Sam took deep breaths, trying to calm his own desire. Anna’s hands were digging into his flesh, her body rocking against him as his finger dipped in an out of her impossibly tight wetness. He had to keep himself under control, he reminded himself. She was a virgin. She needed time.
He felt her insides tightening, getting closer to orgasm. He pulled his finger out and laughed quietly when Anna’s fist slammed against his shoulder, frustrated.
Sam gently pressed her back onto her back, pushing her legs wider with his knee and settling himself on top of her, his weight on his forearms. He looked down at her face for a moment until her eyes opened to look at him. He smiled down at her. “This okay?”
Anna nodded again, her eyes small and wild with need. He leaned down and kissed her.
She felt his body weight press harder against her as he reached out toward the bedside table. She looked over, watching as he opened a drawer and drew out a light blue condom foil. Leaning up, she kissed his neck. His hips moved upward off of hers for a second as he pushed the condom on.
When he laid back down, she felt the length of him push against her inner thigh. She felt anxiety coil itself tightly in her belly.
Sam leaned down, his lips seeking hers gently. His tongue slipped inside her mouth, finding her tongue and carefully teasing it. Anna sighed against his mouth, her legs falling down against the mattress.
He pushed himself upward slightly, reaching between them. Her whole body tensed for a second before she felt the tip of him rub gently up and down, parting her folds. He moved it upward, working circles against her clit of a second. Then it was at her entrance, pushing.
The pressure built as her body ached for him inside her. She felt his cock press against her, just shy of being painful as she realized he was trying to push inside of her. Sam’s eyes were small and intense. Her own big and fearful. And then the wide head slipped just barely inside, the skin of her body widening around him with a burning painful sensation.
“Ow ow ow,” she said, closing her eyes tightly against it.
Sam’s face buried in her neck. “I’m sorry, honey. I’m sorry. You want me to stop?”
She did. He was only just barely inside her and she felt like she was being ripped apart. But she didn’t want to stop either. Somewhere just beyond the pain was her body’s realization of getting what it was begging for. If she just relaxed a little, if she could bear with the pain for a moment, she knew she was going to enjoy it.
She shook her head. “No. Don’t stop.”
Sam took a deep breath. His hand slipped between their bodies, his fingertip finding her clit and moving in slow, excruciating circles.
She felt a rush of wetness fill and her and move outward, her desire building. Sam groaned, his eyes closing. His nerves felt overworked and tingly and his cock was throbbing with need of release. He felt her wetness slick around him and carefully pushed forward, half way inside of her. Her legs flew upward, her eyes flying open. She whimpered deep in her throat and he knew he was hurting her.
“Okay, okay,” he said, kissing her quickly. “Let’s try this,” he said, rocking his cock gently, not quite moving out or pushing forward.
Anna tensed for a moment, expecting pain. But she found only a growing friction that wasn’t quite friction, a pulsating, budding want. Her legs tightened against his hips, her own rising up toward him. Sam smiled down at her. “Better?”
Anna groaned, her arms going around him, her nails biting into his shoulder. “Oh,” she panted, grabbing his hips.
She pulled him deeper inside. The pain was quick and buried underneath her building climax. Sam felt the head of his cock push up to her back wall and groaned. He felt his control slipping. He pulled his cock halfway out, pushing it back in. When she moaned, her starting thrusting faster, his cock pushing deep and hard into her over and over. He felt her flesh tighten around him.
Anna felt a heaviness in her chest, an inability to catch her breath and she knew she was close. His thick, hard cock filled her so full and she felt herself grabbing at him, pulling him back in as he tried to pull out. Her legs wrapped tightly around him, her hips shoving up toward his, meeting him thrust for thrust. Her moans grew louder, begging him over and over again for… something. She didn’t even know what.
Sam’s head pushed against her collarbone. She was pleading underneath him over and over. “Sam. Please. Oh, Sam, please.” He felt his orgasm coming fast, he groaned, pushing into her faster and faster.
