I’m going to fail anyway. Maybe I should just stop trying.
As soon as Katie considered giving up, she was caught by a nervous excitement. Her skin began tingling like she had rubbed it vigorously with a knitted scarf. Maybe I’ll run into someone at the Hoffstetter store. I’ll just say a couple of things. Nothing too bad, just enough to remind them that they should be afraid of strangers.
Pulling up in front of the small, colorful Mennonite shop, Gathering herself and standing as tall as she could, Katie walked into the small fabric store.
A chubby, middle-aged woman with her hair pulled back in a bun and bonnet, but wearing a shockingly light colored dress, barely gray, looked up as Katie entered and gave her a bright smile. “Gut morning! I am Sabine Hoffstetter, and who do I have the pleasure of serving today?” Sabine’s eyes were a few shades darker than her dress, and they twinkled with good humor.
“Hi, um, I’m Katie Miller. I live in the Big Valley Amish community? And I need to buy some patterned fabric for quilts for two kinder. It’s for a client.”
“Well, come on in! Let me see how I can help you out. How old are the kinder?”
Katie fished her scribbled notes out. “Oh, uh, the little boy is three and the little girl is about to turn one. Their mam says their birthdays are close together, so she’s trying to get everything ready ahead of time...as far as their gifts go.”
Sabine tipped her head to the side. “Katie Miller... You and your mam quilt, right?”
“Ja, we do.”
“Okay, ja. I just wanted to make sure I had you straight. What with all of the quilters we have in Big Valley, you know? Now, let me show you the little boy fabrics we have. Patterned with trucks, trains, planes and the like. Blues, browns, greens and even some yellows. Has the mother given you an idea of the colors she wants?”
Katie peered at her notes again, grateful she’d asked for this specific information. “Ja, she said their rooms are blue and yellow for the boy and pink and light purple for the girl.”
“Gut! That makes it so much easier. Now, take a look at these fabrics over here. I’ll set them on this table, and you can choose the fabrics for the boy’s quilt. For the little girl, we have flowers, cartoon-style horses, and Disney princesses. At her age, I would go with the horses and other little-girl patterns.”
“Ja, let me see what they might like the best.” Katie looked carefully at the assortments of fabric that Sabine had put on the long table. “Okay, I like the idea of the train fabric with a blue backing. For the girl, I love that purple fabric. And I agree. The horses are so cute! I want that fabric.”
“Standard sizes for a twin bed and a crib, right?”
Again, Katie looked at her notes. “Ja.” She felt a prickling at the back of her neck. She looked over her shoulder to the front of the shop. Nothing stirred outside the windows or door. What if the Englishers were following her? Another story, but one that felt scarily real.
“...any notions? Katie?”
“Wha...oh! I’m sorry. Ja, I need blue threads for the little boy’s quilt.” Katie pressed spools of pink and purple thread against the plain, purple fabric. “And for the little girl’s quilt, I’ll take a couple spools of purple thread. Do you sell lace and rick rack?”
“Ja, I do. Right over here. These shades will go well with the boy’s quilt. Do you want a pink or white lace? Or even a violet lace?”
Katie was in her element. Forgetting about the possibility of being followed or anything else but what she would soon be creating, Katie sorted through the colored lace and decided she would buy for the little girl’s quilt. “I think the violet would be the best choice. It pulls the whole combination together.”
“Oh, I agree. You’re going to have to show these quilts to me before you deliver them to your customer!”
Katie smiled, feeling better than she’d felt in several days. She didn’t need to tell terrifying stories. She could create beautiful things. Paying for her purchases, she promised she would be back. “I’ll tell my friends that you have everything they would need.”
What a nervous young woman, Sabine thought as she began to put away the fabric samples. But it’s clear she loves her work.
“Denki, I appreciate that!” After Katie had left, Sabine kept wondering about the association her mind wanted to make on her new customer. When she couldn’t, she shook her head and began cleaning up.
“It’ll come to me, with Gott’s help.”
