by Sharon Hinck
“The healer is patching up Tristan,” I explained.
Wade chuckled as he ducked back out.
Later, the healer examined me and seemed as worried as she had been earlier. She gave me a bag of herbs and explained how to brew them and how much to drink each day. Kieran got a scolding for picking up a nasty clay-field fever and not taking care of it sooner. She slapped a drug patch on his arm and told him to rest and drink plenty of water. Mark rolled some pallets out on the common room floor for Tristan and Kieran. With assassins still on the loose, we were safer sticking together. Tristan planned to relieve Wade on watch halfway through the night, but Kieran wouldn’t be any help. As soon as the healer helped him to the pallet, he stretched out and fell asleep.
Linette had started an evening meal earlier. There was a pot of vegetable stew simmering on a heat trivet. Mark and I brought that out, along with anything else edible we could find in the kitchen cubby. I didn’t have much appetite, but Wade and Tristan ate everything on the table. Even Mark dug in. He must have found comfort in the flavors from his childhood. It had been twenty years since he’d had some of these vegetables and spices.
Tristan nudged Kieran with his foot. “You want something to eat?”
Kieran didn’t move. He was out cold. In sleep, all the hard lines of his face had relaxed. With his cheeks flushed from the fever and his mouth partway open, he looked much younger. He reminded me of Nolan. I wondered briefly how the young messenger was adjusting to life in Tara’s home, before I tuned back in to the conversation around the table.
“You’ll need his protection,” Tristan was saying.
“No, I’d rather send him with Susan,” Mark said. Wade’s chest was puffed out with pride.
They were debating where to send our house protector. “Mark, keep Wade here with you.” I reached for my husband’s hand. “The assassins are still out there, and I don’t trust the Council Guard to be much help.”
Tristan leaned forward and looked straight into Mark’s eyes. “I owe her my life. She brought Kendra back. You know what that means to me. I promise you, I’ll protect her.”
“Your vow?” Mark asked. The intensity in the faces of both men reminded me again of how important words were in this land.
“With my life.”
Mark studied Tristan’s face. I could follow his thoughts. Tristan loved his wife so much that watching Kendra suffer had caused a visceral response. It overpowered his training, his duty, and his other loyalties. He knew exactly what Mark was facing in letting me go to this war. He also knew what it would cost his people if I didn’t. So did Mark.
“All right.” Mark slumped back into his chair. I knew he was agreeing to more than keeping Wade with him in Lyric.
I began gathering up the dishes. “When will we head back to Braide Wood?” I wanted to meet the eldest songkeeper of Lyric, who had sent Mark through the portal. I wanted to spend time with Mark in his favorite grove outside the city. When Tristan didn’t answer right away, I looked up from the bowls I was stacking.
Tristan looked at Mark as he spoke. “Tomorrow,” he said quietly. “First light.”
Mark squeezed his eyes shut.
Chapter
30
“I can’t do this. I want to go home.” I moaned the words into Mark’s shoulder.
It was just past first light, and the morning air was cold. A low fog muted the edges of the trees and gave the impression that all existence ended fifty yards out in any direction. The Lyric station was empty except for Tristan, Kieran, Linette, and Wade. A sleek transport was parked along the road, engine off. Mark and I had walked a distance away from the others to say our goodbyes.
We had spent the night in each other’s arms, talking, praying, and sometimes dozing for short stretches of time.
He squeezed me now, and his chest moved as he chuckled. “You’re right. You did sound like this each time you went into labor.” He cupped my chin in one hand and tilted my head up. “Remember? When you can’t go back, you go forward. The One . . .” He swallowed. “The One will protect you. You can do this.”
“I’ll try.” I wanted to be brave for him, but it took all my strength not to grab him and beg him to come with me. Part of me wanted to suggest that we forget about honor and duty and go back through the portal and leave this strange world to its own problems.
Mark kept staring into my eyes. “Susan . . . thank you for what you’re doing for my people.”
“Our people.”