Anna felt pushed right to the edge. She was suspended in the strange nothingness for a few long seconds before his cock slammed into her one last time and she felt her insides clench around him over and over, her wetness flowing around as she cried out against his neck.
Sam felt her finish, her muscles grabbing at his cock over and over again, her legs like vices around him. He had to push against them to thrust into her two more times, cumming hard and fast, groaning her name out as his body shook with release.
His body went taut as a bow above her as he came, his cock twitching inside her. Her name ripped out of his lips, desperate as he finished. His body went down on hers heavy and still. She turned her face into his neck, her body starting to shake beyond her control.
Sam stood up quickly, moving to the bathroom. She heard the water running for a split second before he returned. He grabbed the blanket off the floor, pulling it up and over them.
He pulled her against him, holding her tightly as he body shook gently but uncontrollable. He heard her sniffle against his chest and kissed the top of her head gently.
She hadn’t expected to be emotional. Her body was shaking, proving beyond her control as her nerve endings were completely overwhelmed and frazzled. She felt the tears rise to her eyes suddenly and she didn’t have the strength to fight them off. Sam held her against him, pulling the blanket over her up to her chin. Eventually, overworked and spent, she drifted off to sleep.
Sam felt her go lax against him, falling asleep. He didn’t think he would feel what he was feeling. Emotional? More connected to Anna than any other person he had met.
Anna must not have slept long, she realized waking up. Sam had shifted them so he was on his back and she was across his chest. He was still awake, staring blindly at the ceiling. The room was dark except the light coming from the bathroom. She sat up, carefully, wincing at the pain between her legs. She moved out of Sam’s arms and scooted toward the end of the bed.
“Hey,” Sam said, grabbing her arm as she went to stand up. “Here,” he said, wrapping the blanket around her. “take this. You’re going to want to shower,” he said quietly.
“What? Why?”
Sam smiled down at her. “Just trust me,” he said cryptically as she walked toward the bathroom. “I’ll grab you a shirt.”
Anna closed the bathroom door, taking off the blanket and folding it on the counter. She grabbed a towel, padding over toward the shower and turning it on. She looked down and felt her heart sink. There covering her upper thighs was dried blood. Oh, god. She looked back toward the door. The sheets, she realized, feeling embarrassed. There must have been blood on the sheets. She grabbed the blanket and wrapped it around herself again, rushing out the door to… she didn’t know. Shoo Sam away so she could strip the bed? Something like that.
But she walked into an empty room. The light was on and Sam had already stripped the bed.
Anna walked back into the bathroom, climbing into the shower and standing under the spray until it ran cold. She patted herself dry then wrapped herself in the oversized towel.
How were people supposed to act after sex? Did they all feel as awkward as she did? Did they just get dressed and go about the rest of their days?
She walked uncertainly back toward the bedroom. Sam was in sweatpants and shirtless, pulling the comforter up on the bed, sheets changed. He smiled over at her, straightening and coming toward her with a t-shirt.
He rolled it in his hands and pushed it down over her head. The towel fell
away as she slipped her arms into the sleeves. “I think I have more of your clothes than you do lately,” she commented and he laughed.
Sam touched her under her chin between his thumb and forefinger. “You okay?” he asked, genuinely concerned.
Anna looked up at him, her hand slipping toward her belly. “I’m starving,” she admitted and was rewarded with a huge, booming laugh.
He leaned down, kissing her forehead and reaching down to take her hand. He pulled her toward the doorway. “Me too, lets go find some food.”
Nineteen
Anna walked home in the early morning light after insisting that she had to get back and get to work. After stuffing her with another unnecessarily healthy meal, he lead her back up the stairs. They climbed into bed, Anna awkwardly staring at the ceiling as he got in next to her. She felt him brush up next to her, reaching for a shoulder to pull her onto her side to face him.
