“You look so pretty lately. Ever since we got here. You’re not working all the time and a little adventure looks good on you.”
I’d been feeling better, too. I hadn’t realized the toll working nonstop and a failing marriage had taken on me, until I started the recovery process. “Thank you.”
“You're welcome.” She gave me a goofy grin. “So, what happened with you and Dad in the first place? All I’ve ever known is that you don’t like each other. And when I ask, you both tell me how awful the other one is. But you had to like each other at least a little bit.”
“We did.” I closed my eyes as Fiona worked on my shadow, and memories of my time with Landon flickered like an old home movie. “Once upon a time, I was just like you. Living for the moment and taking every opportunity that was presented to me. Your dad and I met at a party. I beat him at a game of strip poker. He’s pretty competitive, but so am I. We kept challenging each other, because neither of us could say no. But once you came along, I wasn’t willing to compromise on my dreams, and neither was he. We thought we were doing you dirty, as you put it, if we settled down. Not being able to convince the other one to do what we wanted felt like a failure. That’s when the fighting started. We were both selfish.”
“I love that story.” She bit her lip, and I feared she was putting together an all-new strip poker strategy. “And maybe it means that I’ll wind up being just like you.”
Her cheeks flushed at her declaration and my heart swelled. “Never thought that would be one of your goals.”
“I mean it. You’re a badass, Mom. Give yourself some credit. You owned an awesome restaurant, you don’t take shit from anyone, and you made me.” She laughed. “Personally, I think you can do way better than Dad or Charlie. You deserve someone who worships the ground you walk on.”
“That’s not reality.”
She frowned. “Why not?”
“Because no one is perfect.” When I was her age, I had no problem abandoning anyone who didn’t meet my ideals. I got frustrated and lonely fast. When I met Charlie, I thought it was enough that he shared my business vision. I overlooked the fact that he was never a dad to my little girl.
“I never said anything about perfect. I said they should worship the ground you walk on.” Fiona took a step back and admired her work. She nodded and gestured for me to look in the mirror. “What do you think?”
She didn’t do me dirty at all. She was right. I looked better than I had in a long time. Well-rested, healthy, and hopeful. “I think I’m ready for my date.”
“Don’t settle for Dad.” She offered me a hand and pulled me up. “Make him work for it. If you want, I can teach you a thing or two.”
Stifling my laugh was impossible. “That won’t be necessary.”
“Okay.” She sang the word. “But promise me one thing.”
“What’s that?” I’d do almost anything not to take relationship advice from my barely eighteen-year-old daughter.
“After you cook Dad this dinner tonight, make him come to you. Like, come back here tonight, tomorrow—whatever—and make sure he’s thinking of nothing else but you. Put the ball in his court and let him make the next move.”
My daughter saw through the bullshit that I was here only on her behalf. She knew I had skin in the game, too. It was risky advice. Landon had no problem walking away from me once. It was possible I was the one who made the first move to leave, but he didn’t chase me back then.
This time felt different, although it was possible I was confusing hope with comfort. But if I’d learned anything since the last time Landon Fox had been a major player in my life, it was that the biggest risks were the most rewarding.
“Are you ready for your date?” Molly asked when we went downstairs. “You’ve been cooking all day. It smells like heaven in here. I wish I got to eat some of that.”
Fiona and I shared a condo with four other Werewife hopefuls, and all of them had wanted to know how I’d achieved the impossible. At first I thought they were interested in my old restaurant. I’d opened Bella at the very beginning of the farm to table movement. I always loved the idea of using what we had available locally to make unique dishes.
The ladies were interested in the food, but they were much more interested in my ex. In their opinion, Landon wasn’t giving the Werewives the love they deserved, and they wanted to know my secret. Honestly, it wasn’t much different than my business philosophy.
“Food is love,” I said, making a note to cook dinner for my new roommates. “And not in the ‘sit in front of the TV and eat a box of gross donuts’ kind of way. Your health and well-being depends on what you put in your body. So if you take the time to make someone a thoughtful meal with beautiful ingredients that mean something to you, you’re taking care of them. You’re telling them that they matter because your food will make them feel good.”
“I can barely cook,” Molly confessed. “I’m so nervous on dates I’d be afraid to burn the house down.”
“You can make dishes in advance, like I am now, and just put the finishing touches on them before you’re ready to eat. Maybe in the offseason, you and your guy can take cooking classes together.”
Her face lit up. “Can you teach them?”
“Maybe.” I’d trained hundreds of employees, gone on TV long before I became a Werewife, but I’d never given classes. I didn’t hate the idea. If food truly was love, I was selfish not to share what I knew. There were no secrets in cooking. Everyone put their own spin on each dish.
Production assistants had transferred the food I prepped from our condo to Landon’s house. And for the first time in a long time, I was nervous about making a meal for someone. It wasn’t often that I sat with the people I cooked for as they ate. All I had to know about them was what they wanted for dinner, not what else they loved. And all they knew about me was that I made the meal.
The cameras were already set up when I got to Landon’s condo. Tessa waved to me when I came in. This was my first solo appearance on The Real Werewives, and in the post-auction whirlwind, I realized I had no idea what I was supposed to do.