He kissed me, and I breathed in the smell of his skin. I soaked in strength from the feeling of his arms around me. Then we heard the hum of an engine powering up. The transport doors slid upward into the curved roof with a whoosh.
He pulled his head back. “Have you got the herbs from the healer?” He smoothed a strand of my hair back and tucked it behind my ear.
“Yes, and I promise I’ll stop in and see the Braide Wood healer, too.”
“Here.” He pressed a folded fabric square into my hands.
“What’s this?” I shook it open and discovered an appliqué of a blue-gray waterfall tumbling over rocks.
“It’s the Rendor clan emblem. To wear into battle. Be careful.”
I squeezed the fabric against my chest. “I will. You too. Keep Wade close.”
“Don’t worry. The Council Guard will find out what the Kahlareans have planned. It’s good we caught one of them alive. I don’t think they’ll try again soon.” Mark was deliberately infusing confidence into his voice, but I was grateful.
Over at the transport, Wade had already helped Linette to board, and Kieran was following.
“Susan, stay away from Kieran,” Mark said in a low voice. “I don’t trust him.”
I sighed. “You worry too much.”
Tristan and Wade stood by the transport door and waited for us. We walked toward them, my dread growing with each step. It was easy to assert that I needed to follow my calling. It was much harder to step out of Mark’s arms and onto the transport that would carry me to war.
Wade rubbed his hands up and down his arms to warm them in the chill air while shifting his weight from side to side. I was glad he would be staying with Mark. He may be just an overgrown boy, but he was completely trustworthy and fiercely determined to help.
“Wade, please take care of him.”
His jovial face sobered. “You have my word.”
Mark and I stood in front of the transport door. “I love you,” I whispered.
He hugged me one last time, hard. “I love you, too. Go with the One.”
I boarded and sat beside Linette. Mark and Tristan exchanged a few words, and then Tristan stepped into the car, allowing the curved door to slide downward. The transport surged forward, pulling me away from Mark. I looked out the window. He stood, chin raised, with Wade behind him. I watched them until we crested a hill and the Lyric station disappeared into the fog.
It took a moment to swallow the fear and loneliness that I tasted. Then I turned to Linette. “How are you?”
She was staring out the window, but pulled her gaze away and looked at me. Her eyes were red and swollen in her pale face, and even when she answered me, part of her wasn’t really there. “I’m all right. I want to be home.”
I nodded. Her family in Braide Wood would be able to bring her some comfort. Her gaze shifted back out the window. She had gone inside herself somewhere, her withdrawal reminding me of the effects of Rhusican poison. But reciting Verses wouldn’t make this go away. This was pure grief.
Tristan rose from his seat to scan the road ahead of us. He sat down again, but a few minutes later he was back on his feet.
Kieran watched him and smirked. “The transport won’t go any faster if you’re standing.” The full night’s sleep and the healer’s drug patch had helped him. His eyes were no longer glazed, and even though he sprawled acr
oss the bench, there was tightly wound energy in his muscles again.
Tristan looked over his shoulder at Kieran and his focus latched onto the Hazor emblem still attached to the front of Kieran’s tunic. “Get rid of that thing.”
Kieran shrugged and pulled out his dagger to slice the threads holding it in place. “I’m only coming with you because I want to see Kendra for myself.” He cut the bottom stitches free.
“You’re coming with me because I need help planning our defense against Hazor,” Tristan said, turning to look out the window again.
Kieran ignored him and tried to line his blade up to cut the top threads of the emblem. He was looking down, cross-eyed, but obviously couldn’t see what he was doing.
“Here, let me help.” I leaned across the aisle and reached for his dagger.
He looked at me and then at the blade he was holding just under his own throat. “Oh, I don’t think so.” He put away his knife and ripped the emblem off the rest of the way.
I sat back and glared at him. “You give new definition to the word paranoid.”
He bunched up the fabric emblem and stuffed it into his pack. “It’s worked for me so far.”
