No; Nina didn’t understand it either. Apparently, caring about people—in the personal way, not the principles of basic human goodness way—turned her into a scared little baby. Ick.
“Liar,” James murmured, as if he’d read her mind. As if he saw the secrets she was tempted to swallow. The tenderness in his voice said he didn’t mind her hesitation, that he’d guide her through it.
Then he caught her by the waist and pulled her into his arms. She squeaked in surprise and grabbed his shoulders automatically—but it only took a second for Nina to settle in like she belonged there, her thighs straddling his effortlessly. Just the act of spreading her legs around him made something low in her belly tighten. She pressed her fingers into hard muscle and bit her lip. Met his gaze and fought not to shiver at how close they were, his breaths ghosting over her skin, the slight edge of hunger in his expression impossible to miss.
That hunger grew easier and easier to see every time they touched. And Nina was starting to think about those times as something other than a mistake, something other than James’s biggest regret or the sin he couldn’t resist. She’d been so caught up in her own worries that she’d forgotten how steady, how solid, how consistent James Foster really was. But now she remembered: no matter what else changed, this man was always utterly, resolutely himself. And the simple fact was that James didn’t do casual sex.
Yet he’d fallen to his knees before her and dragged off her clothes and buried his face in her cunt. He’d stroked himself to orgasm while holding her gaze. He’d thrust into her mouth like he couldn’t do anything but.
So what, exactly, did that mean?
Her mind racing, she wrapped her arms around him and buried her face against his throat. “You know,” she murmured into the vibrating silence, “you’re incredibly huggable.”
His hands settled at her hips and squeezed. She felt his dick swelling beneath her, waited for him to push her away and try to hide it.
He didn’t.
Instead James stayed right where he was, massive dick and all, his grip on her tight and possessive. He asked with a dark note of amusement in his voice, “Huggable? Is that what they call guys like me these days?”
“Maybe.” She tried to ignore the sensation spiralling from his touch—this was supposed to be a soft and mushy conversation, not a Horny Nina conversation. It wasn’t as if he’d just grabbed her tits, for Christ’s sake. And yet his big hands resting on her hips felt unbearably erotic.
If they were naked like this, he’d be gripping her tight and pushing her down onto his shaft.
She swallowed, pushing the thought away for later. “‘Bear’ would probably fit, too.”
He pulled back and arched an eyebrow. “Which means...?”
“You really don’t know?”
“I’m a lot older than you,” he sighed. “I don’t know all this slang shit.”
“First of all, six-and-a-half years is not a lot. Jesus, you’re so dramatic.”
“And second of all?” His smile was a blatant tease.
There was no bloody second of all. With as much dignity as she could manage, Nina sniffed, “Some things are said purely for dramatic effect, you know.”
He laughed, and in that moment, he was so achingly beautiful that the force of her need almost broke her. She put a hand to his face, unable to stop herself, hypnotised by the sight of his joy—the curve of his full lips, the freedom in his smile, the lines cradling his dark eyes. He calmed slowly, his laughter fading until nothing but white-hot intensity remained.
“Nina,” he said softly, and that one word let her know that everything was about to change. “I adore you too. I think my biggest fear might be losing you.”
Her heart constricted. Something fluttered in her chest, a mixture of longing and panic. She bit her lip bloodless and kept her hand against his cheek and—hoped.
Sometimes, hope worked.
“I was so afraid,” he went on steadily, his voice low and rough with emotion, “that I let fear make me a coward. But you know what, Cupake? I don’t think it suits me.”
She swallowed. Hard. “Funny. I’ve been thinking the same thing about myself.”
One of James’s hands slid under her T-shirt to touch her bare skin. He swept his thumb over the curve of her hip, and a mortifying little whimper tumbled from her lips. What was it about this man? Was it the way he looked her in the eye as he touched her, like he was starving for every little reaction? Was it the slow, tantalising ease with which he teased out her responses?
