“Stop crying. We couldn’t stay.” Lloyd gripped the steering wheel and leaned into it like a race-car driver.
After we’d gotten back onto the freeway he said, “How about we stop for doughnuts, huh? Krispy Kreme opens at three a.m.”
“I’m not hungry!” I yelled. “We have to go back for Mom.”
I cried until my throat hurt. Then Lloyd finally held my hand.
“If we stayed at the hospital, they would have said your mom was not a good mom and then the police would come and take you away from us. You want that to happen?”
“She is a good mom,” I said.
“Not tonight,” he whispered.
“I want to see her.” I kicked my feet against the dashboard.
“She’ll probably be home tomorrow or the next day,” he said. “They just need to make her well.”
I wanted to cry again.
“Can I please stay at Rosa’s?”
Lloyd didn’t look at me. “Your mom and I are getting married soon. I’ll take care of you.”
“I want Rosa.”
“Well, you’re staying with me.”
“I don’t want you,” I said.
Lloyd never answered. He pulled the car into the apartment parking lot and into our regular space, which was still empty. I jumped out and began looking for my lost slipper while Lloyd went back inside.
“Lock the door when you’re done,” he said.
CHAPTER 28
Frank seemed an inanimate extension of the machines and wires anchoring him to the hospital bed. It’d been an hour since they moved him from the ER to the intensive care unit. His bandaged head immobile, my uncle lay completely still except for the subtle rise and fall of his barrel chest beneath the hospital gown.
“There’s swelling in his brain.” A nurse adjusted the IV protruding from Frank’s forearm. Her name tag said Amy. “He’s stable but needs rest.”
She touched my shoulder briefly before leaving me and Mo alone.
“Lloyd did this. I know he did.” I held Frank’s calloused hand, its strength apparent even in this frozen state.
Lloyd had gotten close enough to Mo to steal her phone. And he’d knocked Frank out with a two-by-four piece of lumber at the construction site. No one else had a reason to hurt Frank. Not one goddamn neighbor saw a thing. The city’s permit officer had found Frank and the bloody piece of wood on a visit to check the progress of the house. Thank God for that.
“Cody … he’s in danger too. I have to tell someone.” I jumped from the chair and headed for the door where a police officer stood guard.
Mo stopped me and led me back to the chair. “You don’t even know if your stepfather’s seen you with Cody, but I called James. Cody’s with him. He’s safe.”
I turned to the window. The glare of the hospital-room lights made it impossible to see into the dark night. I only saw my reflection and that of Frank in the bed. Until another reflection appeared behind me: Detective Monroe.
Heartbreak had a physical pain to it. “What did you do, Mo?”
“What I should have done earlier,” she said.
“Miss Betts, would you join me?” The detective motioned to the hallway. “I have some questions for you.”
Mo moved closer to Frank but didn’t look me in the eye. I followed Monroe down the hall to a small waiting room. We were alone.
“Your friend said your stepfather confronted you this morning. You should have said something at the high school.” He took out a small notepad.
“I had other things on my mind. Like my uncle almost being killed.”
“She thinks you’re cooking up a scheme to deal with your stepfather yourself. Is that correct?”
My best friend had crossed a line. It was one thing to be worried about me. It was another completely to blindside me like this. By telling the police about Lloyd, she’d stolen any chance I had to think things through.
“I’ve had a pretty rough day,” I said. “I haven’t been thinking straight.”
“That’s understandable,” Monroe said. “So let’s start from the beginning. Tell me everything you remember. Don’t leave out a thing.”
I didn’t admit Lloyd had stolen Mo’s phone. I lied and said he had been waiting for me at the trolley stop. The phone was my only means of contacting Lloyd, and I didn’t want to risk the police tracing it. Thank God I hadn’t trusted Mo with that bit of information.
“Some druggie my mom knew ran into Lloyd in Albuquerque. He told my stepfather we lived in Durango,” I said. “He knew she’d died.”
“And did he tell you what he wants? Do you have idea why he’d attack your uncle?”