Outside the little store, Katie was stashing her bags in the back of her buggy when the unsettling feeling hit her again. Was she being watched? Abandoning her bags, she slowly turned and scanned the road and trees beyond. Nothing. Scurrying around to the other side of the buggy, she jumped onto the driver’s seat and spurred the horses to move as quickly as she could. She was at least a mile down the road before she dared to slow down. Looking at the horses, she felt guilty. They were panting, and she could see a sheen of perspiration on their coats.
Back by the store, Annie Yoder stepped out from behind a large tree. Shaking her head, she walked swiftly to her own buggy. She didn’t even know I was behind her almost the whole way here, but she noticed something when she left. I’ll need to be careful. Maybe Eli can help out. I don’t want her to know it’s me following her. If she senses that someone’s behind her, maybe she won’t spread rumors, if she’s the one doing it.
Again, Annie shook her head, this time, sadly. She felt grief knowing that gut people in Big Valley were living in fear of being attacked by a non-existent person.
What puzzles me is, why? To what purpose? If it is Katie, she will be responsible for so much!
Katie and her parents had moved to Big Valley from out of state. What brought them here? When I first saw them, Katie was withdrawn all the time. She was never allowed to be away from her parents. I wonder...did she do something where they used to live that they were forced to leave for? She hasn’t yet taken her Kneeling Vows. Annie nibbled her full, lower lip, a habit she had when she was deep in thought.
The question niggled at her mind as she went through the rest of her day and, later on, when she and Eli met to go on a date that evening. Annie wanted to enjoy this time with her boyfriend and found herself resenting Katie more and more as thoughts of the other girl pushed her out of what should have been a series of happy moments.
“Annie. Annie!” Eli nudged her side with his elbow. “What’s going on?”
“Oh! Eli! I’m sorry, I was thinking about something.” Annie blushed.
“I got that. You’ve been lost in thought all night, and from that look on your face, it is a serious thought. What’s up?” Eli asked.
Annie explained. “It’s about Katie. I realized that after her and her family came here from Indiana, Katie was never allowed out of the sight of her parents. She couldn’t spend time alone with her friends at their houses, go on rumspringa activities, or run errands for her mam. Every time they’d go shopping, she was with them, like a little child. And that started me wondering, why is that?”
“Well, now she does have more freedom, but when that happened, the rumor started, don’t you remember? “
“Ja, but it died down. And the second time it came up, she was at home with her sick mam. I’m not sure it’s her.”
“It’s her. She’d have an easier time getting out if her parents were ill.”
Eli was incredulous. “You really think she’s that cruel?”
Annie sighed. “I don’t know. Is she still seeing your brother?”
“Ja, she is. I’ve tried to talk him out of it. Something about Katie has always seemed off, but he won’t...well, nee, I can’t say he won’t listen. He’s been at a little more of a distance with her. I’ve seen that, and she doesn’t like it.”
“I think she painted that sign,” Annie continued. “It was near her house, and it wouldn’t have been difficult for her to get out in the middle of the night to do it.”
“That’s a bit of a stretch.”
; “The thing is, that sign was right in the middle of our district. If they drove a car, they’d have had to stop it on the side of the road, and that road gets enough traffic someone else would have seen. It’s one of the reasons why Katie’s family was able to buy land in the middle of the district so quickly because nobody really wants to live so close to the turn in that road. And if the Englisher walked that deep into the district in the middle of the night, they’d have had to figure someone would notice. But another Amish person, especially one who lived nearby, that’s a different thing.”
“You’ve really thought this through.”
“I don’t want it to be Katie. I don’t want it to be anyone! It’s just...” Annie closed her eyes. “We have to find out for sure if it’s her or if it isn’t. I don’t want to present these vague suspicions to the deacon, though I think he suspects Katie as well. We need evidence, one way or the other.”
Eli shifted on his seat, thinking. “If we could get together on days when she’s likely to be running errands for her mam, we might be able to learn more.”
