Nicole and Claire were waiting for her in her suite. She grabbed her night attire and went into the bathroom, showered and changed.
She came out of the bathroom rubbing lotion into her hands.
“So how do you feeling,” Nicole asked.
“Mostly scared,” Renee said honestly.
“Scared of what?” Claire asked.
“Trying and failing,” Renee said. After a few moments of silence, she continued, “Scared of falling head over heels in love with my husband-to-be and him not returning my feelings. I think I give him too much power, and myself not enough,” Renee finished on a sigh.
“Honey spit it out, you are talking in riddles that only you understand, spit it out,” Nicole said.
“This is merely an arranged marriage. We both get other needs met by doing this. I care for him and he cares for me, but we aren’t in love. Lately he has been reminding me of that fact,” Renee explained more clearly she hoped.
“Protect your heart, above all else but do not awaken love until it so desired, there is no greater folly,” Nicole said as if from experience.
“No public displays of affection unless there is a photo opt,” Nicole threw in.
“No don’t listen to her, make love to him, and let your body say what you cannot with your mouth, but not too often. Uphold your end of the deal and be a great wife and mother, and remember that this was all her idea in the first place,” Claire said nudging Nicole and hopefully lightening the mood.
“Congratulations by the way on both accounts,” Claire said.
“Thank you and you are right, this is all Nicole’s idea,” Renee said enjoying teasing Nicole.
“Okay it was my idea, but y’all took it further than even I advised,” Nicole said accepting a portion of the blame. “But seriously, you were fierce today,” Nicole said. “You planned a wedding in a day, thought of everything, and left no stone untouched. You still got it, give yourself some credit,” Nicole encouraged.
“Thank you, but I do have an awesome team,” Renee said.
The ladies laughed and talked for about an hour and a half. They caught her up on all the Emerald Grove gossip. Alena had stuck around and was allowing Trenton to get to know their son Trevor much better. She was still keeping Trent at a distance because she wanted to be loved within her own right and not because she was his baby mama. She wasn’t pushing for a relationship with Trenton for herself. Ethan and Jasmine had selected a house to make a home for themselves and the twins after the wedding, and her sister was finally happy. Alexis was still pining after Jonathan Blake-Moore and he still hadn’t noticed. Claire was getting to know Santino Trujillo a tall handsome Native American, with long flowing hair down to his bottom, and an inactive marine from Blake-Moore and Associates. Donna and Michael were still spending a lot of time together, even though Donna could never date her boss. Chandler was still in college and dating every available female. Nicole was running a successful Day Spa in Emerald Grove. Everyone was in their happy place, at least that’s how they were telling it.
For the first time in a few days, there was no nausea and Renee was able to sleep in the massive king bed she had chosen to share with her Nicole and Claire.
Chapter 17
Antonio arrived home later than he expected. He went upstairs first to check on Renee who was sleeping like an angel. Then he made his way back downstairs and warmed up a plate of food Rosalie had left for him.
While he ate, Antonio looked over the work that Renee had been able to get accomplished in one day. Everything looked good and he couldn’t think of a single detail that she had missed. She was indeed a brilliant, well connected, hard-working woman. Antonio mused to himself. She consumed his thoughts all day and not just because she was carrying his child. Somehow she had managed to get under his skin. Antonio ran his big hands through his short curly hair, in frustration.
His mother had called him and told him that his words to Renee on the phone had hurt her in some way, even though she did not show that side to him. His mother said she had wiped the tears from her face and went back to work as if nothing was wrong. She had further informed him that his behavior was inexcusable.
He had never intended to hurt her. He had convinced himself that he had to keep her at a distance or she would know how he truly felt.
His problem was simple. He loved her, but she did not feel the same. Marco had even suggested that he attempt to court her once they were married so that it could become the real thing. Yet he was scared of pushing her and making her run away. She already had that deer in the head lights look about her at times.
He had all the best parts of her and that should be enough for now. Yet it wasn’t. “Wooing his wife,” he never had to work for affection from the opposite sex before. He wasn’t sure if putting his heart on the line was the way to go.
Antonio got up from the table, rinsed out his plate and glass, turned off the lights then went upstairs to bed.
Chapter 18
The next morning Renee awoke feeling more like herself. She completed her morning grooming process and slipped into a beautiful purple one piece sleeveless knee length summer dress. She added a slim gold belt that accented her waist line. She wore gold jewelry with matching gold sandal wedged heels. Nicole had come in and curled her hair until she had a mass of tumbling curls cascading over her shoulders and down her back.
Purple was one of the colors of royalty. Gold is a precious resource. She looked at both as professional, beautiful, and fun loving. Taking one last glance at herself in the mirror, she gave herself the okay to like herself and who she was becoming.
She joined Nicole and Claire in the hallway and they made their way downstairs. The Favero family was gathering for breakfast. Everyone exchanged greets.
Antonio stood and kissed the side of her face, then moved to pull her chair out for her, as his brothers did likewise for Nicole and Claire.
