She could feel him pulse as her orgasm ripped through her, shattering her limbs into a million pieces. She screamed as he plunged into her. But she took it, needing it, wanting it, loving every breath, every thrust, every second like this.
His breath was ragged on her neck, his dog tags sliding along her skin until he pulled her against his chest, rolling on his side, his arms wrapping around her stomach.
“I-I-” She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t know what had come over her. Some sort of primal need had attacked her hormones from under her skin. She’d never been taken from behind. She’d never let a man lick her sweet spot. She’d never begged for sex. She’d never felt like her body was no longer hers.
“Shh.” He kissed her neck. “Sleep.”
And within minutes she heard the gentle vibrations of Kyle snoring behind her.
14
Kyle
There was something in his arms. He jerked forward and then remembered. Whitney. He closed his eyes. That wasn’t supposed to happen. But she showed up in that barely there T-shirt and his bear didn’t have much choice.
Fuck. She was asleep in his arms. He slid out from under her, pulling the sheet to her shoulders. His bear wasn’t gentle either. He had been rough and demanding. Pushing her farther than he’d ever asked a woman to go. He commanded her. What did he expect his bear to do?
He paced at the foot of the bed, watching her sleep under the moonlight. He knew why he had taken her the way he had. He wanted that damn condom to pop off. The harder he pumped inside her, the rougher he got. He wanted to claim her. Fill her with his seed. Fill those gorgeous hips with his cubs.
He couldn’t. He was leaving again. Maybe he had fixed everything on the property, but the minute he claimed her his promise to Sam was broken.
He couldn’t leave her alone and pregnant. He shook his head. Maybe when the next mission was over, he could come back to her. He could claim her. They could have what his bear always wanted. What his bear needed. But not now.
There was no end in sight. There was no time table that would give her what she wanted.
He watched her sleep. She had already been through so much. He knew she was doing everything she could to keep it together. She didn’t deserve any of what happened to her.
It was his job to protect her and give her everything she needed, but he had made another promise. A promise he hadn’t fulfilled yet. His knuckles were white. His jaw clenched.
She sighed and rolled over. His heart stirred.
He didn’t know how many hours passed like that, but he watched her sleep, feeling the need to protect her. To keep her safe. To guard her heart from all the hurt in the world. The problem was he knew he was the biggest hurt of all.
* * *
“Good morning.” Whitney smiled, pulling the sheet to her breasts.
“Hey.” He grinned. He had gotten dressed and returned to the apartment with two cups of coffee.
He placed one next to her on the nightstand.
This conversation wasn’t going to be easy. He pulled his shoulders back and focused on the mission. He knew it would be the hardest fucking thing he’d ever done.
“Thanks.” She sat forward.
God, did she know how beautiful she was? He wanted to take her back under the sheets and finish what he started last night, but he couldn’t. The call had come last night when she was asleep.
Her eyes landed on his bag next to the door.
“What’s that?”
He sat on the edge of the bed. “I have to leave.”
“Leave? Now? What? No. No.”
“My team has been reassembled. I pick up my orders at thirteen hundred, which means I’ve got to get on the road.”
Her eyes shot to his. He could see the tears welling in the corners, but she looked away before they spilled off her lashes.
“I know I said I’d finish everything on your list, but…”
“You think I care about the list right now?” She looked hurt.
He shook his head. “Whit, I’ve got to go.” He rose from the bed.
“You’re just going to leave? After…after last night? After I…” Her hurt had quickly transformed to anger.
He knew it was shitty. He may not have claimed her as his mate last night, but he sure as hell took something else from her. They had given each other their bodies so deeply their souls touched. It was hungry and primal, but it was what they needed to feed each other. To share the connection they had both been fighting for weeks. No woman would give herself like that to him, and he knew it.
He hung his head. What could he say to her? He couldn’t make promises. He knew what she wanted to hear. That he’d be back. He’d call. He’d write. Something. But he couldn’t guarantee any of those things.
It would only make things worse if he gave her hope. He had to cut that off now.
Tonight he would be back in Razastan and he couldn’t guarantee tomorrow. If he made promises he couldn’t keep it would hurt her far worse then if he just walked out the door.
“Kyle?” She stood from the bed, dragging the sheet with her as she walked across the floor.
“You knew I was a Ranger, Whit.” He threw the bag over his shoulder. He couldn’t even look at her. If he did his bear might not let him leave.
The tears in her eyes cut right through him.
She clutched the sheet in her fists. “When are you coming back?”
“I don’t know. Don’t plan on it.”
“What?” Her voice squeaked. “Can you call? Can you tell me if you’re all right?”
“No.” He turned for the door.
It was killing him. It was as if someone was knifing him right in front of her. Only she didn’t know it. She couldn’t see the pain. But it was there, cutting him and slicing his heart in shreds. He’d never felt anything like it.