I told him Lloyd wanted me to steal money from Frank, but that I didn’t know why he went after Frank so quickly. I was anxious to find that out myself.
“He was high. He wasn’t making a lot of sense,” I said. “I told him I would figure something out.”
“That wasn’t very bright,” Monroe said.
“I was stalling. To keep him away from Frank and Mo.”
Detective Monroe closed his notepad and cracked his knuckles as if dealing with me made him beyond exhausted. His reproachful stare made me even more uncomfortable.
“What do you want from me? I’m telling you everything now.”
“I want you to take this seriously,” he said.
He had no idea how seriously I was taking it. I’d make Lloyd pay for hurting Frank, for coming back into my life.
“Well, at least we know why he’s in Durango,” he said. “We’ll get a description out to the police and the sheriff’s department. After you say good-bye to your uncle, an officer will take you to the Mooneys’ residence.”
I rushed back into the hospital room. I had no intention of leaving Frank’s side. And I definitely wasn’t going anywhere with Mo.
I leaned over the side of the bed and laid my cheek against Frank’s chest. The rhythmic pounding could almost drown out the beeping machines. By closing my eyes, I shut out the sterile, gray hospital room and the slackness in his features. I imagined him standing in the trailer’s kitchen with his stupid apron on, cooking dinner and teasing me about Cody.
“The doctors are doing all they can,” Mo said.
“Why don’t you just leave?” My friend had betrayed me and I didn’t need her to comfort me.
“We’re both leaving. The police are taking us back to my house. You can be as mad as you want. I told you I’d do anything to protect you.”
I stepped away from Frank and leaned against the cabinets near the bed. I needed water and food, but I couldn’t focus enough to make any decision. Even breathing felt like a chore.
“I don’t need you to protect me.” I rubbed my temples to stop the throbbing.
“Then I’m protecting myself,” she said. “I want you around. I want Frank around. In the last few weeks you’ve been different … happy. I want that back, for both of us.”
My brain had no room for Mo’s excuses. Instead it niggled at all that had transpired since Lloyd had made his demands. Why hadn’t he texted?
“He didn’t even give me a chance,” I said more to myself than to Mo.
“Who?”
“Lloyd. He went after Frank almost immediately.”
“You’re questioning the logic of a drug dealer? Did you think he’d keep his word?”
“I could have fixed this if you hadn’t messed things up,” I said.
“Me? You think I messed things up?” Mo’s chest heaved as if she would explode. “I’m so tired of your bullshit. Face it, Arlie. You’re the reason Frank’s here.”
“Get the fuck out!” I yelled at her.
“You keep forgetting you’re sixteen years old,” she shot back. “You’ve handled things on your own for so long that you’ve lost a grip on reality. You can’t fix this.”
Her shrill voice carried through the glass wall and to the nurses’ station. It wasn’t two seconds before the officer on duty and nurse Amy burst into the room.
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“Be quiet this instant or you’re both out of here, do you understand?” Amy’s harsh command hung between us.
The officer surveyed the scene, tugged at his collar, and exited as fast as he could. The door clicked behind him.
Like a mother hen, the nurse pulled us toward her and into a huddle of exhausted emotion. “Girls, you’ve got to respect that this is a hospital and this is the ICU. People are seriously ill. You can’t raise your voices.”
Amy released us and softened her tone. “You’ve got five minutes and then you’ll have to go. Understand?”
I broke away from her and went to Frank’s side. He lay so still that I couldn’t help but think of him as lifeless. The image of another funeral drove spikes of panic into my heart.
“Arlie … if anything happens … you know, to Frank …”
“No. Don’t say it. You can’t say it.”
Frank couldn’t leave me too. It just wasn’t possible. He had to wake up. He had to finish our house.
“Your stepdad is unstable. What makes you think he won’t kill you when he finds out you can’t get him the money? Arlie? Are you listening to me?” Pale and exhausted, Mo no longer raised her voice. She’d sensed I’d shut myself off.