My irritation at him took the edge off the ache I’d been feeling. Good. I’d concentrate on being annoyed instead of lonely and afraid.
We reached Tristan’s house around lunchtime. It felt like déjà vu as the door flew open and Tara ran out. Today, instead of rushing toward Tristan, she stepped aside. Kendra catapulted from the house and into Tristan’s arms. It took her several seconds to notice Kieran and me standing nearby.
“Kieran? Oh thank the One.” She threw her arms around him.
He returned her hug and then grabbed her shoulders and held her at arm’s length, searching her face. “Are you really back?”
I looked back and forth between them and smiled. I could see the family resemblance in the black hair, dark eyes, and angular cheekbones. Looking at his sister, Kieran’s face lost some of its perpetual cynicism. His grin was a mirror of hers.
Tara circled around them to come and greet me. “Are you all right? I was so worried when Tristan told me the Council Guard had taken you.”
I blinked several times, my eyes stinging with the threat of tears. When I left, I hadn’t known if I’d ever see her again. It felt so good to be back.
She must have realized that her compassionate welcome was about to do me in. She changed her tone. “Come on, everyone. Don’t let gnats in the house. I was just starting lunch.”
I followed her through the doorway with a sense of coming home.
Nolan sat at the table with Dustin and Aubrey, playing a game involving black and white stones. The bruises on his face had faded. He looked up and blanched as Tristan and Kieran followed me into the room. Tara quickly went to stand by him and laid a quieting hand on Nolan’s shoulder. “You three go get washed up. It’s almost lunch time.”
Dustin and Aubrey gave Tristan a quick hug and disappeared down the hallway. Nolan followed them, glancing over his shoulder with a worried frown.
“That’s the messenger from Hazor?” Kieran asked Tristan. “And you kept him alive. You’re getting smarter. We can use him.”
Kendra slugged her brother in the arm hard enough to make him stagger. “Don’t you touch him.”
Her prickly defense of Nolan and her ability to keep Kieran in his place made me smile.
“Kendra, don’t be an idiot.” Kieran tossed his pack to her. “They’ve declared war. We’ll do whatever we have to.”
Tristan put an arm around his wife. “She knows that. Let’s not talk about this right now.”
Kendra glanced at me and I nodded. Between the two of us, we’d look out for Nolan.
Tristan pulled Kendra closer and looked around the crowded room. Large family groups made a private reunion difficult, and they’d had almost no time together since her healing. “We’ll be back soon,” Tristan told his mother abruptly. “Don’t wait on us for lunch.” He grabbed Kendra’s hand and hurried her out the front door.
“Strange time to go for a walk,” Kieran said dryly. “I thought he was hungry.”
Insensitive clod. I ignored him and sighed, half in appreciation of Tristan and Kendra’s regained romance, half in response to the ache I felt for Mark’s arms right now. Was he already meeting with councilmembers to procure supplies? Was Wade sticking close to protect him?
“Pining for your Rendor bureaucrat?” Kieran murmured by my ear. He’d slipped up behind me while I stood lost in thought.
“That,” I said, rounding on him, “is none of your business.” I stalked away to help Tara get lunch finished, but his low chuckle followed me. Tara took her time adding more ingredients to the large bowl of stew simmering on a heat trivet, and I told her about the drama in the Council meeting. We managed to stall lunch for nearly an hour until Kendra and Tristan returned. Kendra’s skin was flushed from whisker burn, and Tristan sauntered across the great room with almost no limp, clearly in a much better mood.
I made a point of sitting beside Nolan. In spite of that, the boy didn’t eat anything. I tried to talk to him, but he answered me with shrugs and monosyllables. If he’d started to relax under Tara’s care, Tristan’s return had ruined that progress.
“Where’s Gareth?” Tristan asked his mother.
“He and Talia joined a party from Blue Knoll to head out and do some hunting. We need something to get us through next season.” Tara stood up to refill the water pitcher, and Tristan followed her to the kitchen alcove.