He kissed her until she felt tingly all the way down to her toes. They fell asleep a while later, facing each other, Anna’s fist resting on his chest, his arm draped over her hips.
So she hadn’t exactly told him how she felt about him. That was supposed to be the plan. She was supposed to find a way to tell him that she had never met anyone like him. That he was the first person she thought of when something went well, or when something completely fell apart. That she had more than just sexual feelings toward him.
Anna shook her head, letting herself into the kitchen, confused to see Sylvester who she had let out to hunt before she left the night before. She pet her hello quickly before walking toward her room. Something seemed out of place in the living room. Curious, she turned and froze, her mouth falling comically open.
“What’s his name?” Viv said, a wicked smile spread across her face.
“Mom,” she gasped, not fully comprehending what was happening.
Viv patted the seat next to her. “That dress looks even better than I thought it would,” she commented.
“Mom what are you doing here?” Anna said, sitting down numbly next to her, trying to ignore the aching between her legs.
Viv lifted a perfectly shaped eyebrow. “That call the other day. I was worried. You didn’t sound like you,” she said, sending her a strange smile. “I should have known it was about a man.”
“I was having issues with the farm,” she hedged, knowing it was partly true.
Viv completely ignored the statement. “So it’s getting serious, huh? You’re sleeping with him. He’s your first, right?”
“Oh my god, we are not discussing this,” Anna groaned, her face turning red.
Viv patted her leg, smiling. “Oh, yes we are. I’ve waited years for you to have a boy we could talk about. You aren’t going to take this away from me. So what’s his name?”
Anna sighed. Viv was not the type to give up. Ever. “His name is Sam Flynn. He owns the farm that way,” she said, pointing.
“Details. Details,” Viv insisted, rolling her eyes. “How old is he? What does he look like? What does he do? You’re killing me here.”
“He’s older. I don’t know exactly. He’s ridiculously tall and has this blondish shaggy hair and brown eyes. He’s a goat farmer.”
“And how was the sex?” Viv asked, making Anna lean against the couch and cover her face in her hands.
“It was good,” she said, wishing she could crawl up in a ball and disappear.
“Good,” Viv said, backing off for the moment. “I’m going to put the kettle on,” she said, despite the heat. Anna followed her into the kitchen, watching with curiosity as Viv knew where everything was. “Oh, honey. Let me tell you about this yummy thing I saw on the way in. I had to stop at this little rinky dink gas station in town and there was this man…”
“You saw Eric,” Anna broke in, her voice entirely too eager even to her own ears.
Viv’s lips quirked up at her tone. “Ohh, so there are two men in your life,” she said, her eyes lighten up. “Now that’s my daughter,” she laughed. “No wonder you called me. You’re so out of your depths here. That man just oozes sex.”
Anna smiled, looking down at her feet. “Yeah I know.” There was a certain sadness in her voice.
“What happened there?”
Anna shrugged a shoulder. “We dated a little. But I…”
“Liked this Sam guy better,” Viv finished for her. “Out of curiosity,” Viv started, pouring the hot water into cups, despite the stiflingly hot house. “is Sam the stalwart, strong, good hearted type?”
Anna’s head shot up. Her mother never ceased to amaze her. “Yeah.”
Viv handed her a mug of tea, no milk and no sugar. Healthy. “I always saw you ending up with that type. But I think test driving that Eric would have been a life changing experience.”
Anna laughed quietly. “We turned the car over. Just never got out of the driveway,” she said and Viv laughed, a musical sound.
Viv considered her over the rim of her mug. “You’ve changed so quickly,” she said, her eyes looking wistful. “It’s not just the sex though I’m sure that’s part of it. You’ve grown up.”
“Things are going really well here, Mom,” she said and meaning it. “I dunno… I feel like I belong here.”
A flash of something strange crossed Viv’s face right before she smiled, walked over to her and threw an arm around her.
“I’m really glad you found your place, baby. You know you have no food in this fridge?”
