‘How would I cook this?’
‘You’re best to cook it whole, bone in,’ Kim told her, her mouth dry with nerves. ‘In the oven, with some olive oil and lemon juice. About half an hour.’
‘What do you think?’ Caroline looked at the boy – man? – with her. ‘Do you like turbot?’
‘I dunno. Where I come from, fish comes in batter. From the chippy.’ He grinned at Kim, who had the strange feeling she knew him, but of course she couldn’t possibly. There was no one like him in Tawcombe.
‘You just need some new potatoes and a bit of salad,’ she told them. ‘Beautiful. You won’t get fresher than him.’
‘We’ll have it,’ said Caroline.
Kim lifted the turbot ceremoniously and wrapped it carefully in brown paper. She hesitated, nervous, but decided to go for it. How often did you get to meet one of your heroes?
‘Can I just say … I absolutely love your books,’ she said to Caroline as she handed it over. ‘My husband’s a fisherman and I sometimes can’t sleep when it’s rough out there for worrying about him. Your books take my mind off it.’
Caroline’s face lit up. ‘Oh,’ she said. ‘That’s lovely to hear. I’m down here writing at the moment. I shall think of you when I get stuck.’
‘I hope you don’t mind me mentioning it.’
‘No writer ever minds,’ Caroline assured her. She turned to her companion. ‘Do we, Radar?’
He shook his head, laughing. ‘We love praise. It’s what we live for.’
‘Oh,’ said Kim, the penny dropping. She’d seen pictures of him in the paper, and in magazines at the hairdresser. ‘Are you … Radar Thingy?’
‘Yeah. For my sins.’
‘My daughter never reads usually but she loved your book.’ Amy and her friends had sighed over his photo.
‘Well, hopefully there’s another one on the way.’ He nodded his head towards Caroline. ‘She’s got me locked up. I’m only allowed out for an hour at dinner time. She’ll chain me up again till tea.’
‘Don’t listen to him,’ said Caroline, handing over her credit card.
Kim looked at them both. Wondering. Were they an item? They certainly seemed happy together.
‘Well, good luck with the writing. And enjoy your fish.’
She watched them leave the harbour, Caroline sweeping along in her kaftan, Radar strolling beside her like her consort. Good on her, Kim thought, if they did have something going on.
The encounter had made what was already a good day into an even better one, and she looked forward to telling Jim about it over dinner. Neither of them usually had anything out of the ordinary to talk about. Bits of town gossip and the kids was their usual topic of conversation. She liked it like that, to be honest. It was safe, familiar territory.
‘Hey, look at you,’ she said later that evening as Jim came into the kitchen ready to go out. He had on the dark blue floral shirt she’d bought him for his birthday, and it made his eyes seem even brighter. He hadn’t been sure about the flowers, but there was something about his hard muscles under the soft fabric that made Kim still melt.
She’d put on a dress, a change from her usual sweatshirt and jeans, and had her hair in mermaid waves, like Amy had taught her, instead of scraped back in a ponytail.
‘We scrub up okay, don’t we?’ she laughed, taking his arm for the walk into town.
At the restaurant, they ordered a bottle of prosecco to celebrate their last payment and their first night out for months. Kim raised her glass, her eyes shining.
‘Well, here’s to being debt-free.’ She frowned when Jim hesitated to touch his glass to hers. ‘What is it?’
‘There’s something I need to tell you.’
Oh God. He was ill. With what? Or he was going to leave her. Who for? She raked her mind for possible diseases, possible temptresses. ‘What is it?’
‘Jed Matthews is packing it in. He’s giving me first refusal on the Pelican.’
Jed Matthews was the oldest fisherman in Tawcombe. He’d taught Jim everything he knew. The Pelican was the most envied boat in the harbour. State of the art.
‘Well, you can do just that. Refuse.’ Kim smiled, thinking that was that. Then she frowned. Jim was staring at her.
‘It’s a great opportunity, Kim. She’s a lovely boat. I know every inch of her. He’d give me a good price.’
