“Yes, thank you so much,” Honor replied, her tone flat.
“You’re welcome,” Patience chuckled.
“Okay, to summarize, you feel like Abel’s being a big ole bully in your relationship,” Honor said, her sweet voice amused.
“Yes!” Patience replied.
“Are you sure the problem here is with Abel or the fact that, for once, you’re not the biggest bully in the room, sweetie?”
“What?” Patience balked.
“Honey, it’s no secret that both you and Abel have somewhat….let’s say, dominant personalities. Is it really going to be unusual that there’d be power struggles between you? I’m just surprised it’s taken you this long to snap. Besides, in case you haven’t noticed, the women around us seem to gravitate toward big, bossy bastards. It’s like the pains in the butt are wearing magnets that attract only McKinnon girls. It’s been that way for as long as I can remember. It’s a family tradition. We’re surrounded by arrogant, aggressive alpha males intent on protecting us, Pitty Pat. How are you just now noticing this?”
Patience opened and closed her mouth like a fish out of water, truly stunned by Honor’s revelation. Then she thought about it. Cain. Jake. Zeke. Slade. Ice. Diego. And finally, freaking Abel!!
Honor was right!
“We’ve been overwhelmed by dominating douche bags!”
“Awwwww, it’s okay, sweetie! The good news is that those dominating douche bags generally always have our best interests at heart. They mean well. They’re just…. well, they’re men,” Honor stated as if that explained everything.
Closing her eyes, Patience shook her head. “You wanna know the worst part? Lately, Abel’s been right more than he’s been wrong,” she confided miserably. “Last week, we got in an argument over my running.”
“Your running?” Honor echoed, her face confused. “I thought Dr. Daniels told you it was fine if you ran. I swear, Patience, if you’ve been ignoring your doctor’s orders, I’ll…”
“Calm down! I’m not that mule-headed. Doc said it was fine if I continued to run during my pregnancy as long as my body didn’t tell me otherwise. But, when I came in from my jog last week, I was tired and winded and I guess I stumbled when I came in the door. Well, Abel, in typical tyrant fashion unilaterally decided that from then on, I’d have a partner when I went out running. Him! And if it’s not him, it’s Zeke! Which is almost worse! Both of them are constantly after me to slow down, but Zeke whines about jogging up the hills. At any rate, it pissed me off, Hon! Or, it did. See, last Friday, I went for my run over on Slattery Road. You know how uneven the pavement is over there, right?”
Seeing her sister nod, Patience continued. “Well, me, with my stupid pregnancy brain, forgot. The toe of my shoe caught on the edge of the road and if it hadn’t have been for Abel running behind me and his quick reflexes, me and the babies would have gone head-first over the ravine!”
Honor gasped, paling at what could have happened. “Patience,” she whispered, her eyes wide as she gazed at her older sibling.
“I know,” Patience acknowledged softly. “Abel saved my bacon.”
“He certainly did. And he’s also right. You’re almost six months along. You can’t be goin’ off by yourself and doin’ any ole thing you want anymore. There’s more than you to think about here,” Honor lectured.
“You know, you sound just like him,” Patience pointed out. “And I know you’re both right. It’s just hard. I feel like I’m expected to consult him about everything and I’m not used to that. It feels like I’m asking permission, and you and I both know how well I do with authority figures. It’s like last night; we got into it again about the bar,” she complained, feeling her blood pressure rising as she recalled the argument that she and Abel had about her work.
Honor frowned. “What about the bar?”
“He wants me to quit, Honor!” Patience growled, her face flushing with irritation. Oh, she knew Abel hadn’t meant quit in the strictest sense of the word, but asking her to change anything about her job was tantamount to treason in her book. She loved her job. The bar was her second home, damn it. And when Abel had told her that she needed to think about scaling back on the time she spent working, it had, understandably, infuriated her.
“You’re taking some creative licenses with what I actually said, aren’t you, Hellion. Some in my chosen profession might even call those words slightly slanderous,” Patience heard an all-too-familiar voice that alternately aroused and frustrated her mock from her position on the park bench. “That just seems unnecessarily harsh. Especially when I can’t defend myself.”
