates me.” I jerk my hand in hers at that bit of information
“Why?” I ask.
“This and that,” she answers noncommittally.
“Babe, you can’t tell me something like that and then brush it under the carpet when I ask questions.” She seems to consider my statement for a second then nods to herself.
“She liked, well probably still likes Dane, and she has never liked me. The fact that Dane and I had a thing.” She stops and looks over at me, worry etched on her face. I smile, I know it’s tight, but I do my best. I want her to realise that she has a past, we all do, but I’m not about to make her feel shit because of it. Still, it stings to know that some of her past belongs to my brother.
“Ah, I see, so she’s bitter and twisted?” I ask and she nods again looking up at me in an almost shy, quiet way, as we walk. “Woman who feel like they’ve been wronged, are usually bitches, babe,” I tell her while rubbing my hand up and down her arm.
“I know, honey.” She stops and turns to face me placing her hand on my chest. “I’ve decided I’m giving it up when I get back.”
I stroke her face. “Giving up what?” I ask.
“This, the modelling. I have money from my dad. I’ve asked Dane if he will look at helping me to claim what’s rightfully mine, and then I’m going to focus on my dancing.”
Love Resisted (Entwined Hearts #2) Page 19