“Ja, we could.”
“I’ll keep an eye out. You shouldn’t be the only one keeping an eye on her. Let’s switch back and forth, so we’re less likely to be detected. We’ll share notes. And I’ll let Dat know because I know he suspects her as well.”
“That’s gut.” Annie leaned her head against Eli’s strong muscled shoulder. “Denki.”
“We’ll get to the bottom of things. Together.” Eli said. Though they didn’t speak of Katie again for the rest of the evening, her possible actions cast their shadow over the evening. It was bittersweet when Eli kissed Annie at her parents’ door.
IN THE BARN AT HOME, Katie jumped out of the buggy, willing her legs to stop trembling. There was nobody behind you! You saw nobody! You aren’t being followed. Resting her forehead against her horse’s sweaty flank, Katie closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
“Katie? Are you okay?” Her dat shouted through the barn door.
Katie flinched. Taking a deep breath, she said, “Oh. Ja, I am. I just got the feeling I was being followed. I hurried home—that’s why the horses are lathered.” Katie tried to hide the shakiness of her voice.
Hearing her response, John straightened out and shut the barn doors. “Followed? Do you think it’s that English person?”
Nee. Ja. I don’t know. All I know is I was leaving that Mennonite fabric shop and I just got a creepy feeling. I’m going to put these inside. Can you get water for the horses?”
“Ja. Ja.”
Unwrapping her arms from around her middle, Katie grabbed her purchases and ran out of the barn, leaving John to unhitch and take care of the horses. When he was done, he went into the kitchen and briefed Mary on what had happened to Katie.
“Ja, I saw she was scared, but she didn’t say much beyond she felt like she was followed. Do you think it was...?” Mary’s worried eyes sought John’s gaze.
“I don’t know, wife. She wasn’t sure. She said, ‘Nee, ja, I don’t know,’ when I asked her. All I know is that she was spooked. Where is she? In her room?”
“Nee. She’s putting her purchases away. I told her to go to that Mennonite shop so she wouldn’t have the chance or temptation to tell any stories. Also, I just don’t want her among the English until we know who it is and that they’ve been stopped.”
“Gut. I’ll go look in on her. See if she’s calmed down.” John strode down the hallway, worried about Katie. Peering into her workroom, he saw her still looking pale as she put her things away. “Daughter, are you any better? Maybe you should have some hot tea to calm down.”
“Maybe, denki, Dat. I’m better now that I’m inside.” Katie’s smile was shaky.
“Tell me what you remember. And don’t say you can’t. I want to know what we are up against.”
Katie sighed, knowing she had no choice. Closing her eyes, she put herself back at the Mennonite shop. “I was putting my bags into the buggy. Then, I got a strange, shivery feeling, like someone was watching me. It was creepy, Dat. I looked all around and even tried to see beyond the trees. But I didn’t see anyone. I didn’t hear anything, either. That’s when I just got into the buggy and hurried on home. I didn’t want to be out in the open.” Katie’s eyes filled with tears and she sobbed once.
John pulled Katie into a hug, not knowing that this was what she needed most. Physical expressions of affection were few and far between in the Miller home.
Feeling her dat’s arms around her, Katie was able to pull herself together. Normally, being touched unexpectedly made her tense up, but her father’s hug was gentle and a bit constrained. Another sob escaped her. Closing her eyes, she focused on the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. “Dat. I’m sorry.”
“Gott was telling you something—that you needed to get to safety as fast as you could.”
Maybe it was Gott. But if it had been Gott, why hadn’t He warned Mam and Dat about Uncle Levi? Why had He let Esther leave? Had He told her to run away, and if so, why hadn’t she written?
Maybe Katie hadn’t been followed at all. Maybe the feeling had come from weeks of fighting the compulsion to lie. What if her stories were driving her crazy?
“Katie?” Her dat loosened his grip and took a step back. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“How do you know if it’s Gott or just something inside of you?” Katie asked.