“Kiss my ass, Abel. Are you followin’ me?” she asked, glaring at her boyfriend over her shoulder. She wrinkled her nose at him when he tugged her hair and pulled her head back on her neck so that he could drop a fond kiss on her forehead. “You know, in some circles, they call that stalking. And that’s illegal,” she said, mimicking his offended tone with one of her own. Only mildly irritated with him, she couldn’t help returning his kiss when his lips moved to hers for a brief kiss.
“No, I’m not following you. I actually came out her to find Honor and let her know that Zeke is currently ransacking her kitchen for a slice of pecan pie. Something about you promising him a coveted piece if his blood tests showed a lowered cholesterol level. I guess his doctor just called with good news,” he explained with a grin at Honor. “He’s expecting you to pay up immediately.”
“That man,” Honor ground out through clenched teeth as she rose from the bench.
“Hey, you’re the one that has been starving the poor man,” Patience defended Zeke.
“There’s nothing ‘poor’ about our esteemed Sheriff. Believe me, he’s not wasting away. I caught Aunt Orla slipping him a bowl of chicken and dumplings just yesterday! And this morning he snuck three strips of bacon while my back was turned.”
“That bastard!” Abel gasped in mock outrage.
Sniffing, Honor narrowed her eyes at him. “I wouldn’t worry too much about Ezekiel, Abel. From what I hear, you’ve got a few boards loose in your own henhouse.”
“I heard,” Abel replied, raising an eyebrow at Patience. “And I never said you should quit. I said you should cut back on your hours. Ten hour shifts behind the bar are too much for a woman in your condition, Hellion. By the time you stretched out in bed last night, your ankles had disappeared entirely. And it wasn’t like that was the first time,” Abel reported, ratting Patience out to her shocked sister.
“You’ve been swelling that badly and didn’t say anything to us?” Honor asked, her voice raising. “Are you crazy? Do you know how dangerous that can be, Hardhead?” she questioned, her hands dropping to her hips. “It’s a sign of…”
“Preeclampsia. I know! I know! I’ve already called the doc and moved up my appointment to next week,” Patience groaned, staring unhappily at the ground as Abel took Honor’s spot on the bench beside her and slid his arms around her shoulders.
“Well, that’s something, at least,” Honor mumbled, still looking peeved with her sister and her risk taking. “But, it sounds to me like Abel may be…”
“Don’t say it. Please, just don’t say it,” Patience begged.
“….right!” Honor continued, ignoring her sibling’s plea. “Actually, Harmony and I were just talking about hiring some more help last week. Between her event planning business bringing in more catering jobs and you and Faith’s pregnancies, we’re gonna need some employees to take up the slack.”
Elbowing Abel when she caught his wide grin of approval, Patience quickly interjected, “Temporary employees. I’m not gonna be knocked up forever. Just three more months!”
“And are our kids gonna change their own diapers and whip up their own meals?” Abel asked dryly, turning his head to stare at Patience incredulously.
Stiffening, Patience turned her body so that she faced the moron she’d let practically move in with her. “I’m sorry. I’m fairly certain that I’m doing the heavy l
ifting right now what with the housing of two growing human beings. Are you telling me that you’ll be unavailable for diaper changes and feedings after these two little joys arrive?” she asked, seething with anger as she clenched her fists to keep from taking a swing at him.
“Abel, tread carefully,” Honor warned under her breath as she took a step back from her obviously irate sister.
“Honey,” Abel said slowly, keeping his voice as non-threatening as possible, “All I meant was that our babies will need both their parents when they get here.”
“What you implied was that I was going to be the parent solely responsible for the feeding and care of these kids, Abel! What? You think you’ll just breeze in for the fun stuff and breeze out when the actual work starts? Not flipping likely, Dimwit! You’ve lost your fool mind if you think for one second I’m gonna be the sole milk provider and be the only one strippin’ stinky diapers for these young’uns!”