“I never should have slept with you.” She spoke through clenched teeth.
He shook his head. “Probably not.”
He closed the door behind him, leaving her standing in the middle of the room.
15
Whitney
Whitney wandered to the window and watched as Kyle threw his bag in the backseat of the Jeep before starting it up and driving away.
He was gone. He was actually gone. He drove away with every possession he had. Everything he owned was tucked in the back of that Jeep. He had mentioned it more than once. She realized now what a warning sign it had been.
It hadn’t been the only one, but she ignored them all. She plowed right through them desperate to land in his bed.
After last night, she couldn’t imagine he would ever leave. She sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the coffee mug he had brought her. No one had touched her like that. Looked at her like that. Possessed her body and soul in one blinding moment of bliss like that. He was as much hers as she was his. There weren’t words for what they did last night.
He didn’t kiss her goodbye. He wouldn’t even look at her.
Her clothes were folded neatly at the end of the bed. She pulled the T-shirt over her head, and made her way back to the house.
He was gone. Not gone for a weekend. Not gone for a business trip. Gone. There was no way to reach him. She couldn’t call or write. There was no email or texting. It was as if he had vanished.
It was as if last night hadn’t happened. There was no proof. No trace of him. Nothing. The man was a ghost.
She slammed the front door behind her. For a brief minute she had let herself believe there was reason to hold on to the house. Maybe Kyle was the reason. It could be their place. The place where they could build new memories. The place where they could create a new life together.
Why did she let herself think any of it was possible? There would never be a place he called home as long as he was a Ranger. She choked back the sob that was lingering in her throat. There was one thing worse than Kyle not being a Ranger—him not existing at all.
She glared at the fresh paint in the
hall. Damn him. Damn Special Forces. Damn the evil in this world that stole him from her.
She stormed upstairs to the shower where she could scrub every inch of her skin and every trace of Kyle Brake down the drain.
16
Kyle
The picture of Whitney’s eyes had burned in his mind. He fought it. He tried to lock her somewhere in the back of his head, but when he fell asleep she was always there. Haunting him. Reminding him that he had left his mate. He would reach forward, greedy to hold her soft breasts in his hands only to wake up with the cold desert wind on his face. He held his gun to his chest. He didn’t know if and when he could ever get back to her.
She would probably spit in his face. She’d never accept his bear now.
“Ready?” the pilot called over the headset. “We are two minutes out from the jump point.”
Kyle gave him a thumbs up and looked over his shoulder at his team. In two minutes they would be on the ground, heading for their target.
There was new information that he was hiding out in an abandoned hotel. There would be a lot of ground to cover. Operations had linked Kyle’s team with a Special Forces Delta team already in the area.
He waited while the helicopter hovered near the ground. When it was time he anchored his feet to the cord and jumped, rolling out of the way for the next guy.
Once they were all on the ground the chopper took off.
“Brake?”
Kyle turned as a heavily armed group moved toward them.
“Yeah.” He nodded.
“Jackson Landon.” He pulled down the bandana covering his face. “The guys call me Jax. My team is ready.”
Kyle took one whiff of the head of the Delta team and realized he was meeting up with another bear. They exchanged a knowing look that none of the other men would recognize.
This mission was dangerous, highly classified, and deadly. The only thing going for them was they had just added another bear to the team.
Kyle led his team forward with Jax and his men on their heels. They depended on him. He had to forget Whitney or no one was going to make it out of here alive.
* * *
Whitney
There were still a few boxes in the living room. She surveyed what she had accomplished in the house. The house would be on the market next week. There was only one more place to tackle. The damn barn.
She hadn’t been in there in weeks. She had avoided it. Sometimes she considered burning it down, but that would be rash and insane. Although understandable considering the shape her heart was in.
She lifted a handful of flattened boxes under her arm and trudged across the yard. Most of the things in the barn she could sell in an auction. She didn’t have any need for the table saws or the tractor. But there were things in the apartment that needed to be boxed up. And she knew one day she’d appreciate having a few of her father and brother’s tools.
She eyed the wall that Kyle had pinned her against as she closed the door behind her. It had been the best night of her life. She sighed and made her way to the workbench.
She had replayed it a hundred times. Would she have done things differently if she had known he was leaving? Would she have handed him her body the way she did? Would she let him devour her? She wondered if he had known and took her because it was the last night. He wouldn’t have to face her again.
She reached for a silver hammer and dropped it in a box. She made one box for trash. One to donate. One to sell, and the last for herself.
The morning passed quickly. She looked up when she heard the rain pelt the roof. The workbench was clear. She examined the tractor and decided to let the auctioneer give her a price.
Then out of the corner of her eye she saw something she hadn’t noticed in the barn before. She walked toward the sheet. She lifted it with one hand and her heart almost stopped when she pulled it away.