Or was it the love she’d kept locked up in her chest until it grew too huge to hide or contain or deny?
Um, yeah, probably that last one.
“James,” she blurted out, with no idea what she might say next, except that it would probably be embarrassingly honest.
Except he got there first.
“I want you,” he said. “I’m not talking about sex, Nina. I want you. Bad. I can think of a thousand reasons why I shouldn’t, but I’ve been trying to stop for a while, and I can’t, so I guess none of those reasons really matter. I just need to know if you want me, too—”
“I do,” she said, breathless, giddy, her mind scrambled with pleasure. Her fingers curled into the fabric of his shirt as if part of her feared this moment might be yanked away as suddenly as it had come.
“But how?” he demanded. His fingers slid over her throat in a possessive hold she’d never felt from him before—but he’d come close, she remembered; often, he’d come close. He was always holding onto her in a thousand little ways, touching her more firmly than a friend might.
And she’d missed every signal. Or maybe he’d just hidden them well beneath that calm, reasonable façade.
“How do you want me?” he demanded. “Because half-measures aren’t an option. I told you once I can’t be like those boys you take to bed. I can’t be that to you. I won’t. And if that’s all you’re offering, I’m not—I won’t take it.” He forced the words out between clenched teeth as if they hurt to say, but still, he said them. “We’ll just have to go back to the way it was before. I’ll still be here, Nina. But when it comes to this—this thing between us, I’m all or nothing.”
And with that, for the very first time, she understood. Everything. The hesitation, the dance of hot-and-cold they’d been doing, why she’d been unable to figure James out for the first time in her life. It had never occurred to her that he might honestly believe she’d put him in the same category as any other man in her life. He wasn’t like anyone else. Not in any way. But obviously, she hadn’t been very good at showing him that.
Hadn’t been brave enough to show him that.
She would be, though. For him, from this moment on, she fucking would be.
She traced a shaking thumb over his lower lip and let her question escape on a whisper. “Why don’t you trust me, James?”
“I trust you completely.” She felt his answer as much as she heard it, his breath shivering over her hand.
“But you think I’d hurt you?” she asked softly. “You don’t think I know what you need?”
Shock flitted through his gaze. He took a deep breath, his chest rising visibly. “We—before the first time you kissed me, Nina, you and I have never been like this.” But his voice caught. And the words were jagged, harsh. And his eyes burned.
“Are you lying to me, James?”
His jaw hardened.
“Are you trying to say, before the first time we touched, you’d never thought about fucking me? That when I caught you looking at me like you wanted to bite, that was all in my head?” Her words came out hot and slow, and each one seemed to pain him.
“I—shouldn’t have. I shouldn’t now.”
“Because?”
“I’ve known you too long. We’re friends. You’re Markus’s—” He sucked in a breath. “But shit, Nina, the problem is—the problem has been for a while now, that I don’t fucking care. This is complicated, and if it goes sideways it’ll be messy as shit an
d it will fucking destroy me, and I. Don’t. Care.”
Nina hadn’t thought she could smile this wide. But apparently, her face was capable of incredible things when she had a gorgeous man at her mercy, listing all the reckless ways he wanted her. Leaning forward until her lips brushed his, she whispered, “Good.”
He released a shaking breath, one that shimmered with all the need and tenderness burning between them. “Nina,” he said, his voice low and rough. “What are you trying to do here?”
“I’d think it was obvious,” she murmured. “I don’t chase men, but I’ve been chasing the hell out of you. You don’t do casual—” She broke off with a moan as his hand tightened around her throat, his thumb stroking over her pulse. “God, James, that’s hot.”
“Glad to hear it. Now finish your sentence before I die.”
She huffed out a laugh. “You don’t do casual, and I don’t want casual with you. James… I’d never risk our friendship for something I could get anywhere else. This is it. This is more.”
He closed his eyes, a frown creasing his brow. “Nina. Baby. Please tell me you mean it. Because if I get my hands on you again, sweetheart… letting go won’t be easy, let’s put it that way.”