“He’s supposed to be guarding Nolan,” Tristan said, rubbing his forehead, as if a headache were blooming.
I watched them huddle in conversation and hoped that it was only my keen hearing that allowed me to follow. Nolan already looked miserable slouched beside me.
Tara’s smile made her look like an imp in a grandmother’s body. “Finding food is more important. And do you really think Kendra and I can’t handle one skinny teenage boy?” She patted her belt. She was wearing a dagger—small and ornate, but definitely a weapon. Tristan sighed and let the subject drop as they returned to the table.
After lunch, Dustin, Aubrey, and Nolan settled in the corner of the room with their game.
Tristan and Kendra sat together at the table, oblivious as Tara and I moved around them to clear away the dishes. They carried on a quiet conversation with small movements that looked like a dance. She smoothed the shoulder seam of his tunic. He traced circles on the back of her hand. She rubbed away a streak of dirt from his cheek. He touched her hair. Tara grinned at me and shook her head. Kieran sat across the table from them. I waited for a sarcastic comment from him, but he just watched Kendra, relaxed and content.
“I was planning to visit father this afternoon,” Kendra said, picking lint from the sleeve of Tristan’s tunic. “But I could do it another day.”
“Go ahead.” Tristan’s voice lowered in volume, and he glanced at Nolan to be sure the boy was still immersed in his game with the children. “I need to check in with the replacement captain and start making plans for the other clan guardians. They’ll start arriving soon. But I’ll be home before nightfall.” They smiled at each other.
Kendra glanced across the table at Kieran. “You can come with me. Father would—”
“No.” Kieran pushed his chair back and stood. His face hardened.
“It would do him good. He misses you. I know you want to see him.”
Kieran shoved his empty chair under the table with unnecessary force, making his sister jump. “I said, no.”
Tristan rested his elbows on the table to lean forward and glare at his friend. But when he spoke, his voice was gentle. “We need Skyler’s help. I know how you feel. But we’re going to need him. Please talk to him.”
Kieran paced away, then turned and looked at Kendra and Tristan. “Later. Maybe. Not to
day.”
Tristan nodded. The couple rose from their chairs and Kendra left Tristan’s side to circle the table and give her brother a hug. “I’ll tell him you’re back. Maybe we can visit him together tomorrow.”
He shook his head and turned away.
Tara brought a basket covered with cloth out to Kendra. “The stew’s still hot, and I made him some of the caradoc rolls he likes.”
“Thank you.” Kendra gave Tristan one more kiss and left. Tara grabbed her cloak and called to Nolan and her grandchildren.
“Where are you going?” Tristan asked her. His cheerful mood had traveled right out the door with Kendra.
“The little ones are helping me find berries,” Tara said, as Dustin and Aubrey ran past her son and outside.
Nolan followed the children, but Tristan’s hand shot out and grabbed him by the arm. “Not him. I need to talk to him,” Tristan said. Then he noticed me hovering by the kitchen. “Susan can go with you.”
“I don’t think so.” I crossed my arms. “I’m staying right here.”
“You had better leave for a while.” Tristan’s face was unreadable.
My stomach tightened. Whatever he and Kieran were planning, I had no intention of leaving them alone with Nolan. “I’m not going anywhere.” I leaned against the entry into the kitchen alcove.
Tara smiled at me and followed her grandchildren out the door. As soon as the door shut, Tristan shoved Nolan into a chair.
“Hey.” I stepped forward.
Tristan stopped me with a stony glare. “If you want to stay, then sit down and don’t say anything.” His harsh tone startled me.
“But he’s willing to talk to you. He answered every question I asked him.”
“We’ll see.” Kieran pulled up a chair across from Nolan.
Worried by the hard resolve in both men, I took another step closer.
“Don’t interfere,” Tristan warned. “If you don’t have the stomach for this, get out.”
I stumbled a few steps back and perched on the edge of the table, planning every scathing word I would say to him later. Since I didn’t want to leave Nolan alone with these two, I kept my mouth shut.