It was a bench. A beautiful, smooth bench made of teak. Her hands trailed over the back. Her initials were carved into the wood.
“He made this for me?” she whispered.
It didn’t seem possible. All those nights she had heard him in the barn, the saw going, the lights blaring. This was the project. Her fingers dug into the deep grooves where the W and C entwined.
She turned to sit on it. The anger had been there, pushing her to keep going. It was almost tangible. The rage made her feel alive. It made her stay focused. But sitting on the bench, this beautiful art he had made for her, something else broke free.
The anger ebbed and the tears started. She wrapped her arms around her shoulders. Behind the anger was something stronger. Fear. What if Kyle didn’t make it back? What if he ended up the same way Sam did?
Whitney let the tears fall, until she didn’t think there were any left.
17
Kyle
His eyes were blurry. His head pounded. Everything was dark, but he could hear screams in the distance. He tried to stand but his leg was pinned under a concrete block. The explosion. It started coming back to him.
The entire mission had been a trap. It was bad intel, served to them to lead them into an ambush. The building was on fire and if he didn’t get out, he would be a part of the next blast.
He shoved the beam off his leg, growling with the effort. He stood, looking for his team.
“Brake!” He heard the scream over the hiss of the flames. He leapt over the rubble searching for the voice.
He threw bricks and beams, until he uncovered the trapped Ranger. He stared at Shep, the team communication specialist. He carried the radio equipment in his pack, but Kyle knew it had been smashed into a million pieces. They wouldn’t be able to call for help.
He stared into the man’s eyes. They were wide with panic. The blood trickled along his temple. It started coming back to him. This was exactly how he found Sam. Trapped and surrounded by fire. Kyle felt the anger well up in him. He couldn’t let another man die like this. He wouldn’t let it happen. He grabbed the end of a concrete beam and lifted it until Shep could move out from under it.
“Let’s get out of here,” Kyle yelled, gripping Shep’s arm and dragging him from under the pile.
Kyle hiked him to his feet and pulled him out of the building.
“Where are the others?” he asked. He didn’t know how long he had been passed out under the beam.
“I think they got it before us. The Delta team was calling us back when the explosion went out,” Shep huffed as Kyle laid him against a wall.
“Do you think you can walk?”
Shep nodded. “If you could pull a building off of me, I think I can walk.” He looked at Kyle. “How’d you do that by the way?”
He shook his head. “I lift weights.”
Shep wasn’t buying it, but they didn’t have time to argue. Kyle could hear the gunfire. He had to find the rest of the team and get the hell out of here before they were captured.
“Any chance you can piece together your equipment to call in air cover?”
Shep winced as he tried to haul the pack over his shoulder. “I might have a radio in here that didn’t take a hit.”
“Good.” Kyle slapped him on the shoulder. “Call in our coordinates. I’m going back in for a sweep.”
“But the building is on fire. There are too many rooms to cover in the hotel.” Shep tried to urge him to stay. “There could be more explosives.”
“I’m not leaving until I know our team is out.” Kyle ran into the burning building. He wouldn’t leave anyone behind.
He ran into the side door, scanning through the smoke for any sign of the Ranger or Delta teams. He tuned into his bear’s instincts, knowing they would help him detect human presence.
He darted room to room, calling out for his men.
“Brake, over here!”
He peered through the smoke, his eyes landing on Jax.
Kyle jumped over a fallen door. “I have two men trapped under this wall,” Jax yelled.
Kyle nodded as he grabbed the other si
de of the wall. Together they lifted the wall high enough for the Delta team to roll out.
“Thanks,” Jax shouted. “I’ve already covered the second floor. Do you have all your men?”
“No. I only have the comm guy.”
“All right. My team is accounted for. I’ll take the rest of this level and I’ll meet you at the south exit.”
They ran in opposite directions, searching for the rest of the Ranger team. Kyle knew with Jax looking, the search would be thorough. If his men were here they would find them. Two Special Forces bears were worth at least five humans searching.
Part of the second floor had collapsed into the first level. There were places in the floor where the ground gave way, exposing a basement. It must have been how the target escaped. There were always tunnels and secret exits. No matter how accurate or timely the intelligence was they received, the target always seemed to be a step ahead.
Kyle kicked open a door, his anger growing. He pulled two more men out of the hotel, assembling everyone at the south entrance with Jax and the Delta team.
Shep was able to call in two helicopters with his radio. Fifteen minutes later they had enough air support to load the injured teams and get out of the city.
Kyle let his legs dangle over the side of the door, watching the desert blur past him as the helicopter flew them back to base camp. They had found everyone. The injuries may keep some of the men from staying on the team, but by some miracle no one had died. Kyle shook his head, knowing he was one of the ones who almost died today. Everything could have ended. Was that how he wanted to go out? Had he given his life everything he should have? He knew what the answers were.
Ranger Bear (Rogue Bear Series 1) Page 5