He couldn’t possibly know how those words lit her up inside, how they sent an answering dart of possessiveness through her. “Good.”
He opened his eyes. Their gazes clashed, his golden-brown to her near-black. And then the lust between them, an electrical current dancing just beneath the surface of every interaction, surged to life.
James kissed her. He kissed her, and it was everything.
Chapter Ten
How had he ever denied himself this?
Nina was explosive in his arms, her lips soft and sweet against his, her taste utterly intoxicating. James couldn’t think beyond the sensation of her tongue teasing his mouth, her hands grabbing his shirt, her lush body pressed against his. But somehow, he maintained enough awareness to decide that he was not about to love her on this fucking sofa again. This time, he’d have her in a bed. And this time, he wouldn’t stop.
She wanted him. She wanted him, truly and completely, and he knew her well enough to realise that she wouldn’t break his heart—not on purpose, anyway. If she was asking for this, she meant it. And if she meant it, he could take the risk.
Fuck, he wanted this woman so bad, he’d have tried to seduce her into love even if all she wanted was a quick fuck. But apparently, she wanted… more.
“This is it.”
It would be. James planned to make sure of that.
He swept Nina up into his arms, laughing when she gasped against his mouth, and carried her to the bedroom so fast, he barely remembered the journey. All at once she was lying in his bed, where she belonged, and he was sliding between her thighs where he belonged, and their lips met again, and heaven came down to earth just for them.
“Take this off,” she panted, pulling at his shirt.
“Take these off,” he countered, dragging down her sweats.
“Stop, stop, stop.” She laughed and pushed him up into a sitting position. “Get up. Get naked. Find a condom.”
He stood and dragged his shirt off over his head. “While we’re giving out orders, you should get naked too.”
“On it.” She was already kicking off her bottoms. He paused for a moment, mesmerised by the movement of her soft, lush thighs, and then she parted her legs and he saw the wetness darkening her underwear.
He gave a hoarse groan, his head falling back. “Woman. Jesus.”
“Concentrate on your assigned tasks, please,” she said, pulling her top over her head. He was so hard, so thoroughly distracted by the bounce of her suddenly naked tits, that he almost missed the hint of laughter in her voice. “If we both stay foc—James!”
He couldn’t help it. He was still wearing his boxers when he pounced on her, and he didn’t have a condom yet, but he couldn’t be expected to follow instructions when she was sitting there looking like that. Nina lay beneath him, laughing helplessly as he straddled her. His focus was split between her smile—she was so fucking beautiful when she smiled—and her breasts, sweet handfuls with tight nipples that belonged between his lips. When he bent his head and flicked his tongue over one blackberry tip, her laughter turned into a low, husky moan and her hands slid down to cup his head.
“Oh,” she sighed, “yeah. You can stay there.”
“Just here?” He looked up, arched an eyebrow, and reached between their bodies to palm the wet heat of her pussy. “Are you sure?”
Nina bit her lip. “No? Maybe? No. See, this is why we were supposed to focus.”
“I’m completely focused,” he said, which was true. He was focused on getting her naked, making her come, and pushing his hard, aching cock inside her. In that order. Maybe with a few extra orgasms thrown in. To that end, he bent his head and sucked her nipple fully into his mouth, even as his hands worked to pull off her underwear. She arched her back, pushing her tits in his face, and he decided that the scent of her skin might be more vital to him than oxygen. Then, her underwear finally disposed of, she wrapped her thighs around him. He felt the hot, slippery kiss of her cunt through his boxers, scalding his dick and tightening his balls and sending sparks of desperate pleasure down his spine. If her skin was oxygen, her pussy must be life itself.
He couldn’t lose his head, though. This was for her. Everything he did was for her. So James resisted the urge to kiss his way down her body and bury his face between her legs, even though he was pretty sure she’d enjoy it—and even though he still remembered, still dreamed about the intoxicating taste of her. Raising his head to look at her, gritting his teeth against the hunger that pounded through his bloodstream, he asked, “What do you want, sweetheart?”