I hugged my uncle and stood up. “I need to use the restroom and splash some water on my face. Then we can leave.”
Mo nodded and went out into the hallway, giving me the chance to contact Lloyd.
I lowered the lid of the toilet and sat down. Don’t make him mad, Arlie. Remain calm. My shaking hands almost made it impossible to tap out a message.
I thought I had more time. Why’d you hurt Frank? I typed.
When my cell phone rang, I fumbled for it and lost my grip, sending it bouncing onto the tile, screen side up. Mo’s name and number appeared.
“You could’ve killed Frank, you bastard.” So much for remaining calm and not pissing him off.
“I followed you after breakfast. You went straight to the motel, then to your uncle. I saw you outside the school.”
“But I didn’t tell them anything.” I whispered in case Mo came back into the room. “They were worried that I hadn’t shown up to school. Everyone is being extra careful now that—”
“That I’m in town.”
“We could still meet.” Detective Monroe’s warnings tapped at my consciousness, but all I could think about was the chance to see Lloyd.
“You said you couldn’t get the money.”
“I lied before. I can get some. Maybe not fifty thousand, but—Frank keeps a little in the trailer. And I can get more from Mo’s parents.”
“You’re a lying bitch, just like your mother,” he said.
I bit back my anger. I couldn’t risk scaring him off. “Just meet me at the trailer. Two a.m. I promise to be alone.”
The line went dead. I could only pray he’d show up.
Warm lights illuminated Mo’s house, the glow of family and safety and normalcy pouring from the multipaned windows. Two police cars on the street in front shattered the idyllic scene and reminded me I was essentially under house arrest.
Mo walked up the sidewalk to her front porch and I followed close behind. “Mom’s cooked supper. Cody and James are here too.”
“Why are they here?” I pulled on Mo’s arm to stop her.
“I told them what happened. They wanted to see you.”
“And your parents?”
“I told them everything too.”
My legs grew weak and I grabbed for the porch railing. Mo didn’t wait for me to object or complain. Instead, she walked into her house, assuming I’d follow. So I did.
As soon as we entered the kitchen, Mo’s mom pulled me into a hug and kissed the top of my head. Without thinking, I wrapped my arms even tighter around her waist. During the whole day, no one else had offered any comfort or understanding, and my frayed nerves welcomed the soothing she provided.
Mo’s dad stood in the doorway to the dining room, a beer bottle in his hand. When I caught his eye, he turned and left.
I expected a hug from Cody, but he sat down with the others. I took the chair next to him.
“Cody?” My voice shook. I didn’t know the extent of the harm I’d done to us. I squeezed his hand, but he barely squeezed back.
“I’m glad you’re okay, but let’s just eat.”
“Cody’s right. I’m sure Mo and Arlie are starved,” Mrs. Mooney said. “They’ve been at the hospital most of the day.” Mrs. Mooney reached for plates in the cabinet and filled them for us.
After not eating or drinking all day, I was grateful for the warm meal and gave it my entire attention. Everyone else picked at their food and said little except to ask for more bread or tea.
“So we’re going to pretend this is some normal get-together?” James let his fork drop to his plate, which caused both me and Cody to jump.
“Cool it, James,” Cody said. “We can talk later.”
“Actually, no, we can’t.” James stood and laid his napkin across his plate. “We’re leaving now.”
Mrs. Mooney jumped from her seat. “Please, let’s stay calm. Arlie’s been through enough for one day.”
“Oh, she has, has she?”
James’s anger shouldn’t have surprised me, but I found myself shaking, barely able to keep it together. I felt cornered and utterly alone.
“Hey, man, lay off,” Cody said. “We’re all tired. We’re all worried. Blaming Arlie right now won’t solve anything.”
Even though Cody came to my defense, his tone suggested a distance that would be difficult to bridge, at least tonight.
“I’m sorry—” I began.
“You should be,” James said, sitting down.
“Let her finish,” Mo interrupted.