“You look great, Jenna,” she said as she gave me a hug.
“Sorry about last night.” I had a feeling I’d spend a lot of my time on the show apologizing for Fiona’s antics. “Fiona has a mind of her own.”
Tessa narrowed her eyebrows at me. “Oh, the thing with Fiona? Not a big deal. We’ve seen some crazy tactics to get the Bloodhounds’ attention since we started the show.”
“I bet,” I groaned. “Just what my kid needs. Inspiration.”
“Don’t worry about Fiona tonight. Concentrate on your date. We’ll talk about her later.”
In five more days, I had no say in the matter. “Her birthday is next week.”
“I know.” Tessa fought her grin. “She’s already sent in an application for the show. I don’t have final say over who gets picked, but I have to tell you, she’s a strong candidate for the same reason you are—the connection to Landon.”
There was no way I’d be able to eat dinner. I was going to be sick. I had five days to figure out a bright side. “Have you talked to Landon about this?”
I didn’t have much credibility with the Werewives yet, but Landon freaking Fox had to have some say.
“A little bit.” Tessa put her hand on my arm. “I’m glad I have a chance to talk to you before we start rolling. Landon’s nervous about tonight.”
I chuckled. “That makes two of us.”
She shook her head. “I’ve known Landon a long time, and I’ve never seen him nervous before.”
The way she emphasized never pricked my envy. It was an unfamiliar feeling, because I’d felt nothing but annoyance for my ex for years. You’re doing this for Fiona, I reminded myself, even though the same part of me that was turning green screamed liar.
“How do you know him?” I asked.
“I take it you’re not a football fan.” She waited for me to confirm her suspicions with a nod
. “I was a sideline reporter for years. A football player is never more vulnerable than after he’s left everything he’s got on the field. It takes a special touch to get the guys to talk after a game—really talk. Landon and I go back to the beginning; we started in the game together. That’s how I know there’s something different about this date.”
This woman understood my ex more than I did. And she cared for him, even if it was just as a friend. That could work in my favor or blow up in my face. “Anything I should know before we start?”
“I’ve already interfered enough.” She laughed. “But I will say there are shockwaves rolling through the locker room that Landon has a family. I’m not the only one rooting for this to work out.”
As the crew turned on the cameras, I headed to the only place I felt safe—the kitchen. Landon’s condo was open concept and felt like a mountain cabin. Leather furniture, wood accents, and metal. The place could use a woman’s touch. Production left the plates, pots, and pans that I requested on the counter. Pulling the containers out of the fridge, I got to work. Without the restaurant, I’d been lost and this felt good—writing a menu for the night and making the ingredients come together. Food was how I expressed myself. It was no big shock that it was the only thing that always worked.
“Smells good. I’ve been thinking about this meal all day.” Landon grinned when I jumped.
I’d been so wrapped up in cooking and my own thoughts, I didn’t see him come downstairs. At least, I told myself that was why my heart was pounding. Not the way his blue eyes crinkled when he smiled, or how the gray in his hair made him look more experienced. His strong hands settled on the counter. He’d pushed the sleeves of his sweater up, revealing muscled forearms that led to broad shoulders.
“It’s been a long time, but I tried to remember what you liked.” I diverted my gaze back to the food in front of me. Salmon cooked quickly, and I wasn’t familiar with this equipment.
“A lot of things have changed. I’m not the same guy I was eighteen years ago.”
“Glad to hear that,” I said softly. For once in my life, I wished I wasn’t cooking. “Because I’m not that girl anymore, either.”
“No, you’re not.” His words tingled against my skin. “Last night—”
“A lot happened last night. Why don’t we think about this as a clean slate?” It wasn’t only that Landon’s presence filled the room with something warm, raw, and real, but the space he didn’t occupy was taken by the camera crew. I wasn’t ready to rip myself open and lay myself bare in front of Landon—let alone the entire viewing public.
“You came to Alaska to deal with the problem, Jenna.” Landon leaned forward, and I could smell him over the dinner. The earthy, musky smell of a shapeshifter that drove me wild long before I understood the consequences of getting tangled in his web. I knew what was at stake now, and it would take everything I had to fight his pull. If that was what I wanted.
He tipped his head, his gaze following me as I plated the fish and took the side dishes out of the oven. Steam rose between us. “Isn’t that why you came?” he asked.
“Yes. I’m worried about Fiona. She needs you. But she needs me, too. I spent a long time being really pissed at you because you were too busy living your own life to be a part of hers. The whole time, I was doing the same thing, but I justified it by the fact that I was home to tuck her in at night.”
Most nights, anyway. I couldn’t breathe—I hadn’t expected that confession to slip so fast.
“What’s your plan?” Landon picked up a dish and carried it over to the table. “I already put the beer out.”
Great, because alcohol helped every messy situation. “I want her to see that her parents give a shit about her. She’s tough—you know that, and you’ll see it every day, but she’s amazing. That’s how she gets away with half the stuff she does. She knows how to make people eat out of her hand. But I also want her to see that it’s never too late to do the right thing.”
“You’re using me as an example.” Landon grinned from behind his beer bottle.