She blinked up at him with lust-drugged eyes, relaxed in a way he’d never seen before. She trusted him. The thought made his heart swell, made him prouder than anything he’d ever done. Then her legs tightened around him and she rocked against his painful erection and he had very few thoughts beyond fuck and Nina and now.
“I want you,” she said, her voice hoarse and urgent. “Just—James, can you just fuck me? I know you probably want to do all that romantic shit, and I’m cool with that, but right now I really, really need your dick in me, so… um… what are you doing?”
He was reaching over her, opening his bedside drawer and grabbing a box of condoms, that’s what the fuck he was doing.
“I’m with you on that,” he said, ripping a latex packet open with his teeth. “We’re fucking. Your wish is my command. Etcetera.” He rose up on his knees, shoved down his boxers and went to roll on the condom, but she stopped him, covering his hand with hers. He looked up to find Nina staring at his dick like it was dessert, her dark gaze lingering on the swollen head, the gleam of pre-come, the fine veins standing out against his skin. He was really fucking hard. Really. Fucking. Hard. And so turned on that when she licked her bottom lip, his dick actually twitched. He gritted his teeth against the stab of sheer lust that went through him, tried not to come all over her pretty face right then and there—
But Nina slid a hand between her thighs and circled her own clit with a finger, and his control shattered.
“Fuck,” he gritted out, rolling on the condom with a speed he hadn’t known he was capable of. “I need inside that pussy before I lose it.”
She spread her legs wider, kept stroking herself. “Hurry up, then.” Her voice was a ragged whisper. Her folds glistened, all slick and soft and open for him, like the best kind of taunt. James covered her body with his, holding his weight on one hand, using the other to grab her thigh and spread her even wider.
“Ready, baby?”
“Yes,” she breathed, her hips lifting, searching him out.
“Keep touching yourself,” he ordered. “Tell me if it hurts—”
“Maybe I want it to hurt.”
“Shit, Nina. Unless you want me to come before you get any dick whatsoever, k
eep that to yourself.”
She laughed, but the sound cut short when his cock found her entrance. He bent his head to kiss her pretty, filthy mouth, and as her tongue met his, James pushed.
It was a slow, easy glide into Nina’s tight cunt, her wet heat welcoming him like they’d been made to fit together. “Ohhh, fuck,” he hissed. He hadn’t meant to; pure bliss dragged those words out of him. It felt as if his lungs had seized, his heart had stopped, the world had paused, and he was frozen in a shard of impossible, sharp-edged perfection. Then, all at once, the moment passed. But he couldn’t forget that feeling—not when Nina was soft beneath him, her pussy slick around him, her hands demanding as she pulled him closer. Then she kissed him again, and he’d never known anything so divine as this, as having her everywhere in every way.
Driven by mindless, frantic need, he thrust. Hard.
Nina had kind of expected James to fuck her brains out, but she hadn’t been ready for this. No-one could be ready for this.
Her need for him was ravenous and wild and it had teeth. When his thick cock shoved deep inside her, the sweet friction and the eventual, perfect glide made her toes curl. Tendrils of pleasure tightened around her limbs and held her hostage, every muscle in her body straining under the ruthless pleasure he gave her. But even that wasn’t enough to assuage the need. Not yet.
So she clung to him and met him thrust for thrust, revelling in his warmth and his strength and the raw, guttural sounds he made as he pounded into her. When he lowered his head to suck her nipples again, she could’ve cried. His tongue swirling around her sensitive areola and his cock sliding over her G-spot and his pelvis rocking against her clit all conspired against her until she was practically sobbing, gasping out things she’d never thought she could say. “Oh my God, oh my God, I need you forever, don’t stop, don’t ever stop I can’t take it, fuck, James.” On and on, her pleasure spilled out like an ocean overflowing, and then, somehow, he made it worse.
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