by Beth Wiseman
Rosemary whispered to her father once they were alone, “Time is too short. I know you love Katherine, and Mamm would want you to be happy. God is giving you another chance at love, at happiness.” She paused, studying her father’s guarded expression. “I’ve been wrong about Katherine, and she loves you very much.” Her father opened his mouth to speak, but Rosemary beat him to it. “And I know you love her.”
Katherine walked back into the kitchen, and Rosemary hurried out the door to the porch. Daed had to know this was all a setup, but she’d prayed that he could rid himself of any guilt and be happy with Katherine.
“Well, they didn’t say much to each other during supper. Do you think they’ll get back together?” Saul stood up from the rocker. “It’s hard to tell what your father is thinking, but he couldn’t hide his happiness when he first saw Katherine at the door.”
“I know.” Rosemary walked to where Saul was standing. She had so much more on her mind than her father and Katherine, even though that was important to her. “Danki for going along with my idea. I’m sorry we didn’t get to go out to supper like we planned.”
Saul edged closer. “Then I guess you still owe me a date.” He smiled, and as a gentle breeze swept across the porch, Rosemary caught the scent of something spicy. Saul gazed into her eyes, and she knew what was coming. They’d waited five years, and it was hard not to have regrets, but if things had happened any differently, they might not be together now. God always had a plan. On His time frame.
“Ya, I guess I do still owe you a date.” Rosemary squinted from the late-afternoon sun rays dipping beneath the porch rafters, and Saul instantly moved slightly to his left to put her in his shadow.
“Well, I’m pretending this is a date, and I know what happens at the end of a date, or what I’ve always prayed would happen when I finally got to take you out.” As he leaned down, his lips met with hers, and Rosemary felt sixteen again, sharing her first kiss with the man she’d always thought she would marry.
“Give me the chance, Rosie, and I’ll spend the rest of my life loving you and making you happy.” Saul kissed her again, and she decided there would be no more worrying about children. God would provide if it was meant to be.
They both jumped when the screen door creaked and Katherine and her father walked onto the porch. Katherine was smiling, which was enough for Rosemary.
“Shame on you for being so tricky,” her father said in a stern voice as he pointed a finger at Rosemary. But then his expression broke into a smile, and Rosemary made her way to where he was standing to hug him. “I love you, Daed.”
“I love you too, dochder.” He kissed her on the cheek before he eased her away and moved toward Saul, and as the men stood chatting, Rosemary walked over to Katherine.
As they shared a hug, Katherine whispered, “Danki, Rosemary. I will always love your father and be very gut to him. I’ll be a gut mudder to the boys too.” She stepped back, latching onto both of Rosemary’s hands with hers. “And I promise not to step on your toes. It’s still your haus, and I’ll fit into whatever role you would like.”
Rosemary smiled as she squeezed Katherine’s hands. They hadn’t formally announced it, but based on Katherine’s comments, Rosemary knew the wedding must be back on. “Nonsense. It will be your haus, and . . .” She paused, smiling as she looked over at Saul, then she leaned closer to Katherine. “I think Saul and I are going to make up for lost time, so it might be your haus sooner than you think.”
“Ach, Rosemary. I’m so glad. He’s always loved you, since you were both sixteen.”
Rosemary took a deep breath, basking in the hope that she felt, the love in her heart that had always been there—in hiding—for Saul.
“I thought we were going for a walk,” Rosemary’s father bellowed, then gave a hardy laugh. “Where’s mei maedel?”
Katherine bounced up on her toes, kissed Rosemary on the cheek, then ran to the man who would be her partner. When they had passed through the yard and toward the open fields, Rosemary watched the man who would be her partner moving toward her. He kissed her again, and Rosemary counted the many blessings of the evening.
Saul nodded toward the maroon pot at the far end of the porch. “Sometimes it takes awhile for a passionflower to root, but once it does, it can thrive for years with nourishment and love.”
Rosemary’s heart was fluttering as she listened. Her mother had told her the same thing years ago. Their passionflower had thrived for a long time. But Rosemary had let it die after her mamm passed. But she had a second chance with this one and was going to make sure to nurture it so it would stay rooted in love for a lifetime.
Just like she planned to do with Saul.
“I’ve missed this.” Saul kissed her again but then eased away. “Rosie, I’m fearful to bring this up and ruin the moment . . .” He took a deep breath. “But one thing is going to continue to haunt me. Can you tell me why you walked away before?” He paused, but spoke again before she could answer. “Because I don’t want to make the same mistake again.”
Rosemary swallowed back the lump in her throat. “It was never anything you did. I’ve been just as afraid to tell you the truth as you were to bring up this subject. Probably more so.”
“You can tell me anything, Rosie. It won’t make me love you any less.”
He loves me. But will he still after I tell him the truth?
She looked down, but Saul gently cupped her chin and brought her eyes to his. “There’s nothing you can tell me that will cause me to walk away.”
“I don’t know about that,” she said softly.