“You’re her dad, you’re not an example. I was married to Charlie for ten years. She calls him Charlie and now that the divorce is official, they’ll never see each other again. He wanted what I could give him through the restaurant. Our ambitions were the same. We loved the same things, and I mistook that for loving each other.”
Landon’s eyes closed when he took his first bite of the dinner. He let out a low moan of satisfaction and grabbed his beer bottle. “What do you want, Jenna? Fiona’s eighteen in a week. Bringing her here isn’t solving any problems.”
“I know.” My grip was so tight on my beer bottle I feared I’d break it. I hadn’t touched my food. “I thought I was taking care of myself for a long time. But I wasn’t. I was successful in business, but my personal life is a disaster. My husband ran off with the bartender, my daughter is out of control, and I don’t know what to do with myself when I’m not in the kitchen. When I thought about where I might have gone wrong, I kept going back to you.”
Chapter Six
LANDON
Eighteen years ago, I convinced myself I’d be a better dad if I followed my dreams. Stadiums full of people had chanted my name, I’d won championships, but I came home to an empty condo every night. I didn’t have anyone to share it with. Back then, it was easy to find someone to spend time with. Still was. But I never found anyone I wanted to come home to.
Jenna wasn’t the only one who’d wondered what if. What if Fiona had rushed into my arms as a little girl when I got home from practice, if I’d been there to help her with her homework instead of having a few awkward interactions with her on court-appointed holiday visits. If I’d taken the time to listen to Jenna when she called about our daughter instead of arguing and placing blame.
You fucked up the first time, my animal said. The show’s giving you a second chance you didn’t expect. It’s time to be the man you always wanted to be.
“I’m glad you’re here.” I took a sip of beer as Jenna’s shoulders relaxed. “Never thought you’d be the one who made that bid.”
She laughed. My animal rumbled, loving the sound. “I thought I was being too transparent.”
“No. You’re the last person I expected to see walk on that stage.”
“Who did you want to see?” Leaning forward, she ran her tongue over her bottom lip as she waited for my answer. She looked gorgeous, with her long coppery hair flowing free over her shoulders. Tonight wasn’t a night for sequins, and she wore a long sleeved plum top that skimmed her curves, and jeans tucked into boots. Alaska looked good on her.
She asked a damn good question. “The Werewives aren’t all young women. There are a few moms. Everyone’s here for a different reason. I was hoping for someone I could sit down and talk to, just like this. That’s why I didn’t go for one of the sexy bids. I wanted more than that.”
“I’ve got a couple of those moves too,” she said softly, the color in her cheeks matching her red hair as she took a long sip of her beer.
She did. And I bet they’ve only gotten better, my animal purred. I didn’t want to think about Jenna with another man.
“I’ve missed your moves.” It wasn’t bullshit, just because she’d made me this incredible meal and was sitting across from me looking fucking spectacular. I loved making her flush, especially since I knew how it spread all over her body. Over her chest and down to her belly.
That was the best part of starting over. All the bad blood between us seemed like it happened to another couple as we sat here. Familiar territory was the most dangerous. “It came out all wrong last night, but how come you’re here? I know you said you came for Fiona. But what about your restaurant? And your husband?”
“They’re gone.” She closed her eyes for a long blink. “When I opened Bella, I was thinking with my heart and not my head. I’d taken out a lot of loans for the catering company I had before the restaurant, and even though I had the money, I looked like crap
on paper. Charlie said he’d take care of everything, and he did. The loans were in his name. I didn’t worry about it until he decided he’d rather work with our bartender than me. He told me all in the same night he was leaving and closing the restaurant.”
That sucked. “I’m sorry.”
“Me too.” She sighed. “Is it sad that I miss the restaurant more than I miss Charlie?”
My animal liked that, too much. “Is it sad that I understand?”
“No.” Her smile didn’t reach her eyes. “It might be some of the reason I’m here. Because I knew deep down, you’d get it. I had to get out of Santa Barbara. The restaurant community is small, and I was having a really hard time putting a positive spin on the situation. They saw me as a successful chef, and it hurt to admit it was so easy to have it all ripped away from me.”
“He took the restaurant from you, that’s all.” Idiot. But you made the same mistakes, my animal reminded me. Just because you want it to be different this time doesn’t mean there are any guarantees you won’t fuck up. Again. “You’re an amazing cook. This is the best meal I’ve had in years. It’s simple—”
“Food doesn’t have to be complicated. All it has to be is complimentary.” Her face lit up any time she got to talk about food. It happened the first time we were together, when we’d lay together, recovering from our night, sharing our dreams, and it still got her off. “That’s the secret—learning what to put together to make the flavors sing. I like to keep everything as fresh and real as possible.”
“What are your plans, now that you’re in Alaska? The show will keep you busy at first...” Because you’re going to claim her, my fox said. Make her yours before anyone else on the team can sink his claws into her. “But it won’t be enough for you.”
“This is like a vacation.” She grinned. “And fun for me to watch the ladies on their conquests. I came here knowing what I wanted. Did you know there’s an advice column on the show website called 'Ask a Werewife'? Well, they’re all asking me for advice.”
Silver Fox Page 4