Renee smiled and inhaled his intoxicating scent.
“You look very beautiful this morning, “Antonio said.
She had walked in and stopped his heart for a moment. Then remembering that beating and pumping was a necessary activity, it kicked started like wild Arabian horses running in the wind. Her hair was floating behind her in a sea of cascading curls, her creamy rich medium brown skin was glowing, and a genuine smile that displayed her pearly white even teeth. A part of him had wished that he had been the reason she was smiling like that.
“Thank you,” Renee said. “You’re taking the whole day?” she asked.
“I’m not going into the office today, but there are a few things that will have to be handled from here,” Antonio responded. Do you not approve of my attire?”
“You look fine Antonio, but yes that is what prompted my question,” she said as her eyes quickly scanned over his fitted blue t-shirt and blue jean clad thighs. Antonio was like a tall glass of water, refreshing. His five foot eleven inch frame, lean muscular frame, well defined features all packed a powerful punch. It was like God sat down and said I am going to make Antonio Favero today, and just took his time. He had no physical imperfection what so ever. She knew from her personal exploration of his tanned body as they had made love over and over in Emerald Grove.
Renee shook her head from side to side to clear it. He was getting under her skin again without even trying.
She greeted Rosalie when she came over to their side. Who in turn smiled and nodded.
Belgian waffles with warmed maple syrup and melted butter, pork sausage links, scrambles eggs, fresh cut fruit, orange juice and coffee with milk were being served.
Stefano said grace and everyone began to start to eat. Halfway through the meal, Antonio informed her that his grandparents were coming to dinner and she would need to get with Rosalie to coordinate dinner.
“Sure,” Renee said. “Do your grandparents have a favorite meal?”
“He loves at good steak paired with an excellent wine. He will say that the sides were just window dressing
,” Antonio supplied.
“I will speak with Rosalie after breakfast to arrange a menu and check supplies,” Renee responded.
The rest of breakfast went by smoothly, with light conversing and easy banter. Antonio excused himself and went into his office to make a few phone calls and check his email. As time neared for the interview Renee started to feel a little more nervous coupled with anxiety. Renee decided to calm her nerves by taking a walk through Maria’s flower garden.
In every story there was more than one version, it all depends on your perspective on a given issue. It’s harder than people think it is to lay yourself bare for other people; and the world could be so cruel. Some people had already made up their mind about her. Some still had no clue as to who she was and why her story was even making news. Hopefully, after this interview people would know her better, hopefully understand her. Renee leaned in and inhaled the fragrance of a red rose and smiled as she did so. A camera flash went off alerting her that she was no longer alone.
She straightens and walks toward the patio entrance were Rosalie and Lisa Monroe and the photographer were standing.
After introductions were made they sat down on the patio swing. Rosalie offered drinks and refreshments. The photographer took a few shots and then finally they were alone.
Lisa Monroe, leaned in and said, “I honestly for the first time in my career am speechless and don’t know where to start?”
“The most pressing question on your mind right now has to be why me?” Renee responded.
“Yes, let’s start there,” Lisa said throwing her long brown hair behind her back as she laughed out loud.
“I chose you because you did some research on me and reported what that research turned up. You are not kissing my hind parts or making nice because of what my last name will be,” Renee said.
“So you aren’t mad about the story that I ran?” Lisa Monroe asked.
“Mad no,” Renee said then continued, “Hurt was the emotion that I felt more than anything.”
“I am sorry, sincerely, Lisa said. I owe you an apology and I guess that is where I should start,” Lisa said.
“Apology accepted,” Renee said.
“Renee, you were one of the most powerful women in International Business before the untimely traumatic death of your parents in an automobile accident. I understand that losing your parents in such horrible manner was devastating, but why walk away from everything that you had worked so hard for?”
“If I had known that I was going to lose them both so soon, I would have spent more time with them, making peace with them, and making memories, rather than chasing the old mighty dollar. Due to the nature of their injuries they died quickly, but it was a horrible sight to witness,” Renee summarized.
“It’s still hard for you, I can see it in your eyes that their tragic deaths are still haunting you,” Lisa observed.
“Probably will until the day that I die. Once you see body dismemberment, especially with someone that you love, you don’t forget about it. You have nightmares about it when you can sleep,” Renee responded.
“You said that you needed to make peace with your parents. Were you estranged from your parents at the time of their death?” Lisa asked.
“Yes and no,” Renee said. “When I was a freshman in college I was on my own; for the first time away from my parents strict rules. I guess you could say that I was young wild and free. I met a boy and I decided to give him my very precious gift. I got pregnant the very first time I had sex and we used protection and everything,” Renee said shrugging her shoulders.
“Oh, wow,” Lisa responded.
“Yeah, so I was faced with the option of dropping out of school or getting an abortion. I opted to get an abortion because it was what I felt was best at the time. During the process something went wrong and they could not control the bleeding. So I was rushed to a local hospital and my parents were contacted. The doctors worked and saved me,” Renee said then paused. After a moment she continued, “My parents were furious. My father said that I had behaved cowardly and that if I was old enough to make my bed hard I was old enough to lie in it. He said, I was selfish and a murderer. Mom didn’t say anything, but I could see the hurt in her eyes. I had disappointed them both,” Renee said.