“But, babe, you’ll be breastfeeding! There’s not much I can do to help with that. It’s not like God gave me the right equipment for it,” he remarked heatedly.
Patience wondered if steam was rising from her ears as she heard Honor murmur, “Abel, I know you believe in presenting a vigorous defense, but sometimes the smartest thing to do with a McKinnon woman is remain silent.”
“True story,” Patience agreed through barely moving lips before focusing her rage where it belonged. On Abel. “Who says, exactly, that my boobs are gonna be used as an all-you-can-eat buffet for two hungry infants, you addle-brained idget?” she virtually shrieked, hardly able to believe he’d made these asinine assumptions without so much as a passing question in her direction. Who in the name of all that was good and holy did this fool think he was? “For your information, I like my breasts, Abel! I like ‘em a lot,” she proclaimed, cupping her solid D-cups and displaying them proudly. “If you think for one single second that I’m going to let them become a couple of sagging anchors that I haul around for the rest of my life, you are not nearly as smart as folks round these parts think you are!”
“Now, honey,” Abel tried to placate, reaching out a hand to cover hers.
“Oh, no. No honey. No baby. No sweethearting your way out of trouble this time. I’m not one of those chicks that’s gonna get all mushy-faced and googly-eyed just because you called me by a pet name,” Patience denied adamantly, feeling the hot burn of righteous fury burning deep in her body. That, or she had some kickass heartburn. Either way, she was gonna need an antacid before this frickin’ day was done. “Listen up, Jackhole, because I’m about to educate your sorry tail. Breastfeeding is the mother’s decision, bucko! You might be Big Daddy where these babies are concerned, but your authority over them doesn’t extend to me. Or more specifically, you don’t get a say in what I do or do not do with MY boobs,” she shouted at the top of her lungs, squeezing her breast for emphasis (As a future note, she needed to make a mental note to remember that swollen breasts are tender to the touch. Because YOUCH!!)
Patience was gratified to hear a couple of other mothers in the park shout an “Amen, sister!” and “Breast POWER, Baby!” while pumping their fists in the air. It was always good to know that even though she wasn’t quite an official mother yet, the Momma Bear Pack of Paradise County would have her back. Lifting a hand, she waved enthusiastically and shot the moms a thumbs up.
Red-faced and sweating, Abel looked from Patience to Honor to the lynch mob of mothers gathering by the pond before he slowly raised a trembling hand and offered them his own wave. “Okay, Hellion,” he acknowledged softly, “I agree. You have fantastic breasts and what you do or don’t choose to do with them is your business. Formula is an excellent substitute. All the baby books say…”
“Abel,” Patience cut him off with a frightening look that promised a grim death if he continued moving his mouth, “You can take your books and shove ‘em where the sun don’t shine!” she ordered loudly, drawing cheers from the not insubstantial group of mothers gathering by the ducks.
“Noted,” Abel agreed weakly.
Clearing her throat, Honor tried to choke on her laughter. “On that note, I’ll just say that I do agree with Abel. You need to get off your feet more at the café and bar. We’ve got some applications under the counter at the diner. I’ll go through them and pick out a few to interview, okay? I’ll set them up for next Tuesday or Wednesday.”
Patience nodded somewhat hesitantly. “Okay. That works since my doctor’s appointment is on Monday.”
“Our doctor’s appointment,” Abel amended under his breath.
“Yeah,” Patience snorted, looking her man up and down. “Is the doctor going to stick his hand up your penis?” she asked excitedly. “’Cause I’d love, love, LOVE to watch THAT!”
“Dear Lord, I’ve finally found two people that make me feel like Ezekiel Monroe is the better option for company. I didn’t think that was possible,” Honor muttered “I’ll see y’all later. I’ve got a kitchen to go save,” she declared in parting.
Patience couldn’t help giggling at Honor’s genuine astonishment. “I swear, one day my sister is gonna see what she has in a man like Zeke,” she said aloud, watching her sister walk down the path toward the exit of the park.