‘We’d have to take out another loan. We’d have to pay another crew.’ Kim could feel panic rising inside her. The relief of being debt-free had been massive. The thought of taking on another loan made her feel sick.
‘It’s the perfect way to grow the business. And Noah …’ He looked down at the table. ‘Noah’s been talking to me. He wants to join me.’
Kim could feel herself crumple.
‘I thought he wanted to go to uni. I thought he wanted to do marine studies.’
‘He doesn’t see the point in spending three years studying and getting into debt. He wants to earn money, Kim. He wants to be independent. Start living his life.’
It was a fair argument. She could see that. But she didn’t want Noah out at sea with his dad. She couldn’t manage both of them out there full-time. The fear. The worry. The sleepless nights. She thought of the books, the Caroline Talbot books that had kept her from going completely mad.
‘I don’t think I can handle that,’ she said, her voice very small. She didn’t want to hold them back or stamp on their ambitions. But as a wife and mother, it was too much to bear. She knew they didn’t understand. She knew they thought they were invincible. You had to, or you’d never go out.
‘I won’t do it without your blessing,’ Jim said. ‘But Matty Roberts will buy the Pelican if I don’t, and Noah says he’ll join him.’
Oh no. Anyone but Matty. Kim knew Matty would be glad to have Noah, a local lad brought up on the sea who knew what he was doing. Her stomach roiled like the water in the harbour when a storm was brewing. She took another sip of prosecco but it burned. She wanted to cry. This was supposed to be a joyful celebration.
A tear trickled out onto her cheek. She let it fall unchecked. Let Jim see her cry. She never cried.
He reached out and brushed it away. ‘Kim. If we just stop here, and don’t push ourselves, what are we going to do with our lives? We’ve got another twenty years of work left in us. We should be investing. We didn’t notice that mortgage payment in the end. If we don’t put that money towards growing the business, it’ll just get frittered away. We owe it to the kids, to show them how to better yourself.’
‘We have bettered ourselves! We started out with nothing.’
‘But we could have more. And they could have more. It is all for them, in the end.’
Kim stared at him. She was angry now. ‘So you’ve made up your mind? Is that what you’re saying?’
Jim put down his glass. ‘This wasn’t my plan,’ he said firmly. ‘But Jed offering me the Pelican did get me thinking. It’s too good an opportunity. If we don’t grab it, someone else will have her. That’s fish we could be selling. Profit we could be making. And if we put a good team together, that’s Noah’s future sorted.’
‘I wanted more for him.’ Kim looked at her husband.
‘More?’ Jim looked blank. ‘This is as good as it gets, Kim. Our way of life. On our terms. In our home town. Surrounded by people who know and love us. Why wouldn’t you want that for Noah?’
‘I wanted him to have an adventure. Do all the things we’ve never done. What have we ever done?’ She put her glass down. ‘I’ve never even been to London, Jim.’
‘You could have been. You know that. There’s nothing stopping him doing all of those things if he wants to. He can travel the world when he takes time off. He’ll have money. He’ll be different from us.’
She put her face in her hands. She couldn’t think. She tried to make sense of everything Jim was saying. And the trouble was, she knew he was right. She’d seen Noah on the boat, confident and at home. He knew the ropes. He’d be a goo
d fisherman. And Jim was right about them not standing still. It would be too easy to coast along now the debt was paid off. She knew she worked harder when she was under pressure, and thought of ways to bring in more cash. You had to be hungry to get on.
And she wasn’t going to let Matty Roberts get his hands on her boy. Wasn’t going to let Matty’s wife Natalie flash her a triumphant smile when she bumped into her. Natalie with her long red nails and hair extensions. She was not going to let Noah pay for Natalie’s life of luxury.
She sat quietly while the waiter refilled their glasses. This was how life worked. It set you challenges. It changed course. It made you think differently, about yourself and those around you. And it was a compromise. Things didn’t always go the way you wanted them to. When that happened, you had to adapt. This hadn’t been her dream for Noah, but she would get used to it. They would make it a success. They were a team.