Renee continued, “I came home only when I had to for holidays and school breaks, when the campus was closed. I thought if I worked hard enough, I would be forgiven. Yet our relationship was never the same,” Renee paused again. “On the evening, that they died, they were leaving my home and I had told them I was pregnant, again. Even though I was a fully grown woman, I was an unmarried woman. So, even if I kept the baby I still would mess up the family name. My father couldn’t leave fast enough. They got into an accident leaving my home,” Renee said filling the full impact of her words. “Even though, they felt that way about me, I still loved them very much. They were good people who had strong unwavering view points on life. I felt a sense of loss, but also a lot of guilt,” Renee finished.
“You also experienced another loss at that time and that was the loss of your unborn child,” Lisa stated.
“Yes, I wasn’t taking care of myself during that time and that very well may have been the straw that broke the camel’s back,” Renee answered.
“Losing the baby you mean?” Lisa clarified.
“Yes, it was a season of too much loss and I even lost myself for a while,” Renee said.
“During this time you became addicted to prescription pain relievers, correct?” Lisa asked.
“Yes, it was. Prescription medicine was an escape for me. It was initially prescribed to me after the DNC was performed for pain management. When life was more than I could handle, I would take one to help me sleep until I needed one. I wasn’t functioning at all, just sleeping. It’s how I coped. It wasn’t a good thing, it was a very dark time for me,” Renee explained.
“How so?” Lisa asked.
“Going through this experience was a very humbling experience for me. I’m the type of person who doesn’t allow herself to stay down for long. Life happens. Do whatever you have to or can do to survive, had always been the motto of my life. I wasn’t raised to stay stuck in my feelings. Not only was I stuck in my feelings, I was being suffocated by them. There were waves of doubt. There were waves of fear. There were waves of failure. All crashing back and forth, tossing me back and forth. There was an inner war going on and the way I saw it, I was losing. I doubted whether or not I was in fact that strong independent woman I had always claimed myself to be. I doubted that I would be okay ever again. I thought that I might actually die myself. I became fearful of losing my sister, my nieces, and my friends. I had stopped working. I pushed anyone and everyone away including Antonio. I was down for the count and instead of getting the help I knew I needed, I just stayed stuck,” Renee explained.
“What finally broke you out of the cycle?” Lisa asked.
“My doctor told me that if he had to write me one more prescription for pain he was going to have to recommend that I get psychological help. I started back reading my bible and praying, and believing the promises God put in there. Lastly, I realized that the way I was living was not honoring my parents,” Renee answered honestly.
“Wow that’s deep,” Lisa said. “You and your sister, South Carolina State Representative Jasmine Anderson, opened a rehabilitation center that helps victims of domestic violence, people with addiction issues and young adults who got off track to do job training and further their education. Tell us a little more?” Lisa encouraged.
“Yes, the center is called the LMK Rehabilitation Center. LMK stands for Love, Mercy, and Kindness. We both are very passionate about helping people. We have centers in South Carolina, North Carolina, Georgia and Virginia that are fully operational. We believe there are people who need help in this world, and if you offer them a hand they will accept it and start making changes,” Renee answered.
“Wow, that’s incredible. How can our readers help?”
Lisa asked.
“They can go online to www.LMKrc.com and make a onetime donation or set up a donation schedule of their choosing.
“Now, you are engaged to Italy’s favorite son, Antonio Favero. Marrying him next Saturday, in what I can only imagine as a fairytale ceremony. Antonio has been described as mostly all work and very little play. Yet he has shown that he is ferociously protective when it comes to you. Help us see him the way you see him, and please explain how you were able to capture his heart when so many others have tried and failed,” Lisa said teasingly.
Renee smiled and then answered, “Antonio gave me his heart. I didn’t have to capture it. I plan to take care of him in the same manner I desire to be taken care of. I know that must come off as arrogant, but I think that sometimes we spend too much time chasing love when we should just let it find us. When I reflect on our relationship, the times that I enjoy the most with Antonio are our times together just the two of us. It’s in those moments that we both can drop our guard and just be ourselves. No worrying about image and the proper thing to say or not to say. He is my friend first before all else. We talk about everything and it doesn’t get old. Then we have some amazing chemistry. I think that is what every married couple should desire to have, meaning someone is your homie, lover, and friend, you know,” she finished.
Your homie?” Lisa said laughing out loud.
“Yes, I can walk around in jogging pants and my old Dartmouth t-shirt that I love, with my hair a mess on top of my head and he still thinks that I am the most beautiful girl in the world. I feel the same about him, when comes in from a day where he was hands on in the fields and he’s sweaty and dirty, my enthusiasm of just seeing him is the same as it would be if he came home from a day in the office,” Renee answered.
His Desert Rose Page 6