Dat stiffened, and his expression grew
“Thank you, Dat. I feel so much better now.”
Chapter 3
Just a few days later, Annie and Eli got together, as Eli had promised. Annie had folded two pages of notes into her apron pocket. As she stepped into Eli’s buggy, she heard the pages crinkling gently. “Where are we going?”
“I had an idea, and I hope you’ll hear me out. Remember we were talking about Katie and those threats the other day?”
Annie nodded.
“Well, I want to visit an English restaurant.” As Annie paled, he spoke quickly before she could tell him ‘no.’ “Wait, this is why. We suspect the threat is groundless, that nobody wants us gone, right? If we go openly to an English restaurant and we are treated well by the servers, if our food is well-prepared and other customers aren’t glaring at us, we may be able to begin proving that Katie Miller’s lying.”
Annie looked down, willing her heartbeat to slow down. She sighed. “Eli, that is so scary! Even though I suspect she’s lying about all of this, I still have a little doubt that maybe someone is out there. You know?”
Eli nodded. “Me, too. So a part of this is an exercise in faith for me. I am trusting in Gott that we will be safe and that we will be able to start gathering proof. I want to take it to my dat so he can get the elders involved. Please?”
Annie sighed again. “Okay, but if we get even one hint that we aren’t welcome, we get our food to go, and we leave. Promise me?”
“I promise. I’m taking you to the country restaurant in town. On weekend nights, it’s always full of families.”
“Okay. Annie sounded slightly doubtful but was willing to go along with Eli. After several minutes, they pulled into the restaurant and found an empty parking spot for buggies.
Inside the restaurant, they were seated by a friendly, smiling host. “Your server will be with you in just a minute.” He gave them menus and their place settings, then left.
Annie looked around, noticing all the families as they drank, ate and talked. She didn’t see anyone staring at them with fear or anger. Instead, she saw a little girl smiling shyly at her and giving her a small wave. Her heart melting, Annie smiled and waved back as well.
Her eyes roved around the spacious room once again, and she allowed her gaze to rest on a curious young woman who looked at her for several minutes. Annie noticed the woman wearing a polo shirt with the logo of a university in New Mexico.
Eli was looking around as well. He noticed servers, managers, and customers looking at them with curiosity. As an English man got up and began w
alking toward them, he tensed, waiting for a confrontation.
“Hello. My name is Sam. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Sam extended his hand for a handshake.
Eli gripped Sam’s hand in his own, giving it a couple hearty shakes. “Eli. Eli Smits. How are you?”
“I’m good. I noticed you and your girlfriend looking around, kind of afraid. I live here in Big Valley, and I work in City Hall. We’ve become aware of some kind of threats against you. Can you tell me more about them?”
Eli swiveled his head and looked at Annie, questioning her.
Annie nodded. “Go ahead.”
“Well, maybe, Sam. What is your role at City Hall?”
“I work in the Public Relations office. That means that I have to write articles and press releases on behalf of the city, announcing events that are coming up. Mayor Kerry Winters sat down with me last week to bring me up to speed on these threats. She’s trying to find out if someone’s really doing this. We’re directing law enforcement to look out for anyone painting those messages, leaving anything written or saying anything to anyone, whether they’re Amish or not. I am appalled at what is happening and, if it does turn out someone ‘English’ is behind all this, we will do our utmost to stop them and make sure they pay the price for doing so. You and your fellow Amish community members are members of Big Valley, whether you choose to mingle or keep yourselves separate.”
Eli was convinced of Sam’s sincerity. He smiled. “Denki. All’s we know is that we started hearing someone English wanted us gone, to leave Big Valley. These whispers stopped for a while, and then they started back up. Then...that sign was painted on the fence.”
“Yes. Our police officers are investigating that. Can you tell us what’s happening in your community?”
“Fear. A lot of fear. I had to convince my girlfriend... Oh, I’m sorry. This is Annie. Annie Yoder.”
Amish Trust and Betrayal Page 2