Anna laughed, shaking her head. Her mother would always be… her mother. “I had people over helping me out the other day, we used up all my food.”
“I see, well I am going to go drop by that farmer’s market in town and get us some supplies. You go get yourself changed and do your farmer thing. Don’t worry about me.”
Anna smiled, walking closer, went up on her tippy toes and kissed her mother on the cheek. “I missed you, mom.”
Viv smiled, grabbing her keys out of her purse. “I missed you too, baby.”
–
Anna spent the next hour frantically cleaning despite knowing Viv had probably already snooped quite extensively before she even got home. Viv had always been a stickler for having a clean household and nothing, not even her perfectly manicured nails, got in the way of that.
She shuffled paperwork into the drawers in the cabinet where she had moved all of Mam’s knick-knacks. She looked curiously down when a slip of color caught her eye. She pulled the shiny paper out, realizing it was a photograph.
It was a bright picture of Mam in a hospital bed. She had a strange light blue hospital gown on and white sheets pulled up to her waist. Mam had been a very slight woman, short and small-boned with strong muscles. The bed looked like it was swallowing her up. Anna looked at her face, fine lines next to her hazel eyes and her short cropped brown hair. Then she noticed Mam’s arms cradled in front of her. Holding a baby. A newborn baby. Mam had just had a baby in the picture, she realized with a start.
Mam had been a mother? What had happened to the baby? Why hadn’t anyone told her about it?
Anna heard her mother’s car in the driveway and stuffed the picture back into the drawer.
She let herself out into the backyard, flicking on the sprinklers and walking around. There wasn’t much weeding to be done, but she grabbed her small gardening scissors and went about snipping off the herbs that were ready to be harvested and laying them carefully in a basket she hung from her arm.
After stringing up and hanging some of the plants and preparing some to freeze, she made her way into the house. Viv was standing on top of a chair in her high heels, the contents of her cabinets spread across the counter as she scrubbed the insides.
Anna smiled, shaking her head. She opened the fridge to grab the pitcher of water and found every shelf inside overflowing with fruits, vegetables, tofu and hummus. “Thank you, mom,” she said, wondering if she lived closer if Viv would randomly show up with bags of groceries every week to make sure she was eating well.
&n
bsp; Viv made a sound in her throat. “I’m gonna make us a big, healthy dinner tonight. If you don’t have plans with your man, that is,” she added in a tone that implied she wouldn’t mind if she did.
“No,” Anna said to her back. “No plans.”
“Good,” Viv said, moving on to the next cabinet. “Now go wash up and put something nice on. I wont have you sitting down to eat all sweaty and gross.”
Dinner would be served at six sharp. Her mother had very definite ideas about proper meal times. Four hours before bed, so your body had time to digest before sleep. Apparently it was good for keeping your weight down or some nonsense that Anna wasn’t sure she believed.
She hemmed and hawed over her wardrobe while Viv banged and chopped around in the kitchen. Eventually she slipped on a deep purple and white sundress and made her way out to ask her mother if she needed any help.
She had barely stepped into the room when Sam showed up outside the back door. “Oh no,” she said quietly.
Viv’s head jerked up, looking over and smiling. “Annabelle it looks like you have a gentleman caller. Ask him if he would like to stay for dinner.” As Anna walked past her, Viv leaned closer. “He’s very handsome,” she said and Anna shook her head, shuffling outside.
She almost barreled into Sam, slamming her palm against his chest and pushing him off the porch, moving until they were out of sight of the kitchen. She knew Viv would be peeking out.
“What is going on?” Sam asked, his eyebrows drawing together.
“My mother dropped in for a visit,” she said, looking over her shoulder.
Realization dawned on him. “When did she get here?”
“Oh I dunno. But she was here when I got back this morning, waiting for me.”
“Oops,” Sam said, smiling and running a hand through his hair.
“Oh no no,” Anna said quickly. “she’s glad I’m having sex.”
What The Heart Wants Page 17