They were both quiet, and Rosemary leaned up and kissed him on the mouth, just in case it was the last time she’d be able to. She lingered for a while, but she knew she owed him an explanation. She eased away and took a step backward, but kept her eyes locked with his.
“I–I always wanted kinner.” She lowered her eyes for a few moments, then looked back up at him. “And I just couldn’t imagine not having a large family. I know. It was selfish. I should have known that our feelings back then would have been enough to sustain us, but I just couldn’t imagine my life without children.” She closed her eyes and waited, but when Saul didn’t say anything, she slowly looked up at him. “Please say something.”
He took off his hat, scratched his forehead, then put his hat back on. “I want a large family too. We used to talk about that when we were together back then.”
“Ya, I know we did.” She moved closer to him, praying that he’d understand. “I was young, and I thought that if I walked away from you, I’d find someone else whom I would love just as much, someone who could have children.” She shook her head. “But there’s never been anyone else, Saul. Only you.”
He was quiet for a few moments, then he rubbed his cheek and chuckled. “Rosemary . . .” He shook his head. “What in the world are you talking about?”
Rosemary bit her lip and tried to calm her breathing. “I know you can’t have kinner. That day I overheard your mamm talking to her cousin Naomi who was visiting. I heard them saying you couldn’t have children.” She paused and hung her head again. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know if you can forgive me. I don’t blame you if you can’t.” She gazed into his eyes. “But I love you just as much now as I did back then. Maybe more. And we can either adopt kinner or the Lord will provide if it’s meant to be. I just know that I want to be with you.” She held her breath. “If you’ll still have me.”
Saul’s expression was blank, and a tear slipped down Rosemary’s cheek. I’ve lost him.
“Let me make sure I understand,” Saul said. “You broke up with me because you thought I couldn’t have children?”
She nodded as another tear slipped down her cheek. “I’m sorry.”
Saul leaned over, hands on his knees, and started laughing. “I’m really not sure whether to laugh or cry.” He straightened and pulled himself together. “Rosemary, as far as I know, I’m quite capable of having kinner. You overheard
mei mamm and mei Aunt Naomi talking about Saul Bender, a cousin. He was in a bad accident back then, and his injuries left him unable to have children.”
Rosemary stopped breathing. “What?” Her mouth hung low for several moments as she let this news soak in. “Do you mean that we wasted—I wasted—five years?” Her chest hurt. “It was bad enough that I left you because of it, but for it to not even be true?”
Saul didn’t say anything, just shook his head.
Rosemary was sure that this was the most bittersweet moment in her life. And was Saul going to walk away from her?
“Why didn’t you just ask me?” He reached his hand out to her, but she backed away as she was swallowed up by regret.
“I don’t know.” She buried her face in her hands and started to sob. “I’m an awful person. We could have been together all this time.”
Saul pulled her close to him and held her tight for a while before he eased her away and kissed her on the forehead, then on the cheek, then his lips met hers. “If anything had happened any differently, we might not be together now. It was God’s plan for things to work out this way.”
“How can you say that? Aren’t you angry? At me? At God?”
“Rosie . . .” He reached for her hand and walked her to the shade of an oak tree in the front yard. They sat on the grass, and Saul brushed back a strand of her hair that had fallen forward. “If we had gotten together back then, how do you think your daed and bruders would have done on their own after your mother’s death? Maybe your father would have been so busy raising the three boys, he might not have noticed the spark between him and Katherine. My sweet Rosie. Everything happens on the Lord’s time frame. Not ours.” He pulled her close and kissed her tears. “We can’t have regrets. We are exactly where we are today because of every event that has led us here. I just want to be with you. I love you, and I always have.”
Rosemary buried her head in his chest, then looked into his eyes. “I love you too, and I always have.”
Saul grinned. “And I don’t know of any reason why we can’t fill a house with lots of kinner.”
Saul was right. Carrying the burdens of the past would only weigh them down. As she sat up and watched her father and Katherine walking toward them hand in hand, Rosemary knew that they were exactly where God meant them to be.
READING GROUP GUIDE
1. Rosemary ends her relationship with Saul because she believes he can’t have children. Have you known couples in this situation? If so, was it a deal-breaker?
2. Years later, Rosemary changes her mind and knows that she wants Saul as her husband, even if that means they will never have children. Do you think that Rosemary changes her mind, in part, because she is older and more mature? Or has enough time gone by that she realizes she won’t find anyone she loves as much as Saul?
3. Several scenes in the story are filled with large doses of miscommunication, and things could have turned out very differently had all truths been on the table. But, as mentioned in the story, things happen on God’s time frame, and by the end, all the characters are where they are meant to be. Are there instances in your life when you met resistance, only to have it play out much better than you could have imagined?
4. In a lot of ways, Rosemary and Katherine are alike. Can you name some of the characteristics they unknowingly share?
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
It’s always fun to do these collections with such talented authors. Kathleen, Tricia, and Vannetta—you ladies rock!
To my husband, Patrick, and my family and friends—thank you for your continued support on this amazing journey. And as always—God gets the glory for laying these stories on my heart.