“Babe, your sister knows what she’s got with the Sheriff. She’s just terrified of it. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned from you, it’s that nobody can run forever. Sooner or later, her legs will get tired and that’s when Zeke’s going to catch her.”
Forgetting for a second that she was irritated with him, Patience leaned against Abel’s side and rested her head on his shoulder. “Is it wrong that I hope we’ve got a front row seat to that event?”
“I think we might better concentrate our attention on the current show playing out between us, Hellion,” Abel replied, tightening his arm around her. Pressing his lips into her hair, he murmured, “I’m grateful you talked to Honor about your hours at the bar and getting’ some help in there for y’all. Thank you.”
“Don’t be grateful. She was just listing to me bitch about you and it came out,” Patience told him truthful. She slowly relaxed in his embrace as he chuckled beside her, seemingly unconcerned that she’d been sharing details of their life together with her sister. Of course, she was a McKinnon woman. They shared the details about everything with each other…marriages, relationships, children, health, sex, the color of the sky in March. No topic was too ordinary for them to tackle. And thankfully, since Abel had known her all her life, he already knew all of that.
“Did she take my side or yours?” he asked curiously as a small kid ran past them in hot pursuit of a yappy cocker spaniel.
“She’d tell you that she took mine, but in all honesty, she agreed with you on most everything I mentioned. It’s galling, I’ll tell you that. To know that even my own kin think you know better than me.” Patience clucked her tongue. “Y’all just wait until I’m back at my fighting weight. I’m gonna make every one of you sorry.”
“I have no doubt,” Abel concurred good-naturedly, lifting the hand behind her back to settle on the nape of her neck. Sitting beside her quietly for a few minutes, Abel finally whispered, “You know I didn’t get the Hummer to make you mad, don’t you? I just want you, Frick, and Frack to be safe.”
Patience’s lips twitched at the new names he’d come up with for the twins. Frick and Frack. She’d never tell him, but she liked those ones. “I know,” she conceded in a hushed voice. “I just wish you’d talked to me first.”
“You’d have shut me down, babe.”
He wasn’t wrong. That’s exactly what she’d have done. And then, he still would have gone and gotten the blasted vehicle. But, at least she’d have been able to say that she told him not to do it. She’d have had her say. Humming as his talented fingers massaged her tense muscles, she finally nodded. “I would have. You’re right.”
Digging his thumb into a particularly stubborn knot, he used his free hand to hold her hand as he asked, “So, will you
drive it? Please? It’s got plenty of room for you to maneuver and it’s safe for my family to be riding around in, Patience. Tell me that you can see that those are valid points.”
She was just too tired to fuss about anything else right now. There’d come a time – after the twins arrived – where she’d demand to have her Mustang given back to her.
And she’d get it, too, or woe be unto Abel Turner if anything happened to her convertible.
But that time wasn’t now.
Now, she needed a family vehicle, and there was no way in hell that she’d agree to a minivan.
No chance in hell.
So, she had to accept her fate.
The Hummer it was.
“Fine, Abel. I’ll drive it. For now.”
She laughed as she watched his face light up like he’d won the lottery. God, her man was a confusing contradiction of qualities. Most men would be depressed for days that they’d spent thousands of dollars on a tank like the Hummer. Especially since she’d been less than grateful when he’d given it to her.
But not her man.
Nope, Abel was ready to turn cartwheels in the street.
All because she’d finally - very much ungraciously – agreed to take his gift.
They were certainly a pair. A match made in Heaven. Or Hell, depending on which member of the family you asked.
Tilting her head back to look at him, she couldn’t help her grin when his excited eyes landed on her.
“That’s my girl! I love you, Hellion. So much that sometimes I don’t know what to do with it all. I hope you know that everything I do…even the shit that pisses you off…I do it because I want what’s best for all of you,” Abel informed her tenderly.
Ready, Willing and Abel (Passion in Paradise: The Men of the McKinnon Sisters Book 3) Page 30