More than anything, I wanted to apologize for thinking I could be part of their normal lives. I was the square peg that’d never fit, no matter how hard I tried.
“Why didn’t you let us help you?” Cody’s tone had softened, but hurt punctuated every word. When he finally leaned in to hug me, I’d never been so grateful.
“He told me not to say anything. I needed time to think of a plan. I was trying to protect you. All of you.” I buried my face in the nap of his flannel shirt.
“And yet your uncle is in the ICU.” Mr. Mooney had come back to the kitchen without me noticing.
“Rob, that’s uncalled for,” Mrs. Mooney said. “She’s just a girl.”
“He’s right. This is all my fault.” I pushed away from the table and ran up the stairs, two at a time, until I reached the hall bathroom. I slammed the door and locked it. Slumping down, I wedged my back against the vanity. The chill in the tile floor seeped into my jeans.
Thankfully, no one followed. I sucked in air, but my lungs refused it. Everyone downstairs expected me to do the “right” thing—let the police find Lloyd, arrest Lloyd, punish Lloyd. Emotions ran high. They were all angry that I hadn’t gone straight to the detective as soon as I left the restaurant this morning.
How could I explain my fear that Lloyd would slip through the cracks once again, only to resurface later? I couldn’t imagine how we’d live day to day. No one could protect us twenty-four seven. Frank was proof of that. And Mr. Mooney was right. I was to blame.
I heard Mo leading Cody up the stairs before I heard a faint knock on the bathroom door.
“Let me in. Please.”
From my sitting position, I leaned over and unlocked the door. Cody motioned for Mo to leave us alone and then closed the door behind him.
“I’m on the floor. Here, take my hand,” I said.
Cody dropped to his knees, his hands outstretched to determine which direction I faced. He sat down, legs crossed and facing me.
“I didn’t mean to upset you. Any of you,” I said. “My decisions had nothing to do with you.”
“Do you know how awful it’d be to lose you?” he asked. “And your actions do affect me. Because we’re together now.”
With his hea
d bowed slightly, his hair fell in a blond curtain, shielding his eyes. I brushed it out of the way, only to have it fall again. So I grabbed his chin and lifted it up so that I could see his whole face. I ran a finger over his bottom lip and he drew it in.
“Don’t,” he whispered. “We should go downstairs.”
I placed my hands on his cheeks. “You’re beautiful, Cody. Inside and out. I don’t deserve you.”
“Arlie—”
“Shhh.” I kissed him softly. He kissed me back, gently at first, then more forcefully. His tongue darted around mine. I didn’t think I could kiss him hard enough to show how much I wanted him.
My fingers fumbled at the buttons on his flannel shirt. He brushed them away with a quiet “no” but kissed me hungrily. I kept at the buttons until I could push the shirt off his shoulders. He struggled to free his arms so I pulled on the sleeves until the shirt came free. He grabbed my T-shirt and lifted it over my head. Goose bumps dotted my skin as Cody pushed me against the cold tile floor, the clasp of my bra digging into my back. His chest was blistering hot against my skin. He leaned on one elbow, keeping his full weight off me.
“We can’t do this now, here.” His breath tickled my ear. “With everyone downstairs.”
“I don’t care.” I groped at the zipper on his jeans. I felt he wanted me as much as I wanted him.
“Not like this.” He pushed off me and sat with his back against the bathroom door. The distance between us felt enormous. He ran both hands through his hair and closed his eyes.
Embarrassed at what I’d started, I pulled on my T-shirt, but felt chilled through and through.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“Don’t be. I don’t know what I was thinking.” But I had known. Lloyd represented death and I wanted to feel alive, supercharged in every cell of my body. To drink every last drop of what Cody represented: love and hope and normalcy.
“I wanted to,” he said. “I did.”
“You don’t have to say that.”
He pulled on his shirt, but didn’t button it. He helped me to my knees and held on to me as if there was a chance I’d disappear forever. Cody spoke directly in my ear.
“I haven’t done this with anyone. I want it to be right.”
Burn Girl Page 19