And perhaps she’d feel a sense of pride, not fear, when she looked out into the harbour and saw them chugging out to sea. And she’d still have her boy nearby. He’d buy a little house in the town. Marry a lovely girl. She’d look after the grandkids, eventually. Not everyone had that.
She picked up her glass again. She felt calm and composed. And proud. Jim and Noah would be a great partnership. She didn’t know where Amy would fit in yet. Amy, who wanted to study theatrical make-up at college and get as far away from Tawcombe as she could. She’d be behind her, whatever she decided. That’s what you did, as a mum.
She held her glass out to Jim.
‘To the Pelican,’ she said, and as he took in her words his eyes crinkled up with pleasure. She didn’t know anyone with bluer eyes.
‘To the Pelican,’ he echoed, and she felt the bond between them tighten, as strong as a fisherman’s knot.
SEAFOOD SUPPER RECIPES
I am so lucky where I live to have access to freshly caught fish. As well as the fishmonger on the harbour, there is a fish van that comes on a Thursday with a tempting display nestling on ice – bright eyes look out at me, silver skin glitters in the sunlight, offset by the coral-pink of prawns and scallops and slabs of salmon. The scent of ozone makes my mouth water and choosing is almost impossible, and it’s usually my wallet that dictates my purchases.
It took a while for me to be confident enough to experiment with everything on offer and not just plump for the familiar. This summer, I bought an enormous brill, as big as a car tyre, and under the guidance of my chef friend Simon Browne was able to fillet it, with a sharp knife and a sharp eye. We ate the fillets cooked in butter, with a fennel, orange and watercress salad and tiny cubes of roasted potato (the perfect accompaniment to any plain fish), and I felt a huge sense of achievement.
It’s a great outing, when we have guests, to go to the fishmonger on the harbour and choose our catch. Whether it’s just a bag of prawns to pull apart and eat with granary bread and butter, or a dozen celebratory oysters to put on a silver tray, there’s always a sense of ceremony and excitement.
Often nothing much needs to be done – the fish speaks for itself. But here are a few of our family favourites.
Fish pie
I like to keep fish pie simple. Others like to add spinach, broccoli, sweetcorn, mushrooms or halved eggs, but I prefer just adding some parsley to the sauce, and then serving a selection of lovely crisp green vegetables on the side: green beans, mangetout or sugar snap peas, or a mound of good old Birds Eye peas!
Mashed potato or pastry for the top is a matter of personal preference too. Mash makes it more of a nursery dish and slightly more comforting, while pastry provides a crunchy contrast.
I quite often divide the mix and the topping into four individual dishes, which is useful if people are wandering in at different times to be fed. In which case, they only need 20 minutes in the oven.
SERVES 4
800g mixed fish, cut into 2cm chunks – I use a mix of salmon, cod and smoked haddock
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
500ml semi-skimmed milk
50g butter
1 tbsp flour
1 tbsp finely chopped parsley
Juice of ½ lemon
1 tbsp crème fraîche
200g raw king prawns, shells removed
For a mash topping
1kg floury potatoes, peeled
50g butter
1 tbsp milk
Handful of grated Cheddar cheese (optional)
For a pastry topping
1 × 320g sheet ready-rolled puff pastry
Preheat the oven to 220°C/fan 200°C/gas mark 7.
If using the potatoes as a topping, boil them in salted water until tender. Drain thoroughly and put through a potato ricer, then add the butter and milk and beat until you have a lovely smooth buttery mash.
Put the fish in an ovenproof dish, season and cover with the milk. Put in the oven for 10 minutes to gently poach. Remove from the oven, strain the milk into a pan and set aside the fish. Put the milk over a low heat and add the butter and flour. Whisk gently while the butter melts and the flour is incorporated. Bring to the boil then turn down the heat and simmer for a few minutes, whisking all the time until the sauce starts to thicken. Cook for about 5 minutes, then add the parsley, lemon juice and crème fraîche, stirring until it’s all nicely mixed in. Add the prawns and heat through until they turn pink, then gently stir in the cooked fish.