Many thanks to everyone at HarperCollins Christian Publishing. I’m a lucky gal to work with such a fabulous group of people, and I’m blessed to be able to call you all friends.
To my agent—Natasha Kern—a huge thank you for your career guidance and friendship. You are just a supercool person!
It’s an honor to dedicate Rooted in Love to Jenni Cutbirth, a woman whom I admire. She’s someone who has more strength than she ever thought possible—a necessary trait when you find out that your two-year-old daughter has cancer. For a year, I watched Jenni go back and forth to the hospital, sometimes staying for days at a time for her daughter’s chemotherapy and radiation. A YEAR. I was exhausted just hearing about her routine, and I jokingly appointed myself “President of the Jenni Fan Club.” But all joking aside, my dear Jenni . . . you are amazing. And Raelyn is a blessed little girl to have you as her mommy. May God always shower you and Raelyn with His blessings.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Photograph by Saxton Creations
Award-winning, best-selling author Beth Wiseman is best known for her Amish novels, but her most recent novels, Need You Now and The House That Love Built, are contemporaries set in small Texas towns. Both have received glowing reviews. Beth’s highly anticipated novel, The Promise, is inspired by a true story.
Flowers for Rachael
KATHLEEN FULLER
To my husband, James: love blooms where it’s planted.
GLOSSARY OF MIDDLEFIELD AMISH WORDS
ab im kopp—crazy, not right in the head
ach—oh
bruder—brother
buwe—boys
daag—day
daed—dad
danki—thank you
dumm—dumb
dummkopf—dummy
familye—family
gaarde—garden
geh—go
grienhaus—greenhouse
grossdochder—granddaughter
grossmutter—grandmother
grossvadder or grossdaadi—grandfather
gut—good
hallo—hello
haus—house
Herr—Mr.
kaffee—coffee
kapp—prayer head covering
kinn—child, kid
kumm—come
maedel—girl
mamm—mom
mann—man
mei—my
nee—no
nix—nothing
schwester—sister
ya—yes
CHAPTER ONE
We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature—trees, flowers, grass—grows in silence . . . We need silence to be able to touch souls.
—MOTHER TERESA
Rachael Bontrager let the soft, loamy soil sift through her hands. The warmth of the June morning rays warmed her skin through the thin blue material of her dress. She pushed her kapp strings over her shoulders and picked several stray blades of grass surrounding the violet Verbena she’d planted a few weeks ago. “There. Better, ya?” She glanced around to see if anyone noticed her talking to her flowers. It wouldn’t be the first time she chatted to the plants in her garden, and it wouldn’t be the last.
She moved to check for weeds in a thick layer of Hostas and Coleus. Their vibrant hues of crimson, scarlet, evergreen, and emerald drew her closer, marveling at the beauty of the plants. She reached out and touched a ridged Coleus leaf, running her fingertips over the green edges to the lavender and magenta center. Her first plant, and it had returned since she planted the garden last year. A simple plant. Common. Yet to her, the most special.
The sound of heavy wheels crunching on the gravel of her grandparents’ driveway drew her attention. She hurried through to the wooden gate of the garden, opened it, then made sure to latch it securely behind her. This year the deer were especially plentifu—and hungry.
She shielded her eyes from the bright sun as she looked up at the driver leading a team of huge draft horses closer to the house. The warm June breeze lifted the yellow short sleeves of his shirt, revealing wiry, yet strong, arms.
Rachael gulped, forcing her attention from her handsome neighbor, Gideon Beiler, to the load of manure in the wagon behind him.
“Halt!” His deep voice had a husky quality that t
ickled her ears. He looked down at her and smiled. “Hallo, Rachael.”
“Hallo, Gideon.” She swallowed again, cringing at the high pitch of her voice. “Danki for bringing this.” The other day she’d asked his younger sister, Hannah Lynn, if they had any extra manure. Their family raised cows and goats to sell at auctions throughout the year. Hannah Lynn had said Gideon would bring it over. With her garden growing, Rachael needed more fertilizer than her horse could provide.
She walked to the back of the wagon as Gideon jumped down from his seat. She sniffed the air, expecting to inhale the pungent odor of manure. Instead, she barely smelled anything at all. She examined the load in the wagon, picking up a handful. She looked at Gideon. “This is compost.”
Gideon tipped back his straw hat as he neared. Rachael looked up at him, her neck craning to meet his warm brown eyes. He was at least six inches taller than her five-six height. He pushed his wirerimmed glasses closer to his eyes but didn’t look directly at her. “Ya.”
“From your place?”
He nodded. “We had a little extra from our garden this year.”
She glanced at the load in the wagon. “A little?”
“Uh-huh.” He finally looked at her. “But . . .” He shrugged his shoulders.
When she first met him last year, after moving to Middlefield from Indiana to help care for her grandfather, he barely looked at her, much less said anything. But since he lived next door and worked at his family’s farm, they couldn’t avoid each other. Lately she realized she didn’t want to.
She kept that to herself. Over time he’d learned not to be so shy around her, but that didn’t mean he was interested in her as more than a friend.