Put the fish mixture back into the ovenproof dish, smooth out and then top with either the mashed potato or the flaky pastry. You can, if you like, sprinkle some grated Cheddar over the potato, but I find this a flavour too many and prefer the mash plain against the fish.
Put in the oven for 30 minutes until the potato is browned on top or the pastry is golden.
Lobster mac and cheese
This seriously luxurious comfort-food classic is a real indulgence if you have guests. I sometimes serve it in individual copper dishes for the ultimate wow-factor. Bringing it to the table with its golden crust bubbling away always means groans of anticipation. Nursery food with a grown-up edge.
SERVES 4
2 cooked lobsters (you need about 1kg meat)
400g dried macaroni
For the sauce
1 tbsp butter
1 white onion, finely chopped
1 tbsp flour
125ml dry white wine
400ml full-fat milk
2 tsp Dijon mustard
200g Gruyère or Comté cheese, grated
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
For the breadcrumb topping
1 tbsp butter
1 garlic clove, finely chopped
100g breadcrumbs
Handful of flat-leaf parsley, finely chopped
100g Gruyère cheese, grated
Preheat the oven to 220ºC/fan 200ºC/gas mark 7.
Using a large sharp knife, cut lengthways through the head of the lobster, down the body and through the tail to give you two halves. Discard the head, gills and any pink roe and remove the pinky-white meat from the tail. Crack the pincers with a nutcracker and remove the meat with a skewer. If you have the patience, crack the legs and use a skewer to prise out the meat. Cut the lobster meat into even chunks.
Cook the macaroni in boiling water according to the packet instructions, until al dente. Drain and set aside.
To make the sauce, melt the butter in a saucepan, add the onion and sweat until nicely soft. Add the flour and cook gently for a minute or so, then add the wine and whisk to remove any lumps. Add the milk a little at a time, continuing to whisk, then cook over a low heat for 5 minutes until the sauce is slightly thickened. Add the mustard and cheese and stir until it’s melted. Season well.
For the breadcrumb topping, melt the butter in a frying pan and add the garlic, taking care not to burn. Tip in the breadcrumbs and coat evenly in the garlicky butter. Remove from the heat and stir in the parsley and cheese.
Stir the sauce into the macaroni then add the lobster. Pour into an ovenproo
f dish and add the breadcrumb topping. Transfer to the oven and cook for 15 minutes until bubbling and the topping is nicely browned.
Crab linguine
This is one hundred per cent our family favourite. It’s super-quick to prepare – you will barely have finished your first glass of wine before it is ready. I buy two dressed crabs to make this, stirring the brown meat through first to coat the linguine, then scattering the sweeter, lighter white meat on afterwards, though it doesn’t really matter if it all gets mixed together in the process.
SERVES 4
1 × 500g packet dried linguine
1 tbsp olive oil
2 garlic cloves, finely chopped
1 red chilli, deseeded and finely chopped
2 dressed crabs, about 120g each
Zest and juice of 1 lemon
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
Handful of chopped flat-leaf parsley
Bring a large pan of salted water to the boil and cook the linguine according to the packet instructions, until al dente. Remove from the heat and drain, reserving about 50ml of the cooking water for the sauce and returning the linguine to the saucepan.
In a small frying pan, heat the oil gently and add the garlic and chilli. Cook gently for a couple of minutes, taking care not to burn.
Add the brown crab meat to the frying pan and stir to warm through. Add most of the lemon zest (keep some to garnish) and the juice and season to taste. Stir this mixture through the drained linguine in the saucepan and warm through. If it feels a little dry, which it can do, add some more olive oil or the reserved pasta cooking water to loosen it a little. Then scatter the white crab meat, parsley and reserved lemon zest over the top, and serve.
Vodka prawn penne
Adding vodka to a home-made tomato sauce is one of my favourite discoveries: there’s something about its addition that makes the tomato sweeter and less acidic and unlocks even more flavour. Happily the combination lends itself well to the addition of prawns, so this is a really stylish and robust pasta dish that should put a smile on everyone’s face.
A Day at the Beach Hut Page 10
